goodbye home

your mum is so funny i love her

Your mum is so hilariously unsympathetic but sympathetic at the same time. It just reminds me of my own and makes me so happy!

its so cool that in your family you can just talk about your feelings, and they'll listen and help you. I've never had that experience with my family.

Memories! I remember filming there arghhhhhh everything is changing

Also Hedy's a good interviewer

Wow there was some incredible wisdom being said in the car. "It is a shit home" was a personal favourite.

Did anyone else cry when she threw her stuff in the fire

I loved hearing Heddy in this video, she is so wise for her age. I hope she will be in another VEDIF.

Mums always know the right thing to say, your mum seems so sweet! 💗

I went through a similar situation and I totally get you. It's very very sad to leave a home and all of the memories you've build up in it, but time passes and although you might always be a bit nostalgic and sad you will eventually move on... Love you dodie <33

Hedy is so intelligent and aware and just so good at wording things?? You must be such a proud big sister lol

i've been thinking about stuff like this for quite a while, i'm a super nostalgic person as well and i'm almost 19 years old and have grown up in the same house for 18 of those. i'm a trans kid and my dad is SUPER not accepting of the lgbt community and im about to transition medically, and i have no idea how he's going to react to that, so my mum and i are worried we'll have to move out? it's making me a real mess LOL
but yeah, i really relate to this video, even though the circumstances aren't the same. i'm sorry you have to say goodbye but glad you have such a supportive and wonderful family to talk with about it!!

I completely understand how you feel. I went through this when I moved out of my parents house when I was 18. Losing your home is such a unique kind of pain. I remember there was a 2 month time period where I had to go into numb mode. I couldn't think, or feel, or I knew I'd have a mental breakdown. While I knew I was fine, I'd visit a couple times a year, I let myself over think and make it so much worse. I'm going to let you know, the months after are the hardest. You'll feel sadness, and grief, and be so overcome with emotions you'll feel like you could die. Let me tell you, you won't. This sounds cliche but it will get better. It's been a year, and I am completely happy again. That year was the hardest of my life, I felt like I was sleep walking, not really living. You learn that you have multiple homes, which are not necessary buildings. My mom for example, is my home. My first apartment, that I decorated all by myself and sheltered me during the hardest part of my life, is my home. The coffee shop I work at, is my home. The track field, where I spent hours running, is my home. The house, my boyfriend and I rent is our home, where we want to start out lives. Home isn't a single place, its the feelings, and memories associated with something. Home is a feeling of love, and you can feel that anywhere. The feeling isn't buried under the house you left, It follows you, and sometimes falls a little behind, but don't worry, it'll catch up soon. <3

your scooter is the cutest thing ever, but dodie i feel like you think you have to defend yourself for feeling nostalgic and sad about saying goodbye when you don't even owe anyone an explanation. it's okay to be sad. it's normal. you associate that house with childhood so obviously it will be hard to part with. keep your head up love!!

This morning I was sitting in class working on a chemistry test and all of the sudden my brain started thinking about my childhood and I was just like "oh fuck. My childhood is over. All of the things I did as a kid will never happen again. There are people I will probably never see again. I can't even remember what my elementary school best friend looks like anymore. Even my memory is flaking out on me. There are so many things that I will never ever ever be able to experience or recreate in any way. Fuck." And so I just sat there, staring at my computer screen, having a minor crisis is my head, all while I'm supposed to be completing a test.

i'll never know how this feels seeing as i've never lived somewhere for longer than 4 years but hell am i still sad for you

I understand this to a point and I understand getting rid of things but I don't think I could ever get rid of certain pictures and notebooks from my childhood and from school like she did in the fire. That just is a little crazy. I want to look back to my notebooks and see what I was like in the future... She's strong for doing this. I bet a weight was definitely lifted.

You are so much stronger than you think my friend. I honestly can't believe you threw that box on the fire, I'm not sure if I could have. But you know what, at the end of the day .. it's just stuff. You will forever have the memories. You don't need to physically have something in your hands to be able to think about the way it made you feel or the place where it was from. Home to me isn't 4 walls and a roof, it's the place where the people you love are that make you feel safe and warm xx

I just microwaved some toothpaste and my whole house smells like mint and my dad is coming back soon heLP

astrid and hedy are gold i hope they'll be in some videos in the future

your mum seems so lovely in that she always seems to know when to be straightforward or when to be sympathetic

i actually started crying a bit when you put that box on the fire. that was so strong of you. i honestly don't think i could have done that.
i'm really fuckin sentimental too, stemming from a breakdown i had in high school where i buried all of my journals from age 6-15. biggest regret of my life. i feel like those memories are gone forever - even though i know the ones that really are important will always stick around in my head, it's hard to let go of the little things. letting go and moving on is a legitimate skill, and it gives me hope and makes me proud to see you getting better at it.

aww dodie you were so brave doing this! well done for actually facing it all. xx

Dodes, is your Mum as lovely as she sounds?

You're so open with your Mum, it's lovely to see! Like you just...talk, about the stuff that's bothering you. Please don't underestimate how helpful that can be! <3

(also I thought you were going to chuck the cat too and i had a tiny panic)

Having moved 5 times in 8 years to 4 differed states, I can relate

hi dodie, hydrate yourself and take all the time you need and remember self care is always important. And it's also okay to be emotional sometimes, you are not in any way dramatic.
This goes out to everyone as well, be sure to always remember this💙💫

This made me realize how lucky/unlucky I was to move around a lot. I never had a "childhood best friend" or a "childhood home". But then I get really jealous of people who've known each other since they were little, and have that one house to look back at old memories. Then again, I think it's good that I don't cling on to material as I do actual experiences, and I also love how easy it is to take a picture and have it in your phone forever. Idk. I have mixed feelings about it all. At least I get to say I've lived in 3 countries!

this is even sadder now that tufty is gone :( i watch this everytime i need a good cry

i really wish i could understand this kind of attachment. I literally kept nothing for more than a few months, and all my childhood books and stories and drawings and school things I binned as soon as I could. I'm really proud you went through this experience and you'll come out a better person on the other side of saying goodbye to all this stuff.

this was a bloody dreadful video to watch right now, im in my first year of uni and my parents just sold my childhood home so i have to move out of there in the next few weeks. it's happened very quickly and i struggle with change, im a nostalgic person and also was a happy kid. i understand how you feel :-(

I was depressed and I started crying while listening to your cover of four five seconds, and listened to all the other sad songs then finally sick of losing soulmates on repeat many times and this went on for an hour. I'm finally done, and I just wanted to say thank you for singing and making me happy, and thanks for being with me throughout my darkest times. I love you. Thank you. <3

You probably aren't reading the comments because they make you upset, but if you're scrolling, please stop. It's important you read this. Literally this past year I've been going through the same thing as well. My parents were getting divorced and we moved out of my dads/childhood house around February 2016. You going through the same thing has eased my pain inexplicably. You talking about this has eased it as well. Yes, it is incredibly difficult saying goodbye to your childhood home, especially if you romanticize the past, but everything will be okay. You'll eventually be romanizing the present (key word: eventually). Anyways, just thank you so much for talking so openly about your nostalgia. It helps a shit ton :)

well done dodie, cant imagine how hard that must've been

I love that you're showing this to me... Literally everyone wants to move from the flat we're in but me cause it's home.. and I feel comfy and happy in it ...

I cried right when the box hit the fire. I struggle with derealization and letting go of the past, etc aswell. I know similarly to how you feel and I would have reacted the same way you did. Let yourself feel Dodie. Love you <3

you are so strong to do this.

When you put the "box of joy" in the fire, my heart dropped as if the gravity of this act just hit me...

When I first watched this video, I was very sad for Dodie and I hoped something like this would never happen to me, but today, it just did. it's very complex to explain and I don't really want to think about it, but I have to leave a large and important chunk of my life and memories behind. I understand exactly how Dodie feels, because the place I am saying goodbye to was so much of a part of my life it has become a large chunk of my identity and it feels as though all I am is being redefined. A place where I pictured my life to always be is a place I will now never see again. At the moment, I am trying to suppress it and stop thinking about it, but I know that the breakdown is looming. I can't get out of my head that the last time we pulled out of the driveway to leave this place, with no cares or realisation of what was going to happen, would be the last time I saw that drive way.

i have derealisation and depersonalization. I've been home from school for a year and i still cannot go outside. I can't ever imagine leaving my last happy memory like you just did.
This was the most brave thing i've seen in a long time. I salute you.

Even with small sad videos like these I still find myself with a wee grin. dodie I don't really know what it is about your videos but I always feel a little bit of happiness. so thanks I guess X

This must have been hard, but I'm so proud of you Dodie! 💕 I hope you're well

Honestly, my friend is going through something like this and I may send her this video and tell her to watch it <3 Love you Dodie <3

As someone that has always been sentimental, I found this video inspiring and brave. It must've been so hard to do what you did today! Sending love and happy thoughts<3

I feel pretty much the same way about saying goodbye to the past. You are so strong for doing this, Dodie xx

I find it interesting how everyone has their own little thing that makes them so emotional, in your case, childhood and artifacts of the past I guess. Of course, it's perfectly fine to feel this way. I applaud your bravery to alleviate yourself of these objects you seemed to cling to for so long. Remember that childhood is not kept in material objects but in memories that you will always hold dear to you, even if you have nothing physical. I hope that this helps you let go of constant nostalgia and that you find happiness as you start looking to the future. Because you are a talented woman with a bright and happy future ahead of you, I'm sure of it! Oh and side note, I read the description and I just want to say that you're an excellent writer, you should write more stuff, you have a nice style.

This reminds me of exactly what I went through when I moved out of my childhood home (13 years living there - age 16). I was devastated at the thought that the place that was always there for me would no longer be there. But I realized that a home and a safe/go-to place is a room with someone who loves me; not the same 4 walls. Hope everything is okay now <3

I can't even imagine how hard it is to do something like this, I'm such a hoarder of memories as well so I'm so impressed with you. I hope you're doing okay xxx

This reminded me of "Thank You little room you served me well." I didn't think you were over dramatic, I would be a wreck as well , because there are so many memories in a home . ❤️

I honestly dread the day my home won't belong to me & my family anymore so So many amazing memories & moments just gone no evidence of it at all. What will hurt the most is there's stuff that was put in the loft when I was a child & onwards that I will just break down with nostalgia when I see it again

Love you, dodie.
I'm usually a silent watcher (and I'm very behind on videos right now), but this video was too real for me to just pass by.
So, hi. Thanks for sharing. I love you.

Memories are fun but the prospect of creating memories is so much more fun.

There are moments in this video where I just want to hug and tell you that everything is gonna be alright <3 Much love to you dodie and hope will feel a bit better later :). Love your videos!

Oh Dodie. I'm sat here crying with you. It's 100% okay to feel every way you're feeling. We're here for you.

I'm so proud of you. you will get through this and you will be ok. much love 💛💛💛

Just well done, Dodie. <3 You're super brave and I feel this over and over again: Thank you so much for your constant state of being genuine and being vulnerable with us. I relate to how you feel, and I hope you're doing some extra good self-care. <3

I'm going through a similar thing, and I'm just appreciative of this video as a tool to help me frame the situation, thank you

When my parents divorced I had to say goodbye to so much stuff and no one has really done a genuine video on it so thank you

Totally feel for you - I know I'd have similarly sad feelings if/when my parents decide to move from my childhood home. :( But you do still get to take the memories with you, and lucky you have a sister to share this experience with. We are still so fortunate to be able to choose when to leave a home, unlike so many who are displaced and forced to leave due to war, natural disaster or abuse. Good to keep a perspective. But still sad! Much love to you both Xx

What a genuine, honest vlog. Thank you for being wonderful and being honest with your audience in the good times and in the bad times. I really enjoyed it. Love ya x

I know this was really hard for you to confront, and I'm really proud of you for getting through this. Much love

Thank you so much for making this video Dodie. I'm moving out of my childhood home as well and this video has helped me cope with it a little bit more.

I feel like losing your childhood home is similar to kicking out all of the stable support out from under you. Like, you spend years learning and growing off of memories and experiences in that one house, and suddenly that place is gone.

I am so proud of you. It was time. You need to stop depending on those memories for happiness. I love you all and I wish you the best of luck for the future.

You're so incredibly strong! I really want to give you a virtual proud hug! :)

WHy am I crying this isn't even my house?? I went and listened to "When" after this as well and it just made me love the song even more (if that's possible). I'm glad you're processing and moving on. Nostalgia can be amazing but it can also be dangerous. Love you Dodie 💕

I really admire you for supporting your family dodie! <3 It's what I am aspiring to do and honestly, its the only thing getting me through my phd program! Proud of you for moving forward! <3

I love these kinds of videos. I feel like we really get to know you through them <3 You are very brave for this video and it was a joy to watch <3 It will all be alright in the end <3

Hedy is so smart and mature, you must be so proud of her ❤️

This must have been really hard, but you got through it! Your family are awesome :)

I love how emotional you are. It makes me feel better about all the times I cry I'm a week 😂

I'm so proud that you actually uploaded today even though all this stuff happened to you today. So proud dodie, u da bomb.

This sounds strange, but I loved this video. It made me remember leaving behind my first home. So much of my childhood was wrapped up in one place, and watching this rekindled something very genuine inside of me. I'm not embarrassed to say that I cried. You are a wonderful human, and I hope that in time you and your family find healing and peace in moving forward. 💕

i know how difficult stuff like this is and i'd just like to thank you for actually making a video for us today even when you've been going through such a hard time. love you xx

I feel you, Dodie. I just moved from my childhood home this past summer. I didn't realize how much I love it until I was gone.

Dodie : Deep in nostalgia and tears about saying goodbye
Dodies mum: "There`s your childhood..... in the skip"
I LOVE THIS WOMEN ;P

well done for getting this vedif up, I thought you wouldn't, and I'm proud of you❤

I can't even express how proud I am of you! You're so sweet and brave and I am so proud of how far you've progressed !

next week I'm moving out of the house I've lived in since birth (I'm 18 now) and I'm feeling reeeeeeally shit about it. I remembered this video and came back to watch it and feel a little sense of comfort, or at least that I'm not alone in this situation <3

I actually teared up when you threw your memory box in the fire. I'm exactly like you and hold on to the past far too much so I related to that pain :( I hope you feel better Dodie :))💜

I cried during this whole video, because I went through a really tough time when I moved from the place where I thought I was the happiest ever. New beginnings are good, stay strong I know is hard but it's worth it 💕💕

we love you dodie, were all here for you <3

One thing i've learnt to remember from moving around a bit during my childhood, and having to say goodbye to my first house which held so many memories, is knowing that I'll always be making new amazing memories wherever I go and whomever I'm with. I stopped by my childhood home the other week and saw two little girls playing in the yard there, making memories of their own, and damn it made me so so happy.

And something else to keep in mind that makes me feel better when I give things to charity (or Op-Shops we call them in Australia) is that someone somewhere out there will love that little something that I don't need anymore. If I can make someone else's day by letting go of a shirt or a necklace I don't need/wear/use anymore...I'm content with that.

It is sad, but at the end of the day, you might be making someone else's life so much more enjoyable, and in a way, that feeling might just be so much more fulfilling.

Dodie, you are honestly the most beautiful soul and I'm so proud of what a strong woman you are despite all the crap that life throws at you ❤️

thank you for this. my parents are going to sell our home soon and everytime I think about it I start crying. no one else seems to feel the same way as I do and you're making me feel like I'm not alone

alright whimsical Hedy is back with great perspective and thoughtful thoughts

Your mom is the coolest! She even plays Pokemon.😀 I love you so much, and I cried for you. Just focus on how great your life has become. 😘

I totally understand the whole "home base" thing. My family want's to move right when I go off to college but then I feel like I won't have anything familiar to come back to and it is so scary. I've lived here for 8 years and it still feels like we JUST moved in and I haven't made enough memories here

Parting with (some pieces of) your past is something I feel like I could never do. I'm an absolute memory hoarder and I don't do to great with big changes, so I honestly think you're so brave for doing that.

Take care you all, the future's a bright one.

I have a 103 degree fever and dodie you are helping me through it! thank you for allowing me to binge watch your lovely vids as I try to ignore the pain (^U^)

I never realized how pretty Dodie's eyes are.

Dodie omg I'm crying watching this. I am the exact same way when it comes to memories. I feel you so much.

I freaking love Hedy, she's such a sweethear

I cry literally every time dodie cries because she's my role model. I love you dodie, don't suppress your feelings. We love you xxx

I remember when you first left and your 'little room' song and you've made me a little emotional about your own home, seeing how you've grown up and moved out up to now.
I am such a nostalgic person and I 100% relate to how you feel; I have so many boxes of school books and tiny pieces of paper and blummin everything from my past that i am so afraid to chuck out and let go of x

Oh God. It would absolutely tear me apart to burn all of my old stuff. I'm such a memory hoarder. I have so many notebooks from my 3-8 grade stuff. (it's mostly like old art and journals). Even old notes from my old friends who I don't talk to anymore.
I just could never see myself throwing it away because it's such a big part of me.

All the love and support to you, Dodie. <3 <3 <3 <3

I'm going through a similar situation with my own life right now- every now and then I come back to this video and just let myself feel. This video visually expresses a few of the emotions I'm feeling, and it makes me feel a little more sane to realize I'm not the only one who's been through this. So thank you, Dodie, for helping me feel a little less crazy, and a little more happy.

Your mom is so savage and supportive at the same time, I love it.

hey dodie, we all have memories. I know what you going through. I love your videos and you. you keep doing what your doing and everything will stay the same. greetings from the u.s. (aka, the states)

im sorry doddle. we all know how sentimental you are

I am an incredibly sentimental person so I can only imagine how hard this must have been for you! I started balling my eyes out when you put the box on the fire, you are so strong Dodie and I admire you so much for being able to do this. Sending you cuddles, it must have been so difficult xx

Dodie, I'm so proud of you. I would never be able to do something like this. Even though there were a few tears here and there, you did it. You will get through it, but you've already been through the hardest part.

I cried Dods, probably because I remember watching you from the beginning in that house, and I can tell how much the memories mean to you. Love you, and goodbye house :) xx

Im so jealous of the relationship you have with your mom and sister. I could never talk to my family about my feelings that openly

ahhh this takes me back to old Doddleoddle vlogs and ved you dont know how much i love this <3

im so glad you made this video. i know its very hard. im currently doing the same - going through old meaningful stuff and throwing it away. thank you dodie:)

im so glad you made this video. i know its very hard. im currently doing the same - going through old meaningful stuff and throwing it away. thank you dodie:)

i can't even imagine how hard it must be to go threw this, i also horde my memories and keep a lot of random crap that have sentimental value to me so i can relate in that aspect and i hope you feel better soon. very proud you got this vedic up in time :D <3

You are so beyond strong for doing this I am so proud you are amazing I just want you to know I love you💞💞

I don't know if there's a video that relates so much to how I feel about my childhood home. And going through things I've hoarded over the years and forcing myself to not carry that weight around. Thanks for being so real ❤️

So brave of you, Dodie! ♡

I have a similar box with a lot of memories in it, so when you put it on the pile I just started sobbing bc I would never be able to do that and I could just feel the pain and anxiety if I ever had to get rid of that stuff
I'm proud of you ❤

oh Dodie :( it makes me so sad seeing you so upset like this. I know this is hard for you but it will get better soon. we love you x BE STRONG DODIE!

This made me really sad but proud at how much you've grown throws strawberry sweets and sachets of wispa hot chocolate

I need more videos with older Hedy!! I love her so much oml!

Almost made me cry, I hope you're feeling good!

I'm proud of you💕

Wow what a moving video! And so well shot and edited. I hope everything gets better soon ❤️

your mum is so cool!

I'm glad you got your mam and Hedy a place to stay!
That's so lovely dodie, take on all the sponsorship you like and make the content you want your viewers to believe in. Your emotions are always raw, and everyone knows it. Sending love and light to you, xx

So bloody proud of you Dodie. So gosh darn proud. ♥

I know how it feels to say goodbye to a place with memories that mean so much.

hey dodie, I went through this exact same thing when I was 19. I'd lived in my house for 12 years, and so many things had happened and I felt like I'd be really lost but that feeling of home just swapped to our new place. It's the people inside, and not the four walls which make a home. and when I come back to my mum after being away it still feels like home, so hopefully it will be the same for you :)

Dear Dodie, everything is going to be tickettyboo :)

Thank you for sharing this with us, Dodie

Oh the feels :c

I've been getting help the past couple of weeks with clearing out the clutter at my place, but even then very little of it is mine, and it's mostly just family stuff that got left here as everyone moved away. I don't know if I could bring myself to throw away all my old toys and models. Well done to you <3

I am sooo proud of you doddie! You've spoken and sung about how attached to the past you are and this was a big step for you that had to happen xx

Aww I love mummydoddle she's sweet and hilarious

what a shouty cat! I relate.

Omg I'm sooo sentimental too and keep everything, I literally wouldn't be able to do this, it gives me anxiety just thinking about losing everything. You're so brave <3

I'm proud of you! i love your mum she acted just how i'd need it to be ! WELL DONE STAY STRONG.

Thank you for sharing something so personal with us, Dodie

Your mum has really good advice, i'd love to see a video with her in it

Heddy sounds so mature ❤

I'm such a nostalgic person by nature. I always felt like I was the only one. It's reassuring to know I'm not alone

I am really proud of you. This must've been just so shitty for you. I think you're very brave

God I'm honestly going to ball my eyes out when I leave my house for the final time. Home is not necessarily where your base memories are, it's where you return to time after time to feel comfort and security. Where you feel your truest self and have watched yourself develop whether that being other months or years. That is what home is to me

Wow this is really intense, you're so strong that you could even do it ❤️

<3 So proud of you Dodie

Your family is so precious Dodie, no wonder how you're so loving and kind

That scene when you your box of memories in the fire hurt me so much, so i can't even imagine what it was like for you. I am a very sentimental and nostalgic person when it comes to memories and belongings. I understand (to an extent) what you feel like when you talk about your feelings on this. But one lesson I guess I'll have to learn as I get older is that we can't hold onto everything. Thank you for sharing this with us. Love you Dodie <3

I love that I can extreme relate to ur love of the past well done I know how hard it is

well done for staying strong!

as an anxious person, I really appreciate this. There's times where I"m emotional and dramatic even if I know it isn't logical of me. It kind of makes me feel crazy or like I don't have enough self control so when I see someone acting similarly, it helps normalize the whole scenario. Thanks for sharing dodie <3

You should do a cover of "In My Life" by the Beatles. It helped me through similar situations.

I'm proud of you for doing this. That looks so hard! My family has a cabin that we go to in the summer. I can't imagine having to say goodbye to that place. I know my example is different but it's very much a part of me growing and it's where I can recharge both in reality and when I need to take a trip mentally, it's where I think of. Props to you for going through this and sharing it with us.

I get what you mean, Dodie. Having a certain place that your mind regards as a fixed point in time can be a very comforting mental tether to reality; something you can physically go back to when you just need something to be sure of. It can leave you feeling so lost when it's yanked out from under you. Here's to the future <3

When we moved from the last home my family shared before my parents divorced I cried like this. But I wasn't allowed to share my feelings because my mum was still angry and thought it was silly because we moved so much before that. It's great you get to talk about it with family. This made me tear up a little too. <3

I'm moving in a few days and I can completely relate to having to throw away all the happy memories from high school. I broke when I saw you put that box in the flames, but I needed to see that so I could muster up the courage to do it too. Thank you. <3

I cried with you. You are so strong Dodie. And your mom is cute af😂❤

everyone in the Clark family seems so wise I love it

Well done for keeping up with VEDIF x

Dodie's relationship with her sister is exactly the same one I have with my little sister and it's wonderful.

I understand how all that feels and I'm really proud of you and glad you're family is so supportive of your process with this! When I left my home, because of so many family issues, tons of my stuff was just abandoned and I never had the chance to say goodbye to it or decide what to keep. I'm glad you have time to address these things and there is no shame in crying over it. <3

Your mom seems amazing <3

It always so happens that dodie, you and I, we always... almost always go thru the same things around the same time. and it helps. it really does. it tells me I can be a lil bit more vulnerable as I let on. thanks dodie. means the world. love u

I remember having to move away from my childhood home and it was the hardest thing ever. I cried for days knowing I would never be able to go back. I remember I wrote a little note to the people who was going to live their next in my old closet.

we might be moving sometime in the future, and this would absolutely kill me. just thinking about it is so hard. i'm so proud dodie 💕

I'm currently going through this. My family is leaving the home we've lived in and personalized for ten years. It's a very weird experience, having to come to terms with losing such an integral part of your past.

This made me cry so much. It brought back all the memories of when I moved, it's been years and I still don't feel comfortable at my new house and that's terrifying to me as it means I might never be comfortable any where else

Throughout this entire video I just wanna give you a hug 😂

Love you too dodie, and yes it's totally alright to be upset over it, as silly as it may seem. :) sending you the best of love and wishes. <3

You say a home is a place that makes you feel comfortable, loved and calm but I believe that it is you family that do all of those things so home is wherever your family is, don't be afraid dodie it will all work out 😘😘💛

1:55 The field behind your back garden looks perfect for midnight walks with your friends

It's hard leaving a place that you've always known. I remember when my dad sold his house, the house i grew up in till I was seven. It was still my home until I was 12, even though I didn't live there 80% of the time. It was scary, for me, because even though the memories I had from that house were sad and angry and scared ones, it was the one solid thing that stayed the same. A lot of bad things happened in that house when I lived there, but it was still my home.

For me, letting go of the house started happening when I started to let go of the bad memories that had happened there. Through therapy that I've had over the past 3 years (just over a year of it was inpatient so it may take longer for people who have therapy in the community I guess), I've processed a lot of stuff. And the house seemed less important, because I'd let go of what was tying me to it. I suppose it might be harder for happy memories, but i think the same thing applies. You don't have to forget, you just have to realise that now that's in the past. You can remember it still, but you can separate yourself from it; it doesn't define you.

I hope you feel better soon, Dodie, but remember to take time to think, and to grieve, because that house; that home, was important. And you're saying goodbye. But now, it's a new start, a clean slate, and you can do whatever you want.

Remember: It will all be okay. Breathe. You're real. You're alive. And you are beautiful.

your mom seems like a great person to be with when you need to talk about something

ah gosh dodie im so proud of you <3

I may have cried just a lil bit... it breaks my heart to see you go through this dodie... you'll be stronger once you get through it though ❤️ think of it as a step to let yourself stop living in the past

For me it was when my Grandparents sold their house. There were so many memories and I didn't think the house would ever not be a part of our story. It was hard.

This video actually made me quite emotional. I really connect to the things you are going through, needing to say goodbye. You are brave for dealing with it, I don't need to deal with it until the summer and I most likely wont until then.

I am moving house after 14 years of living in this house, and I have serious issues with change. I relate so much to this. This will be the hardest thing ever for me

I'm honestly crying my eyes out while watching this... my moms house right now is the place I go to in the weekend where I feel comfortable and calm I just wanna hug u bc I know what u feel

I just recently moved and I know how you feel. Just wanted to put that out there! 😘

My family is moving out of a house that feels like where I came into my own and it's gonna be hard for me to say goodbye to it too. I relate

Fucking well done, Dodie. Honestly, good on you. That's all I can say.

I've moved quite a bit in my life and lost a lot along the way, so I know how it is to hold onto the little things

Just when I thought Dodie couldn't get any more perfect, she likes Rhett and Link too. DODIE YOURE THE ULTIMATE HUMAN BEING

This reminds me of last year when my parents moved out of my childhood home because we had a neighbour who was so so so horrid (and we had horrid neighbours the 20 previous years; but none a horrid as this one) and I'm still really mad at him for the horrible things he did while we lived there, but also for forcing us out of the home I grew up in.

Sending all the love and all the good vibes to you and your family Xxx

thank you little room, you've served me well.

God I'd never be able to do that, I always got so mad when people got rid of my stuff without my knowing. Props to you dodie

Oh Dodie! I know how it feels. Few years ago we sold our home too, the one where I grow up, where I had best moments in my entire life... But we need to move on. To think about it with smile. Life is long. And we should do anything, to make it good. Take care and let yourself cry all the tears you have, it really helps :)))

good little family you got there. good mum. how lovely. i wish my family was like that. we're all just such different thinkers it's hard to have a good conversation about our brains and stuff. but it works for y'all and that's good. makes me happy.

I actually started to tear up a little while watching this because it reminded me of when I went through something similar. I know what you're feeling :/

that was so brave when you said "this is the hardest thing" and then just went and did it. You are strong and lovely dodes

something about you just radiates emotion, and it's heart-breakingly wonderful. i teared up and i don't even know this damn house!! hope you're okay xxx

I've never lived in the same house for more than two years so I feel like I wouldn't ever experience this lol

you have such a supportive mum and sister, i wish i had that kind of open and honest relationship with my family xxx

My parents are divorcing, and I'm having to go through a similar thing with my home, except I'm 16, so I haven't had a chance to say goodbye properly yet. I don't hate my house, and it's just being really hard for me to process it. I'm glad you can say goodbye and be happy to leave, and I'm so glad everything's working out and getting better for you dodie!!

After my parents separated last summer, we're selling my childhood home. Really needed to see this video again. Makes it a little less scary and lonely

I felt like this and I've walked in what seems like an empty shell of a home. It takes a while, but it's a really nice breather once it's over. You'll feel better Dodes

watching this made me think of the condo i lived in as a toddler to about 5. watching the original toy story and just being with my mom on rainy days were amazing. i know i'll have to throw out all my old childhood stuff i've actually kept one day. i can't keep everything, it makes me cry a lot, but i can't hoard everything i love.

i could never do this. good on you for facing your fears and doing what needs to be done. stay strong. ❤

Hey letting things is really hard but making new memories is really easy and making new memories mean you replaced the old ones. You did it and you'll be okay.

I totally know how you feel Dodie. The first time I moved houses, from the place I'd lived my whole life to somewhere completely new with new members of my family (step-mother and brother) it felt like a loss, but since moving out of that house and into my own place it feels so much like this amazing gift of freedom.
I'm glad I said goodbye to that place so long ago, but I also look forward to my home that I have now, and the homes I'm going to create for myself in the future.

I feel like dodie's mum in the car is all of her audience rn

Getting rid of my old notes and pictures and stuff was one of the most theraputic and refreshing things I have done. Cleaning the clutter is like cleaning my life. There's new space for new memories. I feel you about letting go of the past. It's not easy. But you did it, and I'm proud of you for it Dodie ❤❤

This made me both really sad and happy at the same time. I might be moving out of the house that I've lived in my whole life soon. I know it's just a house but it's hard not to get emotional. It would feel weird not to be able to come back here and just exist in the same way I used to.

I've only ever lived in one house. If/when my parents move I will be heartbroken. I'll feel like I'm leaving behind the memories I made and the pets I loved who lived and died in that house. It's the tangible thing I associate with my childhood. I definitely understand how hard this must have been for you Dodie. Stay strong. xx

dodie this is so cute
p.s i love that its all lilac colour graded <3 (pls see this dodie)

Your mum seems so sweet! I'm sorry you had to deal with so much recently, but you honestly seemed to take it much beeter than I could've. Thank you for being so amazing and sharing this with us<3
Also, I'm so excited that you uploaded on my birthday :)
Happy VEDIF

Watching this reminded me of the day I asked my dad if we could go round to his parents' old house (they're both deceased by this point in time) to see it again. He said this would be a good time to let me know that my cousin rewired the electricity in the place to bring it up to code to rent it out, and it burned down to the ground. My grandfather built that house for my grandmother when they married, and now it's just gone.

I'm glad you got to see your place one last time. <3

Thank you little room you've served me well💙

I love you and your family. Hugs to everyone. I wish you all the best.

I am so actually proud of you for uploading dodie

A few months ago I lost my family home so I completely understand how you feel. The worst thing about it in my opinion is the thought that other people are now living in my home and it breaks my heart. Sorry you had to go through this. My thoughts are 100% with you 💕

Ah this makes me all emotional 😭 my home got all messed up & I've had to move around literally 18 times in the past few years and I'm like WHERE IS MY BASE PLEASE 😭😭😭

dodie i love you and i'm proud of you for going through this, especially getting rid of all your paper things from the past but.... do y'all not recycle?! 😢

I can only imagine what this feels like...
And I think it's amazing how you've captured these moments! How was cutting om this emotional vedif?

If anyone else out there is having a hard time of letting go, my aunt found scanning/ taking pictures of everything she was hoarding really helped. That way you aren't carrying around that pile of notebooks or letters, but you can still keep the memories. Yeah scanning takes time, but not more time than continually moving them. Love you dodie! <3

Dodie, the first time I heard "When" I felt like someone else finally understood being intensely nostalgic. Loads of people are nostalgic, but I've always been way too attached to memories, way too living in the past. I cry when I think about my favorite trees on my Mom's property being cut down one day by people who don't care about them. I'm 22 years old and she's thinking about moving someplace else when my little sister graduates, to get away from the memories of our family before things split up. I cannot imagine it. Everyone who knows me knows I care way to much about this house and the plot of land it's on. I'm happy that your family will be somewhere nicer, but it's got to be so hard. Cry your heart out. I hope it will heal soon.

I think Dodie is so cute and I love her personality, plus her name is similar to mind but mine starts with a J :,) ahah <3
I cried when my parents told me we we're moving house, turns out I've made better memories in the new house.

Doddie your mother is savage, I love it :D

I don't know why I keep coming back to this video... it's just so homey

Hey Dodie, I just wanted to say I am dealing with the exact same situation at the moment... It is really hard to leave your home indeed :( we'll get through this together !! Xx

I moved away from my childhood home a few years back and it was ROUGH!!! I totally get what your feeling, I'm very sentimental as well and I couldn't stop crying for the longest time. It'll get easier to accept, I promise 💕

This video makes me feel so many things. I feel so deeply what you're feeling, while I can't relate 100%, I've always been stupidly sentimental. Back when you wrote that song about your room and saying goodbye to it, I remember bawling so hard bc I know I'd probably do the exact same thing in between bouts of crying, and same goes for this, I can feel what you're going through as if I'm going through it myself.
Thank you for this video, I love you, and here's to a clean slate and new chapter of your future.

it's ok to feel sad dodie ❤️

Thank you for posting this, and showing that you have all these feelings. It actually helps me a little bit to know I'm not the only one struggling with this. My childhood-home is where I have all these happy memories of both my childhood and of my dad who has passed away. The new place doesn't have memories of him, and it hurts me. It may be a good thing for my whole family, but right now I'm not ready to let go...

Ahh! You winning that Rhett and Link contest is how I started watching you vids! I've seen all of them since and I'm still a fan ^_^

I've moved nine times in 19 (I'm rounding up oops) years. It's never any easier to say goodbye to a home and goodbye to the memories made inside of it. However, the people you've made those memories with don't change.

House change, walls and roofs and doors can all be different, but what occurs inside the combination of those things is what matters. Be sad that you're saying goodbye to an era of your life that was your life, but be sure to embrace the future in a big 'ole hug with the ones who surround you with love. <3

The future is probably Dodie Yellow, so you've got that goin for ya.

I may just be hungover, but this video made me fully tear up. I can't imagine my family home not being my family home anymore so I completely understand the emotions

it's a good thing to let go, dodie. Hang in there ❤

Your family are wonderful :)

I'm going through the same process right now, and I cannot tell you much this helped...

I have almost exactly the same problem with not letting go memories and since I'll be moving out of my childhood home this year, it's starting to hit that sometime this year I won't be turning into the little circle of houses that I called home and that really hit hard

Your Mum is me when I have someone else in the car for Pokemon Go

I love the description dodie 💜

Dodie, I feel like your videos are always such perfect timing. First with your Bisexual video and now this. I've lived in the US for all of my adolescent life, but in August I'll be moving back to Wales. I have to say goodbye to a lot of things and people and I just want to say thank you for being you. I'm only a 20 year old Welsh stranger in America, but I'm proud of you. You're an inspiration to me.

This made me cry harder than almost any sad movie I've ever seen. The idea of loosing the home I've lived in my entire life is one of my worst nightmares. Love to you <3

this brings back memories of moving and it breaks my heart honestly :^P I moved out of an ex boyfriends place and it was really sad. I hated living there but it was really sad knowing I was never going to see where such nice memories were made again. It was my first place without my parents and I cried for like a month straight. My life is way better now but I find myself looking back and getting sad that it's changed so much since I left. I don't know why that is.

Heddy is so insightful

I love you so much Dodie ❤️

When you constantly move to different countries in your life you will realise how much of a hoarder we are.

I can't express to you how much I relate to this. I am so nostalgic and I keep everything I couldn't image burning the diaries I have. My whole childhood we moved around a lot so I don't have a specific house that holds all my memories but I do remember we my family moved out of my last house and into the one we are in now all my friends came over to help me sort through all of my stuff(our stuff if we're being honest) and it was such an emotional day finding pieces of my life everywhere and deciding what to keep. You are very brave Dodie and I can't put into words how much I admire you for this and I'm happy to have someone I relate to so much.

I like what your mum said at the beginning when you said you wanted to cry, that your body knows what it's doing. I've never heard that before but that's a really great way to let someone know that what they're feeling is okay. So thanks Dodie's mum for that really nice yet simple statement about why it's okay to express emotions and cry.

I just moved a few months ago from the house I had lived I for my whole life, I cried watching this video, I also hold on the things with meaning and I am very sentimental, I have a memory box and many diaries to help

aw I'm crying for you dodie ❤

I am extremely sentimental. I can't imagine throwing away my old stuff when I move out. I totally understand how you're feeling 😫

It's weird that this video came out because I have phases where I think of my old home, and I'm in that phase again. I already made my peace with what happened there, and I'm definitely better off where I am now but I can't help but think about it.
Sometimes I look it up on Realtor websites and go through the pictures. It's so empty and full of natural sunlight, when I moved it was the complete opposite. My wall paper is still in what used to be my bedroom, a lining of pink paper with flowers.
I look around my surroundings now and I always remember how bleak my last few months were over there, over 10 years ago.

I don’t think I would EVER be able to do this so well done dodie x

Its nice to know im not the only one who holds on to everything, so thanks dodes ❤️

your mom is the best! i really would like to meet her. im sure shes as amazing as you are <3

So I thought this would be just a chill video but when you threw the stuff on the fire i started balling. The thought of my box of photographs just going scares me so much. You are brave for doing this <3

2:30 OMG DODIE WOT R U DOING I FELT UR PAIN I'M SORRY UR SO BRAVE

I have so many vivid memories of my childhood house: how it looked like, how my grandparents lived with us, how I spent hours watching cartoons on the tv, how my best friend and neithbour would come home and we would play for hours and hours. But nowadays it is a nursing home, so I rather not even think about how it might look. However, I go there in my mind sometimes, it will forever be there for me to "visit". Your house will forever be in your memory too, Dodie. Hope this makes you feel a little less sad.

Love you dodie!!!

As someone who has lived in 10 different homes (in just 14 years lol) I can't relate a lot... but I want to tell you (even if it's late) that I admire you, because if change has been hard for me, I can't imagine how hard it was for you...

Awwwww Dodie I love you. If you could reply my life would just be perfect. 😂😂

♡ You're going to be so much stronger after this

i can't deal with how cute and supportive your mum is oh lord my heart hurts

I actually started crying watching this because I remembered that I will have to do this one day

I just want to hug her so badly

"there's a pokestop" i respect these priorities

I was crying along with you as I am also very sentimental towards objects and things due to the memories they are tied to. I have tons of boxes of stuff back home that I know one day I will need to throw out if I don't want to be a hoarder when I'm an old lady but it's still really hard. My thoughts are with you, Dodie <3

DODIE I LOVE YPU THANKS FOR BEING ALIVE AND STUFF

I had a similar experience to this, it was in the summer where my parents finally decided it's time to remake my room- which was a bright, ugly purple, and I didn't like the entire composure of it and just bleh- and I was so excited when we got paint and ordered furniture but the first moment I was alone in my empty room, colour scraped out of the walls- I bowled my eyes out. I had this room ever since I was little, I shared it with my sister and I had laughed and cried so many times.

this video is partly relatable to me bc i am so attached to possessions because they ground me when i dissociate (or i pretend they do so I have a reason to keep them) but also.. people in the comments are talking about childhood homes and I can't even imagine how difficult it must be to leave that behind because ive moved around once every 3 years if you average out my life lmao

I have all my old school notebooks and my boos because I love them so much I can't imagine you being this strong to do this... <3

I understand you, but from a different way (?) I'm a hoarder with memories, the good ones and the ones I want to keep. Mainly with pictures, videos, tickets from movies and random events I go to. I have some pictures and movie and event tickets taped on the side of my shelf, and plan to fill it all up, along with some parts of my wall. I constantly get notifications saying my storage is almost full, and I'm sure it's from all the random photos and videos of my friends and family. Also in my snapchat memories, I save pretty much everything. I take most of my videos and pictures on snapchat so I save them there and it doesn't use up my storage. I have no where else to put the things in my camera roll, and I'm afraid I'm going to use up all my storage, or worse, lose every photo and video I have.

some people say "home is where the heart is" it wasn't until my late twenties that, to me, that will always mean "home is where my mom is."

you're an incredible human being, dodie. keep truckin', bby. You got this.

I can feel how sad this is for you and I'm crying :'(

Love you dodie!

I just finished filming a video about home(s), I feel you dodie :)

Having moved home more times than I've had birthdays I can't really understand what you are going through but I hope things are a bit better now.

This reminds me of the other day when i went to see my old babysitters house from when i was younger and it looked so different from how i remembered if and i just started sobbing

this video made me realize in a few years i'm going to have to leave the house i grew up in. unless something drastic happens, i'll have lived here for a total of 18 years. all my life. i love it so much. worst part is when i move out so are my parents as they'll be moving as well (we already own the house they'll live in)
not only that but this video made me motivated to go through "the box." the box is a shoebox full of memories of my grandparents who are gone now, but i loved them. so many memories of them.
thank you, dodie.

It broke MY heart when you had to burn all that stuff gosh I wish you the best dodie and all the happiness

Oh my goodness Dodie, you have no idea how much I relate to this video. Even though my parents split up many years ago, we're selling the house just now. It feels like a huge loss even though i technically live in a whole other city bc of school. And i also relate to that thing you said about the before and the after, that house, still even though everything went to shit a few years ago. It still represented in my mind that happy future i always imagined for myself and my family. Together. Like somehow the person i wished i would've been was still living on in that house, a lot happier than my current self. But i hope it'll get easier slowly. I know it's hard, but we'll make it through ❤❤

I've had a lot of emotions stored up for awhile. I started following since like last summer and I've been able to connect with you so much. This video hit me hard, but I started crying like a baby when you talked about the Rhett and Link picture. Those two were the first people I started watching on YouTube in 2009 and I remember that song by them. I felt overwhelmed by happy emotions of Rhett and Link, how much my life is changing, and I felt somehow more connected to you. Like we go way back when I didn't even know we went way back. Sending all the love from Ohio!

honestly this must have been so hard for you. I dislike change so much and even the smallest changes seem to affect me massively so a massive heads up to you and sending lots of love your way xx

my god did this video make me cry, sending you so much love man <3

I'm really proud of you :) I could NOT be able to do that at 2:30 that was very very strong and brave of you, wow.

Was that her brother talking at the end of the video? Also I really appreciate that Dodie shares these things with us, not many youtubers are comfortable sharing the difficult, and while its okay to just show the happy things, I appreciatte it when people share things that are sad for them. Love yall!

I went through the same thing! My family wanted to move but I didn't, I felt like the home where I grew up would be a constant thing in my life, and then it wasn't..

I could totally understand your sadness. I had to move house about 3 to 4 years ago. Until now I still find it hard to stop calling it home . Luckily my parents didnt sell it so I still come back home whenever I feel lonely and need someone to back me up. Remember my words. no matter what, our home is always our haven. at least it is for me.

We moved out of my childhood home 5 years ago and it was so weridly hard I remember crying my eyes out .. I totally understand why you're crying!!

I went through a similar situation a few years back. When my grandfather died, my grandmother though it would be too hard to keep up the house she lived in by herself. That plus it was like a hundred years old, the foundations were slowly deteriorating. We emptied the house and my grandfather's barn (which was mostly his workshop, they didn't have any animals) and they were both subsequently destroyed.

My grandmother has a minihome now, on the same spot as before, and it's fine. But I'll never get to visit the old house again. I still cry about that house whenever I think too hard about it.

And that's just my grandmother's house! I couldn't even imagine if my parents sold our house. We went really close to moving a few years back, and I categorically REFUSED to visit any other houses as wishful thinking. It worked out for us, luckily. I totally know how you feel, Dodie. It'll get better, I promise ❤

dodie i love you so much and I wish you the best. you are strong

I couldn't get this video out of my head. It just hit me really hard because I'm going to college soon and I've collected so much stuff in the last couple years from boyfriends and random movie tickets and just things that I wanted to hold onto and I burned all my stuff in a fire because I just wanted to let go. Thank you for making this video Dodie.

Love you dodie 💛💛💛

I've only ever had one family house in my life and even though I'm 23 and haven't 'lived' in the family house for like 5 years I don't think I could cope letting go of it. Yes it's just a house but I was so happy there and it's been the rock that I can always go back to to escape the rest of my life. Stay strong and cry it all out :)

I'm so proud of you. I own a whole ton of stuff that I don't need but I can't build up the courage to get rid of it. This video may actually help me in getting my act together and throwing out a whole bunch of things which I keep purely for sentimental value.

I'm also a very nostalgic person and I moved out of my family home a year ago and I kept so much crap that I don't or never will need for memories sake. This video made me cry so much because I could relate to everything :') I think I need to go through all my stuff and get rid of it because I think I've realised now that it's not healthy :)

3:50 YES Dodie. I resonated sooooooo much with that statement! My family moved out of the place I'd called home for the past 10 years of my life back in October, and I was absolutely devastated and terrified. I'd just moved away to college, and already being away from home is hard enough, and then I realized the one place I felt I would ALWAYS have to go back to wasn't mine to go back to anymore. I felt like someone had just pulled a rug out from under me. I felt homeless. I still feel a little homeless. I recorded a ton of video of that house before we sold it to try and keep it with me forever, even though I knew it would never compare to the real thing. I remember crying through it all. I was so lost and upset. The hardest part was leaving my bedroom behind, because it held bookshelves my dad had built for me 10 years ago, but we couldn't take them with us. Horrible feeling to leave those shelves for someone else to use. Change isn't always easy. I'm also very sentimental and I love nostalgia, so I can relate to what you're going through. But, things will get better and easier ❤️ Sorry for the rant!

I had a weird experience when it came to childhood homes. I've lived in four houses in my 19 years - one I barely remember, one I always thought was going to be home, one that was a way station between homes, and the one I'm in now. When I was 10, my family and I moved counties to further down south because my dad's job had relocated and he was having to travel 5 hours everyday just to get there and back. we never saw him because he'd leave so early and come back so late, so my rents thought it would be best if we just move closer to the new building. leaving that place was one of the hardest things I've ever done, but at the same time, I was only 10. I idealise that place in my head, but in reality I know it would have ended up being too small for us anyways. I've now lived in the house I'm in for longer than I had back then. moving is weird. I've always been so confounded by people who live in the same house their whole lives. I feel like I have two childhoods because of when I moved, it's weird. there's the childhood I had from 3-10, then there's the childhood I had from 10-now. theyre so distinct in my head because of how drastically different they are.

I don't really have a point here. I just don't get the chance to think about this as much. I do know one thing, I highly doubt I'd be the person I am today if I hadn't moved. I can't even imagine going through my teen years back there anymore. so I guess that's something.

looking forward to more collabs with hedy 😊

Aw dodie :(( ❤️

i'm so proud of you for processing it :)

I remember when my parents sold my childhood home I was so sad leaving because it wasn't my house anymore (they had done a lot of cosmetic stuff so it would sell) and even though I wasn't that happy in it & I wasn't really attached to people in the area it was still sad & I cried like a little baby when I left the driveway for the last time. Such a strange feeling being sad leaving a place that had so much stress attached to it.

aw dodie, i remember commenting on that video maybe a year ago that you could actually only make ads and we'd still watch them and I now stand by that saying so much. your family is lovely and you all deserve the best :) remember home is the people not the place

I'm in tears. I've know exactly how you feel. My family left our home of 10 years 3 years ago and it was hard. I luckily got to keep a lot of my things and sentimental stuff but I did lose some things on the way and it was so hard. I can't imagine having to throw out my old school journals and birthday cards from friends. The worst part is you know there's no point in having it besides nostalgia and memories, but it's so hard to let go because it almost feels like you're getting rid of those memories, they won't be as vidid as they are when you read from your old stuff. Oh my goodness I wish you well and hope you feel better.

Happy vedif, Dodie xxx
lots of love <3

I really wish I could talk to my family like this

This reminds me of when my family had to sell my grandparents house after they died. 😭 It's hard to imagine someone else living there.

that video was so good dodie! very nicely made, very artistic. And Aldo very emotional, but can you imagine, that somebody next will be making new beautiful memories in this place? And maybe will be in tears one day when will have to say goodbye to this house!

this video hit me pretty hard and i guess im just really thankful you made it

This is really helpful to me. I moved around a lot but I have so much stuff I accumulated and it's hard to let go. Seeing you do it makes me feel like maybe I can do it too because it's so much stuff and can be frustrating because I don't have room for anything new.

How do you feel in this moment about all this? Good, bad, between?

Stay strong dodie I love you Hugs

oh my god , I understand this feeling so much RN. I'm literally moving tomorrow from a one bed flat I had on my own for the last 2 years in Cardiff... to a room in London. I've spent the last week sorting through so much stuff, taking it to charity shops or throwing it away. I'm an incredibly sentimental person and I cling on to things even for the smallest memory. Ive had to ask myself "do I need this...or do I just want it" a lot lately.

I express myself best through lyrics and music and this is a song that has really helped me through a lot and it's written by someone I admire deeply but also feel like is my friend even if I've never met her so I figured I'd add on to it:

I know you see the world in a blurry haze
But just like before, you will be saved
And I get that they won't get it
That you'll save yourself and you won't regret it

You'll make new memories to replace the old
And soon enough, it'll be easier letting go
And I get that that's not what you wanted
And it's ok if you can just barely bear it

Little things, all the stereotypes
They're gonna help you get through this one night
And there will be a day when you can say you're okay and mean it

I promise you it'll all make sense again
I promise you it'll all make sense again
I promise you it'll all make sense again
I promise you it'll all make sense again

Recently my parents moved out of our family house to an 11 hour drive away. It was a really big thing to deal with at first, not because of the physical home but because our family gathering "base camp" was changing. It helped me to remember that home is not a place but a feeling. Home is where those we love are.

Sending love, change is hard xx

This makes me so sad, I'm a really emotional person as well and I literally keep eVERYTHING just for the memories, I'm only 16 at the time but I really feel like if I throw them away I just won't be able to remember the happy times I had when those letters, drawings, etc. were done and it scares me, change scares me a lot and I know I'll have to throw them away at some point, I can't keep collecting every single thing and as time goes by it will be harder and harder to let them go but I'm not ready, not yet.
Also, I lived at an apartment for the first 15 years of my life but idk, it stopped feeling like home since I was like 12 which kinda sucks because I haven't felt like I've had a home for the past 4 years of my life and stuff but also, I guess that if my dad who still lives in that apartment I grew up in ever moves out, at least it won't be as hurtful, at this point I think I'll cry more when I leave my amazing highschool than when I leave any current house

I have a very happy life right now and also collect everything but know I'm scared I have to much stuff and will have to do this someday. it looks so freaking hard and just thinking about what you're going through makes me sad. but I'm so happy and proud of you that you're officially starting the next chapter in your life!😊

When dodie goes and puts that box on the fire with her memories my heart breaks because I could not do that

Just remember, all things happen for a reason. Change is good, although some people don't think it is. Some things have to change so other things can happen. Soon, your new house will feel like home and if it doesn't, that's okay. Remember to talk to someone about how you feel. If you feel comfortable with the house, you'll settle easy. I know you'll get through this, Dodie. I love you lots x

Dodie, memories live on regardless of whether or not you hold on to material belongings. I really recommend watching the Netflix documetnary The Minimalists, it honestly changed my views on so many aspects of life!

this is so interesting because i've never had a home home before. my family and i moved around so much (probably over 10 times), so i always envied people who had somewhere they grew up in.

After watching this I went straight to google maps to see my childhood house... So many memories!

that made me cry! I recently moved out, me and my family from my childhood home and I as the exact same way, but my family always reminded me that my home will always be wherever they are (not to mention our house was OLD and falling apart around us so it was a good idea haha)

I totally know what you mean by suppressing everything. Watching this reminded me of the night my mom and I left our family home. That was months back and I still haven't fully let myself feel it.
It's really lovely that your mom and Hedy have a new place that is close to her school. Moving sucks, and saying goodbye to the place where you grew up sucks, but you are a very strong person. I'm genuinely happy for you that everything worked out okay. <3<3

"there's your childhood, in the skip" ASTRID SNDBJSBSHSB

Aww your mum is so sweet! & I'm the same, letting go of the past is hard. But when you let go it takes so much weight off your shoulders. It's gets better though, once you learn to let go of the past its not as heart shattering. But seriously don't sweat the little things & i would have cried too especially letting go of so many great memories! ily dodie x

I am going through the same thing right now so I totally understand. It feels like I'm leaving behind an old friend.

As soon as I saw you crying I knew I was gonna cry at this video. And I did. Hard. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult it is to do this and I am dreading doing it in the future.

I don't think I would be able to do that to all my old stuff, your amazing 0-0

I related to this in so many ways. I recently moved to university, but whilst doing this my mum also moved house, which meant everything I knew changed. So thank you dodie for uploading and understanding

Awww dodie seeing you cry breaks my heart</3

I understand this feeling, I never got to say goodbye to my childhood bedroom. My bedroom was an addition to our house and summer we had to tear it down because of water damage. I helped tear down the roof and knock out the walls and it was extremely depressing. I'm in university and when I come home for break it gets kind of sad.

Ahhh memories of all the videos I've watched of you in the past (who else watched the ice bucket challenge of dodie here!!)

Aww Dodie. It's good to hear that you're trying to let go of the past and move forward. I know how sentimental you are as a person and that's not a bad thing! It's good to let your emotions out. <33 Letting go of your childhood home can be tough, especially if it holds good memories for you. I moved to a new house a few months ago and i don't miss my childhood home one bit! I had so many good memories with it, but i don't feel sad leaving it behind. I'm sure it's gonna get demolished someday because the conditions of the house are pretty bad.. long story. Now if it ever got destroyed i'd probably be sad but oh well. Life is life and it's healthy to move on. OH, also there's no way in hell am i letting go of my memory box. It's too precious, so you've got real courage doing so.

This hit pretty close to home. Also, I've been deathly ill the past 2 days and you posting is what has kept me goin ❤

I know I'm a day late :( but I wanted to tell you how therapeutic this was for me. I am leaving my town of all of my life in a few months and we're starting to pack up my house. It's upsetting because I don't feel like I have a home anymore. To see someone going through this as well was comforting to say the least.

i love you Dodie.
You are such a precious human

this video has a tint of pink in it and it's aesthetic and soft

My family may be moving house soon. And like you, I keep all of my memories (photos, letters etc). But my room in the new house is very small and I can't keep it all. I think letting go will be a big challenge for me. And I'm proud of you for doing this, I know how much this must have hurt.

I literally started crying silently when dodie cried in the car. Thx dodie

Found you via Tessa & you are definitely one of my new faves. Adored the video where you two were talking about mental health. Love your personality, your music & also your eyes are BEAUTY-FULL, girl! So, YAY, you have a new YouTube frand now. hello! ^___^

This video is art. I know this is so hard but the way you captured this moment was so genius and beautiful and I really think this is really relatable. A short film masterpiece.

i like how they're talking about something v important to dodie and then her mum just says 'can you get some pokeballs for me' lmaoo

your mum seems so cool, she reminds me of my mum. I can imagine how you feel, though. I love my home and my parents have been talking about selling it when I go to uni as it's just kind of big and would feel empty without me and my two brothers. So I get it. They would be so much more at peace somewhere else. BUT I JUST REALLY DON'T WANT MY HOME TO BECOME SOMEONE ELSE'S. Well done for getting through today, Dodie. <3

i actually cried while watching this because it reminded me when my nan had to move out from her beautiful cottage. i had the best childhood there. the cottage was so pretty, there was sheep in the field next to it, an outstanding forest with horses in the field next to a old fashioned mansion. when she had to leave (they wanted to knock her cottage into the one which backed onto it and make it into a house, and because she rented she has no choice). but that was my second home. it's so sad and all but these things happen ❤️

I love my nana's house. my family has always been fairly argumentative so there is often a lot of shouting in our home, and as a child it used to really upset me as I hated how loud everything could get. nana's was a refuge - we were all on our best behaviour so there was never any conflict (spare a few times) and it always smelt of cupcakes and her perfume, it was safety for the day or for a weekend. therefore, one of my favourite places in the whole world is the back bedroom with the pink curtains as it was 'my room' when we came to stay and I can't help but feel anything but calm when I'm there. the whole house is just so beautiful, in ways I can't explain to anyone. last summer I lost my granddad; it was difficult but bearable as he had had dementia for many years so really we lost him a long time ago, but I cannot imagine not having my nana around. she's 83 now and has always been remarkably fit, still ice skating twice a week (!!), still driving, and never having any issues with mobility but I do know that losing her is inevitable and so is losing the house. my grandparents bought it as a newbuild, it has never been anyone's but theirs and the idea that someday the curtains will be different and the green sofa will be replaced and the cross stitches will be taken down off the wall is genuinely unbearable to me. one day the wallpaper and carpets will be different and they might change the kitchen where I learned to bake and there is absolutely nothing I can do whatsoever to prevent it from happening.
I've left this ridiculously long comment partly as a small therapy for myself (I've had a good cry and I firmly believe that's the best way to deal with difficult emotions sometimes) but also as a thank you for being so honest about your experience. thank you also for being so dramatic, because it reassures me that I'm not being a total idiot by getting so upset. although no two situations will ever be the same with this kind of thing, I feel like we're feeling the same (even though I haven't even begun to think about dealing with it yet) and I want to let you know that I think you're amazing for dealing with it all so well. I'm proud of you, and I know I'll have this video to be able to look back on when I need it :)

I've always moved house regularly. I used to hate it when I was younger but now I feel like it's kind of a good thing because I'll ever experience losing my childhood home with all of the memories. The memories have moved with me in my mind rather than being attached to a specific place.

I do'nt know why this made me cry! 😭 and i never cry!

Currently holding in tears, moved out of my childhood home of 19 years the summer I was leaving for uni due to financial struggles and my dad being ill. One of the hardest days (I am also a hoarder and tried to keep everything) xx

My heart is breaking for you. I admit, I moved around a lot as a child, so I never really had that bond with a specific place...but my lord, the stuff we have carried around with us all these years! I can hardly bear to say goodbye to any of it! I've only just thrown away PRIMARY SCHOOL exercise books for goodness sake, and I'm in my third year of university, so I guess I understand how you feel. I hope you feel happier soon and, as always, thankyou for sharing ❤

Oh jeez I hope you're okay x

The hardest goodbye I've ever had to say was when I packed up my house from college and moved out to DC. I was simultaneously saying goodbye to my home, my city, my college life, and my best friends (who were basically family). And I was leaving for a new life where I didn't have a job yet, know the city, or have any personal connections whatsoever. My mom drove the moving van from Columbus to DC, and I remember sitting in the front seat as we drove away and just sobbing. Not a gentle, glistening tear but full-throated sobbing. And my mom speaking gently as I had my breakdown, "I know it's hard sweetie, just let it out. This is just one of those moments." I don't think I've ever felt so desperately heart broken. But I knew that period in my life was over- even if I had stayed in Columbus, or gone to grad school, or tried to cling desperately to the happiest time in my life. It was time for a new adventure.

Dodie I don't think that I could do what u just did so good job👏🏻😘

I grew up with my family in my grandparents basement apartment on a beautiful lake, surrounded by trees where me and my brothers built tree forts, and had adventures. It is the first home I have ever lived in, from the day I was born. It is also the first home that my mom ever lived in. This spring, my grandparents are selling it; I will never again spend an evening staring up at the stars on the deck, or canoeing out to the island where my dad built me and my brother a fort when we were young. I will never be measured on the wall in the storage room that holds heights from back when my mother was my age.
My family moved out of this home when I was ten, and since then we've moved all over the city (and to a different one) and when we moved back, we lived in my grandparent's house for the summer again. While I was there, I realized that I would never again live in my true childhood house. It's hard saying goodbye to a place where you have spent so many fond memories. This house holds some of my happiest years, and now it's gone.
I'm a nostalgic person. I keep all my old journals, letters, schoolwork, and photos. Anything that takes me back to the past, to simpler times, is close to my heart. This can be unhealthy, since it isn't good to dwell on the past and forget about the present, but my soul craves this nostalgia; it feeds off of it, and now I'm letting a large piece of it go, and the nostalgia that feeds my soul is slipping away.

I moved a long way away from my previous home recently and dodie I know exactly how you feel. That place held so many of my memories when growing up. The summers I spent laying in the garden with friends, the winters we spent infront of the warm fire. But my family had to leave that all behind. I left behind my best friend olivia who I am so lost without and even though we text and call it's still not the same as being with her in real life. I left behind my amazing school who treated me so well as a student and they cared so much for everyone.
But everyone's life needs a change. Even if it's as big as this. And I know it's hard and it's tough but it's all a stage in life. Pick yourself up and keep walking don't let it sit in the back of your head because now you and hedy and your mum have so many new opportunities in life that you need to go for.

I know hedy will make so many friends at her new school as she is so sweet and kind hearted and people love that.
Dodie don't let this make you cry, be strong as we are all here for you and we always will be ♥️✨

alternate title: take a shot every time dodie cries

Your mam is great, has excellent motherly responses to things. Lots of love. Also now I want pizza

Hey dodie
This video made me cry so much because I know exactly what you're feeling right now. My family is moving out of my childhood home but I can't even go back to say goodbye because it's so far away. I didn't know the last time I was there really would be the last time. I feel like I don't currently have a home base and that's a freaky feeling. Anyway it's just somewhat nice to know that another person is as nostalgic and attached to the "good times" as me and going through the same sort of thing. Good luck and thank you for making this ❤

I relate so much, my childhood home is being sold too and it’s rented to another family now. It’s so easy to cry about it even though I moved out already like 2,5 years ago

Your mum seems so amazing. Omg

i keep coming back to this video and honestly? i could NEVER. my fam and i did move house about two years ago, but i kept my things. and when i move out of here in september, i'll put the things i can't take to london with me. the idea of literally putting these things in a box and burning them and walking away is UNBEARABLE. that takes a lot of strength. the couple who bought our old house broke up and moved out, and since then, it's been empty. so now i can't shake the thought of buying it one day. maybe not even to live in it - although, why not. just to have it. just so it's mine again. because it is! it's my home! i miss it! damnit! - jessie

this is beautiful <3

i think seeing your reaction to this is so interesting and it's made me think about my own childhood home a lot. I just started uni and my mom still lives in the house i grew up in, but we don't own that home. My mom never bought a house, so i've always known that my childhood home would some day never be there. I knew that one day we would rent a different place or my mom would eventually buy a house, and that one day i just would never get to go back there because we wouldn't live there anymore. and it's a shit house, well, its an apartment, and its tiny and i wouldn't really miss living there at all. but seeing you so sad over how you're never gonna have that "home" anymore makes me realize that one day i'm not going to either. like im gonna be a grown one day and thinking of when i was little and all the memories i made in that house and im never gonna be able to go back there and relive it for a bit. idk, i guess im just suddenly realizing that a big part of what has shaped me into who i am has never been a constant. i hope you're doing well and youve kept a lot of memories from when you were young, and maybe you could do an update a little down the line and just talk about how you feel about it after some time? love u dodie

I love Astrid so much 😂'can you catch me some pokeballs?' 😂😂

this made me cry oh god

I cried watching this, because I'm gonna be doing the same thing in a couple of months when my dad sells my childhood home.

I'm a REALLY sentimental person so when she threw that box in the fire I flinched. I actually jumped. I could never do that. I keep so much stuff that holds pointless memories, you are seriously incredible for throwing that away. Oh my god. x

I am incredibly proud of you Dodie. I watched this , you burning the notebooks, getting rid of lanyards and stuff and I realised how much stuff I have. I find it so hard. I crave a minimalist bedroom that has space to breathe but I can't bring myself to do it. I can barely throw out pens that I've had for years let alone get rid of old toys I don't use or old mementos. It's hard and I'm proud of you as a fellow sentimentalist to be able to do this. Tears are allowed.
I recently listened to "little room" again and I cried. I don't know why as I'm not moving out or anything and I know when it happens it won't be as bad because I've moved a lot throughout my life. However it's the idea of your heart being attached to objects , and I hate my reliance on objects to remember and find joy.
Dodie you bring me joy. Love you x

Oh Dodie I relate so much. When I was away at school my parents decided to sell the house (and get a divorce). It was so hard to go back and pack up all my things and know that my stable home which had always been there was no longer a place for me. This brought back all the feels. Good to know I am not the only person who gets unreasonably attached to material things. Thank you for your candidness, you are a lovely person.

Holy shit that entire box!! oh my god

Today I've gotten 4 different types of medicine and an inhaler from my doctor because I have a weak form of bronchitis (-ish I don't really know). I've taken all of the medicine for the first part of today (in which some pills are rhe same size as the tip joint of my pinky) and the medicine has made my heart race and my hands shake (which I don't like) but seeing this video made me calmer and less panicky. I love watching dodie and her videos, they always make me happy!🙂

DDOOODDDDIIIIIEEEE CLING ONTO THE FUTUREEEEEREEE I LOVE HOW SENTIMENTAL YOU ARE AND ITS OKAY TO CRY AND BE SENTIMENTAL (I know this isn't the right time but your vedif is like an extended snapchat in February) LOVE YOU DODIE

I so admire your willingness to step up and help your mam and Hedy out! Other people at this age may have taken the opportunity to be more independent and self-driven (which is okay it itself, it's just another way to handle things) travelling or cutting ties or whatnot. How amazing is it that you're not only maintaining such a strong relationship with your mam and Hedy, but also doing your share in supporting and "breadwinning" if you will. Such admiration for you, Dodie. You're doing incredibly.

I remember a year or so back when you were on tour (transatlantic tour) and you told us that your house was being sold and now it's actually being sold. I can tell this was hard for you, but I'm proud of you 💕💕💕 I worry now for how I'll deal with all this

Dodie thank you for sharing so much of your life with us it makes all of your videos that much more open and personal and makes it easier to connect with you <3

I'm going through the same thing right now. Last year was one of the absolute years of my life. I've grown apart from my mum so much and this video is a really good representation of how I feel. I've moved house several times, but this is by far the hardest. I'm just so conflicted and I can't even figure out everything I'm feeling I just kinda needed to dump this where no one will read it or see it or care but I'll have it written down

Totally get this feeling. My mum died suddenly a few years ago so I had to move out of my childhood home so quickly and unexpectedly and it was awful. I still technically own the house and rent it out to another family but I've only been back twice cause it's still painful. It doesn't feel like home anymore and just makes me sad, these situations suck.

For a moment at the end I was wondering who's voice is talking, but then I realized it was Hedi. Her voice is growing to sound so mature, it sounded so adult.

as hard as this must have been for you Dodie, I kinda wish I could do the same, but I've never had a place like this. I've moved so many times, and hated a lot of the places, so I've never had a house that felt like home. I've always had the feeling of escaping something whenever I move, which I don't mind. I get to start over a lot, and meet new people in new neighborhoods, but I still feel lost. I wish I had a place that I knew would be there, that was home to me. right now it's my school theatre, because of my lovely teacher and amazing friends I've made there, but its not really mine either.

I feel her so much. the fire tho'.. I just wouldn't be able to do it.

I’m a very sentimental person too. Every time I drive by my childhood home on Birchtree Avenue I still get a little emotional 😢

I'm 17 and I already cling onto every last bit of everything I've lived through because I can feel myself changing and I don't want to let go. Once I've moved out my parents want to take over my room, so I'll have to go through this same thing one day. I'm dreading the day.

You should've done a reprise of Little Room!! I would've literally been a puddle of tears 😭❤

You saying goodbye to your childhood home is reminding me of when my great grandma passed away and we had to sell her house. It wasn't just saying goodbye to my grandma or her house it was saying goodbye to my childhood and knowing that everything was gonna be so different from that point on. I remember on the last day of being in the house, while my family was packing up stuff. I just walked around the empty house crying and trying to get used to the fact that it won't be the same again. ❤️😭

is her hair flower dodie yellow? strikes me as also also not dodie yellow

I grew up in a military family, so for the first half of my life we moved every 9-15 months. I went to boarding school from the age of 8, then to uni, then I lived away from home. The closest thing I had to a solid base was my grandparents' house, where they'd lived for 48 years. But a few years ago they sold up to move in with my aunt.

Losing that closest thing to a home was really hard, so I can't imagine how much worse it was when it's where you actually grew up. Chin up, buttercup, everything will be ok. <3

I know how you're feeling. it's so so weird to just let go of everything that's familiar and it's all you've ever really known. and it's hard knowing that the memories are all in this place that is no longer yours. but make the new home your new familiar, and your new vision of "home-y" :) love you dodie, hang in there.

Home is where you feel safe and are surrounded by loved ones.Over our lifetime that physical location will change, but remember no incident or person can take away your home. You are its creator.

The feels. I would have just taken all my stuff to my new home, which is basically what I did when I moved out of home. Its bad but ya know, can't let go of the nostalgic feelies.

Omg that's the same garden from the ice bucket challenge video 😭

My home burnt down when I was 7 years old, just like that, withing an hour or so just four walls were left in its place. My base and everything inside was gone, and still is to this day.
Home for me is a feeling, not a place, home is wherever my family are! (as cliche as it sounds)
Love you Doodie. Happy VEDIF! (you gotta have a little rain in order to see a rainbow) xx

this took me way back from the old videos awe 💛

Its okay Dodie I just moved from my childhood home to another state it's was the best and worst thing that could happen! But now that I'm in my new house I know there will be new things to learn and experience. I was given great advice- hold on to memories because things are the only thing that can be taken away from you!☺️

Oh this is a very interesting video to watch, for me. I'm just like Dodie about being attached to the past, but it's more about the memories I hold in my brain.Me and family never had our own house. I've moved to 3 different cities in almost 19 years and 7 different houses, so that what she is feeling is a very strange thing to me. In anyway, change is always a good thing and it's like you're leaving pieces of yourself in every place you've been too, like you're everywhere and a part of everything. Might sound strange. Don't know why I'm commenting this lol

I LOVE YOU 😍😍😍

I've moved so many times I can't even count on one hand.
I don't think I've had a home for a long long time. Leaving my childhood was the worst moment of my life but it lead to the best times of my life.
Everything happens for a reason I guess

I had to leave my house recently and I'd lived there for 21 years. It was home and now it's not mine anymore. I'm no longer near my family and I miss them so badly. I'm sobbing now because this video is so relatable and I know exactly how this all feels, seeing your stuff thrown out and gone, leavingnfor the last time. It's hard

I want to reach through the screen and give you a massive hug :(

the view in your garden is so sick, like it's actually awesome I could totally chill there so hard

dodes do you want a hug

Dodie I love you <3

oh dodie :( this made me tear up, its too familiar. i remember leaving my childhood home after my parents divorced - it was so difficult because i'd never known anywhere else to be home. that was nearly 6 years ago, and since then i've had four additional moves. but, only really one of those were hard on me, because there i'd made a new home, and friends who loved me and a wonderful girlfriend who loved me, and leaving the place felt like i'd lost half my heart and only could be complete when i visited.. but all these moves have taught me that a house is just a mold and that the home is in the memories and the people you love. it won't ever be the easiest thing, leaving someplace dear to you, but it teaches you to adapt and makes you grow stronger. i think one of the plus sides is having something distinct that marks the next chapter/year of your life - when i think about my homes, i get distinct feelings and memories from each of them, and i like how its not all mushed together like the memories from my first home are
anyway, i love you dodie and you will get through this and it takes time but one day the new flat will feel warm, familiar, and comfortable - like home - to you

I moved when I was a young child, so moving out isn't hard, but I can see how it is. The objects and the people are my memories, not the place. Ya know?

you and your sis have such a close relationship its refreshing, my sister never really liked me so we never really bonded like you two

oh dodie

I know what it's like to lose your childhood home. I had to when I was 17 and it sucked. I had such a great childhood with great neighbors and it just felt like I wasn't going to have that anymore. And although it was true, I know in my heart it was for the best.

Noooo dodie :( I started crying when you put the box in the fire 😭💕

I'm tearing up watching this video because my grandparents moved house last summer and i didn't get to say goodbye to the house that felt like my second home and i'm kid of glad i didn't because i would have been a huge crying mess.
But when it comes to my family home I can't imagine not returning to the same place where so many big life events of mine happened.
I'm a huge hoarder of stuff and I would struggle with this as well as you are now. It's gonna hurt because like you I hold onto my past so dearly and hate change, but everything will be okay :)

I really like the fact that you say that hurting is good. It is! It really is. It sucks, but it always brings you further. (If you choose to look at it and acknowledge it, that is).

I hope you're doing OK, Dodie. Letting go of the past usually opens up space for new things.

Lots of love from a stranger. :)

Cutie patootie

One day in second grade I came home all of my family's stuff was in boxes and parents were like we're moving! They had never even mentioned it before that we were moving and I didn't think much of it then but now I realize that it probably wasn't the best way to leave a place.

the fact that you have a childhood home is nice, I've moved so many times that I don't have one

letting go of the past is never easy. i hope for you that the future will eventually bring you as much vivid joy as your past did. god knows you deserve it bby

I really liked how kind of old school this felt, I don't know if that's what you were going for but it made me feel even more touched by the story and as if you were being more honest somehow. I also really like the view over the fields from your back garden, so gorgeous!

Oh, dodes

I was just like this. Oh my days, this makes me feel so many things. I moved country for a year and that really helped, having two suitcases of things to my name, then when I got back I just wanted to get rid of everything. However, before getting rid of things I also scanned EVERYTHING. Letters, notes, cards, so they're on a huge hard drive. So the physical is gone, but just in case, I have something left.

This made me cry. I also am a very sentimental person. I cry over the smallest of things. Today I cleared out and changed my bedroom in my kinda crappy house and cried for a good half hour or so cause I found my stuff from primary school and last year - my first year at secondary school. I wanted to throw it away cause I needed the space so I started small and still have a long way to go but with everyone, we will get there. Anyway, I am legally allowed to move out in like 5 years but me and my family joke about it. I love living in our house and I don't wanna change anything. Seeing you burn your teenage years literally broke my heart and I'm so glad I have saved so much of my life so far. Good Luck Dodie and everyone else also going through change or a hard time I wish you well xx

i've moved house 14 times, i'm almost 15 years old. its hard to say goodbye but it's always gonna get better in the end. no matter what 💛

As someone who has moved house MANY times, I have to say it's always a bit weird/emotional. You sorta get to a point where the most important things, and the things that make a place 'yours', can fit into one box (especially if you do uni - you have a new room every year and not a lot of space to make it yours, so little things become important). I know it's a bit late giving you this advice now, but if in future you have to do something like this, go through and digitise as much as you can. Take photos of things, scan pages and postcards and letters, then name the files and keep them in a safe spot on your laptop/in the cloud. Digital files, be they in the cloud, on a laptop or an external hard drive or a USB stick, take up a lot less space, and still provide you with those memories <3

I get a vEdiF oN My biRTHDaY

oh bless you dodie it's gonner be ok, sending you a big cuddle xx

I relate a lot to your being stuck in the past and some of the things that stuck with me were "it's like getting rid of the last bit of before" like I've felt shit a year, almost two and I felt like after I'd felt like that a year I couldn't get back to the "before" also your mums advice helped me lol thank u mumma dodie xxxx

I'm saying goodbye to my home soon too. I've lived here for my entire life (almost 21 years) and in two or three weeks we'll all be moving (my mum and her bf getting a house together). I've been a complete wreck because of this for a couple of months, which hasn't made my mental health any better. Goodbyes are horrible, especially when you're saying goodbye to your entire past, every memory and the one place in the entire world that feels like home. I'm honestly scared I'll never feel at home ever again. So I feel you Dodie. hugs

I have almost an opposite effect from the past as I can't remember the last time I was happy. I know I was but I just don't know what it felt like. Dodie just know that the past is a chapter of your life book and it was written so wonderfully but you'll never be able to finish this beautiful book if you just keep re reading that chapter. Sure this chapter isn't the same but it's beautiful in a different way.

Is it a bad time to tell you storage units exist?

this is a gorgeous video x

DODIE!! I know I can´t give you a hug, but let´s pretend! hugs Dodie (:

i would have been a mess if i were you. i'm so attached to past it's ridiculous, i'm so nostalgic it requires counselling. stay strong you guys :)

this is so sweet, I relate to much eeeeehh!!!

yall STILL playing pokemon go?

A couple years ago when I was 16 we sold my childhood home...it was such a weird feeling because I'd never lived anywhere else. It's funny how one place becomes your whole world...its just all you know.

awh dodie for some reason this video really got to me because im at the very beginning of a similar situation, and watching this caused me to shed a few tears. broke my heart a little bit

im so like you. im way to nostalgic for my own good. its terrible, i always live in the past. I moved out of my family home 1.5 years ago after living there my whole life, 19 years. Im now 20 and it was pretty awful to begin with but i've adjusted now and feel ok about it. It gets better:)

I know how this feels like. I left my childhood place, the place where I spent 16 years growing up, and moved to another country (I moved to my country i.e. India, but I wasn't born OR brought up there) and I STILL feel like I can't let go after 5 years of saying goodbye. I remember bottling up and shutting down and hiding whatever I felt using humour, but 2 years in and I broke. That combined with the new school and new routine and what college to pick gave me, what I've recently realized it to be, depression. it sucks

OH

It's interesting to see the different viewpoints of Mother and Daughter because literally, everything your mum said would've bee something my mum said TO A T if I was getting upset or sentimental about something. I think it just goes to shows that as you're younger, everything is so new and fresh it's incredibly easy to attach yourself to the past, especially if it's your childhood home. Even if it doesn't mean anything anymore it still means (or meant) something to you and it's unfair to just assume that those feelings will just go away with the snap of your fingers. These things take time to heal from which I hope you eventually did and If so I am so happy for you, but the contrast of Mother and Daughter is simply strange but a marvel to look at as parents tend to be a lot of logical or level headed when letting go of the past, or at least they try to be.

this made me feel sad. I'm going to be saying good bye to the house that I have lived in my whole life because I'm moving down south in the summer

You seem like me before my citalopram, highly emotional over little things, and easily to cry.

in a way, i know exactly what you're going through. i moved away from my home about a year and a half ago and i was devastated. i didn't want to say goodbye, much like you. while, we didn't burn our things, we got rid of many things, and it felt like a piece of me was gone. i didn't want to say goodbye. it was our home for a good 10 years. a wonderful 10 years. and while the home wasn't as shitty as yours, not that it looked shitty in the video, just that you mentioned it was. anyway, i get that its not the things in the home you're going to miss. because they are just things. but some where, and some how, this house, will always be home. that home made me feel safe. and calm and i wanted to be there all the time. i still want to be there. we still own our home from where we moved from, just because no a lot of people are moving to where we live, and my parents are talking about selling it someday. i don't want they too. i want it. i want to live in it again. but i can't. its hard.

Yay

its so hard trying to part with memories and i wouldnt even be able to vlog because change is so hard but you are so stronge and you help us so much we want to do the same

We love you, dodie.

After I watched this video yesterday my mother called me to tell me they've just got home from an appointment with an architect to discuss the impending demolishment of the house I lived in for 20 years. They want to rebuild it into flats. My mum already told me to get rid of anything I don't need when I visit next. My heart is broken. My dad and granddad built that house, and I'm not okay. I moved out a year ago but it's gonna take a while until I accept this :(

But as with you, onwards and upwards! x

i had to do something like this when i ran away from my abusive mom's house almost a year ago. i only was able to pack one suitcase and one duffel bag full of stuff, and it was really hard to sort through all of the things i had accumulated in that house after seventeen years, especially the objects that brought be comfort when my mother was tormenting me. but after leaving, i did feel "lighter" like you said in this video, and it made me learn that i don't need to physically still have an object to keep the memories associated with it.
best of luck with everything, and i hope you feel better soon ❤❤❤

1 view and 69 likes.. wow

so proud of you, dodie! i hate to see you sad, but i know you'll be doing well in no time. i can't even begin to fathom how difficult this must be for you. happy vedif! all the love xx

My parents moved from my childhood home last year... to 1300 miles away and I still cry about it sometimes. While it is incredibly difficult losing that place you can call "home", you will never lose the times you had there. It may sound cliché, but it's still very true.

This hit me a lot harder than I thought it would. We (being my parents and I) have to move out of our house. The only place I have ever called home. The only place I have ever lived in. And the thing is - I can't ever come back to it once it's done. Because we have to knock everything down. They (being the town I live in) need the ground for flooding purposes. I mean this house isn't great. It's old and we only use half of it because the other half got destroyed when the big flood in 2013 happened. I KNOW this house isn't great. But it's my home. My only home that I have. Everything that has happened in my life - the good and the bad, the friendships and the break-ups, the laughter and the tears - happened here.
I have to leave a lot of things behind as well and I honestly don't know if I'm stong enough for it. I can't even write this without crying. You are so strong Dodie. At the moment I wouldn't be able to get out of here. I need more time. That I don't have. The only good thing is that we are gonna build a new house. A new home. But I just know it's not going to be the same. Maybe that is a good thing. I don't know yet. But I'm gonna find it out soon :')

Change is sometimes a good thing although your Brain is saying no right now it's because your brain is use to a certain pattern but once your brain accepts the new change it will get easier and it will get bette, hope your okay love you xx 💗

I'm so early

ahahhdhs i actually cried with you when you had to burn that box of old school things because i know how much it would make me cry if i had to just throw everything away. i hoard memories too and it'd kill me if i ever had to do that. im proud of you dodie 💛💛💛

I'm glad she recorded it. We're all so lucky to live in an age where we can digitise memories so we don't have to keep the physical stuff. It's helped me a lot because I've been purging out my room. I've still kept sentimental stuff but only the things that hold a really important place in my heart. Otherwise I will take a picture if needed and throw it away. For anyone who does have to clean out their home, record it and take objects that mean a lot but you can't take with you and record you holding it and talking about what it makes you remember. Sometimes even taking the picture or making the video will help you remember t more even if you never look at it again.

i'm like that! i keep everything because of the memories attached to them. that must have been hard for you to throw it on the fire.

That is the hardest thing. I'm with you. I still have all my old papers and notebooks and photos from high school in my parents home. I know eventually I have to get rid of it all but I just can't think of it actually happening. A box of happiness. I totally feel that.

Dodes I'm having a bad day 😕💕

This made me cry so hard because I had to do the same thing just a couple months ago

I'm a cancer. Giving up nostalgic objects is literally the hardest thing i could ever do, but honestly it helps so much because I've found its harder to create and explore a new me without doing that. So i'm glad you let yourself give up things in exploration of a new Dodie and i hope everything works out. :)

Aww I understand how difficult that must be, I left so many things behind when I moved out and I never went back to get anything, it was all thrown away. I didn't leave the first house I lived in in a good place. See, I can't even call it my home, it wasn't my home for a long time before I moved out.

Im really proud of you Doddie that you decided to stop drinking this month, because a lot of people, myself included, drown our sorrows in alcohol. I too am a sentimental person and DREAD the day I will have to get rid of my childhood things.

This video felt like it gave me a big family hug in a way. You can literally picture so easily the joy that happened in that house years ago. When she was talking about Alice come ing around and music in the summer. And the convos you're having is JUST SO WARMING I LOVE THE CLARKS

Oh gosh I'm crying. I still live in my childhood home, but I had another home like place, my grandparent's house, and a few years after my grandfather died, my grandma decided to sell the house, and I never got a formal goodbye to the house that was like a second home to me, and wow this video just brought all that back, and it's been about 5 years since all that happened.

I relate so much to your reluctance to let go of the past. I obsessively try to keep memories, mainly through journaling and pictures. I don't have derealisation or anything like that but I am also incredibly nostalgic. It seems trivial looking back on it now, but when I was 14 we moved like a half mile away from our old house and at first I was devastated, because a lot of aspects of my life were changing then and it felt like one too many. The physical existence of that house felt so important. Now, after four years, I love our new house and can't imagine going back to the old one. We never throw anything away though so I was really proud of you and inspired when you got rid of your old stuff. I hope I can be strong enough to do that with some of my stuff in the future.

It's weird because I just started going through the process of leaving home and while I have the worst memories of abuse and hardship, but it's really the only place I've known. I had a sanctuary in my room will walls filled with inspiration and art and I had to pack it all away, and the stuff that didn't fit got thrown away. I was never old enough to remember what any of this was like growing up, I moved a lot but not recently enough to remember how it feels. It didn't feel real until yesterday when I got a call that I could leave next week. I hadn't cried until then. I don't have advice unfortunately and I don't know the circumstances, but I can promise you that you aren't alone in shedding tears for the past. I mean, at one point it was all we had.

youre very brave, dodie!

First/early squad... sorry lol

i honestly loved this video so much

After my parents sold my childhood home (without warning me), I refused to throw anything away, so now their new place has an entire room full of my childhood stuff.

Dodie, you're such a strong person! I know what it's like to lose it all, but just remember crying is okay, it's what makes us human, it's what shows we truly care and if we didn't show emotion then that would be the point?? Just remember, here's to new beginnings and opportunities girl, Were all here to listen even if we are just words on a screen we care about you and your family dearly, and I'm so glad that I found your channel 2 years ago, I've seen you grow as a person, mentally, physically and I've seen your channel grow, from 10 the zeroes just kept adding on, and I feel this year you will reach a million subscribers, you're so close! And girl let me tell you you deserve it, everything you've been through, all your stories are heartwarming and heartbreaking, you bring tears to your audiences eyes in good and bad ways, And Hedy and Astrid have grown so much too, Hedys got her own channel, she's getting better at ukulele and drawing every day, and Astrid, being the most gracious, beautiful mother, she always has the right advice for you all, she's grown on the YouTube community as much as you and Hedy have, and Astrid, Hedy, Dodie, and even Ian, if you read this, You guys are the most beautiful family on YouTube ❤️❤️

I I completely relate to this strong nostalgia. I have a memory box in my bedroom and as I'm approaching the last few months of school I've looked through it several times just to remember. It doesn't help that I forget things easily so can't help feeling scared I'll forget all the good times.I'll actually be going off t university in the latter part of 2017, I'm so very excited but it also terrified the crap out of me... To leave the people I see every day and the school I've shared so many of my memories with since I was 4... That'll be hard ... But we'll both get through it. Best of luck to you, lots of love xx

"6 views"

Love you dodie

i think this is honestly my favorite video of yours

This made me smile and cry a little

Aww dodie... I remember when I was younger (grade 4) me and my family were moving to a different city/town and I was so sad. My friend was also moving, but across the country so that made it worse. But the thing is she was so excited and I was crying. 😐

8 views
652 likes
youtube go home you're drunk

This is so interesting, because I moved constantly as a child. Where my parents live is what I consider 'home' I think in the same way you considered this house 'home'.

Dodie, you did it and we are all hear for you as a pal. All of us can relate to this in some way or another and we all know how hard this is for you. You can and will recover. Stay strong little bean xxx

OMG I TOTALLY CRIED AT THIS 😭😭😭

i really liked watching this. i tend to like documentary-style content and the reality dodie showed us was oddly calming despite the emotional turmoil she was going through. ummm idk what i'm trying to say but basically as a viewer this was pleasant and good, but i definitely am not trying to make light of the video's topic.

I moved from my childhood home (though ya know I was still a kid but anyway) interstate ( I'm Australian) and over a bit of ocean, away from all my friends and family. It was horrible, especially since we built the house and planted every last tree. Now, as much as I miss the land and the smell of the grass, I actually miss my childhood more; I was so happy, I had all my friends. I loved the house and everything, and my first year here was terrible, but I miss being little. I miss my little brother being little. I miss the past.
I get what you mean about not missing the place, but the memories and time spent there. It's pretty hard saying goodbye to a wall covered in measurements of your height since you could stand.

I lived in my childhood home from when I was about a month old until I was 18. I'm 22 now. My dad's job transferred him. I had never spent a single day away from my mom or brother in my entire life, and suddenly we were separated. I was at my aunt's house cause I needed to finish school, my brother was like an hour away at his school, my parents were in another state, my dog was at a different aunt's house, and my childhood home was on the market. it was one of the hardest days of my life. this was about three years ago. at the moment I feel like I don't have a home, because their house in another state doesn't feel like home. it feels temporary and not mine. but we've all adjusted, and save for the odd emotional drunken night or tough/scary situation, I'm okay. you'll be, too :)

really enjoyed this vlog!

I've been told I'm a very sentimental person. I still haven't gotten over a friend I had a fight with from three years ago and still have the necklace she made me. I can't stand throwing away things from the past and I always criticized myself for being so sentimental, but seeing that I'm not the only one with this struggle makes me feel a little better. I'm proud of you for moving on from the old house, and speaking of which, maybe I should get on cleaning out some of my stuff too :P

I didn't realize it at first, but when I though about it this relates so much to me. My family just recently moved out of my family home and even though I had already moved out for college I never felt like my dorm was home, I always felt like my home back home was home and now it's gone and honestly I just don't think about it because if I do it makes me sad and I don't like that. And I had to clean out my room as well and I hoard all my stuff and hate to let things go and it was so hard for me, my mom and grandma literally had to just through stuff away for me because I couldn't do it myself. So I hope you get through this and find yourself a new home, because right now I honestly don't feel like I have one.

THIS VIDEO ACTUALLY MADE ME CRY

I'm in my second year of university now. and we moved house away from my 'childhood home' (which I had lived in from the age of 5 until I was 13/14) and it was horrible Despite moving around many times after moving out of there for the first time, and despite the horrible, but great memories my first house had, I will always think of that house when I think of my home. at least until I 'settle down' somewhere after university. I related to this video so much, especially when you were going past the skip and throwing things on the fire with memories from school life. I would love to go back to my childhood house at some point in my future life, because I cycle past it occasionally and it makes me so happy and warm. ≤3

I too left my childhood home.... this video hurt to watch because it brought back the memories of leaving the home i thought would never leave. No matter how long i live in this new house it'll never be my h o m e

while watching this video i realised that i might never feel this ever or at least not until i'm much much older. for my whole life i've moved around i don't really have a home. of course its plenty hard to move from place to place every 2 or 3 years, but when i get there i already know that what i'm building here is temporary. i can't decide whether my constantly changing life is a blessing or a burden.

Your mom is incredible

This was posted on my birthday a couple years back. The last year I lived in my home. The last year I lived with all my memories

your mum is actually the best :)

isn't it weird, just to see a house like that, just empty without the furniture and decor and photos, all the memories. I have recently been helping my family move stuff out of my grandpas house (he passed recently) and it's just so weird because the house was always so full and warm but now seeing it empty with everything gone it's so weird it's so open and dark, at first I was very sad ( I still am) I'm saying goodbye to a huge part of my childhood, but now as I write this in this moment I realize, it's just a house, a shell, it's what's inside that matters, and we're whats inside, my family marked that place forever. we made it a home. so it's just a house, but all the marks, dents, scratches, stickers, that's what made it a home. and now we get to do it again, find another house and turn it into a home.

dodie, thank you so, so much for being honest about your home -- that it's not necessarily perfect. i know that's not the point of this video, but as somebody who grew up in a tiny little house with a single mother with mental health issues that stopped her from doing any cleaning at all, thank you for being the honest voice i needed. i've never ever seen anybody admit to having a less-than-clean house. family issues are represented and messy bedrooms are represented, and that's all great, but a properly dirty/messy house is a lot to admit to; it feels somehow like a failure on my part, something shameful, you know? but listening to you talk about your (old) house, and the good things in yours and your family's futures just make me so, so happy. thank you, dodie

I burst out crying when I saw her throw her memories in the fire
I can't imagine doing that
I'm still in high school and I have a few bins full of yearbooks and pen pall letters and bloody hell I just can't imagine how hard that would be
I agggh I wouldn't be able to let go of the past

i always watch your videos with earl grey with two sugars and a glump of milk. and the teabag's in.

watching this was so fucking hard!!
I wanna give you a hug.
I haven't thrown away my school books for the same reason.
I was happy but also, they come in handy.

I know it hurts now, but trust me, everything will feel so much better when you're in your cute little house your mam and hedy <3 (tell them I say hi? xx)

i cried soo much watching this oMg Im stUpid someone stop me... this is just my biggest fear and you handled it so well, im so proud and i wish i could do the same!

We are so proud of you duuudz

dodieee your house is so beautiful :''') the view out my window is a dirty fire escape lol

Good luck you pretty sunflower<3

Seeing Dodie cry and be sad makes me die a little inside

I was crying as I watched this. My parents got divorced when I was younger and we moved away from the county. A few months ago we went back to visit family and my brother and I dragged our mom to the house. It was all over grown. Homeless people had taken it over. Looking through the windows, I found the inside to be graffitied, destroyed. My home. My home. My childhood. All gone. and I'm so sad and angry. As you were burning all those things, I began to cry, and found myself begging you not to do it. I just want to wrap myself in the past, in my own naivety. Thank you for sharing this Dodie. It was horrible to watch. It made me sad. But thank you.

I have to say the backyard furniture fire was my fav part of this video! Such a funky surprise

I understand, I had to say goodbye to the house I grew up in about a year and a half ago. Despite having already moved out 4 years previously, it was still hard.

1:09 dodie's having an emotional moment and her mum says all the right things and then adds on the end, oh by the way can you get some pokeballs for me. what an icon, i'm unstanning dodie and stanning dodies mum instead lmao

I actually shed tears because I can relate to this on so many levels. this summer we're suppose to sell my grandma's/family house which holds so many memories of mine and even though I didn't exactly grow up there, I can almost remember my whole childhood from just looking at that house. it won't even feel like I'm leaving it behind, but I'll feel like I'm saying good-bye to everything else, to 'little-me'. I dunno know if that even makes sense, but I'm sensitive to the topic and I wanted to tell you dodie that you're not alone.

momma dodlie is so sweet and sympathetic, she reminds me of my mum,, please give her a hug for me

Thank you..... just thank you, for making this video

I moved from my proper childhood home when I was 11. I'm 21 and it still feels weird lol

strangely enough, my parents decided to move out last week and now that im seeing this im so emotional already wtf

I cried a bit... I'm as well so sentimental with places and things, I can understand your sadness :')

When you put your old things on the fire and just stand there all quiet you don't know how much I simply want to give you the biggest hug possible. Honestly I feel sad when your sad :(( I just want to give ya a lil hug just because:)

I want to reach through the screen and give you a hug!

I lived in England from age 10 to 17. I left this April, and had to shove everything of mine, all my memories, an entire seven years, into two suitcases. It broke my heart; I had to throw out so much and I couldn't even.

I miss it so much, it's my home and being away for so long is so hard. All of my friends are there, and my fiancé. I have nothing here, and it kills me.

This is a good thing. I'll probably have to take a month off when my parents move. They've kept so much.

Going through the exact same thing right now, but I'm more of Hedy's pov. My parents got a divorce two years ago and the house has been for sale. It's an amazing house though and I always absolutely loved it, although I already said goodbye with the divorce because it no longer had the magic and good memories it once did. And then I moved out and said goodbye, but now that it's sold it's more like saying goodbye to the part of me and the life that I had in the house, and the feelings it held, and its solidity just by existing and being where I came from. It's a different kind of goodbye.

I moved house when I was 13 (I'm 19 now) and honestly I still don't feel like my 'new house' is home which I know is silly I've lived here for years but my old room is still where I wish I could run too when I'm having a bad day. It was perfect and it was home it smelt like home and now this one still doesn't and I'm not sure how to deal with it. I guess I've just suppressed everything and watching this has made me admit I feel things still....

I've been gradually doing this for years, I'd managed to accumulate so much stuff at each of my parents houses. I've still got a few things to sort out but I find it quite therepeutic to throw things away. Decluttering my life makes me feel really good, but I'll admit I don't think I could burn anything, though I probably should with my uni notes because it's been over 4 years and I've not looked at them since graduating...

that was immense bloody courage to burn that box. im proud dodes.

I love this so much

I'm afraid for letting go in the future. I hoard so many memories and pictures I don't think I'd ever be able to get rid of those memories.

Videos with you and Hedy make me want to be closer with my sister (she's 26 and I'm about 15). I see her every couple of years (I live in the US and she grew up and currently lives in another country). I've never felt really attached to a house and when need to say goodbye to something or need advice it's hard to get a hold of her because she's a busy adult in London. Idk why I needed to say that but I needed to get it out I guess lolokbye

Your Mum is so sweet! I hoarder a lot of memories but I hope to make some sort of art with it... Probably going to burn it in a few years if we're honest :D

Oh my, I know this is a silly thing to comment on but it almost made me tear up when your mum asked you to do the Pokestop for her, because whenever I'm in the car with my mum she always asks me to catch the Pokemons and do the Pokestops for her!
:') It's our thing and I loved it so much to see that it's also a thing with you and your mum!

It's so funny that you posted this video today, because last night I had a dream that I got to go back to my old childhood home that I lived in for 18 years, and live there again. I moved in August, and it wasn't easy, and it still makes me sad to think about it (which is weird because as you said, it's a house, and mine was also full of crap), but it was a sign of safety and support. It gets easier, and it feels more like a distant memory, but it can still definitely be difficult. I doubt anyone will really read this, which is fine, but I just wanted to say to hang in there, and that throwing away things that symbolized your happiness was really incredible.
Much love, Dodie <3

My childhood home has my dad's new family in it, and I was just told to pack the stuff I wanted to keep before he chucked it all and the kids moved in.

Funny story...
When I was fourteen, my family moved out of the house that they had for thirty years. We were all crying and I looked like a mess on the way out. I looked at the marker marks on the wall from my height throughout the years, and I was crying so hard. Two days had past since we moved out of the house, then we get a call from the person that bought it from us. Turns out we forgot to empty a cupboard in the kitchen full of mugs, so we had to go back and get our stuff. I went back in, and I started crying again, while the new owner just looked at me like I was an idiot XD

Stay strong, you will feel better after time.

this is so the opposite of me, i wish i could be more sentimental like you

I recently had to move house too.. my gran died and my mum wanted to keep her house so we moved into it but it didn't make moving out of my old house any easier. I'd lived there for over 6 years and the amount of memories I've made in that house made it so hard to just pack everything and see my house empty and ready for someone else to make their memories there. In my bedroom. I'm still not really over it tbh and I haven't cried about it since we moved out nearly 6 months ago but I can't do anything about it which is why thinking about it breaks my heart a bit..

what interesting colour grading you did dodie!

Oh I cried watching this because it made me think of when I said goodbye to my childhood home

Today I was on FaceTime with my friend, and somehow, we both ended up showing each other our old baby photos. At first it was funny, a way to take the piss out of each others foetus faces 😂 But then I found a box of old photos, inside of which was a book my Mum had made to document the first 7 years of my life. When looking through it, I was suddenly overwhelmed but so many memories I didn't even know I had anymore. Then came the big hit. At the bottom of this box was a diary I'd kept a few years ago, and inside were little stories I'd written to cope with the mess my brain had been in at the time, and reading them back out loud on FaceTime to my best friend in the world suddenly opened up a door I had shut long ago, and all the crap came tumbling out. For a few moments, I didn't know what to do, how to cope, but then I heard my friend say 'Read it out, to me, then close the book, and put it back in the box.' And I did, and it was hard, and horrible. But now I'm lying in bed, the box is back on the shelf, and although it contains thousands of memories and thoughts and emotions, I know that I won't open that box for years to come, and by coming to terms with that, looking back, I think I'm okay with that. I can move on.

Dodie, what you did today must have been unimaginably difficult. You hate change, and I completely understand that. I find the hardest thing to do is let things go, it's the worst feeling in the world. But you know what?? If you can do that, everything will be okay, and one day you'll look back, without even realising, almost by accident, and discover you've moved on. And the weirdest part will be when you realise, you really are okay with that, and you're better for it.

Dodie you're an inspiration, I hope you're doing okay. Smile! ☺️

- Meg Xxxxxxx

I need to do this. I am almost 27 and I have kept everything from my last 27 years being alive. I just touch these things and I immediately start crying because I think of all the things I wanted to do and still haven't because my anxiety gets in the way. It makes me sad and I don't think I need those reminders of what could have been. I just have so much stuff and it's borderline hoarding.

I still haven't said goodbye, I want to... but I'm forced to go back and get the feels multiple times a year, even though it's filled with terrible memories from the more recent past there are also those amazing memories from when I was a toddler and going through elementary school...

I said goodbye to the house I remember growing up in for 16 years and that just sucked because my dad died while I lived in that house so it was like I was saying goodbye to his memory and presence there. However I am very happy where I am now so it was an overall win. The shock of it kind of sucked but you move forward and it's good.

this was painful because i identify so much, the idea of losing my home and having to get rid of my memories TERRIFIES me - hope you're alright <3

I relate so much!! currently moving house both parents are moving that means 2 houses to declutter and say goodbye too :(

im going off to college soon and once i leave my home is immediately going up for sale because my dad works somewhere else and my mom wants to move back in with him. i think i'll feel a lot like you feel now. the home i live in currently is the first home i was able to grow up in, so its kind of hard to think i'll eventually take my last steps out of that house and never come back. im excited to go off to school, itll just be weird not spending holidays there or seeing my friends during breaks. honestly seeing you do this made me feel strangely okay. maybe its just seeing you move on from the past and still being able to say goodbye at the end if the video. it makes me feel like everything is gonna work itself out, even if it isnt great currently.

This is honestly my worst nightmare watching you go through this made me cry. I'm a hoarder, I hate change and I don't even know how you managed it so well. I know I'm gonna have to do it at some point too but I refuse at this point to get rid of as much stuff as you had to. I know that's not healthy but I don't care it's honestly a nightmare thinking about it.

this is really lovely

I cried when she lit the box

Dammit Dodie this made me cry so much

Explanation (just me ranting) : I'm going through the exact same thing except I only lived in the house until I was nine and then that got me to thinking why it made me so upset if it was years ago. Then I realized that I was always happy there and because we moved I had to start changing myself to fit in and became someone that I really grew to hate. Luckily I am going back to who I really am but it's just really upsetting that I won't be able to go back to the place where I was so out going and happy.

I know that so well!! My dad used to live in a big house with a huge garden and a lot of animals living in it where I spent half of my childhood. It really was a magical place. When my stepmother died we had to give away the house and most of the animals which was soo so hard! I also lost most of my old toys and books and stuff. I just can't imagine another family living there. I can't drive past the house and see cars I don't know without hurting. Not all memories are good, so that makes it difficult in a different way... All those memories feel so unreal now? But yeah I GET YOU. YOU'RE SO STRONG.

I'm so surprised how easily u talk about what exactly is bothering you to your family, like I just cringe whenever I gotta talk about feelings to my parents. I admire that about you

Saying goodbye to a home, a place where so many memories were made is literally the worst. I recently said goodbye to my grandparents house as they needed somewhere smaller and easier to use. It wasn't were I grew up, it was my mum's house, but it still stung to pack away the toys we played with there or clean the office we used to make our pretend radio show in. It hurt and I cried and I hurt. I wanted to keep every little memory I had from a sheet of paper I drew on when I was 5 to a giant piano (to be fair we did end up taking the piano).
Moving on sucks, but sometimes it's for the best and I suppose we just need to accept that and keep living on our lives.

Though I lost my childhood home when I was 5 I get that it's upsetting. The place I've lived since hasn't felt like a home. But my mum is my home so while moving out (when I finally find the money bc my dad won't help for shit) I'll miss her, not the house. I'll miss my mother and brother bc I have lived with them my whole life and it has always been us three since the divorce (well tbh before). As different as my brother and I are and as much as we annoy each other I know I'll miss him when I move elsewhere. I think that's what will be hard for me. I used to miss my childhood home but the more I got to know my father and how he had hurt us the more I want to forget that home. It holds so many bad memories even though I remember little from it. I know my family was treated like shit in that house and that's why I am glad I don't live there anymore. I would like to visit the neighbourhood one more time though.

Thoughts i'll give if you're moving: if you have the option to go back to a place that you were comfortable in or loved when you know it will have changed, you can decide. I went back to my childhood home and it had exit signs, new floors, different furniture, and i wanted to get out. But that helped me loosen hold of that place and come to terms with change. I have only seen the outside of my teenage home, and while it has drastically changed it didnt feel personal at all. Just my two cents, you can decide :)

This made me cry because my family and I are moving out of my home of eleven years and I don't want to leave

Ahhh Dodie I did the exact same damn thing like two months ago :( it sucks ass, to be quite honest. I always thought my childhood home would be there to welcome me back, even though it wasn't a happy childhood and I wasn't a joyful child like you, I still wanted it to be there. I'd painted on my walls and had my friends all sign a cloud on the wall and the pieces of clay and stretchy hands my brother and I had gotten stuck to the ceiling were still there and I could walk through it with my eyes closed in the dark and know where I was. It wasn't a home though, not really. It didn't make me happy at the end, it was just the home of a terrible divorce that had been a long time in the making and a lot of sadness and stress, overwhelming stress. It still is awful though, throwing out your childhood things, notebooks and pictures you don't need but love looking back at. But now I have a home and it's not what I thought and it's not what I would've picked but it's a real home with my mom and a room that makes me happy and countless plants and my big fat cat. I hope you find a home soon ❤ (lol now I'm gonna cry)

:( we are selling my old house that I grew up in and I visited it today and I started to cry. Then I remembered this video and now I'm crying again

Another thing, losing a house is like losing a loved one, the pain never truly goes away, you repress it. but you smile because of the memories you made there with amazing people.

I'm probably moving out in about a years time and leaving everything and everyone I've ever known behind, and it's quite sad. It's like an impending doom waiting to happen. I've always lived in this house, I love it, and I'd like never leave and get a job in town, but I know I'd be missing out on so many opportunities. There's less than a thousand people living in a ten kilometer radius, so we don't have a lot of ''fun'' things in town.

It's really weird, but I'd like to live in a town or city big enough to at least have a tattoo parlor or an arcade or something, I think that would be a lot of fun, especially the arcade.

Nervous as heck and I'll probably have a panic attack the day I leave, but also at least a bit excited.

watching you throw that box on the fire was really hard. God I
can't even explain why but my heart hurt and the tears were.flowing.. like you say.. it's so easy to cry.

I am a hoarder, like majorly. But the one thing my dad always says that rings so true it makes me cry is that the things aren't the memories. The objects or the place or the person, thats not the memory. The memory is what we hold inside our head and our heart. It's the emotion we feel when we remember, its the picture inside of us. Not an object.
Sending love you're way <3

I moved out of my family home on the first of December 2014. We then moved back in from April 2016- late august 2016. When we had our last night there I cried and cried and cried. That place is still my home, and it's strange to think that there is a little girl sitting in my room on the bench by my window and climbing up the apple trees and playing the Wendy house. That place is the best house in the world. I want to live in no other place, but because I'm still a child I have no say. Every night I miss it. Every day I think back longingly to home, and it's so vivid, like I was there only 2 hours ago. But then I'll open my eyes and see my bright new bedroom, and remember that they own it now. And it's not ours to do what we want to it. I hate them. But I can't do anything and I wish more then anything to be back there now. Sorry for the ramble

the way she talks on the verge of tears made me so sad dODIE STOP;-;💞

As a person who has lived in 13 houses before I turned 18, it's really weird for me that people would be upset about leaving a house. I can't wrap my head around someone being upset that a house isn't there anymore. I have things from each house and the memories but I have no feelings about the houses themselves.

i love the raw editing style of this video..and i love your mum for playing pokemon go xo

Change is a large part of my life. My parents are in the millitary and we move every 2 years at most. I am happy I will never have to experence this. (Loosing a childhood home, i mean). I've had 15 homes in my 13 year life, so I'm used to change. Honestly can't live without it. I give you the best of luck getting over this hard time. Much love.

When I was 10 and I had to move from my childhood home that held so many good memories in it into a new house that was so strange and the first year and a half we lived in the new house (our current house) I had nightmares and night terrors and I became depressed and angry at everything and sad and etc, I've made a lot of bad memories in this house and I think back to the memories in the old house and how nice is it was and when my parents were still happy together and yeah. I've suffered from depression and anxiety for a long time now and I've been going to therapy for about 4 years now and I'm okay now, I'm in a good place (I'm now a freshmen in High school) and I have loving family and friends that who care and love me. (Sorry this is so long, just wanted to share my experience(: )

this is scarily relatable. my mom is also moving right now. and like i barely live there anymore but it's super scary and weird

I relate so much to you dodie I experience dissociation and have had family issues (probs why I have it) it scares me that I can't remember the last time I felt I was really here and not floating around like I'm trapped in jelly lol I rlly hope things will get better for you! fingers crossed for tha both of us :-))

I don't think my parents are planning on moving out of the one and only home I've ever known...but if they ever do. Oh dear. <3

Your Mum was sounding all wise and grown up and then, "Could you get some pokeballs for me?" Honestly just like my Mum haha

Oh my god, I could never burn my journals, this is almost actually painful D:

This actually made me cry

I'm now in my teenage years but I've already said goodbye to two childhood homes. The first I honestly can't remember because was three but my mum still has pictures of me there so I don't feel sad, I feel happy. The second one however has probably been the worst experience of my life. No joke. Maybe it was my headspace during the time we moved (my parents had just divorced and we were selling the house because I was moving with my dad up to Kent (where I live now)) I think it also made it worse because all the seven years I lived there I was remembering everything, even now I can look at something and remember a time I was in my room. I think I made it worse for myself though, because I always think of ideal paths in my life and don't like thinking about the negatives, when a negative does happen, I AM NOT prepared. I sometimes hole myself up and don't eat properly when something bad happens (thank god nothing has happened recently) but because of that I thought that 'this will always be my home' 'this is the one place I can always count on being there' ect. That was all destroyed so quickly and that made t worse. I'm not really sure what the point of this was but I think I'm trying to say, that sometimes saying goodbye is one of the hardest things a person can do, but because it's so hard, it's ultimately better for that person. While I'm still sad about my old home not being there, I try to remember of all the really good memories and instead of feeling sad someone else lives there now, I feel happy because they will hopefully experience the same joy I did.

Wow that was really long it was only meant to be 4 sentences whoops.

Home is where your heart is

THIS MADE ME TEAR UP AND IT ISN'T EVEN MY HOME OMG

This video hit me so hard, I am currently crying, because I'm the same way. I absolutely hate change, keep all of my old notebooks and doodles, and random crap, and even thinking about having to leave my childhood home when I'm older will destroy me. Completely destroy me emotionally. Ugh... I just... Uh

Okay but where has Hedy been? I want more of her videos too.

So I moved out almost three years ago now from my childhood home. My mom stayed for a couple of months to sell the place while I moved 500 miles away with my dad. It was very hard for me to say goodbye because I spent 14 out of my 16 years of existence there. I recently learned that the people living there now are renting it out and I'm very tempted to rent it for a bit with my four siblings but of course that is ridiculous. I had so many amazing memories in that house and spent the best years of my life there. I really hope that things turn out for the better and that I will feel the same about this house in the future.

i would never be able to throw out all my old notebooks and stuff, seriously well done

The little flower in dodie's hair is so cute.

okay so... i can sympathise with you very much because i am constantly trying to get back a feeling from the past and trying to relive it and it's horrible sometimes but sometimes i get like a little deja vu and it lasts for a second but it means so much to feel it again. my fixation is on 2017; that year means so much and i know i'll never feel the entirety of it but watching your videos from 2017 helps so much so i guess thank you! so much thank you <3

This made me sad :(( it reminded me of when my parents got divorced and we left the house that I spent a good bit of my life in memories with my friends and family gatherings on Christmas and Easter having to take all my stuff and sort through what I couldn't keep old toys and blankets and I couldn't take the trampoline and swing set I had with me so many memories I've had with those two things it breaks my heart just thinking about it I have pets buried in that backyard I had friends in that neighborhood I miss it so much I remember being so happy and I can't go back and visit and I will never be able to go back to those moments and re-live them

this made me kinda sad, because I know that someday this is going to be something I'll have to deal with. It's weird to think that where I'm living now will no longer be mine anymore, or even my family's. The thought of things changing terrifies me and thinking about change is usually quite damaging to my mental state. I've been through a lot of changes this past year (none of which will compare to what I'll have to face in the future) and at times I've found it so utterly hard to deal with. Nostalgia often consumes me and it can hold me down for weeks, and that's what reflection on the past year did to me. I fear for the future for that reason. The future will be bright but it'll be so so tough.

i know how you feel, i had to move out of my family home a couple years ago and it was the worst feeling ever, like it was the shittiest apartment ever but it was my home and i grew up there

i cried with dodie all the way through this. ive had to move multiple times becasuse of parents jobs or school or other things. i get that getting rid of child hood is difficult 💓💓

the first paragraph of the thing u wrote, i relate to soo much. it feels like my life is changing. i was getting used to it, and i was liking it. and now things are changing idk

Watching you burn that box made me physically hurt, I can't imagine what you're going through

yessssss rhett and link they're the reason i got into youtube

I'm relating to this a lot because me and my parents are moving from my childhood home this year, and I haven't really excepted it because I'm so excited to be moving. But it's also really sad because it's not so much the house that I'm gonna miss, (which I will because I have a great backyard) but it's more of the fact that I won't be seeing the place where I made so many memories. Idk it's weird but this video helped me realize how I'm feeling about moving, thank you dodie & I hope things get easier for you :)

dodie that made me cry. cause i can sympathize with you and i can't imagine having to leave my home rn...

This is also one of ma big trigs lol. When you've moved as often as I have and been through as much as I have, it's really hard to let go of every little thing, because you're never quite sure HOW important it may become later on when you don't have it. But here's the silly thing! I didn't have a happy childhood or teenagedom. I certainly had happy moments, but overall it wasn't good. So I've clung on to every memory and trinket that reminds me of those happier times. It got even worse sometime after I turned 16 or 17, when my parents made it pretty clear they didn't want me around anymore, so I was shuffled from friend's house to friend's house until I could finally afford my own place. It wasn't until after this that I found out my parents were throwing out most of my childhood or baby things. For some reason this hurt immensely and my "hoarding" problem (quotes because it's not TRUE hoarding where I'm keeping literal garbage) has only gotten worse. I know this hurt you a ton but I hope to get to where you are someday, because we all need to learn to let go. We'll become stronger for it, I promise you.

When I was 15 my parents divorce so we have to sell the house (and later move to Australia... from freaking Hanoi lmao). I still recall the last day when I sit in the middle of my emptied room, looking at my emptied shelf, we used to have quite a book collection that I have to let go.
Left me with a scar till this f*king day. Parting with our childhood house is fucking hard.

when I was moving out of my old apartment, my parents made me throw away all of the little things that reminded of good stuff in my life. I didn't really cry at the time, but now I really want all those things back ;c

I recently just moved all the way across the country. away from my family and friends. And I'm finding it so difficult being alone. But I know that this place can be my home. It's just scary

I think I missed the queue for sentimentality. My parents recently moved out of the home they had built to bring me home from hospital to when I was born. I lived there my whole childhood and early adulthood. I thought it would be hard and I would be sad but it was so business like on the day, there was never a right time to feel teary and nostalgic. I think the fact that my parents were so excited to move on helped. The thing is.....I still have all the memories. I didn't lose them. I've never even been back to look at the house again, it's just a house, it means nothing to me now. Someone else lives there. The memories came with us.

My mom always said "this too shall pass"



Moms are important, people.

Can I put out a request for a video with Hedy sometime soon? She's so cool

Dodie, i understand completely what you mean when you explain 'home'. Whenever I'm in pain, or I'm sick, or I'm just completely done with life, I say to myself "I want to go home, please take me home" because even if I am in my house, if I don't feel comfort, if I don't feel loved, if I feel hurt mentally or physically I am of home. Home is an emotion to me, any postitive emotion is home to me, love care happiness comfort, that is home.

This is so me i actually started crying
Like we moved to England 5 years ago and i havent been back home in 3 but the thought of our old house suddenly not being there anymore scares me so much i hope my parents will never ever sell it cos idk how i would deal

Omg why am I crying??? It will probably be a while before this happens to me but it makes me so sad to think that this will happen one day. I hope you are all happy and starting a new and exciting chapter xxxxxxxxxxx

When you threw the box in the fire I couldn't help but start crying

Urgh. This got me bad because I moved around a bit growing up so I've never had a home like 'this is base' to fall back on. Can't imagine how odd that must be to say goodbye to somewhere you've associated with base for so long but I can understand the whole moving in general thing. You'll be fine. In a year or so 😜🙈

Your mum seems great, such a typical mum of like "get over yourself" but also "I am here"

Ahhh i'm going off to uni next year and I'm like you. I keep everything from when I was young and happy. My mum is telling me to get rid of all the stuff i don't need but i just can't. I want to take it all with me to uni but I know my student accommodation will be too small to do that- ughhh. I've completely lined all 4 walls of my room with photos and memories- blank walls just make me sad.

The quick little mention of when you moved out and said goodbye the first time, got me. That's going to be me relatively soon and I'm not ready and just dreading it. I still haven't listened to your song about your room, because of this. Just, I can relate to having to say goodbye and having that moment hurt, but at the same time, it opens up chances for new adventures and memories, so the pain will soon be gone, but boy am I not looking forward to that goodbye, because that is going to hurt.

I'm too scared of the possibility of this happening to me, I've lived in the same house all my life yikes. so I'm blocking it out, and cannot stop thinking about the fact there's a station called "theydon bois"

I just had to move out from the house I lived during 19 years and parents during 30 years last saturday, it feels like losing a part of your life, like if those years just vanished.

I'M CRYING SO MUCH RN?!?!???? OH MY GOD I RELATE TO YOU A LOT I'M REALLY NOSTALGIC TOO I CAN'T LEAVE THE PAST I COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT

your mum seems so lovely, i like how she helped to distract you by playing pokémon go when you were upset

Just now as I glanced thru these comments, my brother called to say we've sold the house we (and our mother) grew up in. I was last in it 15 years ago (we've had a tenant since then, who recently died), and time and wear and tear have drained nearly all the monetary value out of it. Sure, one looks back, but home isn't there anymore. Memories of home are just that, memories. A house is a house. Home is a living thing that we have to feed daily by taking care of the the people and the relationships and the things we value, and ourselves. Best of luck with yours, Dodie.

never known anyone to be so emotional over so little

you Dodie are a strong human

I'm also a bit on the sentimental side for my stuff that really made me happy. This day will come for me too :-/

i moved a few months ago with my parents and my old house is still ours, my sibling still go there all the time and my sister still lives in it, and honestly it will be so hard to move out of there completely. it feels so hard already because i see it once in 3 months, but if well sell it it will just feel like im letting go of an entire era of my life where i made memories there. and i really relate because it'll feel like im letting go of an entire part of my life where i was just happy all the time, never even doubting that, which now is just the complete opposite.

It hurt my heart when your mum said "but this already isn't your home anymore." I understand the getting rid of the before in a different context but I hope once you push through the sadness you will be so happy and feel so much better.

What I miss the most about my childhood home is the markings on the wall of me and my sister's height as we were growing up.also friggin Hedy having her shit together all the time smh how dare she be functional and emotionally stable

My parents are just as sentimental as I am when we move I don't think we are gonna be able to get rid of anything let alone burn it :/ I feel kindof sorry for dodie but I do think moving forward is a good thing especially if she finds it hard to let go of the past as she said in a previous video. I hope her parent': new home is lovely :)

my family have never really stayed in the same place or bought a house until last year. the thought of not moving again is weird but reassuring. thorughout my life 'home' has been transportable and easy to move and being tied down to one place freaks me out a bit. for me home is where my family is.

i moved out of my first childhood home when i was about 9 or 10. i moved into a trashy house in the middle of nowhere and that was awful. but i stayed with my grandparent's for about a year before then. we moved into a lovely home two years ago but it burned down in august 2016. right now i'm trying my hardest to get through this with my family. this is so complicated not living in a permanent home and staying with my grandparent's who hate us. it's a complicated time.

I started crying when she threw the box in the fire, It was so sad! And she also made me feel hungry when eating that pizza....

My parents are gonna sell my home when I transfer out of community college and this video makes me so scared to leave my childhood behind.

god im gonna have to go through this soon since after i graduate im moving states with my mom and hhhhh its gonna be hard to just pick up and leave

i hate my house for all the same reasons but i was born and raised here and there are SO many memories, not looking forward to leaving it all behind

I'm somewhat of the complete opposite to you haha I hate keeping memories (especially when they've become bad ones - I experienced something rather traumatic as a teen) because I feel the past is always dragging me down and I still feel stuck in it... I really wish I could let go more easily. When I see other people's childhood pictures and memories I think it's the cutest thing and I sometimes wish I hadn't gotten rid of my own, because it's harder to remember what you are made of. The good thing about it is that you reinvent yourself more easily :)

I been thinking for a while ago the moment that I will leave my house, like move to their city and stuff. I have many years in the house I'm today. I have many memories, not only the ones that I made here (with my friends and family) but for me my bedroom feels like home. I feel comfortable, I made it so personal, like in the walls, with photos of my friends and me and the things I'm passionate about. I'm gonna cry myself out the moment I walk out forever from this house.

I moved across the country from my childhood home right before high school and it killed me as much as it killed you. I sat on the floor of my empty room and just cried and cried. It felt like a piece of me was getting stomped on and abandoned. I still cry thinking about it. But I understand that what makes a home are the people I love and everything else is arbitrary. Memories don't have to be physical like a house or little souvenirs. That's hard to accept but I'm getting there. I hope you can too :)

this honestly made me cry so much wathcing you cry while going through all this

Your mother is the most adorable lil dove

Oh Dodie, you deserve the worlds supply of tea!

I'm scared for life for that moment I have to leave my house and I'm especially freaked out of the idea mom & dad will eventually move out too. The fact that I will never have a change to go back to my old place where I learned so so much.. A place where I felt save, free and could go to those moments I wanted to shelter me from the outside world. It's the bulding where I first said hi to the world when I was born in mam and dads bed, it's the basis of my childhood memories and the place where I grew tremendously as a person. I have to accept that I can't stay here forever and that I must leave my home full with memories behind. And that just sucks.

I understand your sadness about leaving that house. Wer recently moved out of the flat that held my complete childhood, and it was hard leaving that behind. However, I didn't cry at all; until I walked into my room the last time and it was completely empty. Seeing the place little Sammy lived in empty and cold was the hardest thing of all.
I feel way more at home in our new house, though. I love this place, so I'm kinda okay with leaving my childhood.

Wow i understand this so much. I'm such a hoarder, I have all sorts of bits and pieces (a similar box of notepads and drawings) and if I had to burn that? Oh lord no.That would be SO hard. But admittedly I probably should.

This and little room will make me cry every. single. time. I'm only 15 but time goes so quickly and I can already see myself having to do this. I not ready to grow up yet

God I wish I could talk to and be emotional with my family. All they tell me is that I'm being ridiculous and am too sensitive.

I can't relate because I've never lived in a place for longer than 2 years. But I can say that due to that, I've learned that home isn't where you live, it's definitely where your friends and all that good stuff are. And the memories are still there, so hold onto those, you don't need the actual building to remember the good times you had in it.

i moved out of my childhood home last summer after spending the first seventeen years of my life in it. it was very sad as its the only place i saw both my parents in, happy and loving each other, as well as the place i met my childhood best friend who i've driften apart from. it was like saying goodbye to all those things, those memories and moving into a new place. but now i realise how moving was great, the bare walls are now full of us, my mom is dealing with money better, i have a room to my self.. it just took time to grieve

in your next video (or some point in the month when it hits you) could you talk about how saying goodbye to your childhood house has affected you?

Ahh dodie 💜

When you put that box in the fire i looked at my box of old diaries and notebooks and i was like i dont want to get rid of them, theres so many memories.

See, my family has lived in three homes and one apartment, so once I move out, I won't feel that sense of sadness, I also don't really have a very close relationship with my family, so it will be weird. The one thing I want to take with me from this place is my cat because she's the best haha.

i moved house a few times when i was younger, but it was only the most recent move that really got me. i guess i was old enough to understand that i would never be in a place where so much of what made me me happened again. i didnt pack up my room until i absolutely had to. i loved that house. god i loved it. i lived around the corner from my best friend, i had neighbor as close as family and the building its self was so old and beautiful and full character. and now its not mine anymore. theres another family living there and another child in my room and i tell my self where i am now is better. a new country, a new start, ive grown so much. but i still miss it and a piece of me will always stay in those wonky walls of a town house in Brussels.

Moving from state to state and city to city this makes me glad i never lived in one house my whole life.

aww loved the vid!! just wish i got to see ur family members faces haha

u. r such a sweet person. Love yr video's

I've moved house about 12 times in my life after the 6 or 7th move I disconnected from the feelings of sadness. Every time I moved the most important part of my home moved with me. That would be my conglomeration of sib's and the parental units. In the end a house is just another building. TTFN

I know EXACTLY how you are feeling and you are NOT alone. Back in 2013 i moved away from my house i had lived in all my life and i always said i would never leave it. Unfortunately our situation was also very serious due to various things but i got over it after 7 long, hard months. I would explain it all but there is so much to talk about. Thank you for making this video it really has comforted me about mymass sentimentalness for the past, seeing as im also a guy :) -Mark

I want to say something supportive and reassuring but honestly I can't find anything good to say about the situation. I literally balled my eyes out screaming when she threw her "box of happiness"in the fire. I'd be a really bad person to look to for motivation. Best wishes nonetheless, stay strong Dodie! xxx

I've lived in my current house for the last 13 years of my life, we moved here when i was 5 so i did all of my growing up here, but i know now for a fact that i won't care one jot when i/we move out. A house is just a house to me. I have a small box with all my memorabilia in it, mainly tickets to things etc, and even that i wouldn't be horrendously upset if it went missing. And don't get me wrong, I'm a sentimental person, but my house is not where my happiness lies. Which may be due to me not being an overly happy teenager at all, but even my happy memories in the house won't make me miss the house at all

astrid is my hero honestly what a mum

I'm scared for life for that moment I have to leave my house and I'm especially freaked out of the idea mom & dad will eventually move out too. The fact that I will never have a change to go back to my old place where I learned so so much.. A place where I felt save, free and could go to those moments I wanted to shelter me from the outside world. It's the bulding where I first said hi to the world when I was born in mam and dads bed, it's the basis of my childhood memories and the place where I grew tremendously as a person. I just have to accept that I can't stay here forever and that I must leave my home full with memories behind. And that just sucks.

ahhh when Dodie cries I start crying i cANT

OMG her mum sounds so young!!

you are so bloody brave oh my god I couldn't do that

I'm only 19 and I've lived in 9 different houses. The longest I've lived in the same house was 6 years and that one sucked so much to say goodbye too especially cause I didn't know I was saying my last goodbye when I was. (we were suppose to come back to it after living somewhere else for the summer but we didn't and I haven't seen my room in that house sense) there's a lot of stuff I had to get rid of, lots of things that held memories. those things are nice to have but at the end of the day it is just stuff, it's not the memory itself.

i started crying when your happy memories caught on fire

The past is the past you don't need material items to remember the joyful times your brain will hold on to them for you you are strong dodie moving house can be really fucking tough but I know you can do this you may de saying goodbye materialisticly (is that a word😂)but as I said your brain will hold on to the memories it and you want you can and will do this

tha talk you had with your mom at the begining made me cry and made me feel better

My parents are getting divorced and it feels like everything i've ever known is falling apart. My mum moved out and my dad still lives in our family house (so do I) but home doesn't feel like 'home' anymore. I'm so sad about it and this made me cry even more but I get what you're going through!

AW NO this is too depressing! I feel the pain because we had a house in Houston, and we came back to fix it up before we sold it. I was saying my last goodbyes, and I go in the backyard, go behind our club house and started crying my eyes out because I had been there for most of my life and that was the last time I was going to see it. It's just so sad leaving your child hood houses and never seeing them again.

your back garden reminds me a lot of my ex boyfriends back garden and it brought back so many memories of me playing in the garden with his brothers, weird haha

Dodie, I know you're not going to see this. But please, if you do. Just know that we don't expect you to post every day, if you're going through a hard time. Take a day off, I don't want you to feel like you NEED to post vedif for us.

But besides that, I appreciate your strength. I know this must have been be hard for you.

I'm also really sentimental.. When I moved out I felt so sad, becouse it was like a "chapter" that I was closing... It always takes me a little bit longer to get used to something new :P

Why am I crying it's not even my house! To be fair I had to go through this same thing when my parents moved out of my childhood home. It was my grandparents home before theirs. The hardest part was painting over where me and my best friend had carved our names and the date into the wall of my closet. I definitely cried as well.

This video makes me so anxious bc I can't deal with getting rid of things and memories. Like the fire part I couldn't even watch I'm so sentimental

as a person who has lived in at least 5 different houses, i wish i could have a place to be attached to

my heart hurts for you darling ❤️❤️❤️

You throwing your box into the fire actually made me cry because I know I'm going to be where you are someday because I know I keep all of everything and I won't be able to keep it all but I just can't get rid of it.. and I know that will be me someday.. ahhh

Today I saw a listing of my grandparents old house they had until about 3 years ago and it was for rent. I don't know how I got there but I'm having the same feelings you are about your childhood home because my grandparents' home was always felt like a place I could run away to. And now it's not. And that really sucks. But I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way because I've been sobbing and irritable for a while and felt like a drama queen (I am but I'm just glad I'm not the only one lol)

I've been in similar situations so many times because every 4 years I change of home but also of country... so I Know that it is very sad to live your home, where you grew up 😕

This made me cry because I've lived in the same house for the first 20 years of my life and I know my parents are going to move somewhere smaller eventually because its a house that was big enough to hold 6 but all 4 of us kids have moved out now and I DONT WANNA SAY GOODBYE EVER MY WHOLE LIFE HAPPENED THERE AHHHHHH

seeing Dodie Crying makes me want to cry cries worth it.

i remember you winning the break up song contest. and i then i remember finding you probably a year later and being so excited when i figured out where i knew you from!

dodie's mum is the sweetest

Good thing I never have to go through this because I moved so much as a child and I don't have any fond childhood memories lol

i enjoy videos like these ones :') to think that one day, i'll be in my 20s and 30s, & you won't be youtube-ing anymore; & i wouldn't know how your life is going is such a sad thought

soooooo, my parents told me, a couple years ago, that they were thinking of selling The House (the one where we've lived since I was 8), or maybe just the property around it. I cried. More than once. They still haven't sold it. Every time I visit, I'm so grateful that I get to go back again. They still might do it, though. If they do, I will cry soooo much.

Pauses video runs to get tea, sits and listens to dodie while drinking my tea

I'm also moving away from home..it's very hard leaving the place that witnessed so many memories..that is why it's hard. :(

Hedy is so eloquent!

i am so so proud of u for doing all this but seeing u cry broke me so much oh my god i am so messed up
i hope we both feel better again someday baby
i love you

I've lived in 10 different houses in 20 years so I don't have that concept of a 'childhood home' that I got attached to growing up - we never lived anywhere for too long, basically we moved into one house and were already planning the next move so we were always decluttering to get ready to move again so I didn't have an accumulation of stuff to make me nostalgic. However, at 20 years old I'm back living in the home I was born into (mum kept the house all these years, now I live here alone - I chose to get my tiny box room back I lived in as a baby) and now I'm so attached to this home I can't ever imagine leaving 💕

Cried at: setting happiness on fire in the yard
Other times i cried:literally the entire video.

I remember when I had to say goodbye to my childhood home it was terrible. the place was absolute sh*t but what I didn't want to let go was the memories and the friends but the thing with all if that is that all those things stay. its the part of growing up were your scared of letting things go but its sadly a thing that we all have to do eventually.

seeing you and your mom and sister talk so openly about how your current situation isn't good is a such a foreign concept to me. in my household everything is shit but i don't deny it, i know it is. and i feel like here at home our parents are still trying to glue all these broken pieces together but it's just useless; nothing will be the same ever again but that's okay, it doesn't mean we won't be happy ever again, it ju t means we're not a family like we used to be. but they don't want to face it, face the fact that we're broken, we're so broken. they make it aound as if everything is fine, when it is not. i'm done wishing my family weren't the way they are; now i just wish for them to see how messed up we truly are

watching your video made me cry so much bc the topic of family, especially my "home" is my achilles heel as well. and i think that maybe it is time for me to move on with my life too. i don't want to be trapped in the past like they are... it sounds a bit mean to say it like that, like i don't care abt them, but i do. but it's time i care for myself too...

anyways. u'll probs not read this but i truly wish for you to find your home and happiness, and for your mental health to get better. you're so brave for doing what you did and move forward like that. you're more amazing than you think and i know "amazing" is such a vague term but i've always been bad with words but i want you to know that you've been helping me heal myself one video at a time and i'm pretty sure i wouldn't be the person i am if i hadn't come accross in here. and i like myself, i finally like who i am so thank you

just, thank you

(uhh sorry for dumping this huge text in here lmao,,)

i get attached to things and places easily, i'm 15 and already moved 8 times. And now finally we live in a house where we'll stay for the rest of my teenage years but i think this house will be the hardest to say goodbye to when i'm moving out. Allthough i cried for like 6 of the other homes. It's weird to tink that i felt at home in so many other houses. And it's even weirder to go back to that place and not going in the house. I don't know, kinda wanted my thoughts out here hehe

Dodie, I'm 22 and my parents just divorced last year. No one talks about your parents divorcing when you're an adult, but it was the hardest time of my life and I feel that in its own right is a more painful ordeal as an adult. My fear that I kept returning to was the thought that I would never go "home" again, even though my mom was keeping my physical childhood home. It hurt to know that I'd never come home to my mom and dad together again, to be able to walk out of my room and catch glimpses of them in their happiest moments, or to gather at holidays and feel like a unit. It also awoke feelings that my childhood was not as grand as I remember it to be (and I have sad home videos to prove it), and I had a hell of a time mourning the childhood I thought I had, something I had never dealt with. I will tell you, though, that on the other side of it I am the happiest and most at peace that I've ever been. I finally feel like I'm moving forward now and not just making small circles in one spot. I junked a majority of my memories, positive and negative, and it was singlehandedly the most freeing thing I've ever done. I hope you feel better, and cry when you need to! There were many days I was pushing through work to just make it to my car and sob. You'll be in a better place because of the hurt, I promise.

(I'm fairly sure this won't mean much to you dodie) but I just wanted to say I'm really grateful you uploaded this and talked about how you're dealing with it bc 1: I'm exactly the same with pushing stuff down that I don't want to deal with, 2: I'm also extremely sentimental and nostalgic and 3: my childhood house is being sold and I have to get rid of all my old childhood and teenage memories too. It's really comforting and calming to see someone I look up to going through the exact same scenario and seeing you deal with it I think will help me deal with it. I'll miss my house and all the amazing memories I made in it but if you can get through it so can I. Xxxxxxxx ily dodie ❤❤❤

Seeing dodie burn that box of her memories made me think would I do the same as I also have a box of stuff that Ive collected full my my high school memories 😶😯

I wish I had gotten the chance to say goodbye to my home...

Fuck. i'm gonna be doing this soon as my parents are getting divorced as well. i'm 21 and still live with them because i'm college and it's just so hard. this video makes me feel less alone and less stupid for being so upset by it. thanks for sharing the good and the bad dodie, you are a gem

you took it so well ino as you said you've already said goodbye but it will hurt a little

this is not dramatic or overplayed at all, I'd be bawling my eyes out if the house I grew up in would be sold or anything

i cry every time i watch this video

I'd forgotten the Rhett & Link thing oh my gosh!! that's funny because I got into dodie because Rhett tweeted a link to Sick of Losing Soulmates a while back and I was instantly hooked

It made me cry!

this video made me very calm for some reason

I absolutely dread the day I have to do this

I've actually stopped watching Dodie because it actually gives me pain in my chest. I'm so lonely and Dodie being the perfect person that she is, makes me feel it even more. :(

As Boyz II Men said, "It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday."

Watching this gave me inspo for song lyrics, so thank you aha xxx

Hedy: how do you end these things, just alright bye lol?
:D

You have no idea how much I cried during this video, I hate saying goodbye 😔

dodie this isn't my home and all but i'm still crying why must you make me cry i love you

I had to say goodbye to the house I spent all my teenage years in last year and that was difficult. My mum has a new house and I have a shared house at uni but I still don't really feel like I have a home.

if you want a song that fits this experience so well, listen to 'The House That Built Me' by Miranda Lambert - so beautiful! Maybe not right now because it will most certainly make you cry, but it is so beautiful and so fitting :)

As a fellow sentimental person I sat here crying until I noticed you have olives on your pizza and that made me upset in a different way

omg dodie when u started crying i started tearing up ah

this made me cry. i never cry.

DODIE I WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND. I feel you'd be the type of friend who encourages their friends to show their emotions and express them, the kind of friend to listen and experience it with them, and just be kind and accepting of everyone no matter what their religion or sexuality or gender or ethnicity or anything else! that you'd encourage those parts of them and let them know they're loved. TBH this is what i've gathered from your personality from all the months i've watched you, and IN CONCLUSION i've gathered that you'd make a great friend and that i would like to be your friend. that is all. hahahaha

my family recently moved. we left and throw away so much stuff. so many memories. a lot of stuff we didn't mean to leave and its gone now.

dodie i love you so much.

I'm really fucking sentimental (I get it from my mum) and about 3 years ago my family and I moved. I'm in boarding school in a different country so I'm never really at home. It feels like I've moved out and left behind all the happy times because I'm depressed now and my parents have a shit relationship and I have no friends and I always argue with my sister. I'm surrounded by junk from back when everything was good and my mum wants to throw it away but I just can't.


So I understand a little Dodie, I suppose.

i cried so fucking hard at this omg. fuck this made me realise just how much i hate change and saying goodbye. i hate the idea of leaving and 'forgetting' my old life. i moved like 300 miles away from where i had lived for almost 10 years a few years ago and it didn't faze me (because i was like 11) but now when i think about it, i hate it. i hate being so far away from my friends and where i, essentially, grew up.
things will be hard for a while, but it will be okay. sometimes holding on is a lot more painful than letting go

I've moved states eight times, and I'm only sixteen. I can't even imagine this.

i had to say goodbye to a thing i loved, too. my dog passed away and she felt like part of me for the time being. i am sorry :/

This made me feel so sad for you but also just cannot relate cos I love throwing things away

goodbye little room you served me well


im so sorry :3

you might be saying goodbye to the physical or material but never to the mental. your memories exist for a reason and your brain is your own invincible video camera stored with happy events from your past <3 stay strong doddle ur happiness will come back

I love that your mum just says it like it is, like a 'no shit attitude' get on with crying already

I think leaving my home (AKA childhood home. Still consider myself a child) is my personal idea of hell. I get this awful separation anxiety from people, things. I can't imagine separating myself from the place where practically, a fourth of my life has taken place.

I actually made a short movie on this topic. the meaning of home and homesickness and not being able to be home. :) it's quite an interesting feeling, I believe. x

Agh this is getting to me. I'm a super sentimental person who hates change and also happens to have ocd and hoards everything. I moved when I was in eighth grade and I still think that was one of the hardest things I've ever done. I've moved again since them and I just found out my parent's are getting divorced so more changes are going to be happening. It's hard.

This isn't necessarily related to this video, but after watching this, all the recommended videos are you with a huge smile or just goofing around and having fun. And for some reason that's what's making me cry??? Idk, I love you dodie, even though this was posted months ago, haha <33

When you put them books in the fire I cried and I can't explain why I did

dodie we're moving on the 25th (i think) and i've taken down my posters and memory wall and just it sucks and i feel you

your little "oh, jeez" made me cry

Oh Dodie xxx I moved away to go to uni two years ago. Shortly after that, my parents got divorced, and sold the house I grew up in. I was devastated. Everything I had ever known was gone, I was in a new strange place where I didn't know the places or people, and worst of all, I'd convinced myself that I didn't have an actual place to call home. But I was so wrong. When I went back for Christmas and I was on the couch with my dad, with a full belly, cuddled up watching tv, it didn't matter that it was in a place that was foreign. Home is where the people you love (and that love you) are. In that case, you have a home with your mum and Hedy, one with Hazel, and one with us weirdos on the internet. Love you xx

oh dear, this just makes me wonder if i will ever lose my childhood home. it's a shitty house, but i had a happy childhood and it could've been so much worse. i mean, there's a forest and a huge garden. only the inside is a bit of an architectural mess. i don't know, losing this place would be so weird!

I reeeeaally get this, because my childhood home got sold last August. I miss my home, I miss my room, but to be honest.... it wasn't my home anymore in the end, and I felt like I was just visiting my childhood and my dad and sister. It was still hard af.

Today in chemistry we made lead (II) iodide which is a yellow powder and all I could think for the entire demo was "is it dodie yellow tho"

i really liked this video. but also, it made me realize i don't really have a place that i consider 'home'. like you talked about a place where you felt loved and feel calm and comfortable. i moved out this year for uni, but next year i'll be living somewhere else because i'm in residence. i was so happy to move out bc i really don't feel comfortable in my childhood house, and have a lot of bad memories associated there. it makes me realize i kind of don't have a place where i can feel grounded and truly home. i guess i'm a little bit lost right now.

My family house is being sold too since my dad passed away in june 2015 from cancer, so I'm going to go through what you're experiencing. But my family house is such a happy place, we moved from britain to France and my parents did up a huge old farm and made it into this awesome gîte for bikers as my dad was a biker. It has a swimming pool and a scaletrix and a trampoline and a pool table and a bar and we had loads of animals like chickens and ducks and cats and a dog and guinnie pigs and doves and african land snails... saying goodbye to that place is going to be the hardest thing I'm ever going to have to do after saying goodbye to my dad... I've been going through the same mental health problems as you and having you to relate with has really helped me come to terms with certain things (I'm bi too also...) But no matter how shitty things get, and how many things change, the sun will still shine, the sky will still be blue, and the world will keep on spinning. head up.

I keep so much stuff like school books and birthday cards and I couldn't do what you did! To me that was so brave! Also, like selling the family home and all the feelings that go with that is unknown to me, my parents split up when I was 6/7 and my mum had to sell the house and we've rented ever since. We're kind of 'between houses' atm (due to the stupid way they now do private renting in the UK) and living at my grandparents in the meantime. We'd been in our previous house for 9 years so it was hard to say goodbye but it wasn't something we had a choice with and I'd moved twice before so was kind of used to it I guess. I still miss that house loads though. I think the main thing to remember is that the memories never go. I've got fond memories from all 3 houses I've lived in before and am sure I'll make more when we move into our new house :)

Dodie, your thoughts remind me a lot of a quote from Garden State: "You know that point in your life when you realize the house you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? All of a sudden even though you have some place where you put your shit, that idea of home is gone. One day when you move out it just sort of happens and it's gone. You feel like you can never get it back. It's like you feel homesick for a place that doesn't even exist. Maybe it's like this rite of passage, you know. You won't ever have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, for your kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I don't know, but I miss the idea of it, you know. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people that miss the same imaginary place."

a year ago, i was 18 and i had to move out my first and only home, i can't afford to move out from mum but we had to downsize and had to throw everything away, it was the worst. then we got screwed over in our new rented house and had to rush move out after 6 months, get rid of whatever memories and sentimental stuff we had left and were homeless for 5 weeks. then we found another house and after 6 months in the new house i feel lighter but the past 15 months have been the most stressful things ever. i feel your emotions, it's sad saying bye

I'm a borderline hoarder when it comes to sentimental things; I'm 26 and I have a tissue a friend of mine gave me when I was 13 because she said keep this as a memory???? All my life I've moved around a lot;I have lived in three countries and the most I ever stayed in a house was 11 years, so the move from that house (3 years ago) was intense and I did throw away [SOME] of my school notebooks, and apparently I felt fresh and lighter, and then a couple of months ago when we moved again I realised, I really do still have a shitload of things, but I just can't bring myself to throw them. So when you threw that box, my God my tears were just like IT'S OUR TIME! It hit me really hard.

'cause they say home is where your heart is set in stone, is where you go to where you're alone. It's where you go to rest your bones.

'cause they say home is where your heart is set in stone, is where you go to where you're alone. It's where you go to rest your bones.

this video is making me cry and the comments are making me cry. but you know what? thank you. sometimes its just good to FEEL.

this made me cry and i don't know why

This makes me want to cry with you

Watching you get made me sad
such a beautiful bean shouldn't cry

It's so devastating that you watched your happy memories burn. Gahhh 😭 Please tell me you have some digital copy of those photos or something to remember the times you were so happy as a teen?

I had no idea you covered the Breakup Song by Rhett and Link! That's so cool! That's awesome you won the signed picture!

i can never experience this though because ive lived in four different countries and probably wont move back to ireland (where im originally from) until right before or after i graduate which sucks.

I've never had a permanent home, we've just moved quite a lot. We do have a family home in my home country, India, but I don't have anything to associate it with home, except for the fact that I was born in that city and that house was the first one I breathed in. We have another flat in Delhi, in which I spent five years of my life in, which is the longest I have ever lived in a house. The house I am in right now, as a 16 year old, is temporary and will be taken away from us once I leave for college next year. So sometimes I really wish I had a home of this sort, a home with a lot of memories and things to hold onto. Oh well, we gotta live with what we have

This is one of the most reliable things I've ever seen

I feel like I spend half of my life pausing these videos to see what the text on screen says lmfao

all I did was cry...I'm moving from the home I've lived in my entire life this summer because my mom's getting married. I have to start high school as a freshman and I'm not able to help out the people who rely on me in this town (my school's band: every other band kid is too stuck up to do shit when our band needs it). My house, currently, is small, messy, and cramped but both of my dogs just died and it just feels like everything is ending. Fml I mean everything in my fucking life sucks so much ass rn. Damn I think YouTube comments are my therapy.

I've been in the same position as you my dad it in the r.a.f which means we live on the campus so we constantly move and I have never had a stable home but MATE It's OK I AM JUST THE SLIGHTEST MAD BUT I AM OK 😂

Omg Astrid and Hedy are so funny. 😂😂

I never ever cry at movies or I'll shed a small tear but if I see dodies eyes start to tear up i will start completely bawling

this made me cry for some reason LOL

Okay wow i don't know why this made me cry 😢

This Video made me Cry x

i really agree with this video, about this whole being afraid to let go of things because they hold memories. my dad has critisised me for this before, saying its a mental illness that i hoard everything, but everything holds memories for me and these objects are the trigger for these memories so throwing them away is like throwing away my memories. it is really hard to do this though, because my bedroom is baisically a dump that is full of junk that to me, is full of memories, but to other people is just rubbish. taking photos of things that i will want to remember can help, rather than collecting physical objects, but it is very difficult to throw things away. i get really sad driving past my old house because i grew up and moulded my personality there. i became who i am there and even though the house i live in now, i have lived in since year one, i have only developed tha here. throwing things out is always hard, but especially for me and some others.

sorry if this makes it harder but i have to comment on how nice your childhood house is- v jealous of those fields out the back. have fun making memories in your new family home

Gah I hate that I can relate to this video 😔 when hedy said about driving round the corner for the last time I was like a shit that'll be me and now I'm a wreck lol 😂😂😂😬

ik how you feel.. i used to live in this small ugly house since i was about 6 or 7 and then we moved cause we couldnt pay for it anymore and it made me really upset.. it was the first home i remember being in with my aunt who had passed away.. she also was like a mom to me soo.... it pretty sad. haha but IM OKKK

ooooooh, so sad, dear😢😢 I'll miss that great place too!! wish you stay positive and find out new place happy place!! creative💗 don't be so sad, dear! we love you!

I don't know if I'm missing something or I'm asking a bad question but why was it such a shit home for them?? ❤️

i am in floods of tears

Bunk beds are 👏🏼 awesomeness

It is hard, but it's always good to get rid of things that are linked to hoarding

My childhood House is not being sold and my parents have gotten divorced years ago , but this video in a way inspired me to go through all my stuff ( i'm such a nostalgic hoarder) .If not for me then for my mum who is going through tough time with her own parents . I know going through it will have me aching but in the long run I think it's going to help ..and mum will be happy to reaapropriate some space in her own home too . Anyways thanks dodie you being so open about what is going on inside is a gift to all of us. xoxo

I havent allowed myself to think about how I've basically left everything behind to study in another country (my family, my friends from my co-curriculars who were my entire LIFE [theyve probs forgotten about me already tho]) and I distract myself by scrolling through mindless shit on the internet (unproductive, but I distracts)

And I'm sort of ¿ already broken, its like hairline fractures on my sanity. And the moment I snap and allow my feelings to come flowing through I'll break, I know it.

But whatever, fuck it. We're all slowly dying already so I might as well emotionally do it faster (cause thats what everyone wants isnt it? To be at the head of the rat race?)

I find sentimental value in the tiny little things. My drawers are full of cards and posters and just random pieces of crap that I guess are actually just junk. I've moved house 7 times in my (nearly) 16 years, so I've never really gotten attatched to a house, just the things in it. All my posessions are tucked away and out of sight and a lot of it I haven't looked at for years but I don't think that it would be easy for me to get rid of. BUT! The big but! In just under 2 years I might be moving across the country for uni. Yes, it's 2 years away, but think about how quickly the last 2 years went! The fact that I'm probably going to have to get rid of all of my sentimental junk is painful and I don't want to think about it, but it's lurking in the back of my mind and really not a lot of fun at all.

It's good that you got to voluntarily say goodbye to those physical things from your childhood my house burned down recently and though I've only been living in it for a little while I had all of my journals and books and trophies and stuff from my life so far and all of it I mean all of it is completely gone my mom has her old pictures but all the stuff I saved is just gone I'm only 15 and I'm sure I'll make many more memories but all the ones from my earlier childhood have just disappeared

What the heck! you didn't have to burn them, I have kept all my old school books etc for good memories and to look back on in the future, u didn't have to burn your childhood away, let it be there to refer back to and move on happily without erasing it from your life x

this video made ME cry

"thank you little room you served me well" -yoi

It's not on the same scale but my sister is moving out of our room at the moment and everything is changing in the house, and she's getting rid of a lot of stuff and altering everything. I find it so hard because I'll keep anything, and break my heart over throwing away train tickets and receipts, so whole rooms disintegrating feels weird in the not fun way. Our house is so small and so full of things, so objectively I know this is a good change, but I still hurt a lot over it. I guess part of it is because my friendship with my sister used to be so strong and now the connection just isn't there like it was. Like you said in your description, her moving out just feels like stepping further away from the things that made me truly happy. I find the loss of her friendship to be a kind of constant and domestic devastation. We don't fight much, it just kind of leaks out in unmade tea and silent rooms.

I'm rambling... oops, haha. Thank you for the note of hope in the description Dodie. I'm fairly sure you're not really sure about getting better, but I suppose it's the uncertainty that will make it all the better when it happens. Like, you'll wake up feeling a little better, and because that pleasantly surprises you, you feel even better about it. And then maybe it's kind of an upward spiral that continues, and it could never have happened if happiness was a foregone conclusion. If it leaps suddenly, it has the most powerful effect, maybe.

Rambling again! I'm the worst! Thank you for the video <3 in this weird time, it felt like solidarity. You're the best!

this video makes me emotional and it's not even my house lol

I'm so sorry dodie I really fell bad but it will pay of soon :)

I don't think I would be able to burn a pile of old notebooks and cards aah I'm also too attached to these things. But well done you! (Did you take out the most important pieces though? )

this is so sad I would never burn my school notes and stuff I would find a storage building or a safe for it omg

i literally love you.

I hope you kept that Rhett and Link picture! I always wondered who won it.

your mum is so right, damn.

i didn't really HAVE a childhood home.
i mean, i did, but we moved a whole lot for personal reasons. every new house wasn't a permanent home.
so all im saying is, i have no idea what you're going through. but i genuinely hope that you'll be very VERY happy soon. :)

be proud my baby, be proud of yourself

don't forget about trying not to romanticize the past, it will make you cry even more! the best is yet to come honey

this would be my absolute worst nightmare. I've had 3 hellish years and my home has been so safe. I get to crawl into my bed and feel safe, like the hurt can't touch me. It is so incredibly brave and strong of you to be leaving that behind. But you guys hate that house. You'll be living somewhere so beautiful and while moving on is terrifying and painful, it's through pain that we heal and get stronger. Much love to you dodie, finding your new safe, happy home. And to hedy of course.

Oh my God I also cried when you burnt that stuff cause I know I could never bring myself to burn my diaries and letters and photos and all

Also that random old school picture of you looks soooo much like Hedy hahaha

Memories are in your heart, not in material things.

knowing that this will be me makes my heart ache

"Far better things lie ahead than what ever lie behind"

I can't stand throwing things out because of all the memories and sentiment attached to it.

your smile is so cute

She burnt her memories. I'm obssesed with time and teenage memories, so just looking at she burning her stuff gave me a headache. So brave, though. I couldn't do it, I'm so attached to the idea of keeping my life inside objects to take care of as if they were a part of myself. It's bad, and sick.

god i get that about keeping all those things...i have boxes and boxes of just notebooks and papers from school that are ultimately meaningless and should have been trashed years and years ago just because i've felt like i needed to have them around. even though i'm away at college and i'm there more than my actual house, i do feel as if it's my "base ground," as you put it. i know the day's going to to come soon that my dad will want to sell the house and i can't imagine what that's going to feel like. this was a very beautiful and honest video <3

I just teared up a little as I hate the town I'm from and my first "home" was a shitty little flat so I never cared for it but then me and my mum moved into this house which visually is shit but it's my base and I moved to London for uni and then moved back home after a year and next year I'm officially moving to London. I won't miss the physicality of the house but my mum, memories it's gonna be hard. London is my home. I felt it when I first moved, it's gonna be fine.

This is not the happiest of stories but I really do relate to pretty much everything you say in this video. I had a box exactly like the one you put in the fire. It had notebooks, drawing, notes with friends, little random objects that were from very important times in my life. We moved house when I was 13 and I put all that stuff in that box and marked it with: Memories do not throw away. I was not so much upset to move out of my childhood home because there were some horrible things that happened to me in that house that I am still trying to sort through in my head, but it was the whole idea of leaving the memories that were made while I was living in that house. Anyway, once we moved I was still going to school and I went on a school camp for a week, while I was gone my Mother decided to clean my room and sort through everything for me (after all these years I do see that she was doing out of the goodness of her heart), but when she was cleaning she threw out my memories box, and I came home to a clean room but when I tried to find the box to put the piece of twine I had threaded into a fishtail braid for my friend, it wasn't there. And I started freaking out. I can still remember that feeling in my chest, just absolute emptiness and horror at the idea of all my memories gone, just like that, they were gone. But after all of these years I finally realise that I can still have those memories but they are just not in physical form anymore. Seeing you burn that box made me burst into tears because I remember exactly how it felt to leave all those memories behind. Stay Strong Dodie. we love you, xx.

this video made me cry and idk why

Oh dodie. Watching you burn the cardboard box and everything in it made me really sad.

This made me think about "The house that built me" by Miranda Lambert

Why the fuck am I crying right now?
My family had to move a lot when I was a child and then my parents got divorced and my mum and I lived at my grandmas house for like a year until we found a really shitty flat that was kind of affordable. And while that moving with my mum happened, my older brother lived alone in our old house but he couldn't maintain a house so big at the age of 18 so my dad sold it because he already lived with his girlfriend.
What I want to say is, that I was really young and I just didn't deal with all that shit because I just couldn't but now I think about all that and it makes me kind of sad that I never said goodbye to that house because I loved it so much and it breaks my heart when I see it on my way to school and see what the new owner does with it.
So yeah, I kinda know how you feel and I also can't say goodbye to things or people so yeah. That's great.

This made me cry alot but I don't know why because i've never spent more than a two years in the same home. we moved across the country from my fourth family home when I was six and we've moved seven times since then. nearly every time we move, another collection of memories from our first family home is chucked and I don't care too much because I'm used to it. Every year we go back to my hometown and it's like we never left. I just have so much love and memory attached to it even though I spend so little time there. I think the reason this video made me so emotional was because I could identify so strongly with that attachment to things from the past and things that I have been apart of for so long.

I appreciate that across the pond, you don't have to throw you're stuff out, you can just set that shit on fire in your backyard.  At least in my particular state, you need a license for a fire pit.

I kind of wish I could feel like this? I've moved house seven times and I wish I had a specific home with happy memories (I know there's bad memories too but I don't have any specific happy memories in any of my houses) so it kind of sucks?

I have the exact same problem that you do. I can't let go of the past but the issue is, my parents moved/move a lot. I had no way of physically keep up with or visiting my past. There was one small town in particular that I was really attached to because I thought that that place was where I did the most growing and I thought that place was the peak of my childhood.
Eventually, just a few months ago me and my husband took a road trip back to that town so I could show him where I grew up for a while.
The crazy thing to me was how anxious I was the whole trip. I was kind of scared and I didn't know why.
After all was said and done, I found my closure. I realized that the reason I felt I had grown so much in that one place was because I lived there before my problem with living in the past developed. Eventually I realized I am better off where I am and that I need to live now.
I feel like maybe down the road you can come back one day to the area of the house, relive your past for the day and realize you don't miss it.
I don't know though. I know that people are all different in how they handle things and I just wish you well, Dodie ❤

Tear drop 😥 idk this video made me sad but I liked it lol 😂

Fuck that hit me in the feels. This summer my parents moved to Egypt. Now, we've moved house before, but this time saying goodbye was like saying goodbye to a 'base' in the UK. One that I could go to when down or stressed or ill. I hated that house when we moved there (I had a load of friends in the place where we lived before, and the house we moved to was in the middle of nowhere - we genuinely had a bus that would take us to town on a Wednesday and return in a Friday) but now that I can't go back... It's terrifying. It's like I'm a proper adult, who has to make their own base in a city, on their own, without that safety net. They moved in August and I still think about the woods by our house, and taking our dog for walks when I was super down or stressed, and sitting and just watching birds and deer and rabbits. It's weird to mourn a house - and I guess I mourning my dog and the fact my parents buggared off to a different country - but when that place is your 'home' it's hard. Really hard. I hope you're new place is lovely. And if it's not, write a poem about all its faults (like the fact your bedroom door won't close, the heating doesn't work or there's on one bloody bus to Carlise every week), and I'm sure you'll grow to love it ❤️

is it alright to ask why you both think the house is so horrible? it looks beautiful to an outsider

trying not to cry in the school library because i was literally in the exact same situation a few months ago, my mum was just as unsympathetic lol but i guess it's easier for our mums now because they see it as getting rid of the clutter and life getting easier, just herself and the children. but FUCK it was hard for me to move, and to watch this video lol

my mum also makes me tap all the pokestops when we're driving

this. is. so. sweet.

oh my god my mum does the same thing with the pokemon haha love her

I've never lived in the same place more than 3 years soooooooooooo. But I still love you

why did this make me cry?!?😂😭

Just watching this makes me so sad

i think that home is the people you're with, not the place you sleep in. you have your wonderful family so in a way you'll always have a home :) ily Dodie xx

it looks like you're living on a farm. cowgirl!dodie

I will never have this. Ive had to move around every few years for all of my childhood... I can't get attached to things anymore

this is making me cry

This is so sweet. Watching you put your memories on the fire reminded me of when I moved away for my childhood home. You're so wonderful Dodie ❤️

Oh my god your backyard of burning memories!

Dodie, I completely understand. I have no idea if this'll help you or not, but I wanted to quickly share... basically I am extremely similar to you. I was a super happy child and LOVED my house and my siblings and my parents and I thought everything was amazing. Things started to go to shit when I was around 12 or 13, my sister developed a severe mental illness and I was old enough to realize there were issues between my folks and my dad was bipolar and angry and lots of wonderful stuff, and then my mom died when I was 15. That was the start of saying goodbye to my home, but then my dad remarried two years later (2014) and everything got even shittier. I was blessed with full blown severe social anxiety as a result of my mom dying, which then turned into a full blown anxiety disorder by the time my dad remarried. I met a boy and we dealt with a lot of crap and he helped me cope with the hell that happened when my step mom moved in (a story for another time). that boy and I struggled a lot to make things work but he is wonderful and now we're getting married. <3 But basically, I've cried buckets of tears and felt my heart break over letting this home go, first because my mom died and then because my step mom changed it-- the first time she cleaned the living room i went and sobbed for an hour because the clutter had been part of my life always and it felt like I was losing my mom and my childhood all over again. I really cannot express how hard it was to say goodbye, even while I was still living there. I think I'm finally coming to a sense of peace about it though. This house isn't my home anymore, my home is in my soon-to-be-house with my soon-to-be-husband, even though I'm living with my family for a couple more months now. I've said my goodbyes and even though I have a few more tears to cry I'm sure, Dodie you will get there eventually. It's okay to be heartbroken over this but you will heal. I love you <3 --someone who really understands

Hedy is my favorite person

I'm a bit dramatic too and in fact I love dramatic dodie

CARPET ON THE WALL
MY RUSSIAN HEART IS TOUCHED

You see, I will never get the feeling that you have about this house, because I have moved at least once every year I have lived! I'm 14. I do miss previous houses because I did have good times there however I feel like I have never had a childhood home. It becomes hard for me to feel at home sometimes because I just judge the house as a "non-permanent house just for now" kinda house. I do wish I had a childhood home and something I can store all my childhood memories but I can't because I never had one. So consider yourself lucky aha. This is why, when I am older and have a family I am going to stay put in one house while my child grows up, (if I can) and that way my child or children will have a childhood home.

Gaw, I love you. Dork.

your cat is louder because of the empty house ... in other words the acoustics are different. Um, Dodie looks like Tori Amos meaning that as a compliment.

Hi there. I'm not on my actual account cause I can't find my phone so this is my cousins account. If this makes you feel better you still look nice when you cry.... and that's impossible because I look like a dying cat but you look like a stunning creature that's just fluttered through the forest of beautifulness.

i started crying when you mentioned alice, ugh i just can't ;-;

I have no memories of when I was younger and that really scares me like when you guys were talking at the end I just don't think I'll ever have that cause I just don't have any memories and it's so depressing but at the same time I'm glad cause when I was younger a lot of stuff happened that I'm glad I don't remember idek. I like being able to just write here and if people want to read it they can but if not it will just get lost in the sea of comments

I actually cried

Dodie can I just tell you how fucking happy I am for this? of course, not the ending of your home (it's not really) but for the moving on. I am just so fucking happy you're finally moving on. and if it took you to burn all your past memories to just move on then fuck yeah it was worth it. if this helped you and if you thought this was a good thing, then I'm so fucking glad. dear Dodie life cannot be lived if you're always thinking about your past achievements and goals and fun times. you have to think about the present and yes the future too. if this is a step to your moving on and focusing on the present and/or future then good fucking thing. seriously, your mum is so right, about fucking time you got on. this isn't to be mean, I'm trying to congratulate you. yes it's hurting, everything hurts. but it will be good for you. you'll become this amazing person, not that you're not already, and you'll not get sad over your past but you'll be excited for your present. putting goals so you can reach them is important too. Omg you have no fucking idea how happy I am for you. continue your amazing YouTube channel, flash us with awesome videos and vlogs and MUSIC. the best of luck ❤❤❤ I'll still obviously watch you in other videos, this is not goodbye lolz

im really sentimental as well but i also hate hording so its kind of conflicting. my best friend gave me an acorn AN ANCORN when i moved away from where he lived and i kept it for like 7 years until i finally lost it recently and it was so upsetting.

I would be crying.. the whole video would have been my crying lmao 😿😿 im sorry

i remember that backyard when hedy did the ice bucket challenge :)

Epping is only up the road to me, BUT I need to know what was on your pizza because I stared for ages and I couldn't work it out aha

I live in the neighbouring town, Harlow!!!! much love xx 🖤

My old house got knocked down and we built on top of it my new house and now it feels more like home here

I shouldn't be watching this too many emotions aaahhh

I was told to burn things that mean the most to you..letters of love etc etc.Weeks ago I was clearing out my stuff and writings from the past and wish I could have burnt them. It seems to easy to discard things...but I'm contemplating starting a new life far away from home and I know I cannot take everything (question is....what should you take?!!) but throwing away stuff is throwing away things that you had memories with,things that shaped you as you are now.Grrrr lol...

I'm 16 and never moved. My house isn't necessarily the memories, but this town. I could never leave this town. In reality, this city isn't all that great, every one of my friends just talks about getting out of hear one day. But I don't think I could live without the trails and downtown city side walks. I love this town so much and I've begged my brothers and my friends to never leave it because I cherish it and my memories of it to much. I can't help crying at this video because I know this feeling. I keep scrapbooks and pictures and boxes full of everything because I'm scared of forgetting it all, but the one thing I can't stick on a paper or a letter or a box is this house in this neighbourhood in this town. I love travel and love exploring new things, but I struggled even letting my parents renovate a room because it was nothing like the memories I had, I don't know how I will ever move to an unfamiliar town with unfamiliar people well my childhood gets dumped in the bin.

A house is not a home😊💕

Hedy should be an interviewer

I'm going to be doing the same thing soon, this summer actually, I hate the thought of thinking about it. I came here (to America) when I was like, 7 or 6, and now, (7 or eight years later) I have to say goodbye to eVERYTHING. My room, my friends, my belongings, and my home. Im terrified.

I loved the pizza interview

dodie this made me cry im not ok

I could never burn my childhood omg I just couldn't physically gbddhjhn I'm so nostalgic

I honestly cant relate to this, because I moved so many times as a child. I dont have a childhood "home".

Fuck, I became emotional over leaving a house I've never eVEN SEEn

I'm kind of glad that I never had one childhood house... I've moved in and out of small NYC apartments all my life.

You didn't have to make it such a final thing, if you had just ignored it and moved on with your life that might have been less painful x

when she asks you to catch Pokémon to distract you 😂💛

Live in Buckhurst Hill and loads of my family lives in epping and I love it there

Dodie 😊😊

dodie and I are in sync with periods, shh important stuff

i did a lil' tear :,(

Welp now I’m crying

Also dodie doing what you're doing is unbelievably SHIT so you're allowed to be "dramatic" (your not) it hurts. It's ok for it to hurt. let it hurt be dramatic and help you and your family get through all this shite lmao

it hurts me to see dodie hurt

Dodie you should do another asmr

Anyone else heart break a little during this video...

1:34 that is a nice Dodie yellow tarp you got there in the dumpster

I don't have anything from high school or primary school left. As soon as I left high school I threw it all away. I had the polar opposite experience of Dodie, I hated every waking moment of school, when I left. I felt free, I dumped everything that reminded me of school because I still have PTSD from shit that happened (yes I'm diagnosed). Why would I ever keep anything that reminds me of the worst time of my life.

I'm burning the memories
burning the letters...

am i the only one who noticed how similarly hedy speaks to dodie? like the way they form their sentences and how they speak is so similar. idk just a lil thing i noticed

Dodie cries, I cry.

how do you talk so normal about your feelings?
i don't
i don't get family love like what

I get depersonalisation (I think Dodie has it as well) and so because I don't feel a lot right now, I focus on the past, before I got this thing that messes up my feelings. I remember the past and think of it as the times when I could be happy. The one constant home in my life is my Grandparents farm, and I can't imagine throwing away the objects that hold my memories. Yay rant about my shit mental health and how I hate it :)

Aw dodie




Also I hate to seem heartless but I was watching the progression of the pizza

I 100% relate to being a sentimentalist, even about the smallest and stupidest of things, so I would find what you're going through hard too. I just want to send you like a billion hugs rn <3 x

a home is not a place, a home is the family that you have.

Can I just like hug your mum, you and Hedy please? Can I just give your mum a big hug with you in the middle and Hedy in the middle with a cat please?

doodie dont eat pizza while recording i cant focus on wat u r saying my mind is thinking all the way since i saw that pizza of what does it taste like and that i want one right now!

aww your momma is so sweet <3 ((also me with pokemon go)) :))

I got to 3:03 before just pausing and sobbing

I know this is probably not what Dodie wants to hear and I know she probably checked before doing this - is she gonna regret getting rid of any photos or letters? Like especially if they made her happy?

Omg did you say Milly Molly Mandy books? Those were my favourite as a child!

THIS MADE ME RLLY WANT PIZZA

omg what on earth your garden is the nicest view

It took me too long to realize that was Hedy at the end.

Tufty: just screams

i am legit crying

I'm not crying YOUR CRYING

there is so much irony with you being dorothy from the wizard of oz..... and i love it. weird how life is huh?

Omfg i love how her mum plays Pokemon go, that's so awesome!

awesome!

i hope my parents sell this house that would be too much for me to handle

3:08 at the bottom corner of the poster is that the dog that PJ used in his first animation? FUNNY

how come she always talks about hedy and has her in her videos but this is like the first time we even hear about ian

wow this timing is a weird coincidence but ha Im moving in a few months across the country, and geez im not ready to drive down all these roads I know for the last time.

we won't place any stock in old days
let's save up for something new <3

why did i watch “sad gogglebox moments” and then this? i’m sobbing

Am I the only one who cried?

omg I need that jumper , where did you get it from !!! 💞

I started crying because I hate my home but the day I say bye to it will be hard

I was like nooooo when she put the box in the fire

I've been in the exact same situation and it's horrible ,weird and aghhhh but it's all ok in the end

How old is Heddy?

'How many times have you said goodbye to your room?!'

I saw you in the car because you used to live near me and i didn't believe it was you today but now i realise it was you

why i am crying so much at this lol help

Can someone tell me what she said at the end? "Happy Vedif??!" I just started watch Dodie. Love it! But what?! Vedif?!

I CRIED WATCHING THIS BEC SAME

I wanted there to be a little room (reprise) so bad

The way i see time, i think, is that everything that has happened, the past, does technically not exist. like, the only thing that does exist is right now, not the future, not the past. it not something i often think about, i wouldn't say that i completely live in the now all the time, i think everyone needs to look back and forward every now and again. But i see it as that everything constantly change, maybe just the smallest details, and everything that is will never be again. so in a way, with every second or millisecond if you will (time is just a construct blah blah blah) youre saying goodbye to something. im not gonna pretend that i would be more fine if i had to go through something like this. its still saying goodbye to something huge, you dont own this house anymore so its not your home. but what has happened has still happened, all your memories of this place exist just as much as before you sold the house. selling the house doesnt change the memories. im just trying to sort out my thoughts of this video, feel free to not care <3

I wanna hug you so bad.

i cried and its not my stuff , im scared of letting go as well

When Dodie put her teenager stuff in the fire it was so sad v.v

OMG i didn't know that you won a competition of a Rhett and Link song! Cool stuff...

omg you burning that box. im afraid I might have to do that one day too

Omg I'm cryyyiiinnnggggg I don't wanna grow up and say goodbye to my own hommeeeeeeee😓😓😓😓😓

she just....tossed it...in the fire
im so sad for u, good luck bud. i get nostalgic from time to time, but my childhood, wasn't bad, just nothin' special to miss too much.

NOOO FEELS STOP IT

"It's a pretty shit home anyway."

"There's your childhood... In the skip"


ASTRID I ADORE YOU ❤️

I'm only 14. I have not moved out of this place, and I used to plan to never move out I loved it so much. But with my prick brother and my parents who never really help me with any of my problems, this is the worst place to be. So I often get home and get on the computer, put on my headphones, and drown them out, all the way until I go to bed. Daily. Its very unhealthy. And all I want to do is move 800km away and live with my aunt. My favourite one.

Please tell me I'm not the onlyone who thought that Ed Sheeran will suddenly appear in the yard singing castle on the hill

Once there was a way... To get back homeward..

8 month befor I moved out of my parents house, they moved. I didn't want that. the new home was only 3km from my old home away but there was nothing it was a house in the middle of nothing. it wasn't easy to meet friends or go to partys 'cause you always needed a car. and now I don't have a real home anymore, I live in my own apartment and it it's nice but not home

<3

<3

Ahh Rhett and link! 😁😁

+doddleoddle holy crap you're from Epping! I used to live in Gants Hill and go to Epping Forest as a kid!

I love that your mom wants you to play Pokémon Go for her lol

I hate to see you cry 💗

I'm crying so bad... why IM NOT SUPPOSED TO THIS IS NOT MY HOUSE OR SOMETHING

this is so sad :(( could dodie not have taken some notebooks ect to her flat or the new house and stored it away? xo

YOU HAVE SUCH A NICE HOUSE LIKE THE PLACE YOU LIVE IS IN THE COUNTRY I LIVE IN FUCKING SHEFFIELD WHERE MY LUNGS DIE EVERYDAY

my mom still plays pokémon go as well and it's the funniest thing 😂😂

Aw my lil cupcake

it hurts my heart that you burned all that paper instead of recycling it aaah

ugh you took this way better than I would have had. LITERALLY BURNING YOUR HAPPINESS WTF I WOULD HAVE JUST BOUGHT ONE WHOLE SEPARATE HOUSE JUST TO KEEP A BUNCH A USELESS CRAP THAT I HAD WHEN I WAS A KID.

God is was so difficult for me to move out

I know this is serious and sad but at the same time the fact theRE'S JUST A FUCKING FIRE IN THE BACKYARD 😂😂😂

1:10 literally my mom

why am i crying too?

I love the alternative titles lol

I cried with u

how old is your sister? she's so mature wtf

poor doddi

so how long did you actually live in the house for?

Ur mum is so savage holy crap

I can't believe you live so near to me :) xx

Do remake of "little room" ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Dodie ily

is that flower in your hair Dodie yellow?

The thing is, I don't think people ever really let go of past things such as their former home. There will ALWAYS be something that reminds you of it whether it be a picture, a sound, a smell etc. Saying goodbye is hard, but just know (happily) that you'll always remember your home....I don't really know where I was or am going with that and I could have said it much better, but I am like you Dodie, I hold on to the past. It's good to say goodbye and it can be sad, but be happy that you'll always have memories of it If this made any sense to anyone bravo

You could have kept your childhood stuff... I mean, if it brought you that much joy. :( But I'm sorry you had to go through all that.

is that flower in her hair #Dodieyellow?

Awh bubba💓

I love you so much god

my house is rented so this is my worst fear lol

Whattt rhett and link why my favorite YouTubers are all related that feels so strange

I was hoping Little Room would play in the background

Dan Croll - Home

Please sing this

TELL HEDY TO UPLOAD

I've just found out that I'm moving house in a month

Your mum '...but it's a shit home' - hilarious!

Why do all mothers have that same flip phone case haha

OH MY GOD YOU HAD A PICTURE SIGNED BY RHETT AND LINK !!!

When hedy first started talking I thought it was tessa lol

(WARNING: I am an over emotional peice os shit and thing is something youshould probably skip past) When i watched this i was just so emotional. 5 years ago I left my family house i was only eight but I think it was one of the hardest things i have ever had to do. I would play games with my dad and help my mum cook dinner i was happy all the time and would always be around my family. But then my parents split and we had to sell the house. Me being so young and wanting to keep all my toys and gifts my mum decided it was better that she dealt with it and chucked them all out. It was a supposed "fresh start" but afterward I just felt awful. I would never talk to my parents and they would never talk to each other. Everyone distanced themselves from each other. My dad has moved five times in the past year so with him nothings really felt like home and as for my mum we have had one house but again for some reason I don't call it home. I don't feel happy and I haven't felt happy in a long time. I have just realized while watching this video that i have felt down the past 5 years of my life and I really wish I still had my home back

My room floods, because its in the basement, and its been like ten fucking years and my parents havent taken the problem seriously (because we/they never have any damn money) and it finally got to the point that it soaked the cardboard boxes that had some books and tapes in them, like Little Golden Books, probably gems, worth something. And the ones we couldnt save we set on fire. Or at least my parents kind of set them on fire. But then they never did the job properly and now they are covered in snow and ice and the sodden box stares at me when i look out my window. But the other stuff, less precious, barbies, rusted toys, homework i could never quite throw away are all fine. I really should get rid of them. Its not like any of my brothers or sister will be having kids, and the kids wont want our shitty used toys lol. I still have a few porcelain dolls and stuffed animals i keep in my room. One of them is Pongo from 101 Dalmations. These i have no intention of ever getting rid of.

But, Dodie, I'm just wondering why you burnt everything ? Couldn't you keep your boxes ?

thumbs up because it's okay

this made me sad and its not even my house

my joy burnt with her box

i can't believe you put all that in the fire. i would've just like made a scrapbook or something. wow. that hurt me watching you do that. i can't even imagine how you felt.

What did Hedy say at 4:05? "mum, can you please stop ..." ?

Who else just wants that pizza

I'm crying- why am i crying so much

I watched "When" 15 million times after this

Was that Hedy's voice?

So, I'm crying now... ;-;

Don't you just wish sometimes that you could relate less?

where did u get ur coat from?

This is comedy gold hahaha

MILLY MOLLY MANDY MY CHILDHOOD!!!!!

I love you

i don't understand why you berned all your happy memories from your teenage years :'(

OMG my mom does the exactly same thing with pokemon go ."

Anyway, I don't speak english very well, so I'm not sure if I understood what's going on:
Why does she have to get rid of all those memories? Is it because the new house is too little or what else?
Then, I don't want to be tactless, but what happened to her father?

I know it's not my business, but she is sharing it with the world so...?

Didn't have to burn everything, just keep it

what city are you moving to? did you live in London before?

omg uploaded on my birthday 😭❤

I love your cat he scream

I need to do that. Move on and such. yeah...

if that was Tess in the background towards the end she's one grown alot and two sounds a little American

em i sitting next to me crying over this so thIS SHOULD BE A FUN VIDEO

actually crying i-

fuck, this made me kinda homesick lol

How is your tree!? :D lol

Why couldn't you bring the box of your memories and keep it in a cupboard or something in your flat? x

i want pizza now :(

I move every 2 years, i don't understand why someone gets attached to a house, can someone educate me?

I also noticed some good refreshments... 1:45 lol

Ooo repping Hainault!! Yaaaasss!! 😂😂

I don't understand why you can' just keep some stuff. I feel like burning it is a bit over dramatic

dodie; is crying her mum; can you get the pokeballs please we're at a pokestop

Oh but wait why did you have to burn everything? Could you keep some stuff?? :((

My milly molly Mandy books!!

Does someone knows where Ian (the brother) is? Because I really want to know idk

A little girl grew up in here. She's far too grown up to live here anymore.

your not obligated to answer this because im sure you have valid reasons but i only wondered why youre throwing so much away instead of say giving some away?

😭😭😭😭

dodie where are you moving to( kinda creepy sounding, weird question but still curious)

Where abouts is that house. I ask out of curiosity as I think I live kinda near in Walthamstow

FUCK IM CRYYYYIN WHAT

Home is not the place, home is the people.

Sorry, why did you throw that stuff away? Honestly, this is just creating a problem so you can be dramatic. Who doesn't just love diving into a box of memories? You'll regret burning that when your older.

Is that Hedy speaking in the background?

also I love that your mom plays pokemon go

OMG DOROTHY PLAYED DOROTHY??

why am i crying

hedy said "like" 34 times...

Im the same...i hate change and I don't like letting go

Your mum plays Pokemon go aw that's so cute

um why am i crying

That view though...

Pizza makes everything better

Love you and your music Dodie! You're such a big inspiration to me, thank you for all you have done! <3
stay positive ;)

I'm feeling awfully anxious today, so thank you, Dodie, for posting this. Your videos always make me less stressed and more at ease <3

Oh, dodie, your videos make me so happy. Even though this one's a bit sad. I hope everything goes well for you in the future. Much love xx

I love you Dodie and I hope everything continues to be good <3

What a lovely end to the day. Dodie you always brighten my day xx

I'm actually SO in love with the bit where Dodie sits on the floor and eats pizza and just chats with her mom and sister. It's such an adorable little window into her (their) life and it's just a really cute moment okay

dodie I feel the same way and I know it's hard to let go of memories

your mum is so great i love how she tried to reassure you and make you laugh. she's great. hope all gets well soon. much love <3

Hedy is so smart and mature! Tons of hugs for both of you ❤

I fully empathise with the tears. I cry at thought of having to say goodbye to my home one day when my sister and I have left.

You'll always have us lot as a home and an anchor, if that helps in any way 💜 Also Hedy and your mum are so awesome, I had a good old chortle at "there's your childhood, in the skip". Lots of love and hugs 💛

Honestly, I can't wait till that year, that Vlog, when Dodie realises that she's beaten a lot of her struggles and doesn't live in before and after a crappy brain because her brain will not be crappy and she will be happy which is all we really want, right? Even though she's still the most adorable human being now, dodie deserves to be happy aLL the time <3

I could never do any of this, YOUR so strong dodie! I congratulate you! (I may or may not have cried while watching this realizing I'll have to do this)

I cannot tell you how much I can relate to this. Thank you Dodie for sharing this, I love you. God bless!

Oh what i wouldn't give to just go and give her a big warm calming hug ❤️ So so proud of you dodie 😘 stay strong 💪

I'm sorry about everything going on Dodie, I hope you'll feel better, ❤️❤️❤️ you

i get really nostalgic all the time, but i usually take the feeling and pour it into a song, and cry. crying helps so much, because its like you're releasing the feelings from inside with tears. idk just how i see it. love your vids dodie❤✨👍

Oh I got a little teared up.. I had this connection with my older home when I was younger. I didn't want to move, it was my playground to discover so many things. Sometimes when I ride by it and see it I'm like ya thats my home and it will always be my home. I don't care who lives there now, it was mine and it will still have my memories. hugs for you dodie <3

I've lived in the same house for all the 16 years of my life. And although I haven't left yet, I know that when I do it will be so hard. Each bit of chopped paintwork and furniture scuff has meant something at some point. But your video resonates with me because I know I need to get better at dealing with change - it is my biggest and ultimately my worst fear. And leaving home would be a HUGE change. I hope I can look back on it as you have with happy memories. Much love Dodie x

I'm really proud of u 💕

Hedy is so young but so mature, it's so beautiful :')

nostalgia is such a beautiful and melancholic feeling

Life pro tip: Take pictures before throwing things away, that way you can relive your letters/see your past possessions and not forget them.

No matter the video, Dodie's videos just make me smile, even today which has been very rough, so thankyou <3

I feel you dodie. I moved last summer out of my childhood home. Even tho I moved like 10 minutes away, I felt like a wreck. I was a mess but aye I made it 🙃🙃

awww poor dodes, i wish i could give you cuddles and love♥

this feels so relevant bc my family and i are in the process of moving out of my childhood home due to family stuff and it's hard saying goodbye to how solid the place is and what it represents. even though i feel like i said goodbye when i left for college, it sucks to have to pack up your life and leave somewhere you've always lived :(

You'll always have the memories though regardless of the tangible stuff! It's healthy to let go, I've pretty much only kept photos from my childhood (backup up in like a billion places cause paranoia)

This was so hard to watch D: I keep every one of my scripts from shows, every ticket from concerts I've been to, memories from travels, and I write down every happy memory every day.. I'd rather burn furniture and clothes to make room than burn my memories tbh you're so strong

so many feelings!
thank you for sharing this!
i dread the day i leave my home, since i struggle with letting go too. but i need to remember that all my memories, and my family will still be with me! just in a different location.
again thank you for sharing this and i love your cat
yeah

We're very proud of you dodie

The last house I lived in is the house I have my earliest memories in. It was definitely hard to let it go, but I had 2-3 years to say goodbye (We struggled to get this new one). The thing that I miss the most about the last house I lived in is the memories that were made in it. The house was too small to fit my whole family and my Grandma in. There were three of us sleeping in one room which is very cramped and leads to many disagreements. The kitchen was super tiny, and the only place you could be alone was the bathroom. I don't miss the house, I miss the things we did together in the house. Not the fights or any of the bad times, but the Christmas's and the birthdays. The times different family members would come over or the holidays we'd spend together. It's definitely difficult to let go of the place that reminds you of those memories all the time, but you never lose the memories themselves.
Anyways, love you Dodie <3

I am actually sobbing. This reminded me of when I moved out of my first home around one and a half years ago. The home I loved so much and the one place that was stable, was going away. It seemed like that old house had been so full of happy memories and this new one full of nothing but depression, fear, and resentment. But thinking that way is terrible. This house will have its own lovely memories just as that one did, it just might take a bit more time. I've only got 4(ish) years left here, so I'd better make the most of it!

idk what this comment was I just thought I'd share my experience with moving house. :)

your mum sounds so lovely ❤️❤️

oh dodes, my heart broke when you put your box on the fire. I'm sorry you had to do this and feel so much pain. We love you x

Thanks for sharing Dodie :)

"Thank you little room, you've served me well
I'm sorry for all the nail polish and tea I've spilled
You've seen my secrets, my fears, my best friend, my tears
My loved and lost encased inside these walls
A little girl grew up in here
She's far too grown up to live here any more."
...
I'M SORRY IF THIS MADE YOU MORE SAD IT JUST ALL I COULD THINK ABOUT. 😭❤ WE LOVE YOU DODIE.

i feel this SO SO much, exactly the same thing happened 2 years ago with the apartment i grew up in, and i'm still not over it. to have that place where you had all those lovely memories and to know you can always return to it if things don't go too well always gave me that sense of security. hope you can make your current home a place like that, too :3 anyway i really felt you hurting, hugsss

Too real. One of my biggest fears is my dad leaving my childhood home and having to get rid of everything, especially my mam's things (she died 5 years ago). Hope you're okay Dodie <3

This almost made me cry. I'm probably gonna have to do the same soon, maybe in a year or two (seems far away but!!) and it'll be so hard to say goodbye to this house i've always lived in... i know i'm gonna react the same way you did, so watching you almost prepared me a bit in a way.

I'm super sentimental, so I totally get it. Hope you feel better soon!

I actually kinda cried a little bit bc of how lovely Dodie and her mother's relationship seems to be

This hit a nerve for me ngl I cried so much watching this

Dodie my dear, I know I; for one, relate &would do just as much. My heart ached when you threw your happiness box into fire. Letting go gets easier by time. We love you, &Hedi &your mom.

this vid is just sweet in that way. i dont know when you literally were burning a box of your old memories, just damn. saying goodbye to the past sucks, but good job!! you're working through it and things will be okay !!

I wanted to hug you so bad throughout this video :(, love you so much babe hope you're feeling better soon xxx

even though i totally can not say that i know you, i feel like i do kinda, and i can not describe how much i want everything to be okay for you and your family. you are literally such a fighter and so strong and so giving, and i just hope that you know that and feel that. this is so cheesy to write, but i just hope that you get the message. i adore you

oh dodie you're so sweet i understand how sentimental you are because i am too. but everyone sells their childhood homes and it's emotional but that's okay

Oh my fucking godddd I am so happy for you, I mean, you change your life, make many for help your family and yourself. I admire you like a freakin lot :)))

I fucking adore you, woman. thanks for share you life with all of us :)))) really. Love you, Dodie. I know that you will be as happy as you were in your childhood, is the least that you deserve just for being the most lovely, charming and beautiful human that I have ever see :)

so beautiful and sad. I love you Dodie, you'll be fine.

I love looking back at my past because I think that I was so much happier when I was younger. But the only problem with memories, I think, is that they change over time and seem nicer now then they actually were. It probably wasn't as good as you think I guess

awe i hope you can work through this :)

Awww. I've never really stayed in 1 house for too long. My dad was in the army and the navy. We recently moved so his drive to work is only 1 hour and now he's in Iraq for his new job(still working with the army) so we're always moving around. It's kinda sad, but I don't remember most of the places I lived.😢❤

how can anyone dislike this?! :(

it's kind of funny, i love letting go of stuff, but i'm still super nostalgic and sometimes i regret letting go of too much stuff...and i still now and then visit the place where i felt the happiest, the least, uhm, 'mad' i guess, when things seemed ok etc and i still cry every time (i go there like once every year or every second year). thanks for sharing this dodie <3