These are natural things to feel actually. But your mind is trying to hold on too much. People havent learned to deal with these experiences.


This is so ironic that I found this today. I am having an awful mental health day because of surfaced memories that I don't want to remember. (I found a splinter) because of how someone treated me at work.


I thought that I might have derealisation so I talked to my mom and she said that it was probably just puberty and that it was normal..


It’s just like a switch. I feel alright and then all of a sudden I feel like everything is unreal and it’s so scary. And after 10 seconds I just kinda slap myself out of it. Could it be a lack of sleep also?


Mines phycadelic related, had a very terrifying mushroom trip and i guess i just stuck with me 😭


You are so amazing and my favorite YouTube of all time


I really need help. For a long time ive always had the sneaking suspicion that I could have DP/DR. But i honestly dont know.

For me, it generally hits in waves, like one minute im totally in the moment, talking with friends or smtn. And then Im hit with a wall and suddenly im in a new place and nobody makes sense and i keep asking "where am i where am i what am i doing here who am i" and i get real scared, heart pounding, sweating...I always hide it from my friends though (but sometimes when i cant, i just get up and leave the table). I dont really get it at home tho which is the only place where it is most mild.

I just dont feel alive sometimes. I just feel like a machine that processes sight and touch and hearing but is not actually living, ya know? I have no idea if this is derealization or what. i dont think it is, but im not sure if that is just me being in denial. Is it supposed to happen in waves or you just feel this way all the time?


Hey, I tried EMDR and I dissociated / left my body is that normal?


I had both reallll bad and couldnt work and my job insurance said they wouldnt pay me cuz its not a real disorder ! And i had a full paper from the doctor LOl


I saw your book in Waterstones yesterday! 💛


That was amazing! I learn a lot and maybe found something new about me. :) Maybe I should talk with someone, anyone, just know, that its normal, or not. :) Thaks. :)


i don’t have derealisation but i do get dissociation when i’m scared or in trouble, i got it really bad today


Ugh I've been dealing with this everyday on and off for like a month but now it's just here to stay and I cant sleep bc I get so scared


woah I might have derealisation. But is it possible to only feel spaced out on rare occasions, rather than all the same and/or often? <br>Because I've had a few moments of a dream-like state, similar to this. Where I felt disconnected from my surroundings. Like I was numb and sleepy.

woah I might have derealisation. But is it possible to only feel spaced out on rare occasions, rather than all the same and/or often?
Because I've had a few moments of a dream-like state, similar to this. Where I felt disconnected from my surroundings. Like I was numb and sleepy.

I also haven't had any noticeable trauma... idk


The sad thing is I watched this in 2017, half way through 2018 I began to have episodes of derealisation =(


Even as a kid I would have moments when I would “flip” and suddenly “realize” that the world was made of Play-doh including myself.


I was depersonalized for about a year.  It was the worst thing ever. I'd much rather be the most depressed I have ever been then not feel like myself. Loss of your sense of identity is brutal beyond belief. Weird enough what helped me get out of it was finding out why it happened to me in the first place.


It's weird because everything spoken about in this video is how I feel 24/7 but I ain't gonna self diagnose. I mean yes, I have been diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety but I dunno, I'm on meds and they help alot, with some stuff but I dunno :| at least I guess I'm not alone?


For me it's the WORST I also have HARM ocd (a fear of hurting people) and always get the intrusive thoughts of "what if I killed my mom/brother and it wouldnt matter because this world is fake" and it puts me in another state of panic and is the absolute WORST


Can you do more vids on both of your channels Pleaseee!!!!❤❤❤💗💗💗💗💗💗❤❤❤❤


Best thing to do here, is forget it, there isn't anything you can do accept to be very true to yourself, honest with yourself, and do not try to "act" as if, Don't act period. You'll find many to think you are somehow selfish, or conceded, whatever word you want to use there, you'll  Likely lose old friends, you Don't need them anyway. Don't compromise yourself, and Don't force unnatural tendencies, like being nice all the time because you think you have to. Easier said than done I know. But it'll be just fine. And I'm not for a second suggesting that you not have a certain common decency and simple elementary manners. For your own sanity, you must Be what you are. Even if you don't even Know what that is. So common social and political correctness goes out the door, I function as any other species in a natural way, many people don't understand this, they are caught up in worry, very neurotic, but we are all the same, no different, therefore you can know that we are all thinking of ourselves 90% of the day, thus it doesn't matter what others think of you, I don't give a damn (excuse the language) for what anybody thinks of me I'm singing my own tune and dancing to the beat of my own drum. Give it some time and everything will fall in to it's natural rhythm as long as you aren't acting against your own nature.


my experience with derealization, is weird. because im recovering from anorexia and bulimia. so when i used to throw up, the pain in my stomach and throat was so big that my brain used to turn all my vision completely white and like make me feel like i was high... its weird ik


I relate to EVERYTHING!
Probably why I am depression and Anxiety and NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME AND ITS ANNOYING!
Oof


I’m not sure if I have derealization, or if I’m just tired all the time.  My vision occasionally gets blurry, and colors look extremely bright. When I’m really stressed everything gets really loud. I don’t have trauma, no mental illnesses (that I’m aware of) but sometimes reality just feels numb. Is this derealization?


I’ve had this for almost a year now and it’s getting worse :(


Wow I thought I was the only one feeling this way.


I constantly feel like I'm in a dream. Like I feel like nothing is actually real. It makes me forget so many things because I can't actually remember things actually happening or how I can remember it. I don't know actually what to do. It made me fail most of my GCSE's because I can only remember some of things. 🙁


I feel like i live in my head butt im not really a person, and i just watch the outsider world. It also feels like i cant really controle my actions


thankyou so much for this video, this really helped me


I love all Katy's little saying. Like the parachute thing love love


I know it's been a while but I still have a question. I don't have chronic derealization but I've had two episodes while i was under the effect of marijuana, is that still linked with traumas or was it just a chemical reaction? I don't know if it helps, but I have been diagnosed with major depression, ocd, and anxiety disorder.

Sorry if the names are wrong, English is not my native language


Thank you so much ...this video came just at the right time..


I just started watching your videos and a platonic love has sprouted in my heart for you.... It's weird but I mean hey :\


I know what I need to bring up to my therapist!!

anxious finger guns

I know what *I* need to bring up to my therapist!!

*_anxious finger guns_*


Music and Animals can heal everything in your soul, I m sure.


Hey dodie my advise from a tall guy from Luxembourg. MORE ASMR all the time 24/7 :D


It's been one empty month on your youtube page


Is forgetting things also part of this? Like it's currently 4:40pm and I can't remember anything from today past 10 minutes ago. This happens everyday and I was just wondering if this could be part of it because it feels like today didn't exist


People often say you get it after panic attacks or something similar, but I never have that they just seem to come randomly. :o


Ive had this permanentely the last 3 years, i dont know if itll ever go away... it was HORRIFIC when i first got it


I think that I have derealisation and depersonalisation but my mum thinks that it is just hormones because I'm 11 and starting puberty. I really want to tell her about it but I'm sacred she'll just dismiss it. My school work has also gone down and my teachers can tell, I just say that I'm tired and I want to tell them, but I'm afraid that my peers and family will not believe me. Please can someone help?? I would really appreciate it. 💕💕


I'm pretty sure I have derealisation, I'm probably not the only one in the comments to have a story like this but I think my derealisation originated from a time I smoked tooooooo much weed and now I just feel like constantly tipsy and partially stoned and when I woke up the next morning I thought I had been given a different drug or something because I'd never woken up and still felt like I was dreaming before and I've now been like this for about 3 months. The particular time I believe my disorder came from I had a panic attack after smoking way way way too much so this comment has basically no use accept from to tell you to be careful or to help others have someone to relate to x


i related to this so much without even knowing i would before


My problem is I can't leave reality I am too aware of everything going on and everybody around me 😕


she shares a resemblance to  chloë sevigny in looks and in the way she speaks aswell as her tone of voice, great vid dods


EMDR is like teaching someone to swim by throwing them overboard. Whoever came up with that nonsense was a hack.


I experience depersonalisation sometimes


I've had depersonalisation with my own body but also with others(?) I mean, some times I would look at my mom's face and it would feel like I didn't recognize her. like, of course I knew she was my mom but it would feel like I couldn't recognize her face features and something was off. Does that make any sence?


dodie please i hope you don't turn into troye (i love him but i miss him so much). you've helped me so much and i feel comfort when i watch your videos when im having attacks or a bad brain day. please don't leave us. i love you.


Is it possible to have depersonalization but not derealization because I sometimes feel very disconnect from myself at certain times but I've very rarely been disconnected from reality. Also I tend to be very anxious to the point where I've been diagnosed with anxiety but that has led to a lot of self doubt insecurities, that led to me being diagnosed with depression because I just had these compounding thoughts of self hatred. At that point the depersonalization started as a sort of "coping mechanism". I'm doing a little better but I have swings sort of. Advice on dealing with low  days/moments ?


I experienced depersonalistion and derealisation this summer and it was horrible! I'm starting to feel like it is going now and feeling so much happier! :D


I took too much cough syrup went to school had a panic attack because i felt weird and i think i got derealization. It pisses me off somethin that stupid can cause this it bothered me for a long time my anxiety was horrible but the weird thing is my anxiety isnt that bad anymore but i still feel like im in a dream i cant think for shit i cant remember nothing(may be the drugs) i feel so spaced out and i have major depression idk if this has anything to do with it.  I was born with low dopamine and really low seratonin.


i have derealisation depression and anxiety. i’m afraid to tell my family because i’m scared they won’t believe me. only because i talk a lot some of the time. i still laugh at jokes and i can still have a good time. but that’s why i’m afraid they won’t believe me. i’m afraid they will just say i’m dramatic and i’m just trying to fit in. i really need a therapist but i’m to afraid to speak up. can someone help me what to do?


I think I have derealization, I have all the symptoms but I don’t think I have depersonalization <b>at all</b>

I think I have derealization, I have all the symptoms but I don’t think I have depersonalization *at all*


That jump in Zoloft is... crazy. I don't know Dodie's situation or how intense her depression and derealization are, but going from nothing to 100mg in a MONTH? even with 50 in between? From what I know, that is a LOT in such a short amount of time.

Zoloft is not that "strong" though - I take a different medicament which has a 5mg and 15mg dosages but with zoloft, it's not the same. I had to take it during pregnancy and I went from 0 to 50 in a week and then to 150 a month later during a week again. I think it's fairly common - but everyone reacts differently and to some people, this jump might be too much.


Hello everyone!
I have depersonalization and derealizatio and I need to start ising birth control (I have extremely painfull periods that make me unable to stand up and do anything for the rest of the day. I will feel like I am going to faint, puke and cry from the pain so).
I am afraid that they will make my depersonalization worse.
Has someone experience with them?


Going tru DP and DR last week and i feel horrible ='( i have moments in the day i feel myself i think..i feel confident and doing normal things, but the rest of the day just sucks. it gets worse ate end of the day/night but gets better if i stay awake longer cause i like the silence of the night (does this make sense)? also love the silence int he early morning..
I have a lot of traumas..this year i had two big ones..and i just letf a job that i hated, and now i dont have a routine and i also hate that. I think i'm just too confusing as a person and i'm always thinking in every possible scenario..
Great video btw


I haven't been diagnosed at all and I'm only just starting to look into it but I feel how they're talking about depersonalisation constantly I don't know


I’ve only ever had Derealization. I don’t think I’ve ever experienced depersonalization. Zoloft caused my shit


they were talking about big t’s and little t’s, and i’m just wondering if trauma from cancer could cause any of this...? i feel like it sounds silly but i feel like i relate to a lot of this and it just hard to wrap my head around.


What I like to do is I would rub my hand when I'm stressed so I can not get you know get pulled into a dream like state<br>EDIT: I talked to my bestfriend

What I like to do is I would rub my hand when I'm stressed so I can not get you know get pulled into a dream like state
EDIT: I talked to my bestfriend


What if you have just been through such horrible stuff, you've spent all your time trying to forget about it and or pretended it wasn't happening you just physicaly can't remedmer all your trama. How do you talk about it or get over it?


Finally people are giving a shit on dp people really need to give more attention to if because it really hurts me sometimes that not much people know about it and its not somrthing easy or something that you can just turn off whenever you want to its way more than that so thank you soooo much for making this video.. you earned a sub and a like and a share and whatever that good and possible


I'm not sure if it would be labelled as bullying , but I had an extremely horrible time in my primary school , everybody their was super mean and I validating to me about all the things I like and my art and imagination , so I kind of disconnected and started basically living in my imagination and 24/7 creating this entire ongoing world in my head . And I havent seen or spoken to anyone from my primary school for a year since I'm now going into year 8 . And a few months ago I realized how bad it was and how desperately I was making myself believe that the magical worlds were 'real' but not real at the same time. And so I have been kinda trying to drag myself into the real world but when I do try to i get extremely depressed , lonely and I think I also have pretty major trust issues because I think everyone secretly out to get and that their not real and I'm in a simulation or asleep and this is all a dream . And it's like super scary when this happens .
I havent been diagnosed with anything or seen anyone. And I found out about derealisation and depersonalisation so I went to my mum and was like yo , I think I might have this or atleast I have something , and she was like " stop trying to find problems in yourself and trying to be special " and all that .
So I have no idea what I'm supposed to do about this. And it is getting alot worse .

I was gonna mention this but didn't know how to describe it now I do so . I also have these weird thing were when I wake up the say I'm having a dream I'll wake up and I'll know be conscious but the dream will continue and I dont know how to explain how I feel whilst it's happening but I'll just be extremely confused I wont be able to properly do stuff like once my mother abruptly woke me up cause I was late for school and I sat up and had no idea what was going on , I couldn't properly speak and my mother gave me my clothes and ran out the room to do something and I had absolutely no idea how to get the clothes on and was seeing the things from my dream, in my mind their was this little thing dressing me , but in reality I wasnt moving and was just sat up on my top bunk dozily bobbing back and fourth whilst mumbling .but its Waaaaaay worse when it's a nightmare because mine are really bad and I woke up from one a few weeks ago and was pacing around cause I knew it wasnt real but it was , and I was pacing all around my house trying to wake up properly and I was kind of screaming and full on crying my eyes out whilst panicking. Nobody woke up so nobody saw this . But imma try and talk to my mum about it again . Hopefully it works . I'll update


It's so relieving and helpful to hear this. The last year has been terrible, without going into details my girlfriend (I'm not out lol) has been diagnosed with cancer. I've not been able to talk to anyone about it because my parents don't know she exists. My mother could have a reoccurrence of cancer cells and my brother could have some sort of tumour. Basically, its been a rather traumatic time. 'Little T's' from childhood and a combination of the 'Bigger T's' have sent my brain funky. I'll look in the mirror and very often feel what I am seeing doesn't reflect me. I didn't realise that this has a name. I've become a lot more anxious and almost fearful in general- if someone says they've been to the doctors I fear the worst. I guess everything's either black or white? I don't know, I think a combination of many things have meant my brain isn't very good :). I'm trying to talk to my parents about me going to the doctors about the anxiety. It's not like a 'AHHHHHHHHHHH' but it's stopping me from doing things. Anyway, thanks


I think I have this and it gets annoying, I can't pay attention to anything because my mind is always somewhere else. I'm in 10th grade and it's important that I get good grades to go to a good school next year (I live in Norway so the school system is different) and aaah what do I do


I love Kati... so now I must subscribe to you too


this video was really important thank you :)


I feel like sometimes I have this for like 5 seconds a month it's really weird


I HAVE JUST FOUND THIS CHANNEL I LOVE IT


BTW that marble metaphor helped me make so much sence out of my condition.


....this sounds kinda like how i feel, but i have never been diagnosed with it. i have been told i have anxiety and depression and even once ptsd, but none of them encapsulated how i feel in my body? like for me i can never relate to my own name, and my face feels like it belongs to someone else, and i feel like i'm sort of floating most of the time? i think i have to research this further, because this all sounds so familiar.


Can depersonalization distort memories? Regarding my last comment on here about a shirt appearing on my bed when I turned around, I don’t remember putting it there, I only remember getting my trousers out of my closet. Is there any explanation? Please help. Im doubting everything right now. I seriously need help😭


i rememeber that once i was 90ft up i was told i had to jump i just froze and cried then struggled to breath...is that depersonilation??


I'm not sure if I have this. I have never been good at telling how longg something has lasted. It could have been 2 minutes or 2 hours I can never tell. I feel like I need someone with me to tell me how long it has been. I have always felt dazed and most of the time I sort of don't know what's going on. When I'm with a large group of people I especially feel as though I'm not really there. And when I feel like I'm in a dream and I'm having a good time with people I try to force myself to be in the moment so I remember everything that happened the next day. And I usually can't recall anything but bits and pieces.


Can you only get this only when you're happy and feel perfectly fine


I think I’ve been having this lately. I have no money to pay for help so I sit inside my house depressed and lonely. Need to fix my life by my self and make my brain happy. Been depressed for over 25 years maybe more


Does anyone here have any advice for helping someone suffering from depersonalisation? My cousin is suffering from it and she asked for my help


I hate some noises. They make me scream or screech. Some noises make me cry, and people think I'm strange but I can't help it. I do it in movie theaters or in class, and I get so embarrassed or ashamed that I start spacing out and blanking on everything to ignore people.


I am not sure whether or not I have DR or just brain fog from anxiety/racing thoughts.  Because it seems as if DR/DP is more of a dream like state. For me I feel fine and alive I just can’t stop thinking and have racing thoughts about life and how everything makes sense.  I did some research related to some issues I have including BAD EYESIGHT and BAD NASAL AREA.  I suffer from poor eyesight and from a deviated septum.  I found that poor eye sight without wearing contacts or glasses can wear down your brain for example looking at screens or too much at once.  Your brain can be overwhelmed and not know how to process it all at the same time which can lead to brain fog and confusion.  The nose part of it was about SINUSITIS a nasal infection around the cavities outside the nose.  It can lead to brain fog and confusion as well as anxiety and stress! <br>So in short I think some people thinking they are dealing with DR/DP may actually be dealing with brain fog and stress/anxiety related issues.  Especially if you feel fine just can’t stop your racing thoughts or anxiety.  I know not all of you have these vision or nasal issues but if you do take this into consideration! I’m going to see if treatment for one of the two helps at all !

I am not sure whether or not I have DR or just brain fog from anxiety/racing thoughts.  Because it seems as if DR/DP is more of a dream like state. For me I feel fine and alive I just can’t stop thinking and have racing thoughts about life and how everything makes sense.  I did some research related to some issues I have including BAD EYESIGHT and BAD NASAL AREA.  I suffer from poor eyesight and from a deviated septum.  I found that poor eye sight without wearing contacts or glasses can wear down your brain for example looking at screens or too much at once.  Your brain can be overwhelmed and not know how to process it all at the same time which can lead to brain fog and confusion.  The nose part of it was about SINUSITIS a nasal infection around the cavities outside the nose.  It can lead to brain fog and confusion as well as anxiety and stress!
So in short I think some people thinking they are dealing with DR/DP may actually be dealing with brain fog and stress/anxiety related issues.  Especially if you feel fine just can’t stop your racing thoughts or anxiety.  I know not all of you have these vision or nasal issues but if you do take this into consideration! I’m going to see if treatment for one of the two helps at all !


I had weird episodes when I felt like I was dreaming but only like 5 times


I don't know what it is, but I'm going through a small episode right now that's kinda similar. I feel disconnected from my senses. I hear others speaking to me, and I hear myself reply, but I don't even notice my mouth moving, I don't feel it moving. I can see fine, and recognize myself, but I don't feel myself walk. It's like I'm stuck in my head surrounded by so much haze that my brain can't find itself. Like all of my functions are running themselves while I'm in my head trying to find a way to sort everything back out. I just don't know what to do. My episodes usually aren't bad, just really minor derealization where everything just feels kinda off, like I'm living my day, but in a dream. I haven't had an episode like this since I was like 8 years old. That was half of my lifetime ago. I didn't understand it then, I was at a carnival, I thought it was just because I had motion sickness from all the rides I went on. I don't know what to do about it right now. I guess I'll just stick through and watch videos so I can distract myself enough that it begins to fade back to normal... Hopefully...

I had remembered that this video existed and came back to it, but didn’t remember that I had ever commented. I’m sobbing right now. I’ve been going through really bad episodes for the past year or so. I had completely forgotten how early I started feeling like this. I honestly thought it had been a couple months, but it’s been going on for years. I can almost never remember my emotions from the past, so I always assume that the way I’m feeling is recent. I don’t even know how to process finding this post.

It’s just… not only was I feeling this way when I was 16, but I also used to be able to remember how I felt when I was 8? I have almost no memories from before high school anymore. I can be reminded of stuff, but for the most part, it’s like everything was buried away. I can’t process that I didn’t used to be like that. But I also can’t process that it didn’t start recently.


Im really sorry that i cant relate to you but this video helped me to understand, thanks!


Sometimes I suddenly just feel really down. Like I'll be laughing or something and then suddenly I just feel sad. Often in times when I SHOULD be happy like at family gatherings or something I get down. Or nearly every time I am alone. Is this depression? Idk plz help :3


I feel like I have a mild case of all three


I wish wish wish dodie was my older sister and could give me a hug whenever I am sad and I would give her a hug when she felt very bad as well😖💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕


Dodie, do you take medication and do therapy? Or just therapy?


i feel like nothing is real around me. i know that i’m real, but nothing else feels real. i feel like i’m moving around in a fake world and working towards the day i get to live in the “real” world. anyone else?


Does anyone know if this is hereditary? I haven’t finished the video yet, but it’s just a genuine question because my sister experienced this for her entire life and i hadnt until I smoked for the first time but now It happens all the time

I also feel like i don’t recognize pain the way I usually do and have to be extra careful with myself because it doesnt hurt the way it’s supposed to. It’s almost like my pain sensors are lowered


Does anyone else start randomly laughing during their episodes?


Let me start off by saying that I'm Sorry for not commenting on any of your videos for what seems like forever. A lot of what you share is above my pay grade and I refuse to comment just to comment. In my heart, you Will find happiness, but to say how and to guess when would only make me sound like, idk, a clueless ass. I still believe that the future is bright and you will be quite pleased with what lies ahead. Until then, all I have is that you are Loved beyond measure and that you are Not Alone. Never have been and Never will be. What inspired this comment was that I saw you on Gabbies Vlog and 1) the World just got a little bit smaller, but more importantly, 2) I Loved seeing you laughing and smiling. That's it. I wish you nothing but the best and I look forward to the next time I can comment on your smiling face. Stay Awesome.  A fan from Chicago   :  )


when i tried to explain to my therapist that i felt like this she would tell me “you’re just having panic attacks, it’ll go away by themselves” yet it’s been almost 6 months & i feel so much worse. i don’t even recognize myself. i feel like i’m living a dream but its so uncomfortable and i don’t even feel anything , it’s so weird and i can’t explain it to my mom because i’m scared she’s not gonna believe me or understand & i just need someone to talk to because i feel like i’m alone. i have no more friends because i can’t hang out with them and i can’t be happy , and whenever i would tell them about how i felt they would think i’m crazy , i feel like i’m going insane and i can’t talk to anyone and that’s what makes it so much worse. i’m terrified that i’ll have to live like this for the rest of my life. i’m so scared i just need someone who understands how i feel.

I know how you feel. I had this for about 2-3 years  but it just recently got better which I never thought it would. Looking back, it's hard too explain how it felt sometimes during it because most of it feels like it was just a dream, but I know I felt dead and it was the worst time of my life. I wasn't able too hang out with my friends due to the fact I wasn't happy and I wasn't able too miss them because I felt nothing and felt no connection too anything or anyone. My grandma and dad passed away, but I didn't care because it didn't feel real. I couldn't feel sad about it. My mom would tell people that i was depressed, but when I told my mom about what I was actually going through, she called me crazy and said if I left the house more I wouldn't be like this. I dropped out of school,  I barely left the house, I couldn't enjoy music, shows or anything a person without this would enjoy. But it got better, I don't know how, but it did. My advice too you would be talk too your mom or somebody. Explain exactly what your going through and make them understand that it's not just a panic attack or whatever else they try and say it is. Though it got better for me, I wish I would have got help, it was just too hard for me too listen too people trying too tell me what's wrong with me or saying I'll get over it. Though not having people understand what you're going sucks and it's hard, try and get help. I hope you do what's best to get better and hopefully my story made you feel less alone.

Sorry for making this so long. I honestly could have wrote a whole book about how this disorder/mental illness has affected me.


There is a name to this? I told my mom when I started feeling like this randomly and she told me I was just tired. How do I get it to stop?


So what do you do if u have talked through it all and it didnt change anything mentally


I have all of this but I haven't had any childhood trauma's


bipolar people like myself experience something similar but far more frightening-a waking dreamstate which is fine if one is alone but constant torture if one is subject to the whims of others

not direct at folks, it's a warning to the traitors at the MOSAD, CIA, NSA, DOD, MI1-infinity, KGB, GRU, MOSAD, the house of SAUD, duterte, bolonara, putin putin putin putin putin trump, oh vey.<br>(disclaimer:gfy)

not direct at folks, it's a warning to the traitors at the MOSAD, CIA, NSA, DOD, MI1-infinity, KGB, GRU, MOSAD, the house of SAUD, duterte, bolonara, putin putin putin putin putin trump, oh vey.
(disclaimer:gfy)

ps. kishelemukong clan own all ur base, we want our shit back

family and friends especially, the worst part of mental license is the license it gives others to do what they will, all they must do is hint at ur mental problems and they can get away with anything, that is a serious downside to having so much literal control over reality-experience IS reality, it's all real, this isn't a dream i wish it were

sorry to lecture but i've got serioous ptsd and it seems to happen at certain times of the year, hail LUNA


I have derealization but not depersonalization. I don’t see someone else when I look in the mirror, I just feel like we’re living in a simulation and I’m the only one who’s cognitive about anything. Think of it like playing Grand Theft Auto, you’re the only real person playing a character and all the other people are computers

Hey can u help me out I think I might have derealization cause when I went to a school trip we went swimming and we got out and I felt like I was not there like I was dreaming or dead even if I don’t know what death feels like . I could’ve walk properly and my voice sounded so weird


pleaseeeee make an internet support group kinda like dan howell! love yoouuu


This was interesting never heard of that before


DO A VIDEO SHOWING THEIR TATOOS AND TELLING REASONS


Why do I sometimes feel like I've lost all emotions for a bit like im an empty husk with a collection of fake made up emotions.


i’ve done EDMR therapy with my therapist


I have this and I'm very scared. Every morninh when I'm waking up I feel like in a dream
It scares me very much, I can't breath very well bc I have so much stress in my head
I hate it!


I think I learned something about myself for this


can you make another channel where we can see how you play ur songs. like ''you", all the chords online don't sound anything like the original. so that could be awsome hihi :)


I got depersonalisation last night it felt like my soul was hiding behind my eyes and it felt like my head was hollow and i slept it off and i dont feel depersonalisation at all idk if it is going to come back or not


she reminds me so much of my therapist lmao


i think i have depersonalization/derealization
i have gone through trauma for the past yearish
i feel like i'm not really me and i'm reading a book?
like i can't control anything i'm just observing everything that happens.
anyone know which this is?


I have an unlabeled (my therapist doesn’t have enough information) compulsion disorder and sometimes i’ll look away from something and something happens in my brain and I can’t look away or a have took look away because I feel like something is wrong and it normally causes me to have a mini freak out or panic. Ex. Today at dinner I was sitting and I looked up from my plate at my dad and the light in the kitchen behind him was off and it made everything look off (almost zoomed out a blurry) and it made me panic and I almost cried and I kept saying that I didn’t like it/that even though part of my brain was just like “Emma calm down it’s a light” the other part was just screaming in a corner “YOU CANT SEE. WTF IS GOING ON. EVERYTHING IS WRONG”

So that’s my brain. And it’s possibly the thing that embarrasses me the most. I’m constantly freaking out one second and completely calm the next because my logic brain will just turn off my emotional brain until it can calm the fuck down and stop panicking and everyone thinks I’m a psychopath


this was a really helpful video!!! thank u dodie


THIS WAS EXCELLENT IM DEFINITELY SUBBING HER


It's the worst feeling, when you feel like you're dreaming and you're not a real person


I have anxiety also. Is it an aspect of anxiety disorder or something entirely to its on?


I think I have this but I don't know how to deal with it. I go to a therapist but only since a few weeks so I don't trust her yet. No one in my family or friendgroups understands this. I suffer from anxiety and really bad depression to. This derealization makes the depression even worse..


I’m questioning myself bee cause I always space out and miss bits of conversations, this gets worse when I get bored or when I’m tired. Is this just daydreaming or...

Little did i know that Maladaptive Daydreaming was a thing


Is it bad at this point that I like being able to mentally clock out? It's protection for me at this point


I also thought that dissociation is like your brain in stress is like well,,, if you ain't leaving I sure am lol bye enjoy your exam xox


Ok idk if I have this or not and I'm kinda confused. Not all the time but sometimes I feel like nothing around me is real, like no one is real, everything seems like props or a dream or like a vision and my body and all my movements feel really forigen, but it usually only happens about once or twice a week for about 6 hours at a time (the longest its ever gone on was a day and a half)  then it feels fine again, I always feel really uncomfortable when it happens and I don't know what to do.


Sometimes I feel like life isn’t real or if I have an experience with someone later i know it happened but I feel like it didn’t.  I wouldn’t say it happens all the time though.  I didn’t know it happened to anyone else

I can see how it would be related to trauma though because it usually happens when I don’t want to deal with something going on in my life


I always feel like my body isn’t my body!


Can you feel like both your environment and your self are not real? I feel like nothing is real except for my own consciousness. I also feel like I'm being watched by a higher being who isn't in this fake reality I'm in.


Anyone else find it hard to wear your glasses because it emphasizes the feeling of being like stuck and you don't react fast to things your very slow? I have a hard time driving to because idk how to tell how far things are 😠


I just cut my hair short af and this is absolutely unrelated but now I'm happy


i love you make mental heath videos but sadly ones like this hit so close to hope that i feel weirded out that I'm watching them and that i have chosen to watch them I've kinda got depersonalisation in the sense of if I'm typing or reading or anything to do with a world building sort of thing my hand aren't mine and I'm just there looking at them freaking out that there are hands typing infant of me the sam with my feet, but anyway main point its very helpful and i love you


Dodie please cover Matt Maltese's new song called "Comic Life" it's great!


Can't believe I get to meet you at your Manchester book tour😭💛


Honestly I don’t think TMS is going to do much for her. I have a neurosurgeon client who’s somewhat a pioneer in the TMS field here in Asia, and although he has told me it has some beneficial and immediate effects for patients with Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s- and I’ve seen the before and after videos- I’ve not heard of it being used for depression or anxiety. it’s a bit of a placebo treatment, utilized by many in the neurological field when they don’t know what else to put on the table. I wouldn’t put too much stock in its efficacy esp as her condition is more likely to be pathological. I think what she needs is time for her brain to heal, and possibly a good therapist,  not medicine.


the woman is sooo cute I loved her body language and facial expressions and her soothing way of talking


I have a couple of dissociation moments but they happen so randomly and I don't know if it's the same?? They really are just at random moments, like I was lying in bed watching Netflix and suddenly I felt like my brain left my body? like I was watching myself, watching netflix?? But it only lasts a couple of seconds. I really wanna know what it is and if it is the same because its frickin terrifying.


Omg I never new this was a thing I thought it was just me!!! I just thought I was crazy


When you guys are trying to sleep do you ever get the feeling that your slowing sinking or like disappearing and it’s like freaky so you can’t sleep cuz that happens to me and I have both. I can’t sleep at night cuz it’s a freaky feeling that my whole body is numb.


I personally had a terrible experience with Zoloft as well. Terrible headaches issued, so I had to be taken off it for one week before trying something else out.


i wish talk therapists were more like this woman


i got it i was the medic that responded to my parents car accident


I had to literally pause this video so many times and go back because my brain would go somewhere else


idk if this is like really mellow depersonalization but recently when i look in the mirror i dont feel like myself ?? who knows lmao


Ok  When i was growing up i often feel like this  "When i was looking at people i ask myself alot of questions , are they real? how they become who they are, Is this chair real?  How is that possible?  What is important being alive? It seems and it feels that everything i see is not real it feels like I'm not real I'm just dreaming ,One day my parents noticed that  my father ask my mama, "Have you notice our son always dumbfounded?" Cuz I'm thinking about this all the time,  Then until my senior high school it became worse,  I tried to play my mind because I was always thinking like this  I don't even know why  I'm thinking like that.    then i became like crazy like I was not who i am, I'm always thinking negative all the time  that i could  not stop it anymore, that year was ugly and i was so fuck up.     After graduated in Highschool before i got to college "I told myself i need to change  i need to get myself back" I go through life fixing it by myself without google without internet to research to   fixing this fucking thinking in my head , that i don't even know by focusing and be energetic in life and just go go! even i still had  this thing in my head that never go away until now i'm 26.   I graduated college  4 years i took a course  that i did not like, because my grade in my last year in high school was so fuck up also that i don't have a choice to pick that course cuz ,that's the only available for my grade.  Surprisingly my college life was great  i met awesome people that likes to laugh, "When i laugh i feel good i feel confident i feel happy i feel positive"  So i was laughing always  as much as possible with my good classmates! luckily they like to laugh too, they don't judge me by laughing that hard. there is a lot of story in my college. What i learn in those days "LAUGHING IS REALLY THE BEST MEDICINE WELL MY BEST MEDICINE"   then after college  i was lonely  again i was sad cuz i know i can't go to  school anymore, i will never see them again, those happiness was done. i missed them so much i know they move on.  After that after  3 years at home i tried to get a job , I worked as  a teller  in tollgate then after 4 months  i got job again i worked as an operator in a factory for 5 months. Now I'm in my parents home again.. I became so much better by doing alot of things like reading books , watching youtube, bulding skill, trying something new, self development, always watching motivation.  That fucking thing is  always in my head sometimes its gone  sometimes it comes again never go away completely.  So that's my story i just wanna share, I realize today i think i got that "Deep thinking"  by being alone and not so active  when i was a kid.  Not so busy on the outside world.  I wish i can turn back the time.


oh. OH. wait. so thats. oh no i thought it was alexithymia this whole time but absolutely everything described is EXACTLY what its like for me oh NO


I use a rubik's cube as a fidget toy, and it works really well!


sometimes when im in class suddenly i feel like im in a dream or im like a ghost between ppl that feeling happens to me rarly


That marble metaphor I'm crying that is so real


No way I must have discovered Kati through u dodie


You should react to in a heartbeat even tho it’s kinda less relevant now but still beautiful.


I watched this when you first posted it because I was a fan but now I have it and wanna learn more oops


why did i cry throughout this entire video


Where are u dodie we miss you 🌷 i hope ure happy and healthy and enjoying life 😍


Hey is there a way we can talk? I was just recently diagnosed with this


Zoloft did that to me too even at only 20 mg


Hi, um I know this isn't necessarily the best place to go to for help haha, but I just don't know what's going on. I space out so badly to the point of not being able to think at all. Or if it's worse another day, it's to the point where I don't feel like I'm here. I've tried meditation and grounding techniques, and they don't help. I get so scared because i start to question my own sanity. It's much like a dream state and sometimes I just feel like I'm in the background or disconnected from my body, almost like someone looking in. My doctor diagnosed me with depression and anxiety, but then my therapist said that I sounded like the poster child for ADHD in teenage girls. I've been on ADHD stimulants since then, but those only seem to worsen my spacing out moments. They do help me hyper focus, but that's about it. I just don't know if it's derealization or if it's actually ADHD? I explained my spacing out to my therapist and she had never heard of it before, or it being that bad. I just feel hopeless. My grades are dropping and I just can't seem to pull it together. I have experienced trauma, I guess you'd say. My mother is verbally, emotionally, and at times physically abusive. I've had a lot happen and I just feel lost. I'm hoping someone could give me advice or something because I don't know what to do anymore. I love you all.


Literally the two cutest women in the world! :3


what do you do when grounding doesn't work?


dodie you should make a video entirely in your best american accent


What is it when you feel bored at things that you know aren’t boring that you used to like and in convos cant focus and just give off a false reaction that u think the other person wants


So the marble part on how a trauma shoots through all the memories ever had can it misconstrue the events ?


I think I have Depersonalization/ de realisation tbh :(


(Asking other people with DP/DR). Do you ever feel like other people don’t actually exist but you have strange realization that there are people. Like I totally lack the feeling of sonder. Is it just me?


So now that’s I’m 21 and been dealing with somethings I think I’ve got derealization
I look in the mirror and maybe I just explain it differently than others but it’s not like I’m not looking at me. Cuz like. I know it’s me but I can’t remember what I look like off the top of my head
And sometimes my body feels like it’s an incorrect picture of me. Like if someone drew a really realistic picture of me but it’s kinda off in some ways.
And I’m constantly disratiing myself with like. Idk. I have no memory but mostly scrolling. Another thing, I have zero memory.
Some extra issues cuz I need to vent sorry:
And I have zero passion for anything. And I can’t take care of myself. And I’m spending literally all my money. And my jobs giving me less hours w a new manager.


Is to possible to have small episodes and really long episodes, of a mental disorder? Like you can just be feeling fine them slip into an episode and it last for a bit and then it just go and then come back?


I was just watching this video. I kind of had some realizations like shit, what the fuck is really wrong with me. So I kind of had a breakdown because of that realization. Now I'm so scared that I think that someone is watching me. Help.


does any1 else find it where u feel like ur in a similulation?


Does anyone have like feeling where everything feels wrong and different and just off and you can’t think or feel because everything is wrong so that a symptom of depersonalization or that?


I don't know who I am anymore.like I don't know what "I" means when I recall my past memories of myself I feel as if that was someone else and right now I am someone else .when I meet my relatives I feel I have changed as if they are not meeting me as if they are meeting someone else.so is this depersonalization?  Also I have never faced any trauma in my life neither have I done drugs all I know is that I feel terrible and depressed because I want to be normal. Can a vitamin deficiency cause this? Please answer


can you pretty please do a cover of Sweater Weather by the Neighborhood?!?!?!?!?


I don't recognize my face.... it's really strange. I don't think I have the feeling of dreaming, I just look at myself and don't see myself in the mirror. I try explain it to my friends and they don't understand what I'm saying but nothing really has happened to spark any of this recently but I do now understand the 'little Ts' thing, it makes sense. I don't know really, I just came back here because I forgot what these were about


i feel like im just here sometimes and that its like a dream that im just living if that makes sense. marijuana makes it worse.


so it makes sense now
i was crying on my pillow and was wiping my tears then suddenly it occured to me that why do i even have 5 fingers? like who is making me inhale air when i dont want to?
its just random questions that just messes my mind


Have you watched the movie 'Numb' starting Matthew Perry? it's all about depersonalisation.


I really wish I'd seen this a few years ago


woah i also get depersonalisation what, when i look in the mirror sometimes i don’t know who that is


Mostly I just feel numb to it, and if not then in some sort of negation, I’ve been there so long I don’t even realize about anymore?


HOLY FEEAKING HELL!!!!! MY TWO FAVORITE PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


What if you have Depersonalization derealization  and asbergers n depression/anxiety :/ I feel so detached and like an alien. I'm going to the doctor again later this month I hope they can help me :( I've been thinking if I cant get help maybe suicide might  be the only realistic way out...


I literally knew I recognized her from somewhere in Shane’s video (other than her channel) and THIS WAS IT OMG


So it's like your fight or flight instincts kick in you definitely don't want to fight but have nowhere to flee to so your brain is like imma just leave now bye peace out huh I think I have that sometimes


everytime i dissociate i have to close my eyes bc my sight doesnt match up with feeling and hesring


woah. rewatching this after shane's series on jake paul and DOCTOR MORTON


The comment sections here are so respectful aww


I get depersonalisation  and derealisation but I don't (to my knowledge) have any trauma?? Like I have no clue what caused this


God I never realised Kati Morton was in a Dodie video.


aghh i wish i could get a therapist but it costs a lot and we don’t have the money for it
also every time i bring up my mental health which was one time what am i saying my parents are like oh you shouldn’t self diagnose (which i understand) it’s probably fiiiiine you’re a teenager puberty goes paired with things like that
but what i’m too scared to tell them is how bad it really is and okay i’ll stop writing now this is too long if anyone actually read this 1. thank you 2. do you have any tips


AFTER WATCHING SHANE’S SERIES I JUST NOTICED THAT ITS KATY OMG.


however i haven’t really been through any traumas


idk if i’m just different or it’s something else but i often feel like i take a deep enough breath, i can’t open my eyes wide enough, i feel like i’m zooming out but also trapped in my body. i know what i’m supposed to do eg. put my coat on, charge my phone but i feel very zoned out while doing so almost like i’m dreaming. i feel like i’m watching myself but i can control my actions, i just don’t feel like it’s me doing it


I used to go to this therapist (but she was kinda mean and I didn’t rly trust her (and she was a gay conversion therapist on the side 😬 not good)) and I tried explaining derealization to her. She said « maybe you just have low blood sugar »  lol. That was a rough time.


If anyone needs help and advice from an ex-DP sufferer, reply and ill tell you how we can talk, ( i will help you get rid of it for good)


Got depersonalization from a bad weed trip


can dodie be the 13th doctor's companion pls


I feel all this in the comments but I feel like I’m unreal and like I’m not there/ I don’t exist what bothers me is I can’t explain it


I always feel like I am watching myself in a 3rd person view


i get this when i get super super high :/ i feel really bad when people get this everyday, i can’t imagine. feels like i’m in a dream and i don’t know what’s real and what’s not


Please look at Emotional Freedom Technique it is very good


I just realized this is the lady from Shane's video 😁❤


DODIE ITS THE FIRST BIT BACK AT SCHOOL WHERE ARE YOU TO GIVE ME EMOTIONAL SUPPORT


not recognising your friends and family is the worst part. the only way i can describe it is like every time you look at them they have a different face. you know who they are and you have memories of them but you can’t see them there. it’s terrifying.


I’m so confused :( I’m just trying to figure out what it was I experienced for 10 years


I think I might have this... but I don't know... like if I'm hanging out with my friends and something happens that upsets me I just clock out.. is that the same thing?


I have to fidget with something spikey in my hands while driving or in a more crowded space like a store so I don’t completely float away. Now I know im not alone. Ummm I’m so grateful to have found you. Now what!?


oh my gosh i have disrealisation this is so weird woah


mine is so bad I can't even process what people are saying to me when they're trying to help me come down from it.


I'm not sure if anyone is going to see this, but if you do and have dealt with this before, could you please tell me how you tell your family/doctor that you think you may have this without coming across like some kid who's just attention seeking etc? I've had symptoms of this for years and have only just recently discovered it, and I think I need to speak to someone about it. Thank you.


Sometimes I get this so bad I can’t stand up, just me?


Study. Immersion. Therapy. Diet. Personal. Nature. Bath. Heat. Good conversation.🐝


Bretahwork/Wim Hof is very effective as well. IF you are able to remember!


I feel like im spectating myself right now!


Sertraline  made it worse for me (*sertreline?)


i love how your videos have a purple tone!


I have had it for like 3 years i didnt think it was a problem until i searched it up on youtube i dont know what to do😥😭


What if you have no one to trust because I’m going through some friend problems


Omg I thought she looked familiar from Shane’s series but I couldn’t figure out why and now I know!!!


I don't know what I have like I always have time slip through my one ear and the other like I can't remember simple things like conversations I had today and when I look in the mirror for to long I look different, like not myself. Does anyone know what I have?


Could you do a cover of diving bell/ any song by super glu


I'm sobbing rn because I had no idea this stuff had a name n shit because I thought I was just going insane


Didnt realize this wasnt something everyone felt... yeesh


Idk if its appropriate to say , given the context of the video but the girl in the glasses looks a lot like Fran Menses (she is an artist on YouTube)


omg i was one of the very few people tha had it thanks


"All we can do is leave in our brain"<br>This hits me.

"All we can do is leave in our brain"
This hits me.


I’ve never had either of these thank God. But unfortunately my brother had it for 3 months when he was 16. After hearing from my brother about how he felt, research, and YouTube videos. I still have no fucking idea wtf this shit is. And if someone could help me destroy my fear of getting it just by thinking about it you would legitimately be my guardian angel.

You don't want it. Was stuck in it for almost 9 years


Can you cover Never Let Me Go by Florence and the Machine?


hands up who else rewatched this cos dis sister is also featured in shane's series lol


It would be cool if you did jacksfilms fixed version of "Look what you made me do" by Taylor Swift


I can't even get in a car without panicking


OMG I HAVE DEPERSONALIZATION CONSTANTLY ALL THE TIME. NOTHING FEELS REAL. WHEN I TOUCH SOMETHING I FEEL THE SENSATION OF WHAT IT FEELS LIKE BUT DOESN'T FEEL LIKE ITS MY HAND DOING IT. THE SIGHT OF MY HAND TOUCHING IT AND THE FEELING OF THE TOUCH DON'T CLICK IN MY BRAIN. NOTHING HAS FELT REAL FOR THE PAST FEW MONTHS. ITS SO WEIRD AND SOMETIMES ITS WORSE THAN OTHERS. It probably derived from me as a child convincing myself that what was happening around me was just what I was seeing and nothing was actually happening. I managed to make myself feel like I wasn't really there. Or maybe it derived from my depression that I recently got over? I don't know... nothing feels real most of the time... what do I do

I also tend to zone out after being embarrassed or getting punished for doing something wrong or after doing something wrong in general. I haven't gone through any super traumatic events but I did have Depression and suicidal thought, though I recently got over those.


my best friend has this but not all the time, so when both of us want have something to say I will now let her go first becausre she then forgets. Ironically I will forget as well if i hear her out first so we are both screwed XD


I know this is early and nothing to do with this video but could you please do vlogmas ❤ xxx


it is better to forget it, or to accept?


Lmao people have literally thought of everything to diagnose themselves with


I've always wondered, what does her arm tattoo say?


8:57
I usually fidget with an old blunt pen knife coz it has a sharp(ish) edge, but won't hurt me.


The therapist very much reminds me of Arizona Robbins


I really wanted to watch this and the information was great, but I feel with all the jump-cuts I was missing out on info. It was really distracting.


this is the person in sahnes sociopath series!


I have derealization/depersonalization disorder and it’s a horrible struggle full of anxiety attacks and paranoia. It’s 24/7 and hasn’t gone away for since October last year. I have NO idea how to get better and get rid of it


CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHERE DODIE GOT HER GLASSES AND IF HER GLASSES ARE PRESCRIPTION GLASSES


Shit I think I have this<br>I keep spacing out and I can barely focus on anything. I just stare out into nothing and it becomes kinda blurry? idek if that's that but. and I have episodes, where I'll feel either like everything is right and I can't stop smiling and I love this world so much, theeen I'll be super depressed and can't find anything positive and it just feels like nothing. idek it's weird (and also when people touch me it feels painful sometimes)

Shit I think I have this
I keep spacing out and I can barely focus on anything. I just stare out into nothing and it becomes kinda blurry? idek if that's that but. and I have episodes, where I'll feel either like everything is right and I can't stop smiling and I love this world so much, theeen I'll be super depressed and can't find anything positive and it just feels like nothing. idek it's weird (and also when people touch me it feels painful sometimes)


How can u talk to someone about this? How can I go to my doctors or people at school to talk about this?  I feel like this may be me but I’m not sure. How should I talk to people about how I feel or not feeling?


The therapist reminds me of a patient from Scrubs so bad


dodie, how do you write a song? Im trying so hard but i cant do it. i have no inspiration on what it should be about and i have no talent with words...


I know this might seem completely random but i was wondering if you could do a cover of a song called I Built A Friend by Alec Benjamin... its a beautiful song and i think you would enjoy it too?


please upload i need to be happy and you help with that


9:00 this sounds a lot like stimming :o!


A feel like when I laugh a find it funny for a milla second then overthink it n just feel numb when I drink to everything’s goes so quick even when I don’t


am i aloud to like this video? i don't know if i should...


im so scared that God is going to end my life early because he knows I dont want to live with this forever. do you think im overthinking?


I don't want to sound like I'm self diagnosing myself because I hate when people do that but I think I should look up de realization and depersonalization because I think I might have it. All the time I will be somewhere or doing something or even just at my house and will all a sudden just be like this isn't real this is a dream or a figment of my imagination and I just thought that was some weird way I coped with my anxiety but that makes more sense and the depersonalization would help explain my gender fluidity a lot because I'll look in the mirror and won't see myself in a way like it's not what I'd seen last time if that makes any sense but yeah I just thought it was interesting and the way Dodie explained it felt like an epiphany of some sort.


I believe I have both and I'm only twelve. Is that bad?


I love you 😍 please listen to clean by Taylor swift- I’m sure you’d love it-  I love your music


DODIE WHERE DID YOU GET YOUR GLASSES PLEASE


Help I want to cut my hair like yours but a bit shorter but my mom was screaming at me bc I want to cut my hair but she won't let me what do I do


I don't know if I have it but I used hunger to try to feel but I have to eat now and I feel horrible 😖


Oh damn shes the therapist from shanes channel


where can someone buy the toys she’s talking about?


i feel like ive got a tiny bit of dissociation
but the question is
y tho
im only 12 like uh brain what the heck r u ok


Really interesting, thanks for educating me!


I feel like I suffer from these every day of my life. It really makes me depressed, but this video helped me feel a little more informed and slightly less alone. Love you Dodie ❤


I've had derealisation since I was really young but I never knew what was really happening. Lately I've just started to think it was something related to my anxiety. Thank you so much for making this video and explaining all of this it really helped.


Katiiii! I love this woman. Her videos saved my life, particularly her video on intrusive thoughts. I have severe OCD and I had a random spike in 2015 and I was very close to ending my life when I came across Kati's videos. If you're reading this Kati I want to say THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for saving my life. 💕


i love kati!!! her videos have helped me so much on my way through being diagnosed and looking for the right treatment, and also learning how and why things are the way they are. thank you kati! and also dodie! 💖💕💘💗


I've had these since I was in 5th grade and I've always been scared and confused about it and nobody thought anything was wrong with me and I've been scared ever since thank you so much for realizing I'm ok and not alone❤❤❤


I feel so lucky to have never been through anything like this. I wish you all the best Dodie. <br>I find this so interesting as I'm training to be a CBT therapist xx

I feel so lucky to have never been through anything like this. I wish you all the best Dodie.
I find this so interesting as I'm training to be a CBT therapist xx


I really appreciate this video. I only recently felt like I might be experiencing dissociation and it was very discouraging when my therapist told me it sounded like my feelings were normal when I knew it did not feel normal. she did suggest mindfulness, but it hasn't really helped so far, so it matters that dodie and kati put out more options. thank you <3


Dodie, thank you so much for making this video!! I could relate to a few things and you really helped me out. I also had EMDR and it really helped me! :)


Thank you for talking about small traumas as a cause of dp/dr. I used to feel incredibly guilty (which obviously made me feel worse) about having a mental illness because I couldn't identify what had happened to me in my life that was SO bad. 💛


Thanks so much for this! I was kind of watching it just out of interest and didn't realise how much it was going to affect me. I luckily have never experienced derealization or depersonalisation but I suffered a huge trauma when I was 15, and I think I've experienced some dissociation from that. In the 7 years since I've always felt guilty that I'm not caring enough about what happened, or I get frustrated that when I try and remember what happened and it's like seeing it through a layer of cling film. But now I have a word for why that is, and I know that it's just my brain protecting itself. Plus the explanation of traumatic memories shattering and planting themselves everywhere really resonates with me as well, so thank you for the useful explanations :)

I hope everything goes well with the treatments you're exploring, Dodie. I honestly wish you the very very best and hope you see some improvement soon ❤❤❤


Kati reminds me so much of my Thearipist. I've always been one of those people that need to understand the logical cause of things in order to deal with them and she does it in a very unpatronising and caring way ❤


Thanks for this fantastic video! During my worst stages of anxiety I experienced depersonalisation and derealisation for 3 months straight. Luckily through coping techniques and talking through my trauma I overcame it and haven't felt this way in years. You got this Dodie! ❤


She is so incredibly interesting! I could listen to her for hours. and this video kinda explains what I've been feeling for a while. ❤


Thank you dodie for this video. its great how you are using your platform to bring awareness to these mental health issues 💛


This helped so much! can't thank both of you enough! Much love ❤❤❤


I'm a student of music therapy right now, which is a relatively new kind of therapy, but it can be really useful with establishing grounding techniques and works really well, especially when used in conjunction with talk therapy, for dealing with trauma, so that might be something that you, dodie or anyone else reading, might want to look into!


Thank you so much, Dodie. I have been struggling with this for so long and it comforts me to know that I'm not the only one out there.


Wow this explains so much for me. I've struggled with all of these due to mental illness and trauma since I was a child. Thank you for this video.


It''s so wonderful to hear anyone talking about derealization on such a big platform, thank you so much.


Dodie!!! Thank you and Kati so so much for this!!! I have derealization mostly in chunks of time and usually it's when I'm stressed, and this explained so much :) Thanks so much for explaining about the trauma--I didn't know about that! I think too many things were happening so my brain just spaced out. For some reason, before this, I assumed it was brain chemistry but trauma makes sense! I really hope you get better soon :) and I hope I can work through this too <3


My doctor wanted me to try EMDR but my big-T Trauma happened 7 years ago, so I figure it'd be a bit pointless. Definitely interested in seeing how your therapies go! <3


For my Health and Social Care coursework I chose to focus on depersonalisation and bring more awareness to it. This really helps as I'm using your videos as a source!


thank you for this video....I've been taking medication and attending cbt for anxiety but now I'm wondering If I have derealisation. The idea of coming across a splinter in those panicky moments makes so much sense and I think that idea will help me cope and recognise when to calm down and move past the situation. I'll talk to my doctor about my mental health and derealisation so thank you for addressing it and normalising it for your audience, I can't stress how important you are to particularly anyone struggling with mental health :) 🐝


This was wonderful 'cause I learned so much! Thank you Dodie and Kati!


This is amazing. I truly understand and also deal with this. Dissociation is so hard and scary.


Im so happy you made this video, it made me feel not alone. Thank you!! Ive had it for a year and a half and ive built my understanding of it so much more and i cant wait to get out of this cloud.


Thank you for making this video I didn't really understand what disassociation or depersonalisation was and was confused whenever you mentioned either or both and this clears up and helps me understand what these mental illnesses are.


Schema therapy is amazing! I have tried a bunch of meds, general talk therapy, CBT, TMS, a bunch of things in an intensive outpatient program, and they helped but none as much as schema therapy.


Wow. I've spoken with therapists about my anxiety and both told me I needed to open up because i honestly could not think of a huge event in my childhood that triggered my panic attacks. Not once did anyone suggest it could have been lots of little things. Thank you Kati and dodie! I'm seeing a new therapist in a few weeks and to be honest had lost a lot of hope in 'fixing' me. Will be great to approach it with this new found knowledge.


Hey dodie - thank you so much for this video! I feel much better seeing someone else (and professional) that knows what im feeling! Thank you <3


you dont know how freeing it is to finally know what has been "wrong" with me lately. I watched the video and it was like it made click, because thats exactly what is happening to me. I am so glad you made this video and gabe information on the topic


I love this. I love Kati, she was so understanding i loved everything about this. so calming. thank you


When I was in therapy my therapist also gave me some tips and tricks for somatic experiencing. He'd ask me how I was feeling at that exact moment and then he'd ask me to locate that feeling inside my body (anxiety, for example, I mostly experience in my stomach and throat, other feelings I might feel lower in my stomach, my arms, my head etc.). He told me to try that little exercise at different times during the day. This helped me with two things I'm still so thankful for: 1. it's become much easier to recognise how I'm feeling. I can just be like "why does my stomach feel so weird?" and then I remember it's probably because I'm anxious for some reason.With that knowlege I can then decide how I can best act on that feeling. and 2. I can now recongnise patterns in how I feel, when I feel those things, which people make me feel certain things and all that. This has made it so much easier for me to recognise my anxiety and not let myself run away from it. It also helped me to not get inside my head too much. Head is for thinking, body is for feeling. (obv. not 100% true, but it's a little rule I made for myself to prevent getting caught up in feelings in my head).  This video was so great! thank you for making it!


That's so important and helpful to know three different types rather than just one. Thank you xx I have experienced derealisation and I just thought I was depressed with a migraine lol (or not) xx


I've been living in a state of dissociation/derealisation for about 1-2 years after an extremely traumatic event, and I don't hate it or have a desire to get rid of it, mainly because I have extreme anxiety and hypersensitivity too and it helps to numb it, I truly believe if I felt fully connected I wouldn't be able to cope with everyday things that for people without hypersensitivity wouldn't even think twice about- not to mention the stuff that's going on around home I surely would have had a full blown breakdown. Sure it's a pain when everyone around me is just able to take things in when I have to put effort into taking things in and appreciating it but if I didn't feel spaced out and like I was in a haze I probably wouldn't even leave the house.


Hi Dodie!

Let me first say that I love your music and your videos! They make my day better :)

Secondly, I would like to say that I'm a 20 year old Music Education student and I was wondering if music therapy could be an option that you've considered for derealization/depersonalization. I'm not a doctor, but I do strongly believe in the results that music therapy can bring. I'd like to maybe know your thoughts about it too :) Does Britain have any programs like this (I'm from Canada and I do know it's becoming more popular here)? Could this be another helpful thing for people with this disorder?

I don't want to seem bossy or anything; I'm just curious about what you think and I'd like to help in any way that I can haha.

Keep making videos Dodie and keep being an inspiration because you are doing amazing things :) Thanks :)


This video made me realize that I have had moments of derealization and depersonalization in the past. Last year, when I was at school, I just felt like I was floating through a dream that never ended. Youtube has helped me feel those emotions again and all of the sudden the feelings would go away! Something about school triggers it, but I don't know what. With depersonalization, I often, since I was very little, have felt disconnected with my body. I would look at my hands and feel weird, and try stomping my feet to make me feel connected, but nothing would work. I just felt like I was floating separate from my body. Eventually, it would pass, and I never thought much of it. Now, I can put a name to it and try to tell people how I feel! Thank you so much for making this video, it helped me a lot! <br>Lots of love!

This video made me realize that I have had moments of derealization and depersonalization in the past. Last year, when I was at school, I just felt like I was floating through a dream that never ended. Youtube has helped me feel those emotions again and all of the sudden the feelings would go away! Something about school triggers it, but I don't know what. With depersonalization, I often, since I was very little, have felt disconnected with my body. I would look at my hands and feel weird, and try stomping my feet to make me feel connected, but nothing would work. I just felt like I was floating separate from my body. Eventually, it would pass, and I never thought much of it. Now, I can put a name to it and try to tell people how I feel! Thank you so much for making this video, it helped me a lot!
Lots of love!


thank you dodie for uploading this video. I understand more about derealisation and know there are other mental diseases out in the world noticed. Maybe I do have something or maybe I don't. Overall, you made my eyes open and make me feel real for just at least some minutes.


I took Zoloft a few years ago and it made me way worse. I've tried a few other medications over the years that have really helped and made a huge difference, so I really hope you find a good fit for you! <3


Hi Dodie, I just wanted to ask you how you went about seeking help, i saw a Councillor for a while whilst at university but it reached a point where the person i was seeing believed me to be "cured" which i wasn't i've never been trialed on anything to help with my  depersonalisation(dissociation) and i've had it for about 5 years now.


Great video, this is super interesting! I experience a few of these on and off occasionally and im ok with dealing with them a lot but when I'm worse especially when I'm panicked in a situation I can't get out of I get more physical things like painful pins and needles around my face and neck and the feeling like my skin crawling, what feels like really violent shivers down my spine,  is this a form of depersonalisation or just a physical manifestation of panic? I've always just called it depersonalisation because it seems like it would be but idk, I've always been curious.

I'd like to try more types therapy though, I want to go back to talk therapy as it helped me a lot, especially with bigger things?  but I don't know if other things are worth trying more for the long term. Not excepting all the answers from youtube comments but still 😂❤


This video made me realise what i thought was me being tired, emotionally exhausted, couldnt open my eyes, post anxiety attack or just in general. I would sometimes also look in the mirror and be like is that really me? I do also sometimes look at other people in a way i have never seen before and it makes them look like a stranger when i know perfectly well who they are, so thank you so much for this video! i have spent my whole life thinking i was insane but i suppose thats who we are hahahaa :) THE MUSICALLY INSANE! :):)


Thank you for making this. I think this was a healthy and educational way of explaining what you're dealing with. Thank you for opening up about your metal health struggles and helping others to do the same.


I never thought that anyone could ever experience of understand the 'floaty' and 'spaced out' feeling I feel nearly every day. But, I now think that I'm not so alone. It's so hard to describe how I feel when I'm anxious and/or stressed, but this video described it nicely. Thanks Dodie and Kati! :) x


I'm really reluctant to say that anything's wrong with me given that I'm so young, I've never had anything traumatic happen to me and I generally have a good memory, but I looked up a list of dissociation symptoms on a very reliable health website and I related to 8 out of 10 of them.


This is a great video and, as usual, you have managed to explain everything really well, etc. My only problem is that the only advice for what I should do was that oft-repeated phrase "talk to somebody!" See, although I should probably do all that, I also probably have social anxiety too, so the very idea of talking to somebody terrifies me beyond words. What do I do?


i am soooooo happy that dodie talks about this. this helps me soooo much. just the fact you can recognize these things and not feeling alone! im soo happy with this! there are no words for the gratefullness i feel right now. i love you for that


I got a little teary at Kati's Inside Out explanation. Something hit me deep inside with that. This is such a great video Dodi!


I also have depersonalisation and derealisation, that's linked to my anxiety and things from my past. This was so helpful, especially to know that I'm not alone. My derealisation makes me panic so much and usually happens in social situations. It's so disorientating that I just have to leave the situation and go home a lot of the time.


that was so educating and well illustrated, i love it!!


this helps me understand my own experiences more, thank you <3


I cannot tell you enough how much this type of videos helped me! Really, really from the bottom of my heart thank you.


i remember seeing a post on tumblr of the behaviors of depersonalization and it hit me that this could be what was wrong with me. i researched it for like a week and saw myself in almost all of the signs. i brought it up to my mom and she didn't even ask why i thought i felt this way. all she said was "you can't believe everything you see on the internet" i'm still very sure i suffer from this. i don't even recognize myself in the mirror or pictures anymore. i almost caught myself asking my friend who this strange girl was in our group photo. i'm so so tired. and i don't know what to do.


this was super interesting to hear about, my knowledge of mental illnesses was super limited up until recently and i find learning new things like this, thought it is sad its kinda at your expense...


dodie, i'm not exactly sure what i hope to gain out of writing you this message, as i'm sure you get tons of messages like this daily. i suppose its more so for me than for you, but i really want you to know what an impact you have had on me. i have been struggling with depersonalization/derealization since i was little, but recently after a car accident was launched into it basically 24/7 for a couple of months now. its truly the scariest thing i've ever had to deal with, and there have been so many times when i have felt so completely alone and ready to give up. just seeing that you also struggle with this and that you still manage to do so much and reach so many people, honestly that keeps me going sometimes. this disorder is truly one of the most devastating things in my opinion, but you are such a bright light. so thank you, for this and for being you ❤


The bit about the marbles was SO INTERESTING AND EYE-OPENING I never thought of trauma that way. I treated it as a single marble I wouldn't stop picking up instead of something that's been shattered/dispersed through everything.


This helped a lot for me to understand what I'm told I have when ever a panic attack it's going to happen which I guess is a good thing in away because I know when I need to take myself out of something so yeah thanks 😊


i don't know what type of dissociation i suffer from but i believe it's some type of mix between derealisation and depersonalisation. when i experience it (which is quite often) it feels like a different world in my head. it's basically like i'm writing a book/a whole different universe every time i experience it. it is a continuous story but when i get tired of it or when somehow i start "writing" a new world the older one doesn't feel right anymore and it stresses me out to "force" myself to continue with the older one. everybody in my "universe" (i believe that they're called paracosmos in the literature world) has their own set story and life and thoughts and i can project myself onto any of them and "live" as them and that's how i deal with my real life issues - i make up some storyline that somehow makes my character feel in a similar way to the way i'm feeling irl and deal with it by not being myself per say. some characters are reoccurring since i was 14 (i have experienced this since i was 12 but i recall moments when i was 7/8 of very similar situations) and others die with the paracosmos i leave behind (i still remember them and their lives and all of that jazz, and sometimes i bring them back) (characters can stay alive but i change parts of their storyline and you know i make sure they fit into whatever world i picture). it is mostly triggered and stimulated by audio and visuals and when i watch a movie or a tv show and a character from those really speak to certain parts of me i almost always make sure to include parts of them in my paracosmos (i don't know if i'm expressing myself correctly). i also feel very attached and connected to them. i do lose keep track of time and sometimes space when i experience this and i do have gaps in memory because of this. i also have a really weird sense of time like it still feels like 2012 in my head (i was 12 at the time). i also experience this involuntarily when i'm in a not so positive mood and have lots of stress and anxiety or when i'm sad and all that jazz. when i'm happy it cools down a bit and i can sort of choose when to "write" it? like i know that if i listen to music when i'm happy i will dissociate and i know that if i'm walking by myself i will also do it etc. aside from this when i'm living in the real world i do experience feeling like i'm out of my body and i'm not inside of it (specially in social situations and when i have to interact with people) it feels like i'm in a movie you know? there's a lot more stuff that goes around this thing but i feel like i've written too much so i'm going to keep it to myself. also sorry if there are any mistakes i'm not a native english speaker x


YAY KATI!!!! I can't believe you two collabed!!! This made me so happy when I saw this video in my sub box


Hi! I have a question/need advice:<br>I took a math test yesterday and as I started getting more stressed because of time, I could feel myself getting more and more sucked away. After I came to terms with the fact that I wasn't gonna finish it, I decided to do the easy ones on the back, but I couldn't even remember how to do a simple factoring problem. My mind wasn't there at all. I was wondering how to fix this/bring my mind back when this happens? When it does come back after I get out of that situation, panic attacks come on because everything rushes at me at once. Any ways to bring my mind back to focus WHILE it happens, then not get flooded afterwards?

Hi! I have a question/need advice:
I took a math test yesterday and as I started getting more stressed because of time, I could feel myself getting more and more sucked away. After I came to terms with the fact that I wasn't gonna finish it, I decided to do the easy ones on the back, but I couldn't even remember how to do a simple factoring problem. My mind wasn't there at all. I was wondering how to fix this/bring my mind back when this happens? When it does come back after I get out of that situation, panic attacks come on because everything rushes at me at once. Any ways to bring my mind back to focus WHILE it happens, then not get flooded afterwards?


Hi Dodie, do you think you would be able to keep the text on the screen for a little longer if possible? I never have time to read it all! 🙈 love your videos and thank you for posting stuff like this. I don't suffer from any mental health disorders, but I always find it so interesting hearing about it from a first hand experience!


This is super interesting and it actually helped me understand a few things about myself.


I had a really intense period of time when I had insomnia for more than 3 weeks, was even unable to catch up on sleep on the weekends, which was something that always kept me from going too far over the side of the cliff, - I was at the point I would fall asleep for brief moments at my desk at work and I was hearing voices and having moments where I didn't know where I was or how I got there, and I felt very spacey and out of it - and one time, I had a moment when I looked at myself in a mirror and didn't recognize myself. As horrible as it was, somehow it actually threw me for such a loop, I actually addressed the problem. I took a week off of work and just, basically self-cared because I can't afford a doctor but it really helped and I  hope that never happens again.


wow I've had derealization and depersonalization and I didn't know what was wrong but this helped me out so so much. I just didn't feel like I was there and I didn't feel like I was my self. I have more memories with my derealization because it used to happen A LOT. I never knew what was wrong. During those "episodes" I don't like talking to anyone because it makes me feel more out of myself. Thank you soooo much


I don't have depersonalisation or derealisation but watching this was really interesting and really quite soothing. I feel like when I come to a mental block I can use some of these tips so thank you :-)


last year I had severe depersonalisation. just like you say in the video I would look at my hands and face and not recognize myself, it was terrifying, so terrifying that I couldn't even look in the mirror because I wouldn't recognize the person staring back. I remember looking down as I was walking and there were just legs walking, they were my legs, but I couldn't process that. I also felt derealisation but not as severely as depersonalisation. not knowing what this was, was so so scary and I didn't know how to fix it. now a year later I have researched and figured out how to help it and though I don't have it as severely I still get depersonalised sometimes. <br>thankyou for making people aware of these things Dodie and for telling the world how you're feeling because not many people are brave enough to do so, you're really a blessing.

last year I had severe depersonalisation. just like you say in the video I would look at my hands and face and not recognize myself, it was terrifying, so terrifying that I couldn't even look in the mirror because I wouldn't recognize the person staring back. I remember looking down as I was walking and there were just legs walking, they were my legs, but I couldn't process that. I also felt derealisation but not as severely as depersonalisation. not knowing what this was, was so so scary and I didn't know how to fix it. now a year later I have researched and figured out how to help it and though I don't have it as severely I still get depersonalised sometimes.
thankyou for making people aware of these things Dodie and for telling the world how you're feeling because not many people are brave enough to do so, you're really a blessing.


Dodie, how brave you were at Vidcon. I took my 12 year old daughter to see you on the mental health panel, at her request. She is so inspired by you. Thank you for sharing and being so brave. You help so many young people to talk about mental health. I look forward to watching  your journey with my daughter. X


I've been dealing with dissociation and depersonalisation disorder for over a year now. I was scared to watch this video, because Dodie has always been my escape from everything. The world is so unfair for making her feel the same things and struggling with this condition the same way I and many people do. This video was very informative and super accurate, good job girls 👏🏻💕 I still felt hopeless after watching this, like I always do when it comes to dissociation. I just feel like there is no cure for this. Nothing ever works. I feel like I will never feel alive again and I will never get back the contact to myself that I once lost. I don't know who I am, I only know who I once was. But that person in the past is not me anymore. I just wish everything would end and I found myself again. It will be over, but I'll always be asking "when?"


I immediately recognised Kati from that one Always open episode that I put in my then-newly-established "Important things" playlist. So now I have a ton of collab videos in my watch later playlist... Time to get to watching ~


one of the first medications I tried was Zoloft, and it didn't work for me at all. I've been on medication since I was about 13 or 14, and I didn't find (what I think is) the right medication until I was about 16, and even now, my doctor checks with my medication and considers changing my "cocktail" of meds! :) i'm afraid of therapies like TCMS because I'm not really familiar with it and I'm afraid that it will be dangerous! I've only tried CBT, and I didn't feel like it worked for me. I am trying a new therapist at the end of the month, though, so we'll see how that goes!


As someone who also suffers from derealisation and depersonalisation and is constantly told by therapists, "I don't know what's wrong with you," or "I don't know how to help you", this video was endlessly helpful for me. Thank you ❤


i've struggled with derealisation, depersonalisation and dissociation for years now alongside depression, anxiety and ptsd. i've tried a crazy amount of psychs and therapy styles as well as being inpatient. im on the up now, still struggling with derealisation, depersonalisation and dissociation as well as bouts of depressive episodes and anxiety but im getting there. seeing you talk about something that doesnt get a lot of attention in mental health communities is really refreshing. i was super nervous seeing this in my sub box that you might say some incorrect information or whatever but im really pleased with this video thank you so much for making it dodie x


Thank you so much for this video! It was really helpful to me and interesting to me, thank you thank you ❤❤


I have a few kinda medium-sized rather recent traumas, and my therapist did this emdr-esque thing with me when I was having like, constant derealization and flashbacks multiple times a day for weeks where we'd talk about it and then when I'd get too deep and start not to be there she'd stop me and we'd talk about something that gives me comfort in really vivid detail. It was incredibly helpful and my flashbacks basically stopped after that, even though the stimulus that was causing them got worse.


Curious to know your feelings on are there any folks more prone to this type of thing than others? I'm thinking maybe say high-achieving creative types, or is it across the board and we're all equally prone do you think?


I'd really recommend trying schema therapy! I've just done some training for it in London and it's a really incredible and effective model of therapy, especially for traumas (of all sizes)


thank you. i really needed to hear this today, knowing that im not alone and that what i feel is valid <3


Wow this video was so good and helpful??? The smashed marble analogy really resonates with me as someone who didn't really have one big trauma but rather several small ones over time.


When I got trama last year in my freshmen year and my way to cope was talking to myself which then turned into a "imaginary friend". This friend then began becoming abusive (since they were my own thoughts) and kept me up at night. I haven't talked about it with anyone cause I'm 15 and I feel like they'll think I've gone mad...


Thank you so much for explaining, now i understand it better and i dont feel like a drama queen or something anymore


Wow! I didn't know that was a thing! I don't deal with it anymore but for a while when I spoke I didn't recognize my own voice it was very alarming and very uncomfortable. Glad to know there is a term for that if it ever sparks up again


I experience derealization because of a major traumatic experience and sometimes it gets so bad where I become basically unresponsive because I'm just so spaced out and it leads to people getting angry at me because I don't respond to them and when I'm so spaced out it can be scary when someone is yelling at me while I feel like nothing is real.


I've never been diagnosed with mental illness, but I feel like the past two years have held a plethora of mental difficulties, not necessarily disorders in long term. But recently I feel like I'm no longer going through a really rough time (up until now life felt like too much and I couldn't handle it and I was crying and yelling and all over the place) now I feel like time is passing with me being totally neutral and sedated to it, like I'm not actually experiencing anything. I don't seem to get bored anymore because I feel like I'm ten miles away from my own mind whenever it happens. Weird, anyone else have this happen?


I have only felt de realisation a couple of times but it was weird that people describe it like a dream to me because in my dreams, I was always watching myself and NOTHING felt real whilst when I experiences de realisation, I could totally feel myself. I was in tune with myself and what I was feeling and thinking, it was just like everything else around me had turned into a dream. The sky would look painted, I couldn't feel or hear things as well and it's like I just zoomed back into my own brain. Most of it was actually caused by me just only thinking about myself for a while to come to terms with whatever the fuck had just happened to my brain. It was a lot more constant when I was much younger and it didn't seem to be caused by anything, now I hardly get it, now I just get depressed....Yaaaaay. Haha...ha.


It took me 2 years to get a doctor to take me seriously when I described my DPD symptoms. Some even laughed at me and said I just need for sleep... After one doctor referred me, it took another year to be referred to a mental health nurse after which I had to wait 6 months for my first session. It didn't work - so they put me on Sertraline, despite me requesting not to go on it.

I'm sure this worsened my symptoms and has put me in a frame of mind where seeking treatment is futile, so I haven't, even though my medications don't work and I feel worse than I have done for 4 years. But TMS is hopeful, lets hope it makes it on to NHS funding! (doubtful tho).


I think I might ask about derealisation.<br>Both of my parents are doctors so I'll start there. I've had anxiety pop in and out of my life for years (yesterday was a diSASTER) and sometimes have spaced out days, but ever since a tragedy a month and 11 days ago (my grandma died suddenly and we had to fly across the world again having just returned home from Africa the day before and it was the first day of the school term aghhhh) and the whirlwind that followed, I've been increasingly spaced out. I went through a period of utter grief where I cried every day, but now, with exams coming up and school taking away my time to grieve properly, something happened in my brain. I open my eyes and cannot believe what I see. I clap my hands together and I sense the touch but don't feel it in my bones or register that it happened. I see my face in the mirror and it's like a startle. It's so foreign - I used to be someone who made the most of everyday. Now I waste through them and could sit for hours staring into space. I have no track of time at all. The things you described in this video have peaked my interest and I think I might do some asking around and researching. Thanks so much :))

I think I might ask about derealisation.
Both of my parents are doctors so I'll start there. I've had anxiety pop in and out of my life for years (yesterday was a diSASTER) and sometimes have spaced out days, but ever since a tragedy a month and 11 days ago (my grandma died suddenly and we had to fly across the world again having just returned home from Africa the day before and it was the first day of the school term aghhhh) and the whirlwind that followed, I've been increasingly spaced out. I went through a period of utter grief where I cried every day, but now, with exams coming up and school taking away my time to grieve properly, something happened in my brain. I open my eyes and cannot believe what I see. I clap my hands together and I sense the touch but don't feel it in my bones or register that it happened. I see my face in the mirror and it's like a startle. It's so foreign - I used to be someone who made the most of everyday. Now I waste through them and could sit for hours staring into space. I have no track of time at all. The things you described in this video have peaked my interest and I think I might do some asking around and researching. Thanks so much :))


i''ve had depersonalisation since 2012 after being severely bullied online by supposed friends, making friends with one of them again and then that person dying (to put it blunt) without having a chance to have questions answered., i feel like im constantly looking through someone elses eyes a little bit like VR only a virtual reality of life. every thing i touch or feel feels secondry. i find i'm worse when in anxious situations. ive never wanted to be put on anything because if fear of getting worse and feeling less emotion than i have already. a Councillor gave me grounding techniques to do but i found that didnt work for me either. like you i reached a point were i started to tell myself, this is my life now but i also have moments where i want my life back but i dont know how. I also feel my own issues come from problems i faced in childhood too, being bullied by my teacher, due to learning difficulties, too.