I notice people with depersonalization/derealization have a thing. For dodie, it's looking in the mirror and not recognizing herself. For me, it's staring at my hand and realising this isn't my hand. So i wrote something that describes it.

You stare at the back of your hand. You see the cracks in your skin, the crevices, the spiderweb of ridges. They've allways been there. It is your hand, after all.
But this time it's different. The cracks are deep and dark enough to fall into. The crevices create baren river beds, branching across the rest of your hand. It seems dry and brittle. Like it could crumble at any moment.
You hunt down a bottle of lotion, but nothing changes.
Now it shimmers. The light catches it, and your hand seems a lot bigger than your hand should be.
Is this really your hand?
Someone has turned the sharpness up, a little too much. But there is no picture. There is no camera. There is simply a hand that you do not recognize, and something like panic making its slow way up your chest, using your ribs like the rungs of a ladder.
You stare at the hand until it is no longer a hand; it is something dark and terrifying. It is a physical representation of your own crumbling psyche. You shove it into your pocket, anywhere, just as long as it is out of sight.
One day you'll look at it again. And maybe that day you'll recognize your own hand.
It is your hand, after all.

I notice people with depersonalization/derealization have a _thing._ For dodie, it's looking in the mirror and not recognizing herself. For me, it's staring at my hand and realising _this isn't my hand._ So i wrote something that describes it.

You stare at the back of your hand. You see the cracks in your skin, the crevices, the spiderweb of ridges. They've allways been there. It is your hand, after all.
But this time it's different. The cracks are deep and dark enough to fall into. The crevices create baren river beds, branching across the rest of your hand. It seems dry and brittle. Like it could crumble at any moment.
You hunt down a bottle of lotion, but nothing changes.
Now it shimmers. The light catches it, and your hand seems a lot bigger than your hand should be.
_Is this really your hand?_
Someone has turned the sharpness up, a little too much. But there is no picture. There is no camera. There is simply a hand that you do not recognize, and something like panic making its slow way up your chest, using your ribs like the rungs of a ladder.
You stare at the hand until it is no longer a hand; it is something dark and terrifying. It is a physical representation of your own crumbling psyche. You shove it into your pocket, anywhere, just as long as it is out of sight.
One day you'll look at it again. And maybe that day you'll recognize your own hand.
It is your hand, after all.

i get the mirror thing so often i really fucking hope theres some fix

Oh my god that is exactly how I feel
And I feel the face
All of a sudden I’ll just be like “wait. These aren’t my hands. This isn’t my face. I’m not who I’m supposed to be. Who am I?”

this is really good writing. describes the disorder really well.

I have literally never related to a poem more in my entire life

i had a strange thing happen to me today where i was looking down at my hand and it looked alien like like i am in some random body it’s hard to explain but several time’s a day i swear i look different or my body changes through out the day ? i feel like i’m living in a movie and i’m the main character

i agree completely. spirituality and meditation have helped me so much.

I don't know if I have this but would suddenly stopping and thinking "Wait, I'm this one? That can't be right." (by this one I mean myself) be a "thing".

I have to like pointedly convince myself every single time that it's my hand, and that all of my body parts are mine it's so frustrating and makes me feel like I'm insane...

thehydrangea andtherose hey if you are interested in good literature in this topic, Sartre's "Nausea" describes exactly this sensation with the hand and all

This is really well written. I don't think I have depersonalization or derealization, but sometimes I feel this exact thing. It doesn't happen often, only sometimes when Im stressed or havent slept much, and this just describes that so much

My thing is that it's like controlling a body through a computer screen on a controller. When I'm not dissociating, I'm properly immersed, present, and can control myself fluidly and promptly; like a normal person. When I am dissociating, it's like the controls have become loose, the screen fuzzy, and sometimes even as if I'm tied to the opposite wall with bungee so that, in order to do something as simple as raising my arm, it takes a tremendous amount of effort.

I feel such a sense of familiarity with Dodie's story of forgetting and spacing out all of the time, for example:

Everything before a couple of months ago is fuzzy, like someone else recalled these things to me and I'm remembering there stories instead of my own, the other day my brother told me a story of how I once got a drink from somewhere at one of his football matches and that I was with I friend. He asked me where I had gotten the drink from and I had no idea what he was talking about. Apparently, I was with my friend, I have no idea who this person is.

I am also well known for leaving my phone as well as other objects I commonly use, I usually don't remember where I put these things, nor do I remember where I was in that moment that I had the lost thing.

So I've been dubbed irresponsible with my own things...

Whether, a mental disorder or not, I don't know, I just have this feeling that something is not quite right with me, like I'm missing something that people around me have.

But even still, I honestly doubt that these feelings are real.
Any Advice?

thehydrangea andtherose something like this happened to me once. It was the freakiest shit ever. I walked past the mirror and kinda got freaked out and then I started at MY face but saw it in a different way that I've ever done before. I started in the mirror for like 10 minutes just absolutely fascinated at it. Don't think it's anything serious cuz I had been awake for quite some time and my daily rhythm was screwed to shit

i haven’t been diagnosed with depersonalization/derealization but this does happen to me!! for me it’s my legs, i always would look at my legs as a kid and say “these are my legs! i don’t believe it but these are my legs” (my friends all thought it was weird and laughed at me). i can sit and stare at my legs for lengthy periods of time and just be so confused that they are mine and they are attached to my body. it’s weird.

thehydrangea andtherose this is beautiful

I'm really sorry to hear, that does sounds horrible :---( I don't know anything about this but condition but i was thinking maybe getting into Buddhism & spirituality could help, because i have the same feelings sometimes, but experience it as really positive.YES having a body is so weird and i love to think i'm not my body. I'll give a try to explain, i hope it makes sense hahah (this little text won't help you obviously, but if you interested, there are tons of books or even youtube video's!)

If you state that your body is yours, what about the air you breath? Is it not 'you' anymore as soon as you breathe it out? What about 'your' skin of your hand that changes constantly? Where can you draw the line really? Everything changes constantly and because of that we can say there are no permanent 'borders' between things. You can even go further and ask: Where would your mind be without a world around you? You wouldn't be able to think. In some way you are everything around you. You are the people you interact with, the people who make or sell you food, the people who give you love, you are nature, the stars, the sun etc. etc. etc. because without all of this you wouldn't be alive. All of it forms 'you'!

i have the exact same thing. i don't know or understand what it is. it drives me insane and sometimes it's not just my hand, sometimes it's the features of my face, or the hairs on my arm, or the cracks of my chapped lips. it makes me feel uncomfortable, ugly, something i don't want to feel. this happens a lot but most of the time i look normal, then at other times, i look like an alien

thehydrangea andtherose <br>i'd start staring at the floor trying to remember the situation i'm in. it sort of feels like i'm not in my body.

thehydrangea andtherose
i'd start staring at the floor trying to remember the situation i'm in. it sort of feels like i'm not in my body.

Your writing is absolutely gorgeous and so full of feeling. I’m sorry that you go through this though

That sounds exactly like what I sometimes experience, where suddenly I look at my hands and I feel like I'm playing a game and that's just my character's hand, and then I feel like my whole body is not mine... It's super weird, like looking through someone else's eyes kinda...

thehydrangea andtherose I’m not entirely sure I have derealisation or not but this does make sense to me. I often do this thing where I look at stuff I’ve written for uni or otherwise and it bothers me that I can’t remember writing it and I feel like past me doesn’t exist and it’s super weird and debilitating

thehydrangea andtherose that happened to me during class, and I had a panic attack. I was taking a math test at the time, being a straight A student. And I got a D. You explained it so well! I hope we can both figure this out!! Xoxo

I have these exact feelings, although they are only for small spans of time. I can not imagine how strong someone would have to be to get through this as a constant feeling. All this basically just to say, you are stronger than you know, and you can do this

thehydrangea andtherose that's honestly beautiful

when i actually have dp instead of dissociatiing i don't recognize myself in the mirror either, but its more of an "why does that person look so scared/angry/sad?" when i see a mirror, an my face never moves so i dont think about the mirror mirroring me, since it doesnt move

I do that thing too, but with my legs. It’s weird, like if I’m sitting and I look at my legs I’m like “woah those are attached to my body. like those are my legs”. I experience the mirror thing that dodie was explaining also though.

I have that thing with hand too and also I always feel like I'm just memory already in the past..

i actually have both, i mean it's not really that bad, it's just the moments of confusion, of "wait... this is me? i'm a person" it's really bizarre, stay strong though! did you go to any specialist btw?

thehydrangea andtherose it hurts to read how you go through that, I'm speechless.

thehydrangea andtherose I get the exact same thing, it always starts with the hand and the more I look at it the more foreign and scary it looks, then it generally progresses to the rest of my body which then just feels completely disconnected to my brain. Scary stuff


Seriously I’m so overwhelmed I felt so alone and it’s rlly hard to cope with this condition. Thank you for this topic


I don't know what this is, but it mixes with my anxiety, and I constantly feel as if in in a coma, and my whole life is a dream in that coma, and everything I say and do is being monitored and watched, and that I have no free will and my whole life is just a pre made out dream and I have never typed this or talked about it and I thought I was going crazy
I really wish I could know if this is normal, or if I'm fake
Oh shit now I'm beginning to believe my mind

Practicing deep breathwork as Wim Hof breathing. It s magical how it does reconnect you in minutes

Honestly, I’m going through the same thing and feel like I can’t convince myself that this is real life, even after waking up from a dream in the morning. Just know that we’re worrying that we are starting to believe it, like we are starting to go insane but we definitely are not.

Wow. This has always been the way I described it to people. I said that if someone whispered 'You're in a coma' into my ear, it wouldn't surprise me 😆

lmao thanks for ur concern I'm fucked up brain wise don't worry lol

Hey are you ok? It’s alright, i feel the same

@Skol Yeah please some update, you good ?


Yeah I've had this since i was a child. I don't remember a time where I wasn't floating. It gets worse when my anxiety disorder acts up so I currently can't focus my eyes correctly. It is incredibly frustrating.

Dude I’m telling you it triggers anxiety


Ever since I was 16 I've been feeling this on and off, sometimes super strong episodes. I am 23 now. Here are my triggers/symptoms...
Triggers: bright lights, hangovers(DP is so severe during these), lack of sleep.
Symptoms: weak, jelly- like legs, feeling like I'll pass out, the need for constant deep breaths, and in general, I just feel disconnected. It feels like my consciousness is 50% there when if should be 100%. Also important to note, I am an extremely happy person; I am in college full time planning to become a lawyer. I have a girlfriend, I love sports, etc. It is literally just this issue that is bothering me so much, nothing else! It seems like it never goes fully away.


i was diagnosed with this about two or three years ago because i had just lost my sister to suicide and i blamed myself for it and our situations are similar in the way we experience it. as for your suggestions for helping with it, i think i might try the tmsing as well as taking that vitamin as i haven't done those yet. also thank you for posting about this because i am glad that i am not alone!

-

TIPS:
- i like to remind myself that im present by always keeping a journal with me and reading all the notes my friends have written to me and most of the time it does the job.
- every so often i get up and do some streched.
- also, have someone hug you or touch you in an uplifting way!
- of course, always try to think positively!

+Rashida Roberta Bint Robert Pierce But I used to get feelings of being not quite in reality when a child and it teens and twenties ,Excuse my spelling mistakes and other mistakes please

+Rashida Roberta Bint Robert Pierce I meant to say suiside

+Rashida Roberta Bint Robert Pierce walking living nightmare just now sort of unreal ...but guess this is way it feels .its just not normal state to be in I'm grieving and heartbroken and removed from reality at same time

I just lost my son to subside a week an two days ago    I'm in kind or

When dodie talked about it... it's weird because I felt so many of these things before like sometimes my vision used to go black (and thinking back to it it was when I was really stressed out also) I remember one time I looked in the mirror and it didn't look like myself... like I knew I was looking at me but I didn't recognized myself like something was off and I can't explain why. And I 100% remember like last year and 2 years ago I felt like I wasn't thinking correctly like I didn't feel grounded at all. I forgot about everything and if became hard to think correctly? I really don't know how to explain not thinking correctly. It's like my brain wasn't organizing experiences and thoughts correctly. Idk I'm not saying I have this condition because it doesn't happen to be a lot but I remember experiencing some of these things before

I'm so sorry about your sister. Weirdly enough, I started dissociating after I also lost my sister to complications due to a suicide attempt (also two years ago) -- it can feel very isolating and scary. But you're right, you're not alone. <3

What helps me is focusing on sensation (Five things you can see, four things you can hear, three things you can smell, etc etc). I also listen to music to help ground me better by focusing on the lyrics, or a specific instrument in the song. Putting your hands under warm water or sticking an ice cube in your mouth may also help.

hoshijoo people using my name in conversations and touching my shoulder is so helpful! Also warm things like  hot showers and steamy soup. The same with really cold things like ice water. Doesn't fix it totally but it makes the world a little brighter! Thanks for the tips!


I had this condition last year, it felt overwhelming with fear like I feel like everything I see doesn't feel real or my surroundings feels unreal. That was really my horrible month of my life.


I never realized there were more people that experienced this it’s good to know I’m not the only one


i’ve watched this video so many times and always recommend it to people because of how you describe it. it brings a sense of comfort knowing it not a lone even if it feels like it


This happened to me once
And it was TERRIFYING

This happened to me once
And it was *TERRIFYING*

I had when i play with my 9 yo niece coz she moves her head like 👈👉👈👉👈👉 and i do the same maybe thats why it is happening lol

did it go away on its own or did you figure out a way to control it?

Coconut .*. Grease I have this feeling often where it’s like I’m watching a video of my life, like I’m disconnected from it and am like in the back of my head.


I appreciate your openness and honesty regarding this topic. Mental illnesses outside of depression and anxiety are rarely talked about in detail and there is still so much stigma around it. I really appreciate this video.

xoxXOXO l Also, depression and anxiety are unfortunetaly "so" represented that they end up being wildly misunderstood still, like people having an image of panic attacks in class from movies whereas for me it's much more like feeling like drowning and forgetting something hugely important at ALL times...

isn't derealization caused by anxiety and depression?<br>it is hard for many people to describe the symptoms they feel. and it is scary to tell others as fear that they might not be understood and they don't realize that many many many others feel the same

isn't derealization caused by anxiety and depression?
it is hard for many people to describe the symptoms they feel. and it is scary to tell others as fear that they might not be understood and they don't realize that many many many others feel the same

Then you clearly do not even know about depression and anxiety. It is very common to have derealization with those disorders. It's basically a symptom of those disorders.

MinistressForMagic same, I have depression and ADHD and YouTube and Reddit have been way more helpful than my doctors and therapist. We need more research on all of this.

MinistressForMagic same here. I’ve never heard of this condition before, so it’s great to learn about it from someone who can explain what it feels like to them.


I'd buy a video version of the book where you read the whole thing aloud. That was a fantastically emotive reading.


I remember when I was around  8 years old and I looked at my mom and said, "are you real? is this real?" and she got scared I was showing signs of early onset psychosis, but I was just going through derealization. It's so difficult to socialize during it because I feel like an alien masquerading as a human in an ill fitting skin suit. Everything feels like almost like a stimulation. It's not as jarring/scary as it was for me when I was a kid, but I think it's mostly because it's become my "normal".


thank you for saying this and speaking out. i feel seen and represented. this matter, you matter. sending you love.


I've had derealization happen to me 3 times in my life when my depression had peaked. it happened to me in the most inconvenient moments, during class. It's terrifying.


To everyone reading the comments. Feeling spacey (brain fog) is a VERY common thing and most people will experience it at some point in their life. It is when it occurs for an extended amount of time (EX: months, years) and interferes with your daily life and relationships  that it becomes a disorder. There is so much self-diagnosing these days that everyone seems to all have clinical depression, obsessive compulsive disorder, and an anxiety disorder. Please don't add this one to the list. It is hard enough for this one to be understood and taken seriously.<br>Just trust me when I tell you that every single person in the comments does not have DP/DR disorder...

To everyone reading the comments. Feeling spacey (brain fog) is a VERY common thing and most people will experience it at some point in their life. It is when it occurs for an extended amount of time (EX: months, years) and interferes with your daily life and relationships  that it becomes a disorder. There is so much self-diagnosing these days that everyone seems to all have clinical depression, obsessive compulsive disorder, and an anxiety disorder. Please don't add this one to the list. It is hard enough for this one to be understood and taken seriously.
Just trust me when I tell you that every single person in the comments does not have DP/DR disorder...

I don't self-diagnose myself, but I know I experience derealization pretty much my whole life.

I don't self-diagnose myself, but I know I experience derealization pretty much my whole life.

@rightattheend you do have depersonalization/derealization, i hope you do get better! ive been having this disorder for 3 years but still in this state

@summer yeah i feel weirdly disconnected from everything even myself like everyone else is there and im supposed to be there too but im just not ????

@rightattheend do you feel like youre in a dream or disconnected ?

@rightattheend do you feel like youre in a dream or disconnected ?

@Kimarie Sings ty! i havent been exposed to any substances that are in fact addictive

@Kimarie Sings ty! i havent been exposed to any substances that are in fact addictive

@summer If it started after taking a certain drug--stop using that drug or any other hallucinogenic drug. If it still persists I would suggest looking you some grounding meditation techniques and giving them a try. Best of luck to you.

i feel weirdly disconnected from both myself and my surroundings and it's been happening for a month but i don't feel anything like dodie described herself feeling ? idk what this is but like sometimes i realize im supposed to be here and it feels weird because i don't feel like im here ? is this depersonalization ? it doesn't affect me doing things, the only difference i've seen so far is that time is speeding by like so fast that it's not letting me do things ?

@M Mellette <br>I was wrong. I now finally understand the expression.

@M Mellette
I was wrong. I now finally understand the expression.

@Brinta that’s not how that works, but OK buddy. Pop off

@Brinta that’s not how that works, but OK buddy. Pop off

I totally get what you're saying, but you shouldn't shame everyone who's self diagnosed, derealization is not so common and some therapists can't diagnose it also not everyone has access to a therapist, so if the person takes the issue seriously and actually is feeling like this continuously(and has done proper research) then self diagnosis isn't a bad thing

@M Mellette
Every single person does not have -> everybody... not -> not anybody -> nobody (in the comments)

Is English not your first language?

@Brinta that means not everyone in the comments.

@Brinta that means not everyone in the comments.

@M Mellette
Emmy F said in the starting comment:
“Just trust me when I tell you that every single person in the comments does not have DP/DR disorder...”
That means ‘no one in the comments’. So what did I say wrong?

@Brinta they said not everybody in the comments. Not no one.

@Brinta they said not everybody in the comments. Not no one.

i have it but yeah, i agree. it's perfectly acceptable if you really can't get a diagnosis but are properly educated and aren't just claiming mental illnesses because you feel like it. but yeah, otherwise self diagnosing is so awful and really damaging and offensive.

@Emmy F that makes sense, thank you for elaborating and helping me have a better understanding of what you were trying to say

@Emmy F that makes sense, thank you for elaborating and helping me have a better understanding of what you were trying to say

@Pagan Athiest ~ hey! Thanks for the comment! I wanted to add to what you said. I feel like over-normalizing and making mental disorders trendy is what’s really hurting mental health in the social media world. I’m watching as mental disorders are being misunderstood and over self-diagnosed. Which makes each mental illness appear less serious and extremely common.

agreed, however this kind of mindset is exactly what brings the lack of concern for mental health.

agreed, however this kind of mindset is exactly what brings the lack of concern for mental health.

I have autism which i have been diagnosed with as well as anxiety and DR/DP which goes with my PTSD as well. Its odd how some mental disorders carry other ones and so forth.  However people self diagnosing i dont mind it as long as they plan on getting checked out asap to be sure and not go around saying that. But DP/DR is so little in my list of disorders i barley remember it because its just my life, sure it makes me super vulnerable and not able to enjoy family moments or remember things but its sometimes comforting.

thank u for this cause it makes it rlly hard for ppl who are diagnosed/figuring out their diagnosis to feel recognized and validated for their struggles.

Are you able to experience it for a few minutes? If so I might have had this happen to me. Thanks for the information btw.

Are you able to experience it for a few minutes? If so I might have had this happen to me. Thanks for the information btw.

What about if you have had it your whole life?

What about if you have had it your whole life?

Had this over a year an am struggling feel like if I die it’ll be back to normal it’s weird

Had this over a year an am struggling feel like if I die it’ll be back to normal it’s weird

Just because even you DO have a disorder, its not mandatory to be diagnosed. I get it, for some people it makes them relieved when there diagnosed, but make sure you want to be diagnosed for yourself, not other people.(basically not because you want attention)

For example, anxiety. Every. Single. Person will experiance some sort of anxiety attack in there life, it doesn't mean its a disorder

For example, anxiety. Every. Single. Person will experiance some sort of anxiety attack in there life, it doesn't mean its a disorder

Jamie Cragle ~ Hi!! Yes, videos about it are very helpful especially when you don’t know what going on. And some of the best help comes from those who have recovered from it. Many people do recover! DP/DR is often your brain trying to protect you from trauma/anxiety. But of course, it doesn’t feel like that and it’s very scary. The best thing you can do is distract yourself and know that there is hope and that you don’t need to worry. It’ll make it worse. Lol! Also, taking a B-complex vitamin  and D doesn’t hurt. lol!<br>I’m editing this to add that my original comment was meant for those who have felt the feeling before but only every once in a while. Bc that is a normal feeling. It’s when it’s all the time then it turns into a disorder. And people get confused then think they have it an panic and never get properly diagnosed. It’s kind of like how everyone seems to think they have clinical depression now. What happens when someone thinks they have something and actually don’t, they hurt the people who do have it because they don’t actually understand. And I know DP/DR disorder is rare. So when every comment is someone stating they have it. It gets concerning.

Jamie Cragle ~ Hi!! Yes, videos about it are very helpful especially when you don’t know what going on. And some of the best help comes from those who have recovered from it. Many people do recover! DP/DR is often your brain trying to protect you from trauma/anxiety. But of course, it doesn’t feel like that and it’s very scary. The best thing you can do is distract yourself and know that there is hope and that you don’t need to worry. It’ll make it worse. Lol! Also, taking a B-complex vitamin  and D doesn’t hurt. lol!
I’m editing this to add that my original comment was meant for those who have felt the feeling before but only every once in a while. Bc that is a normal feeling. It’s when it’s all the time then it turns into a disorder. And people get confused then think they have it an panic and never get properly diagnosed. It’s kind of like how everyone seems to think they have clinical depression now. What happens when someone thinks they have something and actually don’t, they hurt the people who do have it because they don’t actually understand. And I know DP/DR disorder is rare. So when every comment is someone stating they have it. It gets concerning.

Actually I have been searching for what this is since 2011. Once it happened to me it never stopped. I havent ever woke and was cleared headed since my first episode.  I thought it was medical like I was lacking a vitamins or maybe I cracked my nick or back and hurt my spine or had a stroke. Hearing you guys talk about has given me some hope. I even went to the Mayo clinic in Rochester. I have some other health issues but no one has ever told me about this one. I need to learn more.

also just because it interferes with daily life for over a month it doesn't mean its a dissociative disorder, it just means you have a symptom that over half of the disorders in the DSM share. also depending on location many people do have anxiety/depression. the rate is really high because our world is going to shit.

I personally don't think I have a dp/dr disorder but I definitely do experience it as a result of trauma. what's frustrating to me is that it's less likely that I have regular ptsd and that it's probably more likely c-ptsd but c-ptsd isn't even in the dsm-v so there's not a lot of ways it can be treated :/

Manuel Olivas has it got better overtime? I smoke k2 and got it too please reply !

Manuel Olivas has it got better overtime? I smoke k2 and got it too please reply !

Imagine you're someone who has experienced these symptoms, but you come across this comment and think "Yeah, that's right, I probably don't have this," and then going years undiagnosed, during which time it gets worse and worse. Everyone in the comments section doesn't have this condition, but unanimously deciding that everyone who questions whether or not they might have it  is deluding themselves is a bit of a stretch. P.S. depression and mental illness is more widespread than you think, and people aren't getting help because they keep convincing themselves that there's nothing wrong.

cagedheat3 is it constantly or just in episodes? Because mine is constant and has been every minute of the day for three days now!

cagedheat3 is it constantly or just in episodes? Because mine is constant and has been every minute of the day for three days now!

Emmy F
No one in the comments has this disorder? Are you sure?
People that have been diagnosed with something or are about to, tend to look up information on the internet. They’ll read and watch everything there is to find.

Honestly. A lot of people experience derealization and such without it being a disorder and just a brain’s reaction to high stress. But the difference is that it goes away. I know I’ve experienced it when my anxiety has gotten too high and I physically can’t handle it. But once I’m out of the situation, I’m good. But I know I don’t have DP/DR disorder.

Thank you. As someone who's been diagnosed by medical professionals with generalized anxiety disorder, depression, autism spectrum disorder (with the expected sensory processing disorder too), have had one doctor say he suspects PTSD (no diagnosis however so I don't just say I have it without first clarifying that it's only been suspected), as well as a few physical things like chronic acid reflux, it infuriates me when people are a little sad and call themselves depressed or get a bit nervous and say they have anxiety... Like damn people you're allowed to watch videos like this because it looks interesting (like me)

It seems like everyone has depression and anxiety these days because a lot of the population does. There has been numerous studies stating that this day and age majority of the population has mental disorders, and derelistaion is the third most common mental illness in the world so. Everyone is self diagnosing because sometimes doctors dont know what you're dealing with. You know your body better than anyone else

Hannie Mae i have mine got almost a year

Hannie Mae i have mine got almost a year

A lot of people commenting on these videos are very young as well

A lot of people commenting on these videos are very young as well

Windows XP autumn wallpaper is a superior choice

I don't think self-diagnosis is bad per se though, much like medical diagnosis is not guaranteed to be accurate, especially in psychiatry. That being said you need a lot of information to be able to attempt or question a diagnosis. And essentially what matters is the solution, not the label.

Hehe. Just by seeing the title I knew every comment would be "I have this")<br>I've seen it before. This girl explained it pretty well though, that the feeling might be familiar, but not to jump to conclusions..

Hehe. Just by seeing the title I knew every comment would be "I have this")
I've seen it before. This girl explained it pretty well though, that the feeling might be familiar, but not to jump to conclusions..

So what? People aren't allowed to question now?

So what? People aren't allowed to question now?

It's hard for a person to be told these things after you deny that nothing is wrong even tho you know something is right. I was told by people that I have anxiety.. but I still hate using the words even tho the doctors told me I have it.. it is annoying when people self diagnose.. cuz it's hard as a person with anxiety to even say that's what you have..

I am experiencing some symptoms, but I doubt I have it.

I am experiencing some symptoms, but I doubt I have it.

@Emmy F I don't think the YouTuber only mentioned brain fog... ō_o

@Emmy F I don't think the YouTuber only mentioned brain fog... ō_o

@Strawberry milk tae read my response above

@Strawberry milk tae read my response above

Eh<br>The reason why self diagnosis might seem common in this moment section is because it's likely that these people specifically wondered the same thing and looked it up, had it been a normal event, they could've brushed it off. Self diagnosis isn't as bad as people make it out to be. Because perhaps these people now feel understood and too are glad that it has a name.

Eh
The reason why self diagnosis might seem common in this moment section is because it's likely that these people specifically wondered the same thing and looked it up, had it been a normal event, they could've brushed it off. Self diagnosis isn't as bad as people make it out to be. Because perhaps these people now feel understood and too are glad that it has a name.

@The Blanket Fort Cohort I get how you feel.. Just wondering.. Are you in therapy for it? Cuz I actually am and it's working really well! It's called EMDR therapy. And I highly recommend it. Wish you luck! ❤

So true! Brain fog or spacing out isnt the same. Dpdr is much more intense like feeling extremely high. Visual distortions, a feeling of extreme isolation, feeling like you are forgetting everything you know... and its terrifying.   I have had it 3 months and its been the worst time of my life.

I was looking for the one comment that didn't self diagnose. It's very frustrating to see people,  who really don't know what this disorder, try and say they have it because they've felt one minor symptom. That's like every single comment.

@Emily Sikora Experiencing a symptom of something does not mean you have it. It's like if everyone who experienced a headache thought they had brain cancer.<br>Brain fog is one of the major symptoms of this disorder. Brain fog itself is so common that most of the population will experience it. Does that mean everyone has this chronic disorder? No. But people will still self diagnose. It seems to be the same for every other mental disorder too.

@Emily Sikora Experiencing a symptom of something does not mean you have it. It's like if everyone who experienced a headache thought they had brain cancer.
Brain fog is one of the major symptoms of this disorder. Brain fog itself is so common that most of the population will experience it. Does that mean everyone has this chronic disorder? No. But people will still self diagnose. It seems to be the same for every other mental disorder too.

Emmy F I mean or it could be more common than you realize? Jeez

Emmy F I mean or it could be more common than you realize? Jeez

If you're thinking about ashwaganda, make sure you don't mix it with the wrong meds

If you're thinking about ashwaganda, make sure you don't mix it with the wrong meds

I agree on this. I have it as a part of my PTSD so when someone's like "oh I get that." But they don't sleep till 3am and stare at screens all day...

tanye west i’m glad i found this comment bc i have like 10-20 minute episodes of brain fog like every couple days or so and i felt like it wasn’t this chronic disorder but i can relate to how it’s described bc i have these episodes every so often. i was trying to see if people have what i have and i know this isn’t quite the same. thank u for confirming that this disorder is chronic

Ashwaghanda cured mine!!! I ran out two weeks ago tho so it’s back lol but

Ashwaghanda cured mine!!! I ran out two weeks ago tho so it’s back lol but


legit me, but i makes me panic a lot cos like i feel like my family n friends are just something my brain has created and no one is real and i’m just here.

@Mike Welch how long did you have dpdr ?

Practicing deep breathwork as Wim Hof breathing. It s magical how it does reconnect you in minutes

I've had mine for a week now and it was triggered from a video I watched on YouTube about solipsism. What a bad idea that was

You just described me exactly. Oh my god

same! the solipsism has been strong recently

deathfu same!!! I feel like nothing is real and just a figment of my imagination


I have a history of derealizing during times of heightened anxiety. It's so, so, so so so scary. I can't imagine feeling like that all the time. It's worse than the anxiety itself, i feel like I'm the only person in the whole world that's real, everything and everyone else is fuzzy and two dimensional. I'm so fortunate that this isn't a constant thing for me.


oh my god this is exactly what i’ve been going through i can’t believe other people are going through this too


I burst into tears watching this I had no idea other people felt like this. Thank you for making this video it is incredibly validating to know I’m not alone

Nicole Winters I cried too. I've felt like this almost my whole life and thought I was alone

I started crying as well. I’ve been sick for the past 5 years (it all started after a bad car wreck and PTSD) but the foggy/spacey/dreamy feeling has been more present this past year. I’ve been to so many doctors, had counseling (for awhile), gone to my psychiatrist, had eyes checked, gone to neurologist and had testing done, trying to sort things out yet somehow, other things kept popping up. I never thought that the dreamy feeling I was experiencing was valid, or that I was actually feeling it. ‘Maybe it was just a bad day, a bad week, a bad month,’ I kept telling myself. But it wasn’t. What I’m feeling is valid and real, even if everything else feels unreal. And watching this incredible video proved that. I found such an immense sense of comfort and of calmness after watching this video. I told my mom and we’re going to schedule an appointment with my counselor, to sort everything out, and then hopefully begin finding the best kind of treatment for me. <br> None of us are alone in this fight that we call life (I’m felling very poetic at the moment lol muh bad) and we can all find comfort with the incredible (and definitely real) people around us. Hope that you’re doing better, after finally knowing that you are definitely NOT alone💗💗

I started crying as well. I’ve been sick for the past 5 years (it all started after a bad car wreck and PTSD) but the foggy/spacey/dreamy feeling has been more present this past year. I’ve been to so many doctors, had counseling (for awhile), gone to my psychiatrist, had eyes checked, gone to neurologist and had testing done, trying to sort things out yet somehow, other things kept popping up. I never thought that the dreamy feeling I was experiencing was valid, or that I was actually feeling it. ‘Maybe it was just a bad day, a bad week, a bad month,’ I kept telling myself. But it wasn’t. What I’m feeling is valid and real, even if everything else feels unreal. And watching this incredible video proved that. I found such an immense sense of comfort and of calmness after watching this video. I told my mom and we’re going to schedule an appointment with my counselor, to sort everything out, and then hopefully begin finding the best kind of treatment for me.
 None of us are alone in this fight that we call life (I’m felling very poetic at the moment lol muh bad) and we can all find comfort with the incredible (and definitely real) people around us. Hope that you’re doing better, after finally knowing that you are definitely NOT alone💗💗


Thank you for talking about it ❤i thought I'm the only one feeling this , it is kinda terrible but yeah we keep moving on 🤧


This is very interesting actually. I read Dodie's book and I found the whole thing amazing. But I did find the concept of this interesting but difficult to comprehend. This sounds like a really difficult struggle. I really send hope to anyone going through this.


I watched this before i realized i had this and derealization is terrifying, but its comforting to know you're not completely alone on that

Its now come to a point where i can sense when im going to derealize and thankfully pretending to pull myself back into my body has been helping


Oh wow, thank you so much for sharing this, it must have taken so much courage. Huge props to you and massive respect.


Does anyone ever have to be constantly telling them selves it's not a dream and it's reality?

@HungryBurger619  yes I did, it eventually began fading away the more I accepted it. After handling my anxiety attacks and not fighting it, my mind later adjusted to reality :)

When I was a kid I used to cry over the Idea that my parents were a dream

More often than not lately it seems at times. Like, I feel like I'm losing myself. But I do have support so I try to stay as positive as possible

i don’t but it’s weird bcs i do get the bright/fuzzy thing she was talking about...like when you’re outside and it’s really bright then you come inside and for like a second or two you can’t really see...for me it’s like purple and black fuzz in front of my vision. it’s really weird and not sure if I should be worried about it. never really was concerned about it so idk if it is normal or not. also you guys should read the Bible just saying if u aren’t Christians bcs it will help you. we will all get new bodies when He returns!

yeah, I've had it for a few years and some months ago I had to go to the doctors bc I was afraid I was gonna hurt myself... + i sometimes can forget days, like I can get up on Wednesday and I just can't remember Monday and Tuesday. like they are completely gone. It's enjoying, and it effekts school a lot.

Yeah I had that on the first day of school....

to-fall-upwards so did you end up going gluten free or just taking enzymes? Sorry just trying to understand

If by dream you mean nightmare then fuck yeah!

i know u posted this comment a while ago but for me when i’m felling ‘fuzzy’ i always have to remind myself where i am and that this is real. i know it is real but it never feels it

I feel like I'm in a dream I'm starting to lose my mind

I just accept it as a dream, which allows my mind to calm down and come back to reality

Yes! Constantly I have to remind myself that the things around me are not actually distorted and that I'm not actually in a nightmare. It's exhausting and draining.

Yes and when I do that I feel more anxiety

Lyle same age I got that illness, you’re going to be in for a bumpy ride in life I’m 19 now. I play video games to forget it

All the time. Nothing ever really makes sense and I start to think of everything strangely. I know how you feel and you are not alone ❤

don't worry we're all real, other people notice you so we are all real, we just have either some problems we can extinguish forever. I wish mental illnesses did not exist. :/. Maybe we have went through a bad experience l ike the person above said, and our brain wants to protect us by thinking it's not real. So in order to get out of it I'm guessing we have to either change our lifestyle a little or meditate or find a therapist. I'm no specialist, i'm just a 15 year old with the same problem. Just my recommendation, i'm going to try it sometime. Anyone know any good hobbies I can start doing? (I'm a boy by the way)

Sometimes I have lucid dreams and I wake up and I’m like I’m awake right. Gets me every time 🙄

I never knew it had it name. I just thought ok I'm just having an episode.  I'd always called it a disassociative episode.

Your okay!  U are in reality just keep telling yourself self that your mind doesn't take over your life!!

Francisco Vergara yessssss it’s so scary cause I afraid I’m actually asleep and I my life is just a dream


Wow. Now I remember what my therapist said I had. Thank you. This whole time I kept thinking the word she used was dementia. Since becoming an adult I’ve learned what that word meant and realized I was clearly remembering very wrong. I was diagnosed as a young teen in middle school and Never really understood why my therapist diagnosed me with this until now. Thank you! 🤗


When i was about 10 I started to have these weird sensations that made me feel like if everything isn't reality. Id look at people around me and they'd seem so normal while im over here feeling anxious that im in a body thats going through experiences.<br>At 21 (!!!) An epiphany came to me that I feel that way because I AM alive and moving through time in my own body. I am a soul. And literally never had those odd anxiety episodes anymore

When i was about 10 I started to have these weird sensations that made me feel like if everything isn't reality. Id look at people around me and they'd seem so normal while im over here feeling anxious that im in a body thats going through experiences.
At 21 (!!!) An epiphany came to me that I feel that way because I AM alive and moving through time in my own body. I am a soul. And literally never had those odd anxiety episodes anymore


Practicing deep breathwork as Wim Hof breathing. It s magical how it does reconnect you in minutes


This is literally my first time hearing about this, but I absolutely feel this way all the time, for years... I don't know how to see a psychiatrist though.


You probably won’t see this but I just wanted to say that in music class, we have to write about our favorite artist and I chose you. You have been such an inspiration that even when you are in your lowest low you can make it out. Thank you

Same with me!! I had to do a 5 page project on dodie with a discography, biography, introduction  and a bunch of other stuff.

Just to make you feel better lots of YouTubers have secret accounts just to read the comments so you have hope of her seeing this

Luise H this is so cute, I hope Dodie sees it


im experiencing derealization since 2 years now. And this is exactly that, high lights are very triggering for me, I feel like I’m ALWAYS TIRED, I forget everything, looking straight at people make their faces looks very weird. Its like i was seeing a movie in front of my eyes. And the voice I heard coming naturally from my body isnt really the person thinking. (This is really not like skizophrenia, i don’t hear voices at all^^, its just like when we are dreaming yeah) I feel like I’m high ALL THE TIME. Feel like I just hit a huge blunt and I’m not getting back from my trip lol. It’s very VERY hard for me. I can’t take things as they are, i have a cool life but this thing is destroying everything. Its funny because I use the word floating too! It describe it so much
I got an appointment to see a psychiatrist in December,but I’m afraid it will stay all my life....
I saw that comment of someone saying if it have an impact on our lives than it become a disorder. I can’t do things properly, every time I hang out with friends to parties or something I feel really uncomfortable. Because of all the lights, all the people... Nobody see it because I look ok, but in my head it’s so foggy and unclear
Im always tired, I can’t remember  anything...
I had a very important family meeting and derea HIT SO HARD. I was nearly going to faint. SO please if you are experiencing that, go see someone. A professional, or talk to your parents if you are young
I never did those in 2 years and today this is a problem for my everyday life.
(Sorry if any mistakes, im not from an English speaking country)
Anybody experiencing that too?

It’s gotten worse for me the past years, it came to a point where i also think about killing myself everyday. I’ve lost contact with every friend i ever knew and don’t have any motivation to do anything. It’s hard for me to socialize and blend in with every other person. I feel extreme tiredness after trying to socialize at all. I have an appointment at the hospital soon for this tiredness because i’ve had it for years but i feel like it has more to do with mentality than physically because i’ve done so many blood tests and i take alot of vitamins and iron medication but it just doesn’t work, i feel so dizzy and weak all the time and it just keeps getting worse. I’m so glad i watched this video or else I wouldn’t have known. Everything matches SO perfectly i’m sure that i have it. I don’t even feel things anymore. I hate changes because my brain hardly progresses new things. I used to go to 2 different psychologists but i gave up because i just had a hard time talking, telling my experiences and remembering things. Do u recommend me to go to a psychologist again? And how did they help u? I’m literally just 17 years old and my teen years have gone to waste because of this, i hope to get a reply from u

@francesca francesca Hello!
Thank you for your answer.
We are 1 year ago from that comment, I saw a psychologist, I’m feeling much better. I’m no longer experiencing déréalisation anymore !
So to everyone who is experiencing that right now, please don’t loose hope.

Hi! I surely hope you're better. Please remember that it is a process, but that you are definitely not alone!!! You deserve health and happiness, and you will get there. Just be sure to listen to yourself and don't give up!


I went through the same thing a few years ago and it was the scariest time of my life. Funny enough, I didn't even know what it was until I googled "if feels like I'm dreaming all the time." It felt like I was looking through foggy glass and nothing felt vivid, I felt like I couldn't appreciate my surroundings and it caused severe panic attacks. I remember thinking "how am I going to function like a normal adult with this?"

 The worst part was that no one understood, so thank you for making this video and bringing awareness to derealization.

My derealization did eventually get better, and it isn't constant anymore. However I do fall back into episodes every once and awhile... But being able to put a name to it, and understand that I'm not in any danger from it, really really helps with coping.

Hey are you better now? I’ve been derealzing and it’s causing me to stop eating and become sick from the anxiety.I was perfectly okay before, it was really sudden and I think my existential thoughts had caused it.Help?


I've literally never been able to describe these feelings out loud and while not going to self diagnose myself, these all sound like familiar aspects of my daily life.


I understand exactly how you feel. I stayed up 2 nights in a row for an exam once and my friends treated me to some alcohol and I wound up in that state. I was absolutely terrified because I thought it was chronic but it went away after I sobered up.


To all the people self-diagnosing in the comments:

Personally, it’s not too annoying for me when people hear about my dpdr and say “oh I get this and that too”, because I’ve learned over the past year that nobody is 100% okay in the head, because nothing defines ‘100% okay’. We’ve all got little tics and things that just aren’t right.
I’m not okay, though, with the glorification of these symptoms and them being used as a personality trait to try and make oneself more of a three-dimensional character, which seems to happen all too often recently.

My advice for people who want to find out what’s up with them (if there is anything actually wrong) is to write down a list of symptoms you’ve been experiencing and bring them to a professional, not WebMD and not a toxic forum, because young people are now collecting mental illnesses from the DSMV like shiny Pokémon cards and that’s not good for the statistics, and it’s certainly not good for the people actually suffering from these illnesses thinking that maybe it’s normal/developmental when it’s not.

*To all the people self-diagnosing in the comments:*

Personally, it’s not too annoying for me when people hear about my dpdr and say “oh I get this and that too”, because I’ve learned over the past year that nobody is 100% okay in the head, because nothing defines ‘100% okay’. We’ve all got little tics and things that just aren’t right.
I’m not okay, though, with the glorification of these symptoms and them being used as a personality trait to try and make oneself more of a three-dimensional character, which seems to happen all too often recently.

My advice for people who want to find out what’s up with them (if there is anything actually wrong) is to write down a list of symptoms you’ve been experiencing and bring them to a professional, not WebMD and not a toxic forum, because young people are now collecting mental illnesses from the DSMV like shiny Pokémon cards and that’s not good for the statistics, and it’s certainly not good for the people actually suffering from these illnesses thinking that maybe it’s normal/developmental when it’s not.

self diagnosing is more of a comfort thing honestly. its easier to cope with what your feeling if you can name it and learn about the symptoms. its about being able to relate. some people cant afford therapy either.

dontlookatluke I've been doing a lot of research and gone on reliable sources. I match all of the symptoms, so I think it's fine to self diagnose. It's the only way I can describe how I'm feeling. I'm going to a therapist soon, but finding a name for it beforehand is not a bad thing

Victoria Kitten ye, looking at your symptoms is okay, but it isnt alright to tell everybody you have, for example, ptsd. yes, you might have the symptoms but that doesn't mean that you have the syndrome or whatever. talk to a proffesional and take your time on trying to understand it, not telling everybody about it just to get sympathic looks. im sorry if this is offensive to anyone, but you shouln't feel targeted if you haven't done anything like this.

a problem is not everyone can get professional help & depending on race & gender it's harder to get diagnosed properly

Your last two sentences contradict each other.

dontlookatluke or...maybe they actually have it or think they might but have not yet been diagnosed..? Lol come on man fr

dontlookatluke Thank you for this comment!
This particular video is giving me a thought that maybe I should talk to my doctor, because this sounds familiar to how messed up I’ve felt over the past since forever ago. (I’m not to say those with mental illness are messed up, I just feel like my brain is broken sometimes)
I do also hate how people romanticize because no mental illness is fun to deal with...

dontlookatluke what happened to your older videos? they definately have changed which I did not see coming lol I can see why now that I'm finding you here. which is sort of funny/cool.

queen jeski Somehow this comment made me so angry I started laughing.

How are we to know how much is normal if it's all we've ever known? I didn't know I had bpd because everybody around me downplayed my symptoms. Nobody ever got me tested for autism, or ADD, or depression, or stress, or anxiety..

Everyone gets so angry about so called self-diagnosis.
If I had never found information online, I wouldn't have brought up my symptoms to my doctor because MY SYMPTOMS ARE NORMAL TO ME.

So when you sit there and say "just because this, doesn't mean that", you aren't helping. It just makes the people who might actually need that diagnosis doubtful of themselves and how they feel. Comments like yours are what suppressed me and made me suppress myself for years.

dontlookatluke. Is it bad that I said I experience episodes such as these which are part of my DIAGNOSED PTSD, Depression, and Anxiety.

Alex Volkov <br>I’m sorry you had to go through that. Although suicidal ideation isn’t a direct symptom, it can stem from the depression usually caused by dp/dr. God knows how many times I’ve accidentally tried to self harm while thinking I was dreaming to ‘wake up’. Hope you’re on the road to recovery and good luck!

Alex Volkov
I’m sorry you had to go through that. Although suicidal ideation isn’t a direct symptom, it can stem from the depression usually caused by dp/dr. God knows how many times I’ve accidentally tried to self harm while thinking I was dreaming to ‘wake up’. Hope you’re on the road to recovery and good luck!

Yeah, scrolling down and hearing some people say "omg I feel like this too, I didn't know I had this mental illness" just makes me sad. A lot of feelings associated with mental illness can occur naturally in everybody, and usually do at some point. But an actual mental illness is completely different. For me (trigger warning here) I felt like my life was ruined when I developed this disorder - for 2 years I woke up everyday wondering if today is the day I kill myself. I had to drop out of school for a year because my paranoia was too bad for me to even go out in public during the day. I felt no happiness, no relief, nothing good at all and lost all emotional memories, it was a life of constant fear, like hell on earth itself - the people who suffer from this disorder, know something is wrong with them. It's not something you just read about and go "omg I had no idea, guess I'm mentally ill". No, you'll know  it if you actually get it.

I hate when people glorify mental illness. it's way deeper than being edgy and just sad or scared

and also most everyone experiences dp/dr at some point in their life and that is very normal it does not mean that you have the disorder. it is only a problem when it takes over your life and disrupts you from doing your daily activities

Hauyne
yeah people do, i think its mostly in online communities where a lot of people who actually have the disorders tend to congregate and your average joe steps in, exaggerates their own experience to -- quite ironically -- fit into the group of oddballs. this could also be due to toxic spaces like some dark corners of tumblr poking fun at "neurotypical people" because they ~apparently~ are very insensitive in everything that they do and everything is ableist.
i personally see no real point in self dx-ing, because in saying that you have something that has not been analyzed by a professional you could also be doing something counterproductive because the mind is quite complex, but then again it can be a great sense of comfort for fellows in dark places. i relate with you on that, although i don't claim to have the disorder because it does not really benefit me, i do associate with terms that are used to describe it because what i go through fills that mold pretty well.

Woooooow this is everything I wanted to say. THANK YOU for being so honest!

I've actually self-disgnosed drd because all the symptoms i have match all the symptoms of the disorder, but I take it? seriously? (i have been meaning to speak with a professional, dw)<br>do people really diagnose themselves with disorders because they think its unique or something?? thats,,, p fucked up???

I've actually self-disgnosed drd because all the symptoms i have match all the symptoms of the disorder, but I take it? seriously? (i have been meaning to speak with a professional, dw)
do people really diagnose themselves with disorders because they think its unique or something?? thats,,, p fucked up???

couldnt say it better myself! thank you!

dontlookatluke exactly my point! everyone has ’something’. i do not mean to trivialize anyone’s experiences, but just because you sometimes have a hard time concentrating doesn’t mean you have adhd, you sometimes being sad and hating life doesn’t neccessarily mean you’re depressed, having emotions all over the place doesn’t equal borderline. the tip about writing down your symptoms and then going to a professional is great!


i come back to this video often to just cry and feel less alone in my feelings of dissociation. thank you for making this, i really appreciate it

Dilpreet I’m also Punjabi and it is very painful to live like this.


I find this very interesting. Growing up I didn’t really feel this way, I was very attached to the world. Only a couple of times did I ever have similar experiences growing up. When I would contemplate birth and death I would get the feeling of peace in a way, not of ending sorrow but of knowing that what I was was beyond this temporary life and that I would still exist beyond death. This happened only around 10 or so times going in to my high school years. Also, another instance was a memory, and it is as real as any memory I’ll ever have. A memory of me flying, over my hometown, I think, the buildings were a bit blurry. I could only see and I had no thoughts. It seemed I was flying very slow, kind of like in slow motion. <br>These were my only instances of anything similar that you have talked about in this video which occurred while I was growing up. Now, after studying and meditating upon different processes, concepts, and knowledge, I know that what you are speaking of is the only reality. You are not the mind, nor the body, nor the intellect. You are the unchanging consciousness in which you observe everything. You observe the waking state, the dream state, and deep sleep. Everything arises and falls in you, the world is in you, you are the world, and you are one with everything. The real illusion is what you call reality. Even in dreaming, it is but an illusion. Who you are is real. And so, everything which enters and goes from your consciousness is just like everything that enters and goes in your dream. It is you. This is called advaita Vedanta. Non-dual spirituality. And gaining this knowledge I used the instances growing up to help me know the non-dual nature of existence. You will always exist. You are existence itself, pure consciousness. What I find interesting is that you are immersed in the true reality without knowledge, and so think of it as illusion. I am immersed with knowledge, and observe it as alone real.  I highly recommend learning the teachings of advaita Vedanta as I think this can help you immensely. It will help you deal with the illusoriness of the world. Swami vivekenanda, swami sarvapriyananda, and Arsha Bodha are all great places to learn on YouTube. I wish you luck.

I find this very interesting. Growing up I didn’t really feel this way, I was very attached to the world. Only a couple of times did I ever have similar experiences growing up. When I would contemplate birth and death I would get the feeling of peace in a way, not of ending sorrow but of knowing that what I was was beyond this temporary life and that I would still exist beyond death. This happened only around 10 or so times going in to my high school years. Also, another instance was a memory, and it is as real as any memory I’ll ever have. A memory of me flying, over my hometown, I think, the buildings were a bit blurry. I could only see and I had no thoughts. It seemed I was flying very slow, kind of like in slow motion.
These were my only instances of anything similar that you have talked about in this video which occurred while I was growing up. Now, after studying and meditating upon different processes, concepts, and knowledge, I know that what you are speaking of is the only reality. You are not the mind, nor the body, nor the intellect. You are the unchanging consciousness in which you observe everything. You observe the waking state, the dream state, and deep sleep. Everything arises and falls in you, the world is in you, you are the world, and you are one with everything. The real illusion is what you call reality. Even in dreaming, it is but an illusion. Who you are is real. And so, everything which enters and goes from your consciousness is just like everything that enters and goes in your dream. It is you. This is called advaita Vedanta. Non-dual spirituality. And gaining this knowledge I used the instances growing up to help me know the non-dual nature of existence. You will always exist. You are existence itself, pure consciousness. What I find interesting is that you are immersed in the true reality without knowledge, and so think of it as illusion. I am immersed with knowledge, and observe it as alone real.  I highly recommend learning the teachings of advaita Vedanta as I think this can help you immensely. It will help you deal with the illusoriness of the world. Swami vivekenanda, swami sarvapriyananda, and Arsha Bodha are all great places to learn on YouTube. I wish you luck.


I went through this when I was 18 for a brief period of time when things in my family started going south. My doctor said my brain was trying to protect me but it happened so fast and was so scary, I remember sitting my mom down and telling her I wouldn't be able to live life in this state and I would kill myself if I didn't get better.
My mom is an alcoholic and my parents were at the beginning of their divorce when this happened so things were often ugly at home. I worked at a drugstore and my older coworkers were sharing some of their drunk stories when it  hit me. All of a sudden my hands looked fake, my voice sounded like I was listening to it through an answering machine, I couldn't put names to faces.... It was terrifying. I felt like I was in a dream and couldn't tell  if I was awake or would wake up soon. I eventually got on anxiety medication and luckily for me I was grounded in reality again.  I remember feeling hopeless, scared, suicidal, confused. I remember saying "I wouldnt wish this on my worst enemy".

I'm 25 and while I have other mental health conditions, I was lifted from the haze. I feel real. I'm not sure what pulled me out, but I know it's possible. If you are reading this and need someone to talk to I am here for you.

Hi I'm a mother of three and pregnant I'm scared I won't come out of this what can I do?

So ive been thinking that life is a dream for almost a year or so..And i just can't get over it..
I told my mom my dad but they can't do anything about it they sometimes just stare at me like I'm crazy...So pls help me get over this its a horrible feeling...My friend had this too she tried to help but it didn't work...
Sometimes i just wanna kill myself bc of it...
Please help me :(
And actually sometimes i would cry hard bc of this whole fucking thing!
....If anyone knows how to cure this pls say so it would mean so much to me♥..
Thank you :)..♥

I’m pretty much going through the same thing right now

stephanie weller stephani what medication did you take to help you?


I was getting a feeling of altered reality, (very dreamlike when I was getting vertigo frequently). I also disassociate because of PTSD. Glad you got a diagnosis hun.


The fact that nearly everyone in the comments seems to have this condition is quite concerning.

People would be googling to see what they might have. Her viewers for this specific video would be different than a regular video. People who don't relate wouldn't comment. People who do would and would enjoy finding people like them and therefore reach out more.

They majority only think they do because they are trying to be sympathetic and want to comment.

now i’m scared because i think i have it i’ve had these symptoms for a couple years now and i never knew what it was i always thought it was just anxiety but the description fits perfectly to me now idk if i’m just lying to myself 😭

charlie no you're confused. This condition is completely different from just daydreaming. Please do your research before making insensitive remarks.

Pepromene they don’t necessarily have the condition but that may have experience it in times of stress and anxiety and depression.

LaVonne West a lot of people want to relate or have some kind of illness. Yes it sounds wrong, and it kinda is, but there sure are some people that for example don’t have a nice life. Getting compliments and motivation from people is wanted and attention is appreciated. I’m not calling out anybody, but i’m just saying that even i was once like that.

I don’t expect people who don’t feel this way would take the time to leave a comment about how they don’t relate, you know what I mean? It might just be that

there's almost 500k views and about 5k comments. i would assume people who have experienced this such as myself and know what it is would be attracted to this video and leave a comment to connect with other people who have too. it's a strange feeling many don't talk about or understand, it's nice to have your experiences validated. (:

well this video probably attracted a bunch of people who experience/d the same or similar situations

Agreed, especially as derealisation/depersonalisation is often a symptom alongside anxiety disorders. It's rarer to have it persist for years, but the 'surreal' feeling itself is not at all unusual in small phases for most people who are already suffering with another mental health problem.

Yh I don’t have it I’m just constantly tired cos I don’t look after my self 😂

Halcyonacoustic not really, you’d think a large percentage of her fans would just want to watch the video no matter the title. Plus, it had only been up for a short while when I commented so it would surprise me if all these comments have come from people who aren’t subscribed to dodie and are here purely for this subject.

Well, she did say it's a common symptom of things like depression (which is rather common), and since this video has almost 400.000 views, 40.000 likes and 4000 comments so far, that gives you somewhere around 1-10% of viewers having that symptom (if you assume every commenter does). Doesn't sound too unlikely to me, especially considering she does talk about mental health in many of her videos and is likely attracting an audience that appreciates that .

Barnum effect. Seeing things and making yourself believe they apply to you. Kinda like reading horoscopes. Or being a hypochondriac

Pepromene I think they're confusing it with just being human... I day dream a lot and prefer to be in my head than in reality but doesn't everyone? It doesn't mean you're special or have a mental illness. Anyone who thinks they have this should go and see a mental health doctor so they can confirm it and receive any help they need instead of writing a few paragraphs in the YouTube comments. By no means am I stating that there's nothing 'wrong' with them but there's a fine line between the average human mind and mental illness.


I experienced this often during the time that my son was having a severe regression in development and my grandmother was dying.  I have also had this occasionally during times of conflict like in school when being bullied etc.  It is precipitated by extreme stress.  I feel physical activity helps some.  For what ever reason I have not experienced it recently.


I never knew this existed but I'm so proud of you and you're amazing 🤗


I was left alone a lot as a child and i distinctly remember that feeling of floating out of yourself. I would swing between being convinced that i wasn't real and being convinced that i was actually insane. Being around others is important!


I have the same issues... I see so many people do also now and it makes me feel relief. I’ve been on anti depressants and anxiety medications, tranquilizers and therapy. It is that feeling of everything moving faster in pace and you are trying to focus, but that feeling of disconnect. Thank you for this video. I see it was posted a couple years ago, but you have made me feel more self aware and that I am not crazy. When I see my therapist, I now know what I can reference.


Thank you for describing derealisation in such a mature way, that really helped me, as someone who does not experience derealisation (but does suffer from depression and social anxiety), understand what it is like to experience derealisation. Thank you dodie.

I also suffer from depression and social anxiety but I have slight feelings of derealisation and Dodie described it so well xx


I've tried explaining to my friends that when I am in a bad spot, I can't tell the difference between dreams and reality. Theres a whole year I barely remember except for small parts. No one understands it when I talk about it but this makes it make more sense to me. Maybe this is what's going on :)

I feel like Ive lost my whole perception of time like I don’t remember when things took place anymore and the days just get jumbled together and fly by. Like I was never even a part of them and these aren’t even my memories


It must be really weird and tiring to have derealization all the time! I only feel this on anxiety attacks including sometimes depersonalization but all the time! you're so brave 💝 thank you for sharing it


i feel like i’m dreaming and it’s giving me an anxiety attack.

Practicing deep breathwork as Wim Hof breathing. It s magical how it does reconnect you in minutes

@cosmic jessica If it gives someone anxiety attack it's not that cool is it?

@cordelia why not? life is so boring, and i wanna know what one feels like


im so glad you have this which reads to me that it is not a condition, but a blessing. I can understand how this world has  a hard time to understand it that they just call it "condition".


Wow,
Hi I’m fourteen, and yesterday I went to a therapist for the first time because of derealization. Being in school, you need to constantly stay focused and on task. Yet class would go by in a blur, it was like there were white clouds over my vision and sound was muffled. And after class, my friends would ask what was wrong, I would be sitting in my seat with a distorted face not looking at anything just staring forward. I looked confused by they would say, whilst in reality I was trying to wipe away the clouds blocking away my vision. I felt as though I was going insane. Already depressed I felt defeated, left alone in the world. I have started to self harm, as I fell only deeper into depression because of the stress mental illness brings upon us. Yet as I went to a therapist yesterday and I found out I’m not alone. It was so funny to see this video pop up on my feed after all this happened. I haven’t tried any treatment yet, but I hope so soon. I’m seen as an annoyance to teachers as when they ask me to read or answer a question I take at least 30 seconds to snap out of my state. And though it seems like not much time, 30 seconds is enough to get you some bullying. I’m seen as a freak and a weirdo, and I’m scared to talk about it. Yet watching this video, I felt as though I was talking to a friend! You are such an inspiring beautiful person, and I hope you realize that! Xoxo Mollie from Seattle
P.S
If anyone else does read this, if you are feeling this way reach out to a trusted teacher! My old teacher from 7th grade (Ms. Weed) yes weed.. She is absolutely amazing and sweet. I told her about how I felt, and it really kickstarted my journey to getting better!

mythical. Hey! So happy so many people going through the same thing are commenting over here! I’m sorry about your situation about therapy, my first initial response is it’s not always going to click at first. Look around not everyone finds a good counselor on the first try! Or, what I did, was find a therapist who specializes in your age group. They understand so much better and get how your feeling. I know it’s hard, trust me! But force yourself to not give up and keep looking, because once you find a good one you will feel so much better! I promise! At least now you know you aren’t alone, and you aren’t going insane! Lots of love!! Xoxo

ps2 I don't have any trusted teachers bc It's my first year at this school but I will consider going to my old one :/

Mollie O. SAME I'm 16
the worst thing is when a teacher says something about that people can't interact with each other and I'm like "me right now" or that we're such a good class(group, then i think "not me")
On Tuesday teacher said "if someone answers that question gets a five(mark)"
after about 20 sec I answered correctly gave me a high five(and I thought the whole time, till the end of the lesson " I will finally get a good mark at geography" and then i went to his table and asked "so i will get this five?" and he answered "i already gave you" after 5 seconds i finally understood. People from school think I'm stupid and lazy not that It's a health condition. I've been taking Asentra(non-addictive antidepressant) 50mg for a month. On Monday I went to a  normal psychiatrist for the first time( then one month ago it was a hospital psychiatry visit bc i got a referral to a hospital but there was no place for me but this psychiatrist was so kind and lovely even though my apathic and anhedonic behaviour, that visit was for free) and I didn't like it even my mom said that she's not good. She even asked my mom in front of me am i always talking(mumbling) like that. She asked me where I go to school and she told she was going to the same one and then she said "It's not a school that would make you depressed" xd oh i'm sorry the thought that everyone thinks I'm stupid is depressive in school lol and for this and for increasing my Asentra dose to 100mg my mom had to pay ;(
Lately I was thinking a lot that It might be a some other disease(not a thyroid or diabetes bc i've already had the blood test and everything was ok) but once about one year ago i fell of a horse and when i was being transported to a hospital with a helicopter I got a convulsions attack(it was the worst feeling in my life even worse than what i'm getting through now) my heart was pounding about to 200 per minute and i couldn't do anything about that)when we landed medical lifeguards asked me if i had epilepsy i said i didn't think so i hadn't had anything like that before when i barely went to the bathroom i felt dizziness looking into a mirror and then my head leaned to this mirror and my mom caught me before i fell( she said it was like that) i don't remember this moment bc i passed out. What i remember is that felt like dreaming about white(idk xd)
And from that accident when i got more stressed or i thought about something else on clases i was getting derealised.
My dad and grandma has depression.
I was so stressed all day today at school because i had physics tests. of course i studied yesterday and everything but today all the knowledge just  disappeared.
When i feel normal(recently never) I'm making video edits, reading and watching tv series but i don't want to do any of that and if I'm trying I don't enjoy it.
Of course I'm always tired, have digestive problems(i lost 3 kg), headaches, i can't get a comfortable sleep, in general everything hurts.
Tomorrow our school is going to the cinema, but i'm probably  not bc what if i get dizzy and pass out trying to concentrate on Star Wars XD
And i don't have a counselor or psychologist at school but my parents are trying to find me another psychiatrist
It's so good to know that I'm not alone. Wish me luck in finding a knew psychiatrist <3
I hope all of you will feel better <3
ps i was writing this for almost three hours XD
sorry for bad english but you know XD

Clara Elisabeth here’s to getting better! I’m 15 too, it really sucks that the average sort of age for people suffering with mental health issues is so young now

I went to a therapist today because of my depression, dr/dp, eating disorder and panic attacs and like you I’m very young (15) so yay for us hopefully we’ll get better soon

Mollie O. I hope therapy continues to help you down the line! It won't be easy, but believe in yourself as much as you can, because we all believe in you!

And something I've found helpful, if you're struggling with self worth and allowing yourself to be helped ((like me)), is imagining that you are one of your friends. This may sound confusing, but I'll try to explain as best as I can.
Separate your mind 'you' and your visual/physical 'you'. Your mind you is the one who thinks about everything and is the actual you that you feel ((I guess kind of like your soul being)). Imagine that you are looking at your visual self, as if they were your best friend. Your best friend is struggling with so many things and needs so much love and support right now. But they don't love them self enough to get help, or continue with the help they're already getting. You would obviously want to help them even more, right? Well then, help them. That best friend is you, and you are your best friend. You need so much support from yourself and you need to allow yourself to give that support.
I hope that makes any kind of sense ;; if not, feel free to ask me to explain again and I'll gladly find a better way of explaining it!
Being kind to yourself is so tough, but accepting the fact that you do deserve love and support is the first step to getting better. Accepting that fact is one of the most difficult things in the world ((at least for me)), but it'll be so worth it once you get there.

Thanks for reading if you did :)
((I realise now that this was directed at you, but also a big message for myself bc I'm still not in a healthy position yet haha,, but we can work through this together!!))

Mollie O. I hope therapy continues to help you down the line! It won't be easy, but believe in yourself as much as you can, because we all believe in you!

And something I've found helpful, if you're struggling with self worth and allowing yourself to be helped ((like me)), is imagining that you are one of your friends. This may sound confusing, but I'll try to explain as best as I can.
Separate your mind 'you' and your visual/physical 'you'. Your mind you is the one who thinks about everything and is the actual *you* that you feel ((I guess kind of like your soul being)). Imagine that you are looking at your visual self, as if they were your best friend. Your best friend is struggling with so many things and needs so much love and support right now. But they don't love them self enough to get help, or continue with the help they're already getting. You would obviously want to help them even more, right? Well then, help them. That best friend is you, and you are your best friend. You need so much support from yourself and you need to allow yourself to give that support.
I hope that makes any kind of sense ;; if not, feel free to ask me to explain again and I'll gladly find a better way of explaining it!
Being kind to yourself is so tough, but accepting the fact that you do deserve love and support is the first step to getting better. Accepting that fact is one of the most difficult things in the world ((at least for me)), but it'll be so worth it once you get there.

Thanks for reading if you did :)
((I realise now that this was directed at you, but also a big message for myself bc I'm still not in a healthy position yet haha,, but we can work through this together!!))

I could not have put my feelings into any better words than the way you just did. I had my first doctors appointment last week and I’m so glad I went. My mum has been asking me about going since July last year, so I made the decision to say yes. Please please please, know that you aren’t alone in feeling like this. Reach out to me any time you’d like, seems like we feel the same so if you need someone to talk to I understand how you’re feeling. <br>-Liv, The UK x

I could not have put my feelings into any better words than the way you just did. I had my first doctors appointment last week and I’m so glad I went. My mum has been asking me about going since July last year, so I made the decision to say yes. Please please please, know that you aren’t alone in feeling like this. Reach out to me any time you’d like, seems like we feel the same so if you need someone to talk to I understand how you’re feeling.
-Liv, The UK x

Same. I don’t have derealisation but I always find it so hard to concentrate on work. I have to read it over and over before It clicks. Especially if it’s a big piece of writing. I’m not dumb but I think some people think I’m dumb because i find it hard to take things in.

John Laurens same here! I asked like three questions in math class yesterday and my teacher had apparently already answered all of them! It’s so stressful when that happens because now everyone thinks you’re stupid but really you just have a condition! I hope you can find some help too!! It’s so amazing, I didn’t think anyone was going to read my comment but all of these are so reassuring! Xoxo Mollie

AsLovely thx for commenting! Trust me I tried, my school counselors suck! But good advice to anyone else who is struggling with the same issue I have!! Xoxo

Hold on try and get therapy though your your school or doctor x

I’m going through the exact same thing right now, and I’m even fourteen too. You’re not alone <3

Thank you for sharing! I can’t relate that much besides the depression but I think you’re a very strong person and wish you the best of luck on the road to recovery!

I hope that therapy can help you! Thanks for sharing your story, I know it will help somebody too scared to reach out xx

Same, it's just so hard when you have to deal with this at school. I've once forced myself to focus on what the teacher is saying but it felt so blurry but no one knew. I'll try to tell my mom so she can get me a therapist. Hope to recover, hope you do too <3

Hope all goes well! I am also considered an annoyance to my teachers, like I will ask a question and they yell at me for not paying attention but I was, I feel like I just blank out as if there's a tiny hole of my memory from something someone just said or showed is missing, and its hard to focus on classwork, (and that means late assignments ick) and it makes me feel better to see someone my age going through something similar, (oml I suck at writing)


Oh my goodness.... this hit hard, it's so accurate to how I've been feeling this past year.


I was always an anxious kid. My DR/DP started when I had too much wine at prom night when I was 16 😆 Something must have switched off in my brain and everything became numb and dreamlike. 10 years later I've realised that the best way is to just live your best life regardless. DP & DR is your brain trying to protect itself, treat it like it's not a problem and use those numb feelings to your advantage. Overthinking it will trigger the underlying anxiety which was, most likely, already present before DR. I really struggle with memory and concentration as a result of the disorder, this is always at it's worst when I'm tired; make sure you sleep well and stick to routine. We're all in this together and I'm so glad there's a big online community for this now. Take care of yourself and keep sharing your experiences, you're not alone!


the way you described this is really helpful.
I always thought that something is wrong with me
that I'm not really present at the scene,
even though I'm standing there with my friends,
even if I'm there, I'm still missing from the scene.

thank you.


I always feel so weird...like I feel like I’m dreaming and waves of the feeling hits me after I think it’s going away...I can’t describe it


I immediately clicked on this because finally someone feels the same way.

I experience this all the time, for about 3 weeks every month consistently


Thank you for this video! It helped me a lot. I am diagnosed with this condition since 2 years but have it since 5 I guess. At first I thought I was going crazy bc I experience it also all the time. Terrifying.

But we are not alone and we will find a way out! :) or into reality however


basically the last 4 years of my life feel blurry, i can't remember the feeling of being present in our dinner last week, it feels like everything is 2D and I struggle a lot with spacial thinking, which leads me to me being super anxious and scared about driving

This is exactly how I feel. I never feel present and my family doesn’t understand why I hate driving so much.


You’re not alone! I’ve had depersonalization for 11 years. :(


I had just found out about this the other day when I watched your video. I can't say that I suffer from this since I have not been diagnosed but I definitely relate to what you are going through. For the longest time I struggled with remembering things and I felt like the real me died and I was a clone of myself trying to carry on from where I last left off. I struggled with knowing who I was and I felt so alone, like I didn't even have myself which was quite difficult. Every now and again I don't feel like I am me and I have to force myself to be grounded and realize what is going on. Although that part has improved as time has gone on I still struggle with understanding that I am in reality and that every decision I make has an impact on my life. I have fallen incredibly behind on my schoolwork and I often find myself doing a "side quest" instead of what I actually need to do. It is hard for it to click in that I can't waste my days away doing nothing if I have goals of being somebody. I also am always daydreaming and its so vivid that I can't always differentiate my relationships with people in my head versus real life.


It makes it so difficult to learn anything or create anything! I feel nothing 95% of the time and just floating through life. Mine doesn't feel like a dream but like my life is a movie happening through my eyes.

@S R

I have two of those things except mental problems,

I hope.

@S R

I have two of those things except mental problems,

*I hope.*

"my life is a movie happening through my eyes" that's literally how i've tried to explain it as well! I'm so glad i'm not the only one. I've tried many ways of explaining it to myself and I've found that it's sometimes like looking at a painting. When I look at something beautiful like a sunset, i can see that it's there but i don't feel like I'm a part of it. It's like I see every color on its own but not the sunset as a whole piece and I can't take it in and process what it is I'm seeing. It's just there and i can't really enjoy it

Right I feel like my brain is in another world but I can like talk and reply to people

@Simon Bar Jesus I think you have it too. 😂

@Mi Sh and B. Wolfe I feel you guys are spot on

@StrawberrySunset yeah I fell like that a lot but it is really annoying I wish I could get rid of it

@Abbie D sometimes it's like I needa replay this momment or i wanna screenshot this

B. Wolfe if this is true why can’t I hold a job? Why do I have panic attacks a lot? Why do I hate being looked at? Why am I terrified that everything is going to go haywire in this “dream”? Like I’m going to just completely lose it. ): I really don’t like the feeling of not being grounded. It’s scary.

What you’re describing is exactly what true reality is. All of you that experience this means you’re actually closer to your soul self than the rest of us who are firmly planted in the material world. You should delve in to the spirituality of it all and realize that you’re not grounded here, but you are in touch with the higher realms and this truly is just a dream or a movie. I would give anything to be able to experience this truth. I know it’s a dream of being in a movie or a play where I’m looking through my eyes as a projector, but I don’t experience it that way. I only know it intellectually. If any of you decide to start meditating, you’ll probably be downloaded amazing spiritual gifts since you’re much closer to source. Channeling, Clairvoyance, Clairaudience, Clairesentience. Etc

lauren i am currently shook about how much this connects with me

@Alexandra You don't find goals, you create them. Nuanced, sure, but perspective matters.

I fell the same to like I'm in a movie and sometimes I would think something like "what's next " or I would be somewhere and 3 days after I would fell like I had done it yesterday.

i sometimes get these moments where i am like "um what am i doing what is happening" and then just going back to normal. or sometimes i just dont feel anything and come back. that hasnt happened in a while but when it does, it shakes me up😂

@Megan Cassimatis I wish you good luck on your journey through life.

This is a pretty awful handicap but we just have to hope it can be treated one day!

It's probably really common to be misdiagnosed as depressed, many can't comprehend the emptiness we feel. No happiness, but no sadness either, true limbo.

It's thought to be caused by extreme emotional stress, and you can randomly "come back" at any time. 🤞

i feel the same-- i've never been able to completely explain it, but "life is a movie happening through my eyes" is really accurate to me as well


Everything feels like a dream constantly for me too. I actually “woke up” from it randomly one night. I woke up and I was 9 years old again. Suddenly my entire environment fell out of context, I recognized the items that occupied it- but none of it felt like mine. I sat up in bed and was inundated by all of the information that I was suddenly processing over the last 11 years.  I was so tired I passed out again. I “fell asleep” and when I woke up again I felt like I’ve been in a dream again since then. It was like a taste of what it was like to be alive again and it makes me feel really really sad. I don’t know what triggered re-realization for me but I want to figure it out


I didn't know there was an actual diagnosis for this! I've been having a really rough time disassociating and it's affecting everything so horribly! I'm gonna talk to my doctor about this, thank you!!!


I have been feeling this way more and more often and I'm starting to get concerned. I've had a really bad depressive episode for the past couple of months so that could be the reason + quarantine. It feels like when I go out in public, mostly in large places with a lot of lights/people (the mall), I feel like I can't look around. Like yes, I can phisically see, but it's like everything is blurry and confusing and I don't remember any of it later. It's not clear and vivid, it's like I'm dreaming. And then I feel extremely tired and drained and need to rest as soon as I get home. If you're reading this and you have a Derealisation diagnosis, could you share in the comments if you had similar experiences and if you think I should see a doctor?


Hi lovely, just stumbled upon your channel.Thank you for talking about this, I feel so much less lonely watching your videos. <3  I've struggled with BPD for... as long as I can remember and one of my most problematic symptoms is dissociation. I've noticed, however, in the past four years since finding out I was pregnant with my daughter that it is getting progressively worse to the point that I'm now, pretty much, in some dissociated state about 70-80% of my days. I feel like a house and someone is going around shutting the lights off one by one and honestly, I'm terrified. I feel like I'm floating above myself all the time and my world gets less and less vivid. My perinatal mental health nurse wanted to refer me to a neurologist at one point because she wasn't convinced it was possible with a BPD diagnosis. I'm really starting to wonder if chronic dissociation can happen as a result of untreated BPD? I took meds for a while but if anything I think it made it worse, they tried me on different anti-psychotics (aripiprazole, quetiapine and carbamazepine) and my psychiatrist was/is reluctant to keep me under the BPD umbrella but wouldn't refer me for an ASD assessment and never, ever mentioned  DPRD/DPDR to me ever so here's my first ever introduction to those terms. Sorry, this has been an essay... but... yeah, basically, thank you. I think I need to chase this up with my CMHT. xxx


This video was very helpful for me and I realised I had this my whole life! I am now diagnosed and working with a therapist to feel better. Thanks a lot, really thank you!


I came across this feeling lately and had panick attacks associated. Thank you for this video, I wanna seek help. I feel less alone.


I’ve wrote poems about these feelings for what feels like ever and just now finding this video has somehow made everything clear.


I cried the first time I stumbled across this video because I had never heard my exact feelings and sensations put into words so perfectly and it was bizarre because I wasn't even looking for anything related to this or to mental health at all on youtube but it still somehow came up in my recommended videos. Since discovering this over two years ago I've not only discovered my love for Dodie and her music but I too have started my journey to hopefully beating this thing. I've started therapy (twice) once with a therapist who was not a good fit and again recently with a new therapist who I have a better feeling about. She specializes in EMDR therapy which I've heard can help and I'm excited to try. And although I still struggle with all of it I'm hopeful, and this is just my long-winded way of saying thank you thank you thank you for making this.