methylcobalmin form of b12 specifically has helped me some with this problem.  (maybe like an upgrade from logic's limiter to the fab filter limiter lol)

@doddleoddle u could maybe try 500-1000mcg chewable but keep the tablet under your lip while it dissolves so it gets absorbed right into the gum.  maybe it could help, all this shit is endless trial and error.  i feel for ya, it's tough.


what if everyone has depersonalisation cause we're in the matrix but only few of us can notice it

You might be onto something. It seems like you might be ready to wake up. Look up Rubert Spira, Eckhart Tolle and Alan Watts on youtube, it will change your life, it changed mine. Namaste 🙏


“it feels like the highs of being alive have been shrunk” YEP


Sometimes I'll be in class and I'll just start thinking "why the fuck do I even need to pay attention? This doesn't matter. Nothing matters. Why am I stressing myself out? This might not even be real. And even if it is the universe is so big that nothing matters at all." And then it just keeps going and going and going. Fuck my brain dude


People who do not have mental health or neurological problems can also experience depersonalisation when they are in states of fatigue, fear, stress, emotional turmoil or meditation, or after taking drugs like cannabis or Ecstasy...


I am sad you suffer from this Dodie but maybe this is why your lyrics are so resonant to so many people. You write lyrics like no one else and I think maybe your condition is a blessing and a curse for this reason. I really don't mean to offend you. I just thought about it as yu were describing the symptoms maybe your head space allows you to see the world from these amazing perspectives.


Ok so, if we suppose it is BUILD A PROBLEM and we're thinking it's the name of an album or even just a single, she totally has to use a pic of the knitted letters as the cover art to spell out the title.


you look so good i’m so excited for new music aaaaaa


wow I'm just so angry at the "it's okay because it has to be"
I'm like.. NO?? NO, IT'S NOT OK
I mean it is, but it's not. We have to accept it, but we just can't. I can't simply accept it. Ahhh

I knowww I know I know I feel this so hard


Idk what to add to this but wanted to say HI! From a fellow depersonalized human 👋


Covid is making me so depressed and suicidal so well-


the Minnie Riperton moment was beautiful


oh my gosh yes thabk u for mentioning it i’ve felt like a floaty ghost and it’s so so frustrating


Andrew Huberman has been really good information source for me for brain things :)


6:01 "take what you can get" sounds like a song lyric


Have you tried cbt or systemic relational therapy?


does anyone know which lens dodie is using in this video?? ♥♥♥


I just don’t feel real sometimes esp after a flashback


I decidet to commet for the firt time when yous saind that it comforts you. I don't experience depersonalisation, only dissociation as a coping mechanism during panic attacs and it is usually connected to no memorief from that time. Be well


ok but that "lovin you" cover at the end was hilarious lol


hi !! im a newfound member of the dissociation due to intense trauma squad !!


Idk if I have depersonalisation but I have a chronic illness and I relate to feeling like your life is being lived in old worldy sepia tone, and my body doesn’t feel like it’s mine anymore. Every now and then you get zaps of feeling like you’re living your life and in your body but generally you’re living in a cloud of haze. Covid hasn’t felt like the biggest shift if my life, in fact - the frustration I’d feel at not being able to enjoy things like everyone in the pre-covid world has been slightly lifted. The gap between my normal and everyone else’s is finally smaller. But then seeing everyone excited for a post-covid life makes me sad. I know this will be my reality for as long as my illnesses have no cure, and sometimes I wonder if a life in sepia tone is a life i want. But as you say, it’s okay because it has to be. That’s an important thing to remember.


Okay, this was not the main point of what you were saying, but...it's not at all silly to practice gratitude when things are hard; and thank you for the reminder to keep being grateful! I think now more than ever we need to appreciate the things in life that we have. When you lose something, it makes you more grateful for what you have, you know? And it's best to focus on what you have rather than what you've lost, because that's just depressing.

Anyway, thank you for this encouraging video. Looking forward to the official project announcement!


Can depersonalisation/derealisation come in episodes like depression? Because sometimes, especially when I go outside I just feel like I am watching a movie, from the outside or something, like I wasn't really in the moment or in the place where I am at. That feels super weird sometimes. Or like I am in a cloud and everything is a bit foggy and the noises seem further away than they actually are.


My derealisation keeps getting worse and worse... my mind just keeps screaming over and over "is oife even worth it if its like this?" I cant even feel love or happiness... not like i used to

Hey you, I was born on a monday too. I also had suicidal thoughts, but never really considered it, because I always had that fear, that my mind could be wrong and I was real and everyone else I love has to suffer, because I just decided, that it was enough, but now I want to stay alive, that one day I can see clear and take deep breaths again. I just wanted to say: you are not insane! You are important and there is so much, that you can do to make yourself happy again. It won't just disappear, but you can work on it and you can learn to live with it and you can still enjoy life. Take your time. You can do it - I believe in you!


sometimes I feel my dpd isn't bad enough.. or valid enough..


I WAS RIGHT 😁 I don't wanna spoil it though in case some people haven't gotten it 😚


oh boy we going in ladies we talking about the D WORD!!!! i lov u so much for talking about it bc i dont feel insane when you say it THANK YOU so much for helping me so much mentally


idk if hearing about it helps me or gets my dissociation worst


The chord at the beginning reminded me of "Anything"


this is such an interesting connection wow


It's like being in the Truman Show. I hope this gets over before too long. At 70 I don't have all that many years left and this one has been a waste. I'm new here, following you. You help me with your talks. I just want you to know that. At my age the virus is deadly and today I found out I am going to be a grandmother. I need to live. :) You're not only extremely talented but, and you more than likely don't see this and yes, we only get to see 1%, but you have a great outlook on life. You're a good person. I think... :)


You are going through a spiritual awakening. Meditate and close your eyes. You are looking for answers in other realities. That's exactly what you need to do. Tap into your subconscious mind. Smoke some weed. It's great for mental health.


The song at the end when she's screeching! I listen to that song all the time omg I love it!


thanks for saying stuff i don’t have words for


Have you tried EFT you can learn it off YouTube or have a therapist (maybe not at the moment cos of Covid) but it’s good like strangely good (I have dissociative episodes frequently) idk maybe it might help a little ❤


super random, but where is your shirt from? idk why i was immediately drawn to it it’s just... the perfect cozy sweater? also loved the video, the way you talk about this is really nice and honestly comforting ❤


Minnie Riperton would be so proud of that ending


omg i just thought imagine if all the humming at the start of these vids was part of a secret song


I wonder if you even did watch this video
I sent it because i thought it would help
I wonder if you even cared, even just a little bit
I wonder if you rewatch it sometimes and think about me
I wonder if it was just a game to you
Well, you'll go on with your life, maybe being happy (i hope so)
But I'll be here, dissociating, hoping you still think a little bit about me


I feel like shit all the time, and I can’t tell anyone because they don’t understand and just brush it off as something minuscule. But it’s not to me, I feel so alone all the time and this makes me not so alone. All I want is just for people to understand what I’m going through, it feels my parents give my sister more attention for her problems then they do me as hers are more physical and obvious than mine. I don’t mean to compare my issues to hers, really I don’t. It’s just my mind does it anyways. Idk why I’m typing all of this I just am, I just feel so alone all the time and it hurts.


Dodie, not sure if you've already looked into this area before but considering researching "energy work/chakras". I am not sure what other heading to use for that class of information, but anything related to those keywords should work. I am someone who has been depersonalized for maybe a decade now, in a minor form for the first half and a much more severe form during the latter segment. I've felt, and sometimes still feel, quite hopeless. But I have also noticed improvement after reading into and practising the exercises given in the realm of "energy work/chakras". Even though depersonalization is a medical label, and Western medicine would only view it in terms of the brain/central nervous system, I have come to believe in the picture of reality cultivated by the so-called "alternative medicine" sphere, whereby we have a system of energy centers which themselves govern various aspects of our experience. I have witnessed firsthand how I am able to transition between a "foggier" and "clearer" state of consciousness (or feeling more or less connected to my emotions), and where I would previously attribute it solely to the brain I now believe it concerns the energetic composition of ourselves at a given moment (and could also certainly involve the brain as well, the two interacting in some manner). I can produce this change as simply as keeping myself still for a few moments and actively observing the sensations of my body, whereby I will soon observe a feeling of vibration in my body and will immediately feel less depressed, lethargic, and hazy.

Now, I am not asking you to believe in any new ideas here, or to sell you a belief-system, but please look into the above area (google the keywords, and read free PDF's of the books released on the subject) and see if you find any benefit to yourself. I personally think that depersonalization/derealization/dissociation emerges as a result of lower vibration of the first three energy centers (root, sacral, solar plexus), resulting in us feeling "ungrounded, spacey and tired" virtually all of the time. If you can unblock those energy centers, they will vibrate at their original rate and you will feel like yourself again. That's what I imagine anyway, based on what I've seen thus far - I've felt an increased vibration of my lower body result in me feeling uncommonly better in those moments (but I am currently unsure of how to sustain said vibration).

While I am still struggling through this, I also feel a glimmer of hope as a result of my recent experiences. Please don't simply narrate to yourself that "this happened to you, and now it's just going to remain and there's nothing you can do about it, you're simply a victim to it, etc", please try re-evaluating the cause of the condition and seeing whether the models outlined in alternative medicine (involving the body as a multidimensional vibrational-complex) can provide you any improvement where earlier options (pharmaceuticals, therapy, etc) were unable to. Feel free to personally inbox me if you'd like more conversation from a fellow sufferer who surprisingly feels like he's slowly coming out of this years-long nightmare. Sorry if this post is a bit messy and unstructured, just trying to express my budding views.


She is definitely singing something when she is speaking and maybe the song she is singing is like Build a Problem!


hi i have depersonalisation and it’s really bad atm and i can’t stand up lol cus mine really get my balance right in the balls (yay) i’m trying to get help but as you know ITS HARD TO FIND SOMEONE WHO GETS IT. so yeah i is struggle and i’ve also never related to a video more in my life hehe. Fanks xo


3:02--3:13 Me (a music producer): Okay, now you're speaking my language


depersonalization fucking sucks. I feel like I'm sinking into a black hole for a few hours at a time, and just when I think I'm out, it comes back again. derealization is just always there, and always annoying me.


OK For me it's like Clark Kent. AKA Superman! I have a fortress of solitude in my head and one in my room at home. In the daytime I was like the Vampire who shunned the light but at Night I am Boo Radley.
  Recently My brother developed a blood clot in his leg... It all felt like a dream. He was in the hospital for only 3 days but felt like an eternity. When I would got out, by the way without my Aunt Brenda I would most likely have retreated deep within myself. You see My Brother is my anchor outside the fortress of solitude in my head aka The REAL Back to story. Going out I could not function I had to keep my eyes closed touching everything holding onto my Aunt my lifeline  to prove to myself it was real and not the Dream/Matrix peeking out my eyelids before clamping them back shut. It took me 10 min to order a hamburger what would have taken anyone else less than a minute . Sidenote the still got my order wrong. I was forever apologizing for being the way I was. To everyone and to anyone. Even with the Mask I felt like the klutz Clark Kent... My brother is home now but still down with his leg. Our roles are reversed, like I have jumped into an Episode of Quantum Leap.
and I'm realizing...I can never back to the way I was. A whole new plethora of twitches squinting touchy feely ragtag bag of coping mechanisms have popped up, and down the rabbit hole I go. Damn you Alice...   it's nice to know we are not alone...


when im depersonalized which THANK GOD is not all the time<br>is like im a spectator. i see things happening but i cant interact with them, people talk to me and i answer but its not me. im not answering. not really.

when im depersonalized which THANK GOD is not all the time
is like im a spectator. i see things happening but i cant interact with them, people talk to me and i answer but its not me. im not answering. not really.


I don't know what it's like to be really be awake I think.


Hi. Just wanted to say i also suffer from ddd


'you're feeling spacey' sounds so much like a lyric... arms unfolding sequel?


Nice old school South Park reference at the end there. Thank you for that!


Hey Dodie. Not sure if you’ve tried this before but I think you should consider trying out psilocybin mushrooms. The things you’re talking about In the first minute or 2 of this video are exactly the type of things that mushrooms help you ponder and gain new perspectives on. It seems like you almost have a foot in the door of psychedelics at all times. I understand that depersonalization is a disorder and I’m not saying psychedelics will “solve” it. I just believe that you may really enjoy the type of insights that a trip can provide you with. Of course, always do your research before jumping in the deep end. Know what you’re getting yourself into, and trip with a friend.
Always wishing the best (:
-Pierce


it feels like i'm waiting for someone or something to be like haha just kidding and wake me up and take me to the real world or something


hello friend. Thank you,  sending you all love at this moment whatever you're at <3


I feel like my dissociation has gotten worse due to social isolation because my brain literally does not need to be "aware" as much as it did?


I don't think you made it "so complicated' ... I think I get it where you think you are on the "alive/ dead"  spectrum ... and, I'm soo glad you're in between "alive & asleep" and not "dead" ... things are already lookin' up, DC  ... , so ... "Onward & Upward" as you Brits like to say ...


okay i rarely comment on videos but i am going to now.
it wont be a whole story because it doesn't have to be. and thats okay.

i am doing the absolute worst ive ever done, right now.
at the same time i am doing the absolute best ive ever done, because right now i am at least getting help.

nothing has worked so far, but that is fine.
because something will work. and if nothing will then at least i have the hope that something will.

and i will cling onto that hope for as long as necessary. <3


heyyy my dissociated/depersonalised pals, wtf is up my friendsssss, my pals, my comrades, we got this, don’t pinch yourself too hard today, ok?


that scream at the end ahhahahah you fuckin WOKE UP MY DOG XDD


So here's my take on how to explain it... You close you eyes and try to focus on seeing the black of your eyelid, you can't really see it clearly can you? it's like you know its there but you can't seem to focus now try with your hands covering your eyes, now you can see it right?


no one is talking about how 6:00 was 100% a lyric and SHE'S DOING ANOTHER SCRAPBOOK SONG !!!!


it's nice to know it's not just me, so thanks


I have dysphoria and had no idea there was a connection omgggg


I wonder if this is how captive animals feel.


This video made me realize a few things...


Okay since nobody mentioned this in the comments, I'll do it!  Do you date American guys? And what would one do to get a date with you? (Would you date a 32 year old?)


Does your head ever go into a bubble. Like it is floating.


the title is so relatable

edited : this video is so relatable


So our world is depersonalised <br>And your depersonalised world Is depersonalised

So our world is depersonalised
And your depersonalised world Is depersonalised


Hi dodie, <br>I'll be praying for you :) I hope you try talking to God <3 He cares. I wish you the best :)

Hi dodie,
I'll be praying for you :) I hope you try talking to God <3 He cares. I wish you the best :)


totally unrelated but dodie i am 99% sure i have that exact same sweater and i looooove it its my fave!!!


Hey Dodie, I have had severe dp/dr for 2.5 years now. It sucks, and I can totally understand what you are going through. It's the worst feeling in the world. But I feel in slowly but surely recovering, there is this one particular channel that has helped me, you might want to give it a shot. Search "Jordan Hardgrave" on YouTube. I really hope you get out of it, and based on my own research, it seems to say that everyone can recover.


At first I agreed with ‘build a problem’ but now I see the L is between the B and E so now I’m unsure


6:46 sounds like she’s singing scrapbooky again WAHHHHHHH


at 3:18 she says "you're feeling spacey" with a singsongy lilt and I wonder if she's doing another hidden song thing :0


clicking on the ads as a thank you for the new content :) #dont call me a hero


I feel like there are maybe the titles of songs being said somewhere in the videos? Like some of the words dodie says just sound like lyrics or titles of songs, like when she says "take what you can get"


Dodie - can I recommend the work of Nicole Sachs? She talks about chronic pain primarily but she’s a psychotherapist on the cutting edge of why the brain gets stuck in chronic loops, basically. Her YouTube, podcast and Instagram are all really informative and cool (and free) 🥰 (Dodie gang: please give this comment a thumbs up so it has a bigger chance of Dodie seeing it, I’m convinced it could really help her!) xx


The smiley face in the back trying so hard to get into focus


I’ve convinced myself that nothing is real and I stopped caring completely

Hey you, I just wanted to say, that I still care. I care about you, because I want you to be happy. I want you to know, that you are loved and that I know, that the most real thing in life is love. Everything else might seem weird and not real, but love is. You can do it. I believe in you.


u hv the most adorable personality in the world <3


wait wait wait.. are we just NOT gonna talk about that majestic intro or?


Its like your asleep and everyone else is awake


dodie where did you get that shirt because it is the perfect color and the perfect style and i love it


when she quoted dear even hansen...

im in love

when she quoted dear even hansen...

*im in love*


Im sad thinking once she spell the word and the album comes out she wont post as much


you know that video of miley cyrus screaming ‘what does it mean’ at the piano that’s me with build a problem


Its even worse when you have both covid  and depersonalision

Edit: i cant spell i apologize
*depersonalization


6:46 “ SHE LITERALLY SANG “so many thingssss” DODIE ARE U HIDING ANOTHER SONG IN UR VIDEOS


ok we know the words now but is she going to connect them and make a big blanket at the end?? I hope sooooo


dodie have you listened to the musical SIX? It seems like a thing you would be really in to!


i have chronic disassociation, its because of a lot of mental illness, trauma, dysphoria and the like, covid is probably the worst thing for my disassociation, because i have severe adhd and this sort of muted, inside, self focused way of life is prob the most anxiety inducing thing that could happen for my brain,, like i need chaos and stimulus and the good kind of noise and too much that i could get back in 2019,, i understand what you mean dodie, ive been having chronic depressive episodes and i cant remember the last time that i felt that kind of almost too much happy.


i haven’t seen a comment about it yet this video, she keeps singing a word or a phrase and idk if she’s doing the hidden song thing again or if she’s just now singing randomly without purpose. cause tbh i do that sometimes BUT there could be a hidden song


Spoilers for the Miley Cyrus episode of Black Mirror.
Near the end of the episode, it is revealed that the little doll actually has a full copy of the pop star’s brain that has just been limited. Now she can only answer questions and talk about music and say child appropriate things.
I say dissociation kinda feels like that like you have a limiter put on your brain and you can think the same way you used to. Also sometimes it feels like my brain is too full to have room for any thoughts and other times it feels like my brain is an empty cavern and thoughts just can stick in there anymore. It’s weird and not very fun


As soon as I saw the caption - YESSS, EXACTLY!!!


its build a problem!

okay im suuuuper excitedd. can't wait.


Isn't that derealization rather than depersonalization?


WAIT UH I FEEL LIKE THAT ALL THE TIME?????! WHAT


6:00 sounds like it would be part of a hidden song ? Maybe lol ?


I am always depersonalizing. This shit really sucks. You articulate it so well. It’s ok, because it has to be


Nuh uh I hear you singing in your sentences, you're not getting us twice


Is it an album...? An ep? A song...? A NEW BOOK....??????


feelin v safe and comforted in this comment section


SHE SANG SO MANY THIIIINGS WHAT DOES IT MEAN


think the hums at the beginning are from when!


ummm you do realise the more you think about it then you get it if you want to get rid of it just forget and live it i had it months ago during lockdown and i was on the verge of killing myself since i thought if i died i would wake up but i just lived my life abd i forgot abt it and was fine then recently i remebered about it and it came back but not as bad so ineed to stop thinking about it and not let it involve my life and it helps :D just a tip my dpdr isnt as bad as yours i can tell good luck


hi to you aswell. and yes, we do got this.


H.....i de-what....you know....I'm thankful I try really hard.. I want to talk to you but why....thanks


Unrelenting, laborious psycho-education and mindfulness.  It's the only real answer.  If you don't have the determined commitment of a ballerina or Olympic athlete to learn about your condition and sit with it and watch it, you will never free yourself from it.


Also have it but thinking about it kind of scares me


Hello everyone I just wanted to let you know I have a best friend in the whole wide world. My best friend knows exactly how I'm feeling while I'm thinking she always has the right answers knows how to comfort me love me forgive me and give me hope. The thing is he can also be your best friend also. His name is Jesus Christ. I want a few years where I felt like there's this Dark Cloud following me around I couldn't stop feeling that way. It was after some friends stops being my friend because they are afraid that I might get persuaded by some other friends. They were wrong. But we were really good friends it's all right really hurt me for a few years how they stop being my friend. I feel like Jesus use that time so let me know how much I need him and I've grown to where I can confidently say he is my best friend. He will never let you down he's there for you 24/7 he never sleeps he never grows weary.


Didn't know this many people also had this


having experienced dissociation from other mental health concerns, and how frightening it can be sometimes to feel like you're Not Here, i really empathise with how depersonalisation must feel. thanks for being open to talking about this sort of thing and helping educate people through real human stories!!


i’m so glad i found u right when it started getting bad. you make me feel like i’m not alone in this new “alternate reality” world i live in. thank u dodie for continuing to talk to us about it and for continuing to be here <3


I’m living for these videos Dodie! It feels so validating and healing to hear these types of topics spoken about so frankly and thoughtfully. So thank you! Also great to see your cute self gurlll, loving the green 💕💁♀🌱✨


heyyyy ur the one who made me realize i have derealisation !!! and it’s rly helped me knowing that i’m not alone and that others feel this way bc i feel like no one ever talks about it especially not as much as other mental illnesses. but i thank you for being so open about it and thank you for all that you’ve done bc you’ve really helped me and so many others<333


Thank you for being so open with us, it always feels like we’re just catching up with a friend. Honestly your music and your videos helped me so much with accepting (or at least trying to accept) myself when all this time I felt like no one could understand me. Thank you and I love you dodie


these videos have been such a comfort. i love how open you are about everything and how loving you are to total strangers. we love you more than you know 💕


ever since i realized i struggled with derealization a few years ago, dodie has always been one of the voices that just makes sense. it’s so frickin hard explaining it to people because it’s hard for me to wrap my head around!! but hearing other people talk about it is suuuuch a relief. thank u pals and thank you dodie <3 i hear you and i have your backs, like you have mine.


Dodie, you're amazinggggggg. You're such an amazing role model, and you're so beautiful too. I hope you're doing well, or better than normal anyways


I absolutely had never thought of it this way and wow its so spot on. I adore whenever you talk about depersonalization as i also suffer from it!


hello! i am turning 16 in one week, life is still young yet my hopefulness is of an old man. hearing you go through that list of doctors and brain scans and all that and still staying hopeful and kind is beautifully inspiring to me :) and it makes dealing with anxiety just a little more bearable! thanks dodie xx


Thankyou for still talking about this, I started watching you when I was 15 and I’m 21 now and still feel so comforted by your voice 💕


thank you for spreading awareness about depersonalization. i found out that i have this due to my PTSD and i understand myself so much better now. love you dodes


I had my first and 4 month long episode right at the beginning of quarantine and still feel horrible. I wouldn't say it's completely gone for me, I still seep back in a few times a day and I can't look at my hands anymore but I'm better mostly. Your old video really helped at first when I didn't know what was going on.


I also have dpdr, I’ve had it for as long as I can remember but it became completely fully chronic six years ago, literally the only thing that helps me is distracting myself, I’m always doing a million things at the one time and people tell me not to take on so much but it really helps me from sinking into it, I just recognise that I feel this way and try to move on by being productive xx


dodie actually helped me come to the realization I have depersonalization a couple years ago. it started as a very deep depression and now I've been through therapy and I've learned to cope blah blah.  today was my first day back in person at school and wow did I notice actually how spacey I was this whole time it's insane how much you really don't realize it after you've lived with it for so long or something big happens and you're like wow


You helped me realize I was in a derealized state for years too. Its still a constant so it doesnt feel as different with Covid. Im always glad to know Im not the only one who feels like the world isnt real all the time. It heavily messes with my ability to perceive time though. Ugh.


I've used pretty much the exact same explanation to explain medicated depression. That feeling of having a ceiling that you just can't push through to get to that same level of joy. Helps a lot to see one of my idols feeling something similar but thriving despite it. <3


thank u dodes for spreading awareness for depersonalization!! thanks for using ur platform babe 🥰


This! All of this! There are some days it’s fine and others where I have a panic attack because i feel like I’m not real and not fully living life. Some days it does help though. If there’s a stressful event or smth, it really is like a cushion like you said. Just my brain freaking out for too long lmao


my experience with depression and depersonalised definitely shifted when I realised sometimes I just have to use methods to make it less awful rather then completely better 💜 I personally find depersonalisation way easier to deal with because it’s so calming? has dodie made any videos about her experience with treatments or therapies because all my NHS experiences were incredibly negative and frankly unhelpful

what methods have you used if you don't mind sharing? i'm so glad you're feeling better, sending love <3


This is very real. I have similar problems with depersonalization and, while COVID is definitely causing more of that, Ive been pretty lucky. I went into this not living with my father, for one thing. Fuck I'm so grateful that I'm not around him anymore. I probably wouldn't have made it this far, honestly. I'm grateful that I'm starting to go on anti-anxiety meds that I think are working somewhat for me. We need to cling to what we have more than ever right now.


DODIE! IF IT WASNT FOR U I WOULD STILL BE LIVING IN CONSTANT FEAR BECAUSE OF MY DEREALIZATION! I WOULDNT HAVE RECOGNIZED IT AS A MENTAL ILLNESS! THANK YOU SO MUCH!


I recently got diagnosed with depersonalization. The way you explain it is exactly how ive felt before covid. Now  i keep slipping into this dream space and have to avoid the news all together cause im easily triggered. But im working on it with my therapist. Im trying. Anyways thanks dodie. its nice to not feel alone.


Thank you for being so open with us, it always feels like we’re just catching up with a friend. Honestly your music and your videos helped me so much with accepting (or at least trying to accept) myself when all this time I felt like no one could understand me. Thank you and I love you dodie


It’s so nice to hear that our comments make you feel less alone cause your videos make me feel less alone and I feel like we’re all one big weird spacey family :’)


I just wanna say thanks as I have been feeling similar symptoms that I never knew was a thing because I have always felt them. Your videos have helped me feel less different as I know that there are people like me


I do not have dpd but watching your videos definitely helped me realized that I had expirenced some moments of depersonalization and it just sucked, I would be living my life and then something shifted in my eyes and ears so everything felt far away and seemed like a dream and I had to go to classes I would almost never remember what happened and just find notes in my notebook and have a vague memory and tried to go from there<br>So I'm sending good vibes for you and all the folks that live with dpd

I do not have dpd but watching your videos definitely helped me realized that I had expirenced some moments of depersonalization and it just sucked, I would be living my life and then something shifted in my eyes and ears so everything felt far away and seemed like a dream and I had to go to classes I would almost never remember what happened and just find notes in my notebook and have a vague memory and tried to go from there
So I'm sending good vibes for you and all the folks that live with dpd


my boyfriend recently started experiences symptoms of dissociation and what sounds like depersonalization from the symptoms you described. Do you have any advice for a partner of someone going through this?


After all these years of following you and as many times as I’ve heard you talk about DPD I feel like this is the first times get it. Dissociation isn’t a big part of my mental health mess, but it’s there and I finally know what’s up a little better so... 👍🏻


I live with depersonalisation too. Glad to hear you talking about this. I thought about the topic of this video a lot during all the covid stuff. It really is comparable.

I know you'll read this, so please keep going. You are a great person and we may not feel real, basically all the time, but the words you say and things you express remind me that you are real. Thanks dodie.


i’m glad you bring more awareness to this condition, i was diagnosed with it early this year and when i tell people they either say “wow, cool!” or “we all have out of body experiences every once in a while”, and for me it’s definitely not every once in a while. it’s different for everyone but no matter what it’s a difficult thing to go through. if anyone out there is going through it, it will get better. i promise, i love you and you are so strong <3


It’s so crazy to me that you just posted this because just a few hours ago I discovered that I have this disorder as well and I watched the videos you made with Katie about it


I love having the subtitles, I like having them on since it helps my brain process. Auto-generated can sometimes make it mode tricky but the subtitles on Dodie’s videos really help :))


This is exactly how I’ve been feeling for a few years now, the way you described it everything. What do I do?😅 I always feel like I’m never ‘living life to the full’ and that worries me all the time that I’m never soaking in a moment well enough. It feels like walking around the morning after a night out and still being drunk, but cloudy and that’s a constant.

@cela Yes we are not alone! I saw so many people online talking about this, I had to do it a couple of times for a class I was following and it was horrible. I usually also get a similar effect when putting on sunglasses. Happy I could help :D

@Martina i thought i was the only one who got worse when i meditated! glad to see other people experience the same thing. thank you for the advice :)

Hi! I've had derealisation for the past five years, and I highly recommend therapy! You can slowly figure out why your mind put up this barrier, and guided by a professional you could even find ways to tear it down! And with the help of a psychologist you could even explore different treatments if you feel like just therapy isn't enough, from meds to the other things dodie talked about in the video. But since every treatment path starts from therapy, I would recommend starting there ^^ if you can't afford it though you can search online for grounding techniques for now, daily exercises that you can try to feel more present. Also I wouldn't recommend meditation, personally it makes my dissociation way worse for the day. I hope this was helpful, you can do it!! 🖤


I've followed you off and on since...I dunno, 2012? 2015? I think it's great you're understanding yourself better, I think I have bouts of depersonalization sometimes. I think I have more of an anxiety limiter on my excitement, I've never been someone who screamed in excitement about things. I have noticed I feel more fully <b>in</b> myself when I do aerobic dancing regularly, particularly in a class with other people, but also if I do it at home. I think it helps integrate me with my body, and the exercise intensity helps--I started dancing to help with my back pain, and I struggle to balance activity and rest levels for my back and my brain health. =/

I've followed you off and on since...I dunno, 2012? 2015? I think it's great you're understanding yourself better, I think I have bouts of depersonalization sometimes. I think I have more of an anxiety limiter on my excitement, I've never been someone who screamed in excitement about things. I have noticed I feel more fully *in* myself when I do aerobic dancing regularly, particularly in a class with other people, but also if I do it at home. I think it helps integrate me with my body, and the exercise intensity helps--I started dancing to help with my back pain, and I struggle to balance activity and rest levels for my back and my brain health. =/


So...dodie got me through my lowest point and now covid. Thank you for always being so amazing dodie, even if you don't feel it, you light up the...screen? 😘😘


My disassociation comes in bouts, so I've found the best way to describe it in my case is that it happens whenever I get too stressed. It's like my brain can't handle the stress and tries to mentally pull me away from it. However, since my physical body still exists, it just creates this weird middle ground where I'm not stressed anymore, but my brain has done its job at pulling me out of the situation so efficiently, that I now feel as if nothing is real because my brain is refusing to process the information.


proud of you <3 ur a wonderful human being and i’m v grateful for you and your art


you replied to my tweet when i asked about the unlisted videos which helped me through 8th grade and i just want to say how much i appreciate it, and how much i appreciate YOU. I often just listen to you for hours and cry to the saddest of your videos and it feels so nice and relieving.
This video makes me feel very nostalgic because it reminds me so much of my sad times. It’s not a bad thing how nostalgic it feels, it just makes me feel better and makes me realize how much i’ve grown in the past 4 years
you made me feel less alone in my hardest times, thank you x


Thank you Dodi, I suffered with depersonalization for a long time and it was mostly during a period of extreme depression and anxiety. It was so hard to express what I was going through to others. Thanks for speaking about it. I just read your book and it was wonderful! I’m a musician and writer as well and I have been through so much. Good luck to you and remember it might get better Some day, your still very young. You are amazing and special!


I really wish I didn't understand what derealization feels like (and I am trying to seek therapy) but I am pretty sure I am in that space daily. I knew, even at 15, that this could happen. I am just glad you (dodie, if you are reading this, you are the you I am writing to) have shared your story so that I can maybe get help.


I have started to feel my reality shift back into place really slowly. I am sure it will take years to get to a contant state of feeling awake, but the moments of clarity become brighter and louder, smells get stronger and the presence of people warmer. Its a long process, but it is teaching me patience and gratefulness for getting to experience life without disassociation as a state of normal. Because i know i will get out of the cloud. I can see the sun peaking through. Thats what it feels like


hello dodie i just want to say thank you for these videos ;; everyday i have something to look forward to and your videos just feel very warm and grounding<br>ive been watching your videos for years and ive always drawn inspiration from them, i can honestly say i wouldnt have achieved the things i have if it wasnt for you (i also write songs theyre not as good but theyre decent enough HFHFHH). also,,through your videos about depersonalisation,,i learned more about it and it pushed me to actually dig deeper about it because the experiences youve described are similar to what ive been feeling since i was 10. im 19 now and im still trying to figure out What exactly i have, or if im just plainly going insane (lol). wow this comment got rly long im sorry anyway i love u have a great day

hello dodie i just want to say thank you for these videos ;; everyday i have something to look forward to and your videos just feel very warm and grounding
ive been watching your videos for years and ive always drawn inspiration from them, i can honestly say i wouldnt have achieved the things i have if it wasnt for you (i also write songs theyre not as good but theyre decent enough HFHFHH). also,,through your videos about depersonalisation,,i learned more about it and it pushed me to actually dig deeper about it because the experiences youve described are similar to what ive been feeling since i was 10. im 19 now and im still trying to figure out What exactly i have, or if im just plainly going insane (lol). wow this comment got rly long im sorry anyway i love u have a great day


It is also a symptom of Migraine! I take migraines with Aura as well as vestibular migraines and both cause me to have derealization and depersonalisation! Sometimes it's just my hands that aren't real and sometimes it's the whole world


Permission to say how much we love dodie and how much we support her! You have got me through so many problems in my life and this message is my metaphorical hug and love to you ❤


Your videos always make my day, just like having a lil chat with a pal :)


You're a saint. Your work keeps me present 🙌💓💫


ive heard you talk about it depersonalization, but didn't understand the experience until recently in the past few months. thank u for making me aware of what it is!!! it feels so strange and it helps to know that its a real thing


ever since u made ur first depersonalization video, I have felt so much better knowing that I wasn’t just doing something wrong or making up feelings! I don’t really know if I have it, but I definitely experience the dreamy/absolutely spaced out feeling. I always catch myself trying to snap myself back into reality. :,)


We don't even imagine how that's supposed to feel, but we are here, always, admiring you, and supporting you, thank's for helping me to escape from the world with your music...


i'm pretty sure i have DPDR. i thought it was normal to just constantly feel like this until i started looking it up. i constantly feel like im lucid dreaming. my mind just doesn't connect with my body and this world, it feels off and hazy.


I hadn't even heard of depersonalization until a few weeks ago when Miki Ratsula talked about having it and holy fudge pops, did I perk up at that. I've literally felt like this my whole life. Thank you for doing this video, dodie. I really appreciate it.


i’m so glad u can share your story comfortably😌🖤


I really appreciate you speaking about depersonalization because I think you are the first person I've encountered who also experiences constantly like I do. I have had depersonalization and basically been in a deep state of disassociation every second of my life since I was at least 4, but quite possibly earlier. I have very distinct memories as a child of having fun and then saying something to the effect of "I really wish this was actually happening!". Basically, nothing in my life has every felt real, even if I know it is. It's weird to hear you talk about a before you can compare you life to, since that is something I just have never had. I used to have a really hard time with motivation and doing things because it all felt like a dream and like it wasn't real so it didn't really matter to me. Even though that has gotten better with time, I frequently have to remind myself that things in my life are actually happening.

It's still a thing I am working on dealing with. It's nice to hear other people struggle with this too, because for years I didn't even know there was a word for what I was experiencing. Thank you for sharing  :)


This was really calming I feel like I needed it


Thanks for the video! I appreciate your thoughts and insights


Dodie I’m so happy that we have this little community and we are all able to come together on this topic and actually have open conversation about it. It sucks. Majorly. I don’t have it chronically but I do experience it quite often and my love goes out to you always. <br>ALSO if the answer is BUILD A PROBLEM  i say again you are a lovely little genius and it is such a beautiful phrase !

Dodie I’m so happy that we have this little community and we are all able to come together on this topic and actually have open conversation about it. It sucks. Majorly. I don’t have it chronically but I do experience it quite often and my love goes out to you always.
ALSO if the answer is BUILD A PROBLEM  i say again you are a lovely little genius and it is such a beautiful phrase !


2 years ago when I first was just really really depressed it was just the worst thing but a year after, its everything like everything kicked in and I realized for weeks it felt like I was dreaming so much like nothing wasnt rea, I disnt recognize myself in a way it felt like I was a strangerl. I didnt make much of it. I thought it would go away lol. But 6 months later I'm here. Diagnosed with depersonalization and derealization. Just like oh. Now I know. It makes more sense. It's like a sense or a wave of feeling calm when depersonalization kicks in for me it really helps my anxiety. But sometimes I become quite angry with myself and everyone and everything :)<br>Also every video so far that dodie has made talking about this. It makes just perfect sense lmao

2 years ago when I first was just really really depressed it was just the worst thing but a year after, its everything like everything kicked in and I realized for weeks it felt like I was dreaming so much like nothing wasnt rea, I disnt recognize myself in a way it felt like I was a strangerl. I didnt make much of it. I thought it would go away lol. But 6 months later I'm here. Diagnosed with depersonalization and derealization. Just like oh. Now I know. It makes more sense. It's like a sense or a wave of feeling calm when depersonalization kicks in for me it really helps my anxiety. But sometimes I become quite angry with myself and everyone and everything :)
Also every video so far that dodie has made talking about this. It makes just perfect sense lmao


The harmonies at the start of her videos make me so happy oml


This was a learning experience for me, Thanks!


I have DP/DR too and it sucks so much, It's almost like I live in my mind and I'm not present as much as I'd like to be, it's so weird. I also have an eating disorder, panic disorder, and PTSD which just makes everything worse. It's so weird to have and covid is just the cherry on top :'-)


I’ve been having boughts of what could be called depersonalization as of late, and I’ve been working through it. It’s been really really scary. I think I’ve had it before, but at the time, I focused more on the anxiety and depression side of things. Working on it with my therapist at the moment. TLDR, ummm I really appreciate hearing someone else talk about it. I mean, it’s a confirmation that I could be real in what I’m feeling. So yeah. Thank you dodie. For everything.


it's definitely build a problemm. can't wait for the official announcement/reveal to happen!!


It's videos like this that help me realize other people suffer from similar feelings


I've had derealisation / depersonalization for so many years, I noticed it the first time when I was 14 and got drunk for the first time. Recently it lessened a LOT, or at least stopped being a negative for the most part. I really wish I knew what happened to make it better, I think maybe it was leaving school finally and healing from that experience? It really breaks my heart that I don't have exact advice for someone like you that still suffers with it horribly since I don't know for sure what helped :(((( I remember how hopeless it felt when it wouldn't stop. My instinct though is that part of it was this: accepting that worrying about not remembering something later, or not "making a good memory", is not going to get you anywhere; you have to accept that how you're experiencing things is the best you're going to get, at least for now, so enjoy whatever version of reality you are experiencing. No matter how foggy or distant. Sometimes it can even be nice - I used to hate getting drunk because it made my dissociation worse, but in my late teens in leaned into it and it helped me feel less anxious in a way because I was actively taking control of my cognition, not just "letting" my mind float away. I used to treat dissociating a bit like being tipsy. Even if your friends are in the room with you and laughing and talking and you feel yourself floating away, or getting sluggish, or like you can't talk, or like you're in a little muffled bubble (all things I've felt), you have to forgive yourself in that moment and not punish yourself for not having enough fun. Because all that happens is that later you look back and punish yourself even more for the same reason! Easier said than done I know, but accepting things as they are and that bad and good things will ebb and flow is something I learned a few years ago (I lost a few family members) and it is honestly such a relief to finally relax in that way.
I do still dissociate sometimes, often when I'm tired in the evening I become somewhat manic and become kind of unaware of how I'm being perceived. I also seem to "forget" or outright miss conversations, at least my parents seem to suggest that, because quite often I'll get upset at sudden plans and then my mum will look at me with a pained expression and say something like "Lau we talked about this at dinner last night and you said okay" which is really disturbing. I wonder if you experience that.
I also have panic attacks (though barely since I went on medication) and really bad travel sickness so I use dissociation to sort of escape that.


I have a friend with this, and sometimes I’m not really sure how to help. Do you feel like your friends (maybe Hazel, since you live together) are good at recognizing the signs and noticing when you are spacey? Is it nice to have some people who can notice what’s going on and bring you out of a bad episode? What’s the best thing for someone in my position to do to help someone with this condition cope? thanks xx


ı actually discovered that i had dpd thourgh your videos i had never heard about it before and so i reseached it and i was so scared the first i time i thought about it, unfortunetly im not in a position to get help so just feels like im falling deeper and deeper. Although it really helps when you talk about the advice that your therapist gives you. Oh and the best description of the feeling of dpd i came up with is that its lik you re constantly wearing VR googles and you cant take em off.


I feel this too; I often dissociate and have the exact symptoms you described. I used to absolutely hate it, I felt I had no control, like a terrible bad dream. It scared me. But now I notice it comes on when I feel overwhelmed with emotion, like when I'm struggling with something tough. So I chose to look at it like you said, a cushion. <br>Now it's not so bad. It's just my brain protecting me from hurting myself. So I've learned to almost like it, like in a way I can breathe again in my bubble until it's safe, instead of feeling choked. Hope this helps. 💕

I feel this too; I often dissociate and have the exact symptoms you described. I used to absolutely hate it, I felt I had no control, like a terrible bad dream. It scared me. But now I notice it comes on when I feel overwhelmed with emotion, like when I'm struggling with something tough. So I chose to look at it like you said, a cushion.
Now it's not so bad. It's just my brain protecting me from hurting myself. So I've learned to almost like it, like in a way I can breathe again in my bubble until it's safe, instead of feeling choked. Hope this helps. 💕


going through depersonalisation when i was 14 was quite a scary time


I feel like I experience that symptom sometimes when I get extremely anxious or when I feel like I'm going to have a panic attack instead of going through it I just slip away and I don't get it! I don't know if this is it but it sounds like it... Pretty scary if you ask me


I feel guilty because I personally love being at home and not having to make up excuses to not leave is quite a relief... 😬 I know this is not the way it is for many though and I wish you good luck!


as someone who didn't know they had dprp before seeing your videos on it, you have been a blessing for me, thank u doodlenoodle


Listening to you talk about depersonalisation makes me think i need to go back to my doctors and talk more about it to them. I know that i get spacey and dissociated, but i think it might be a bigger issue than i thought.


You video back in summer 2016.. you know the one... is what actually gave me a name for what I experience so thank you for that. You have helped me in so many ways. thank you thank you thank you


even writing this feels like something crazy, but these past few weeks i've just been on a downwards spiral, and watching your videos and finally being able to put a name to something and to more clearly identifiy what has been affecting me for, god i dont even know maybe 4 years, is really making me hopeful for what comes next, even though i'm at the lowest point in my life (and it could be worse but i still dont like it) i'm hopeful bc i listen to your songs and i see where you are 5 years ahead of me and i can see that there's a way to live, a way to make it better. i'm also big into music although pretty scared of making it even tho i'd love to, and listening to your music and watching your experience and growth is something amazing, and i'm so glad to have found you on this silly crazy platform that is youtube. keep doing you and working this out, we're all in this together!


Oh you're so right! I read the title and didn't see the connection immediately, but after your explanation I agree. I've had derealisation 24/7 for the past five years, it started around six months before you started making videos about it, and I immediately felt so seen in a time when everything felt so weird and bad. With time I discovered that my mind put up the barrier to separate me from the anxiety that my mother radiates every day, and since I'm going to seriously tackle the problem with my therapist as soon as I leave home (and I still have to wait a few months, for now I need the protection it gives me) in the meantime your videos and music are helping me so much. Especially the song Guiltless, it describes perfectly my relationship with my mother (I cried so much at your concert hahaha but it was beautiful, I'm happy I managed to see you in Milan). Thank you for everything, seriously. Your songs and videos are incredibly soothing, and your words are always really helpful. Stay strong, we can do it, and we will get out of it someday 🖤


I have low level bouts of depersonalisation (more derealization) generally but it creeps in more when my OCD is bad. because of a few life events and covid (obviously) I'm in an OCD relapse and the dp/dr is STRONG, thank you for continuing to share your life experience with it. it's just like you said, it's nice to feel like theres a community of people out there experiencing something similar


Your beautiful as always dodie your a beautiful woman inside and out I hope you find some relief from depersonalasion love you dodie you are so honest and real and relatable


Videos like this make me wonder if I have depersonalization-- I knew exactly what feelings you were trying to explain.


you give me hope. for myself and for the planet.


I started crying because I just always feel so seen when dodie describes DPDR and how she feels because it makes me feel like I'm not the only one constantly dreaming or spaced out


yh I've had intense anxiety that's led to bouts of recovery/detachment personalisation more recently, after having had anxiety and depression for 3.5 years, but this was really helpful, thanks


I also suffer from dpd and you make me realise that I'm not alone


Hold the Line everyone! you're going to be okay goddess! everybody keep fighting don't give up! For the Gods SKÅL


It's so ridiculously unfair that because we have this condition we can only enjoy these restricted highs and lows. You say for now but it honestly feels like it will never change. Regardless, watching someone talk about it like you do so calmly soothes me so much. I'm not alone!! I love and appreciate your videos so much thank you thank you thank you

<3333 it sucks v bad and I indulge in that feeling some times but mostly I just have to try and accept it<br>I understand I understand! Sending so much love to u my spacey pal

<3333 it sucks v bad and I indulge in that feeling some times but mostly I just have to try and accept it
I understand I understand! Sending so much love to u my spacey pal


im a little tipsy, but this helped so much. im so hard on myself and this let me be less hard on myself for feeling shitty sometimes, thanks <3


I have depersonalisation due to trauma and no one that I know understand what I go through on a daily basis and think that I’m making it up for attention. Seeing others share their experiences with it makes me feel so much better and gives me hope that it won’t always be terrible💜


hearing people talk about derealisation has made me want to look into it more because i’ve been getting those symptoms for years and everyone i talk to about it just blows it off as me being tired,,,,,, i think i’d like to talk to someone about it properly so thank you for spreading sm awareness love u dodes <33333


I used to only have depersonalization on very rare occasions, as kind of a safety mechanism of my brain when I had too much going on and the anxiety was to hard. I switched out for a while feeling really numb and zombie like. But recently, after all this pandemic situation, that has, besides, coincide with some very important changes in my life. Finishing uni, moving back to my parents, starting to work from home... I have been feeling it more as a long term thing. I haven't got used to it yet and I don't know how long this is going to last but I feel really spaced out. Everything is like is not real, like my brain hasn't processed it as something real, but it's still happening around me. It's hard to focus on anything that is not work and work feels very mechanic. My impulses, my intense emotions are dulled out. My third niece was born just a few weeks ago and I could compare it to how it felt with her siblings first, so many emotions, and this time was like well she's here already? Like I could not really believe what has happened. Every memory before lockdown feels like a dream. It's like this has put my life on pause. But life it is in fact going on, and I feel like I am missing it.


always love how dodie shows how mental illness and talking about it and getting help is nothing to be ashamed of, and the way she does it is so well done. side note though, when she says most of us have figured out the letters, I really haven’t so can someone explain😅 is it an album? a single?

We haven't figured out what it's for but we know it's most likely "build a problem" (with a slight doubt for the first word)


Today was a day my dissociation won... i almost quit my job and other scary things.... but this helped... thanks dodie


Hello. It is a community. Thank you for speaking about it. It means a lot.


i wouldn’t say i have depersonalization on the daily, but i slip into those symptoms sometimes when having a panic attack. and yeah like dodie said it’s like a cushion your brain creates instead of feeling a panic attack and tbh i prefer it to the traditional panic attack 😂


Does depersonalization and derealization feel different for different people? I have something that I think is derealization that happens when I get really anxious.

Different people have different experiences and symptoms. For example some people mentioned masks can trigger it for them whereas it doesn't for me. Its really common to be caused by anxiety too.


I don't have depersonalization (or at least, not diagnosed). But the way she described it. There have definitely been times when I've felt exactly like that. It's nice to know that it's not an "only me" feeling tbh


I don’t want to self dignose or anything but this happens all the time to me and it really causes me to panic and worry yk. But when I’ve tried to talk to people about it and they just think I’m crazy. Is there any tips I could use to talk to people properly about it? Xx


Do you get it in different intensities? I have BPD and experience derealisation and depersonalisation but experience it from “zoning out” and feeling distant to having episodes where my brain totally disconnects and I can’t move or talk and if I’m standing I’ll collapse and and I get kinda weird seizure symptoms.... I feel very alone with this as I don’t think dissociation is talked about or understood enough, even within the mental health community and healthcare system


does your depersonalisation ever make it hard to remember stuff because your brain doesn't focus hard enough on what's going on?

dude yes. I think it can also happen because of trauma.


I really like your explanation. The way you see your depersonalization is a little bit different from the way I see mine, but it’s nice to hear what it’s like from someone else’s perspective. Mine feels like I’m trapped in my house, looking through the window at the world outside. I really wanna go outside, but I can’t figure out how to get out of my house. So instead I just sit by the window, watching everybody else have fun outside, and pretend I’m outside, too.


Wait.... this is how I have felt for 10 years....  holy shit! I feel like in shock a bit at the moment. Also not as alone. Can you start a support group? Lol🥰

@doddleoddle i didn’t know it was an actual condition- my doctor just said that it was due to my anxiety disorder but I keep telling them that I only have anxiety and panic and depressed mood from the episodes of depersonalization. Like you. I am at the point now where I have just accepted it. For a while I couldn’t even drive ! I’m telling my therapist about you in the morning lol.

Ur in it! Here we are!<br><3 sending u luv bb

Ur in it! Here we are!
<3 sending u luv bb


i feel like i have depersonalization because i always feel spaced out (like by spaced out i mean life doesnt feel real at all and i feel like that started at around at least winter of 2019 i think probably earlier) but i maybe have had an “episode” like once


Try somatic experiencing! It completely changed the way I think about mental health


i feel like i’m dreaming quite a lot, it happens for like a week or two every few months hmm


I just sit in my room all day now... doing nothing. It’s like the whole year is in a dream, especially not being able to see people much  oh wellll


i have struggled with dissociation and some derealization, but very rarely does is go as far depersonalization. i felt that it had gotten better, but then march hit, and now i feel like i am constantly in a daze because my brain says "this is so god damn weird we have to be dreaming." i also moved house for the first time in ELEVEN YEARS around april, so being in this new setting practically the entire time is definitely not helping! feeling like i can't experience that rare good to it's full extent is making it hard to feel like there is any good, so i am making a journal about all of the good things that happen every day. it has actually helped a lot with gratitude and kicking depression's ass on those particularly bad days, and helped with the memory issues that being derealized can give you. anyway, long comment, no one will read it, but i just felt i should say something so there's one more person adding to this community of people who think they are dreaming, or in the passenger seat, or.. however you may like to describe it. you're not alone!


can depersonalization happen only sometimes instead of always? like it happens often but it isn’t always there.


i highly recommend trying dialectic behavioral therapy for anyone suffering with complex trauma

@Rose Lalonde good luck!! it’s typically taught best in a group therapy setting. hopefully you can find a socially distanced group covered by your insurance! best of luck with your recovery 💛

I will talk to my therapist about it! Thank you!


I'm glad I'm not the only one who uses logic plugin references to explain mental health - for years I've said antidepressants are like a compressor lmao


If anyone's interested, i have DPDR and was treated with EMDR and had a whole year of relief from the cloud, I'm back to fog again but i have hope and i know it can be better again!


does the humming in the beginning sound like when to anyone else?

also "take what you can get" is basically a line from when lol
maybe I'm just going insane and she's not actually giving us lyric hints (in addition to an album title lol)


okay we definitely need to compile a list of the hidden singing because it was in this video too, with "take what you can get" (5:58), and "so many things" (6:45)

U won’t find anything lol that’s just how I talk


Every day I'm just religiously waiting for your video, please don't stop posting 🥺


I have a quick question! If it’s kind of like a co-morbidity thing with anxiety, could it be helped with SSRI’s?

I was on ssris and for me it made me spacier bc it flattened out my emotions! But it’s definitely helped other peopl!


It happens too often for me. And always at the worst times.


My experience of dp is the more I search for answers the worse it gets, just let go !


damn dodie should go into maths with those graphs


not gonna lie, the chords this time sounded like into the unknown but a very specific part of it


quiet observer who heard you said the comments make you feel like community 💖


some people talk to me about disassociating as if it’s the same thing as derealization, and it’s kind of frustrating. the way they talk about disassociating makes me jealous that they can just choose when to zone out and then wake up again. some people say derealization sounds relaxing and calming but it’s obnoxious and aggravating, it just makes me want to destroy everything around me so that i know everything around me is real.

Lolol I know that feeling
Makes me angry whenever anyone uses dissociate as a joke too
But also I’m like whatever. People do dissociate often. Some can choose but some also really can’t. It’s all a struggle. Sucks that we feel trapped tho I so so so get it


Dodie u reminded me of the song Stuck from The Groundhog Day Musical. I think it would give you a laugh. Or maybe a cry? I’m not sure but I find it relatable


Me, myself and I with DID:<br>only present in my life is present simple

Me, myself and I with DID:
only present in my life is present simple

Also I remember the worst depersonalization moment: I found myself shaking and twitching on a bench not understanding who am I and why an I here


love the Minnie riperton riff (also she’s maya Rudolph’s mom!?!?)


I am here for Minnie Ripperton impressions and producer dodie's logic/depersonalisation analogies


"it's okay. it's okay, because it has to be" re-fucking-tweet


I used to get depersonalisation badly from weed


“oOoOOhhH~ two weeks? This will be a nice break!”

now it’s October 15th 4:00pm 2020. wHy dO I sUdDeNLy rEgReT lIfE


Play with your band all 6 feet apart in a tent outside.


CASI NO ENTENDI NADA PERO ESPERO QUE TE MEJORES Y RECUERDA SIGUE ´PERRON


The captions came up before she started talking and for a second I thought the whole video was going to be interpretive dance

hahaha omg i went back to the beginning and youre so right. im pissing myself laughing <3


i feel like one day I'm gonna wake up and it'll me March again and it scares me


I started getting kind of worried earlier because I hadnt seen a new video notification yet


updated list of the clues we have so far + link to comprehensive video made by Getsome tidiness:

1.    _ _ _ _ _  A  _ _ _ B _ _ _

2. and then somewhere in either of the words is:    _ _ B _ _

3. somewhere is:      u _ _

4. at the start of one of the words is:     P _

5. at the end of one of the words is:    _D

6. somewhere is _ E _

7. at the end of a word and after the letter "E" is:   (E)M

8. Somewhere is: _ O (then some letter with an up and down line on the side- cant tell what letter though)

9. between probably "B" and "E" is:  L
:)

link to a comprehensive video made by getsome tidiness: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yzj7icEdvc


I got a tattoo that reminde me that I am here because I disociate do much 😅


I was waiting for you to say here are the highs and lows of highschool football


Is it like that moment where everything starts to feel wayyyy too real or sometimes not real at all and then your body is just: I d o n t l i k e t h i s


Oops i dissociated during the video about dissociation 😅


Just taking a guess here buuuut, I think the letters will spell out the album title and in each video I reckon dodie mentioned a song title or something relating to one of the songs on the album in each video??? Maybeee???


does anyone know where her jumper is from? 🥰


it really lookes like theres a depressed teen sitting w their leg out in the sofa uh


Who else is trying to crack the code at the end of the videos? (:


are you hiding another song in your videos again or am I tripping


Why do I know that song she sang for a quick moment at the end


<b>ive never been early to a dodie vid before—</b>

*ive never been early to a dodie vid before—*


visit some parts of the US.  It's been 'over' since April.


Lovin youuuuuu is easy cuz you beautifullllll


sorry i know this video is important but every time she said the highs and lows i could not stop thinking abt archie from riverdale saying ‘the highs and lows of high school football’


Alright, hangman dodie.... I have A, L, O and i think i saw a B once... Anything..?


Have you tried Jordan Hardgrave’s course


Does any else have Alice in wonderland syndrome?


whats the song dodie sings at the end just a little bit bc its stuck in my HEAD but i can not place my finger on it


desperately searching the comments for my other spacey pals


the ending where she sings that song (la la la la) wtf is it I'm so stuck!!!! I know it but I can't remember what it is send helppppp


What made you suddenly decide to start uploading so much?


this is not going to last forever and that's kinda comforting but still sucks. It feels like nothing is happening and I'm not part of anything, I'm just passing the days. Some days are actually fine but today isn't one of those days :(


i don’t know what i have, but nothing is life is good. never. it’s kinda like u said, the goodness bar just went down. it’s hard. but u know i think? i’m sorry


why did u sing "so many things" I CANNOT HANDLE ANOTHER HIDDEN SONG AOIDNOVIAV


brb just need to listen to orla’s new song


can someone tell me the name of the song she was humming??


Hmm u dont do snappy clap clap anymore for the intros :o


The reason we are all feeling this way he's because the AI Consciousness is dying and we are shifting to a better world! We're we will all feel better than we ever have been before Hold the Line everyone We got this the war is ending praise The God's SKÅL


I think I might of used to have this but I’m not sure,


you look like the girl from the show pure


hums are from . (full stop) or air so sweet? i think


Libérez Vérités, Hypothèses et Solutions


thank you so!! much!! for raising awareness of this!! ive almost always felt like i’m not in reality, and i never realized what it was, it means everything that you provide some insight


I've tried explaining this to people and you've summed it up perfectly. Thank you


Your videos about this always make me feel so safe. I have the same condition, and it’s so comforting knowing someone else goes through this.


You saved my life dodie. I can’t thank you enough 💕


I love how you are so open about these things :) thank you


you explained disassociation so well it made me have ✨flashbacks✨


I've been waiting for this. I haven't even watched this video and I already agree that depersonalisation and derealisation is worse in COVID times 😔


Lovely video, I’ve suffered from derealizarion before in my life, so I understand the feeling.


i really appreciate how much u tackle explaining mental health and your personal experiences, thank you so much. i still go back to your book when i'm feeling lost


love the mental health awareness nd love uuuu 🥰✨🥰


I LOVE YOUUUU 🥺u helped me a lot with this

like u make it less scary bc ik im not alone 👉👈


First also I love you so so much and all of your music. You’ve changed my life for the better dodie!


🤭how did she know i was struggling with this


also i really like the hums! some very nice a major today.

or e, i guess. however you want to look at it!


Ooh the hums in the beginning were super pretty


hello yes !! also ily n i hope you're doing at least ok! <3 :)


Alright, for the hints so far, it's U_B_D A P_OBLEM I think. Anyone have any ideas of what the first word might be? I think that the last word is problem

It can also be UNBID a problem (though, BUILD is the most probable answer)

I think the general consensus is that it's Build A Problem


I thought you're not going to upload! I was so worried


This is the latest I have been to one of these


7:11:
lalalalala
doodeedoodeedoo

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

7:11:
lalalalala
doodeedoodeedoo

*_REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE_*


"Only June" JNFJNKFSJ that's it, exactly.


personal notes:

_ U _ _ D      A      P _ O B L E M

7 letters: P _ O B L E M

problem

 (I'm 99% sure it's problem...)

5 letters: _ U _ _ D

ruled

build

cured

guard

lured

outed

tuned

Current top guess:

build a problem

 (a second B)

she's fully just singing lyrics in each video too, don't know where the initial hums for today's vids are from tho... Agree with a different commenter's idea about them being harmonies for different songs!

OH IDEA- the beginning humms are the order that the songs in the album will be in?? so like the kiss me one would be song number 8 on the album!!!


Lmao doesn’t ket literally give u hardcore depersonalisation
I think I’d lose my fukin mind so
I’m gd


Your not in the matrix most people are actually


Thanks a whole lot for talking about this.<br>I’ve had what seems like a chronic disassociation since the age of 12, it’s kind of odd to think about recovery because I sincerely can’t remember what reality felt like. This kind of content reminds me to try again, being able to take life seriously without constant reminder that what you will do will have consequences is a great blessing most people take for granted.

Thanks a whole lot for talking about this.
I’ve had what seems like a chronic disassociation since the age of 12, it’s kind of odd to think about recovery because I sincerely can’t remember what reality felt like. This kind of content reminds me to try again, being able to take life seriously without constant reminder that what you will do will have consequences is a great blessing most people take for granted.


Hehe i can see the porg in the background


This is too relatable, I've never been officially diagnosed but I've felt all the symptoms of derealization for about 3 or 4 years now. It does often trigger panic attacks for me because I realize that I might never be able to feel normal again, and that scares me more than anything in the world. I've learnt to live with it as well, but I always feel like everybody else is experiencing life in a better, clearer way than me, if that makes sense. Thank you for making this video, it really does hit home, and for what it's worth, I'm glad I'm not alone.


it’s made me lose my memory i hate this shit


Man I wonder what the word is....                     .                                               .P _ O B L E M


26 seconds and there is already a comment


Сохибжамол Солиева


STOP GIVING US LETTERS TO WORD WE ALREADY KNOWWWWW !!!!! we wanna see the first word!!


Hi Boys 😍💋 💝💖♥❤

Hi Boys 😍💋 💝💖♥❤

Роман Брюхачёв


You were the first comment, how does that feel?


dpdr sucks. my dpdr has gotten so much worse since covid and it just sucks.