My mother always say "At the end of the day, no one can help you. Just choose happiness" She says that so easily but i feel so stuck... If there is a way to "choose happiness" then i would've done it right? Till this day, my mother still refuses to bring me to therapists cause she think its a waste of money and time...


I'm like you, over-feeling every little things, and I'm so happy I am cause I can get so freaking happy. I'm an eternal optimistic, and even with depersonalization and derealization, I kept this spirit. My therapist was like "You could go depressed", my friends were like "Could you become depressed" and I was like "No way. I'm way too much aware of all the amazing things in life, I could never get depressed".
Well guess what you lovely sunny me ? It's been a week, and it's becoming harder and harder to remember how to be happy. Nothing makes you smile, nothing make you motivate. You have this really important exam tomorrow, and you just can't focus on studying, because everything is blurry, fuzzy, everything seems worthless and dreamy. And you're supposed to know 24 analysis by heart, and right now you can't even remember what I ate yesterday. Took you five minutes, but now you know: you ate mushroom, pepper and something else. Yep lovely sunny me, I love you but you where wrong.
I know I will be okay, I know it. I know I can still have ten minutes where I'm suddenly alright, smiling and laughing.
But right now, even writing this comments is costing me, and looking at you Dodie, just felt so relatable.
I think I can pull myself back, and try to avoid to fall this deep, I think I can make it, I just have to seek for help right now and get back on my feet. But thank you so much, because seeing you talk about it felt so right, so heartwarming, and make me feel so less alone.
Thank you


2:13 oh my god. I never imagined that anyone else experienced it the same way I did. Thank you


faszinating how talkative and entertaining and active you are, when you're depressed. I am not. I am then just a piece of flesh with fatty hair, stinky clothes, pimples, almost no mimic and talking even less than I usually do as an introvert.


I know this must be so hard, so thank you for pushing through it and sharing with the world. There needs to be so much more awareness and educating done on mental illness. A simple "cheer up" from friends and family is not gonna cut it (however well meant it is). So thanks for being so open and elaborate with the experience.


Yep...this is honestly me...every damn day...but I never have the feeling of getting better...


The worst feeling is when you survived on a sucidal stage, and aftr a year its all coming back, but this time youre stronger and you dont wanna die anymore, so you just watch ur life being wrecked and doing nothing..🤦♂🤦♂🤦♂


that lil clap clap nice to meet you i'm depressed intro was the greatest thing. i wish i was this sweet while depressed


Hi dodie just wanted to say how much I appreciate your videos. I am going through something similar and it is horrible. What strikes me looking at Utube is  how we are all creative intelligent people the best kind of people look how creative our brains are to get us to this state! But just wanted to say thanks I look at you and think we could be friends so many people are so boring shouldn't be so judgemental but you may agree?


I don't know why but every time I'm depressed I come back to this video. It's kind of comforting in a weird way. I've watched it so many times I lost count of it but every time it's kind of new and like I never watched it. It's weird. But I love it so much. You helped me so much with just a simple video of you sitting on the floor, eating and ranting about depression. so... Thanks


Don’t think I could relate to anything more in this world than this 🙃


watching this after listening to Before the Line for the sixth time today and crying :)


Every tunnel ends in light. Those are the words responsible for me still being here today.


i started crying while you were talking because i physically felt it in my chest because i know the feelings fuck


This... Wow. Um. I've been trying to put stuff into words for quite a while now. I feel a lot of this, quite a lot. I'm tired so often, pretty much every day, and it weighs down on me like my body is a thousand times heavier then normal. And the stuff you said about not feeling things... I get it. I get that too. The good news is that I'm getting counselling and I have a blood test on Monday. The bad news is that there's a 2 month waiting list for counselling.

I don't want to say I have depression. Once, I was feeling really bad and empty and heavy and I muttered to myself "is this what depression feels like?" And my friend heard and said, "no, it's much, much worse." That happened twice. I have a group chat with two friends, and I was feeling so bad and no one was online so I just started sending messages talking about how I was feeling. For an hour. then someone came online and we talked and she was supportive and wonderful, but I didn't hear anything from the other girl. She came online the next day and I asked her to go read the messages. She'd read them. She hasn't said anything.

I miss the days where I was happy most of the time. I miss the days when I didn't have to worry about not enjoying the things I love. I miss them and I don't know if I'll ever get them back.

But I have to believe that there will be a day where I say I'm okay and mean it.

Thank you, Dodie.


every time I fall back into the dark and scary rabbit hole that my depression is, I come back to this video (mostly unintentionally) and I feel just a little bit less alone. It is kinda calming… I know that might be weird. I’m glad that Dodie decided to share this and decided to keep it online. What always gets me is this; “I just feel this constant longing for something and I’m not getting it. Suddenly nothing is easy, everything seems terrifying and difficult and complex and messy and heavy, like nothing is going to be okay ever again.” Those are the words I struggle and fail to say, the things I can’t express when my mind is just this numb, grey ball of confusion. I hate my depression. Either I feel nothing at all or I feel scared, because of the lack of emotions or my own disinterest in keeping myself functioning. <br>I wrote down all the feelings I felt in the last few days (anxiety, sadness, anger, apathy and despair) and tried to find the reason for why I’m feeling what I feel. Makes it me feel better? No, but it keeps me busy.

every time I fall back into the dark and scary rabbit hole that my depression is, I come back to this video (mostly unintentionally) and I feel just a little bit less alone. It is kinda calming… I know that might be weird. I’m glad that Dodie decided to share this and decided to keep it online. What always gets me is this; “I just feel this constant longing for something and I’m not getting it. Suddenly nothing is easy, everything seems terrifying and difficult and complex and messy and heavy, like nothing is going to be okay ever again.” Those are the words I struggle and fail to say, the things I can’t express when my mind is just this numb, grey ball of confusion. I hate my depression. Either I feel nothing at all or I feel scared, because of the lack of emotions or my own disinterest in keeping myself functioning.
I wrote down all the feelings I felt in the last few days (anxiety, sadness, anger, apathy and despair) and tried to find the reason for why I’m feeling what I feel. Makes it me feel better? No, but it keeps me busy.


This was recommended to me rn when I'm depressed today thank you for this


I just love the way you talk about this depressed time you expierence. I feel the same way! I feel like I have been drinking :| literally... unreal and not right. Yea.... i must go to sleep now. Bay, peace!


It's like she put my thoughts into words


When im depressed i also feel like im dreaming and unmotivated and i feel like reality is gone and im just stuck in a state where i feel dizzy and emotional and i cant get anything done, unfortunately this happens alot and idk how to help it


I'm sorry you're feeling down, but I just want to thank you for sharing this raw moment in your life. I feel everything you've ever felt and it's nice knowing I'm not the only one with these thoughts and feelings.


I feel like it's possible that I have the depersonalization thing, but I'm not really sure. I just really relate to what you're describing, that fear that you're never going to see the world the same and all the feelings and experiences are just going to be filled with nothingness. I could just be disassociating a lot as a side effect from my dysthymia but idk. It's so difficult to speak or express myself when I get like that and I don't want to make people feel like I've given up trying to talk and connect with them


I feel empty and feel like I'm living in a dream and not waking up


3:54 - 4:40 i started crying because this is me for the past few weeks


I just, seeing real people with real problems is so helpful. Because I'm sitting in a room, surrounded by a mess, not knowing what's going to happen next. There's just so much that has gone wrong, that can go wrong, and it's terrifying. Last night there was an event, I won't go into detail, but pretty much everyone validated everything I've been feeling entirely inadvertantly, and there's that ache, and I didn't know where to go.
So I put on a dress.
And I put on your videos. And it feels okay


how can you speak so openly about your depression?

rory armstrong The reason why some people are scared to talk about it is that culture avoids it. If you grow up with a family that is open about it it's easier.

I see it as an outlet. I can see making a video as a beautifully cathartic, mind-easing process. Not sure if this was sarcasm or genuine want-to-know curiosity. But that's how I view it.

Well, personally I feel like if someone's been depressed for so long to be okay with it, to come to terms with it, and to detach yourself from the illness, talking about it actually makes you feel better. For me, talking about it like it's a normal thing that people go through (because it IS; a lot of people go through it) makes it all seem less heavy and a wee bit more hopeful.

It's also kind of like talking to yourself in front of a camera about your depression

Making videos help her, just like many other youtubers. Her fandom is really sweet and kind so she can feel ok talking about it, she knows she wont be judged by them and maybe she will be related to. That's how you speak openly about your depression.

rory armstrong ikr its such a personal thing for me

Therapy might help her be more open since she has discussed all of this with someone else and has a clear understanding of what she is going through and wants to help us know we are not alone.

that's awful of you to say. Maybe she does make money off of it, it doesn't take away from the fact that she's helping others and making others feel like they're not alone. Doctors get paid, but they help people live. Therapist get paid, but they help others get control of their mental illness. Dodie gets paid, because she is a role model and mentor, she brings people joy with her music, kindness, and ability to share painful emotions, to help others.

There are some people I can speak to, but others are like: "you're not depressed, you're just a bit upset", "you don't have anxiety, you're just shy/scared", "you don't have depersonalisation, you just spend too much time on the laptop"...not saying that everyone has to understand, but it just doesn't help.

She seems to do well with sharing and being open with us and others. Sadly I am at the other end and often find talking to be hard and like it won't help anything. I wish I was more open like her tbh.

Some people are better at expressing themselves than others.


My problem is that on one of these days, i sort of go into this hyper reactive or angry state with others just so i can cut them off. I really want to be alone but i cant seem to get that and i just end up hurting the people i love.

Ps. Im just a teenager who isn’t taken seriously by anyone in this South Asian household so... any advice?


Can relate on so Many levels, it's scary


I used to write on my walls so much that my parents painted the wall I write on with chalkboard paint lol


I have never heard anyone describe this so accurately


I LOVE THE "Wayo!" IM LAUGHING SO HARD😂😂 ily dodie!!


Never has my off days been so accurately portrayed...


Im giving s thumbs up...not because I like that you are depressed..but because You have seemed to put words to how I feel for past 5 years or more.

Big hugs and a bag of edamame and a clink of our tea mugs
Thank you for putting it all into words because Its been hard for me to explain....and the last time i wrote in a journal..it ended up being for 5 hours straight...and i ended up feeling worse cuz I started thinking of other times...
Some people have actually gotten mad at me for bringing up old stuff.. but i cant help it.
And i think well why am i apologizing.... obviously it still isnt resolved for me.. even if the other person is fine and has long moved on... and im doing circles around it trying to analize every bad situation....trying to figure out what happened. My usual conclusion...i made a bad decision...with good intentions..it seemed like a good idea at the time.... but unfortunately ..like those choose your own adventure books...i cannot go back to change anything. And I tell myself next time i will know better...

So sweet your mum brought u to water slides to cheer you up...
Mine has not been so sweet.
Its been more like tellin me to just get over it already...along with many along tge past few years.. which doesnt make me feel better.. but worse.. for not being able to.... or other people telling me.. happy is a choice.
But i dont choose to be depressed.
So i step back from people...mostly the people who make me feel worse aboit already feeling horrible.

I take my cat sized dog out.
He is quiet and sweet  and loves me unconditionally. And I think thats what I need... but dont have.

Anyway.. thank you for putting words to how im feeling too.
Some days are easier....but getting my little dog out for his walks..also gets me out.. whether i want to or not...but at the end of tge walk .. i feel a bit better...not always.. but
He needs to get out...and sometimes when Im upset...he paws at me... or licks my hand.
And reminds me it will be ok.....lets go for a walk. Walk it off in an attempt to shake it off.

AD didnt make things better for me ...much worse really. So those are a no go for me.. but hope they work for others.
Thyroid thing is there for me and I keep being told..once the levels are good.. you will feel better.

Im impatient... its now been years.
And i miss the old me.... shes in there somewhere. So some days are bad but Im not giving up....but i may just allow my self to chill here for a bit... then take me and my little furry friend  out for some much needed fresh air.

Thank you
Im glas to have found you and your songs and this video.
Cheers


I always come back to this video when I'm no happy


This made me laugh. I hope you're feeling better


Thanks for sharing this experience, Dodie. You have no idea how much these video's by you and people like you had helped me in realizing my experiences with depression are valid and real and incited me to seek therapy. You have a great community supporting you on your journey to better mental health and I am entirely behind you and your choices (medication or not). Speaking from my personal experience though, I've had a bit of luck with medication but only when I used it in combination with regular therapy sessions. Sending love and positive vibes your way.


You actually gave me a new insight! I think I am longing for something, but I do not know what that is! Thanks!
P.S. I know this comment may not make much sense, but OK.

Much love, bye!


thanks to you i bought some edamame and it’s pretty good


Dodie it’s been two years and I love you


sometimes i feel heavy, unmotivated and just like a sad blob. not sure if that’s depression but it happens a lot.


I watched this video a while ago and I shared it with a friend who has had depression since she was very young. At the time I was glad to find this because it made me feel like I could understand her better. And I think I did, in a more rational/logical way. Fast forward two years later and I find out I can actually understand how this feels, and gosh, it's hard but knowing it's something that happens to other people (and therefore not feeling crazy and alone) makes it all a bit better.

I can seriously feel the chemical part of my brian malfuctioning some days... which is something i'm sure I didn't undersatnd the first time I watches this. Thabk ypu for sharing.


When someone says depression doesn't exist I tell them how happy I am that they've never experienced it. Because I wish that state on no one.


this is how i am today and i feel like its never gonna end. but it will;


the phrase "yea I don't know" sometimes is the only way to describe a certain feeling


i just wish my mum would understand lmao. she always tells me how i feel is just "all in my head" and i'm like well yeah ??????? obviously ???????

it depends but honestly she is just explaining how it feels but there are ways to improve it. They are mechanisms that will make you improve.. your mom doesnt know cuz of the stigms that there is. But you can change it with the right brain excercises trust me.

theisabelmiller yes. I wish my Mam and sister would just get it


I’ve always tried looking for the words to explain it to my friends and family now i have those words


Just took some frozen fruits out of the freezer and putted in a bowl then microwaved it before I watched this video. I love this mug btw, need one piano mug!


looking back at this video, i used to hate saying i felt the same or resonated because it felt as if i was robbing the person who was sharing with me how they felt. now being professionally diagnosed with depression and anxiety, some days when i feel awful have no empathy for myself because even after finally being diagnosed it feels like this weird prank or lie in where i dont really have these things. as if im a fraud and am forcing myself to endure this for the sake of attention or i am offending people who are mentally ill.


I don't know if I have depression, but sometimes I feel so hopeless, my chest is heavy, and I feel darkness

I don't know.

Lilly Incookieble I have kind of been feeling the same for the past 2 days. So I have a best friend and she has another friend. But she maybe likes that friend more than me and what makes it worse is that I have been "fighting" (not like physically but we always like the same people and she has this weird tone in her voice when I speak to her.) for the past 4 years and she always wins. She is like a better version of me. Yesterday I cried about it for like 15 minutes and then I just went on with the day but I can't stop thinking about this thing. I wrote my best friend a message but she didn't see it yet. It's so complicated and I really want to talk to the girl I've been fighting with and just talk all about this but it would probably be really awk and I'm afraid I'll cry and she'll laugh at me. I am also a very sensible and slow person and whenever they tell me I'm doing something wrong I always cry. It's so fucking awful to smile when inside I'm feeling bad. I tell myself I am ridiculous and over-reacting and a crybaby and then it gets worse. My mind always wonders and it goes from one thought to another really fast. I just feel awful inside not even because I'm doing the thing wrong but because I'm a childish crybaby.

I feel kinda the same thing. Like ' Wow you're just another person. The world changes very slowly. So slow, you might not reco´gnise it. You're not the one who changes the world or discoveres something.' Or I'm just annoyed of how I deal with people or with how I look or how I talk or my decisions. But then I push it all away and focus on homework, friend, family, shool and happy things so yeah. <br>And most of the time I get out of that phase by telling myself 'You're only 15 you can't be depressed already. Stop thinking about it.' and it works.

I feel kinda the same thing. Like ' Wow you're just another person. The world changes very slowly. So slow, you might not reco´gnise it. You're not the one who changes the world or discoveres something.' Or I'm just annoyed of how I deal with people or with how I look or how I talk or my decisions. But then I push it all away and focus on homework, friend, family, shool and happy things so yeah.
And most of the time I get out of that phase by telling myself 'You're only 15 you can't be depressed already. Stop thinking about it.' and it works.

Sarah Last Name yes!! ^^ that is wonderful advice

i'm not sure if you have depression (i mean how could i be sure lol) but if these feelings persist regularly or get worse make sure to tell someone or look for some sort of, healthy, help because if you ignore constant feelings of depression for too long of a time (that's what i did) it likely will get worse. but you very easily could just be feeling a little down at this point in your life which is perfectly normal! so don't get too worried or anything. i hope you feel better <3


I remember watching this two years ago as a thirteen year old who thought she was going through something really tough.<br>And now I actually am depressed trash

I remember watching this two years ago as a thirteen year old who thought she was going through something really tough.
And now I actually am depressed trash


I always come back to this video when I’m depressed


Do you think there is a connection between the changeable nature of human moods akin to weather systems?


I was diagnosed with Major Depression Disorder (MDD or Clinical Depression) and I totally get what you're going through. I've been taking anti-depressants for the last two years and yeah, they've helped a lot because at the time, I was stuck in a severe depression and was afraid I would never be myself again.

Sometimes I have better days then others, some days I'm happy and positive but other days I'm insecure and hate myself for no good reason. And yes, this is depression. We have our good days and bad days.

I just want anyone to know that if you are suffering from depression/mental illness, you're not alone. I know at times it can be really hard and simple things may seem like the hardest things in the world but you have to keep pushing through it and remind yourself that what you're feeling at the moment isn't permanent. Be strong. It was really hard for me, being 14 at the time but I am now 16 and still going strong.

You are loved. Stay positive! ❤


Wow I feel this all the time didn't know it was depression tbh I didn't know what depression felt like


my depression has been bad for the past few months and i relate to every single thing you're saying. damn.


my depression got easier to live with since i dont fight against any emotion and put myself 1st and dont care bout someone not understanding me why I act the way I act


My brain feels so heavy and tight at the moment. Something is just broken in my brain.


You can put words to what I feel better than I can


I've just imagine you recording it, in a quiet place. the depression kicks in when you're too alone or too many person due to in need of attention. i dunno bruh, maybe eat something.. like a DONUT


watching this cuz today I’m depressed yayyy  how have I only just found this video

Edit: also, she’s eating edamame beans whilst I’m sat here w/ a fistful of Reece’s pieces, who is as healthy as her when they’re depressed 😂

-watching this cuz today I’m depressed yayyy-  how have I only just found this video

Edit: also, she’s eating edamame beans whilst I’m sat here w/ a fistful of Reece’s pieces, who is as healthy as her when they’re depressed 😂


This makes me wanna stand up and get some snap peas but I know that they wouldn’t taste as good as they look


I'm rewatching this video because I am also depressed and eatin edamame beanz. I always come back to this video. I love u


i’m struggling with the same thing. my videos have been about my journey & this video really helped me. 💕 if y’all wanna see stop by.


OMG THAAANKS!!  I have severe depression, anxiety and BPD, and watching you coping so well makes me feel hope, I guess I will not kill myself this week, thanks for  giving me a reason to wait a lil more days, maybe if I continue, therapy and medication will finaly help, don't know how to express how thankfull am I, can I send you a cute drawing? I don't even know in wich country you are, I don't even speak your language very well, but maybe one day day we met and I can buy you an icecream. Wanna be my new fp? (My BPD folks will relate ajjaja)


I relate to this, more than I kinda expected to? that's how it's like for me, I'm also extremely frustrated at myself. I get what you mean by the "working" and "nonworking" brain having no empathy for each other? it's a funny thing, but also sad. I too hate that it sucks the fun out of things and life is blurry and I feel as if I'm not properly living like I should be. what a waste! thank you for the relatable chat, remember you're not alone in this, similarly to how you make us feel (:


I've never found something so relatable :o


I relate to this video. Sometimes I can just have an absolutely shit day where my head doesn’t want to work and everyone around me is just like ‘cheer up! Don’t wallow in your sadness’ and I’m just like ‘I don’t want to do anything because I won’t get any feelings of it so I’ll just waste the day’ and it sucks when you’re 14 yk :/ oofffff


woah what you described is exactly how i feel sometimes


i never know when im depressed, if i ever actually been one

its frustrating not knowing where the root for all of your emotions are.

makes it harder to dissect it, probe at it, try to find a way around it.


I love this video. It helps me realise that I’m not the only one


This just sounds like growing up. Childhood is vivid, adulthood is... dull


its been 4 months and ive been feeling like this (even worse) every second...


Hmm im depressed everyday, its hard especially when you want to have fun but you cant.

Isaac Smith not reallt depress like i want to have fun but people are judging for my actions but thats fine, because im mean-

Isaac Smith your beautiful and it’s gonna be ok


4:51 I've been depressed today so i tried to take a bath and treat myself with candles, a bath bomb and lavender oil . That's exactly how i felt. Just hot, bored and empty.


aw I can relate ,keep fighting ,just dont  use drugs


When I’m depressed my chest feels heavy and my head feels empty, I can’t laugh or smile, or feel happy, but if there is something to be sad about, it consumes me and all I can do is cry. Usually I just lie and bed and be bored though.

And then people try to cheer you up and you’re like 😫😖😩

Those episodes can be anxiety or sadness, but don't confuse it with depression. Depression is way much more complex than feeling sadness for a moment. It's sucking up all the colour of life and leaving you empty. It's not like "Oh yeah yesterday I was so depressed"


Sometimes my logic of the day doesn't triumph over my current lack of motivation


3:55 omg i have literally the same problem and i struggle A LOT


I remember feeling absolutely hopeless. The sadness, the depression and the anxiety always came back, so why does the joy i feel now mean anything? I thought that feeling anything positive was pointless- id just be back down again in a little bit. (Spoiler alert, those thoughts brought me down quicker) I realized something though, sounds so obvious and insignificant, but this meant with a slight change of perspective, that the happiness comes back too.  When i feel happy, i let myself enjoy it. I give myself permission to have it while it lasts. When im sad, i let myself experience it. The happy will come back, and i will be okay, just not right now. Sometimes i still struggle with looking at it like that, but theres a small part of me thats constantly there, loving that i have experienced hope, and waiting so patiently for me to feel it again.

This was a little too soppy for my usual comments and not as well written as id like it to be but man its three in the morning and im really hungry so i think im actually gonna eat the cheetos i got earlier alright have a good whatever time youre in right now later 🌈


I'm the same way when I get this way with people. I usually sit there and stare at the floor or some shit like that till my best friend asks if I'm OK. He's the only one who ever notices.


depression isn't just tough, it is like you are worthless and can't get out of bed and face the world. other than physically being able to make a cuppa or turn over in your bed, I'm ashamed to say I haven't showered for weeks when I'm in a depressive episode. I have derealisation and I am constantly in a state of daydreaming and people laugh and say I have my head in the clouds. but I don't want my head in the clouds, thanks for making this video dodie xoxo


The worst for me is when I can physically feel the bad mood. My chest gets all tight and painful, while my head feels totally empty. As you said, I have nothing. No emotions, good or bad. Just boredom and numbness and an achy chest that I can't seem to get rid of.


Everything feels numb... I feel that. And the “everything is not going to be ok” I understand how that feels. I’m glad you understand that the happy you will soon come back❤❤


I always find myself coming back to this video


I’m writing my research paper on depression so I came back to this video


After going to countless therapy sessions, my therapist has concluded that I have depression and anxiety as well as body dysmorphia and maybe others. And honestly, after so many nights of sobbing in my bedroom, Dodie's videos are the only thing that keep me from committing suicide.

thank you like i said right now i feel like i could use someone to talk too right now.

Yay! I hope I can try to be that person who helps you get through the hard times! You are SO IMPORTANT and I hope you know that!

Eliza Hamilton please stay alive for my dog, he likes to meet people in the street

Duck Puppet curious, what worked best for you?

stay strong, you're loved by a universe of those who understand you

hey thanks i sent you a message :) on your channel :)

No problem! If any of you ever need someone to talk to feel free to talk to me! We can talk back and forth here or you can pop over to my channel and comment there (you don't need to subscribe or anything) I am glad I am making you feel better!

thank you what you are saying makes me feel a bit better right now :)

Both of you and anyone else who needs it! I have also gone through hard times in my life and Now that I am feeling better I want to try to help as many people as I can! You are both AMAZING PEOPLE!!

Please don't! You are an amazing person who deserves to live! You are SO MUCH more then you think and I want to help you in any way that I can! Things will get better and you CAN get though this! You might not think you can, but you can! Take life slow, one day at a time, and you will get though this!

sad thing is for the record someone once told me they would smile and grin and i actually died. only because i asked him if he would even care if i died while he was so sad for a youtuber who died. and apparently i am supposed to just ignore that type of comment. even though no one will ever say they would care if i died.

if i told you i felt the same way appart from the only thing keeping me from you know what is dodies videos would you actually care.

what. are you serious...its ironic because for me videos made by people like this are a reason i feel upset.

Eliza Hamilton hello fellow Hamilton fan. Please don't kill your self. That would be really sad

Eliza Hamilton things will get better bbs, just keep breathing 💕


I don’t even have to watch this video to say that this is my solid mood-


You have the best attitude towards this feeling. You explain that you will feel it, you’re supposed to feel it, you’re supposed to be depressed, and that you’re not gonna fight it and just let it be the damn devil it is :) lol love u


i dont even have a happy self except when im on drugs lol. thats me like 90% of the time


I just had one of this day. Generally I am a strong person and overpass everything but today was just..... messy and I was a wreck. You who read this might not belive me but just writing this brought me a bit of relief☺.


Is actually what I feel. Really need to go to doctors.


This is literally me all the time...

... that's probably bad


You can see the tears running down her face☹


This came out on my birthday last year. Yup. I'm glad that I found this.


note to anyone who doesn't have depression: you can't cheer a person in a depressive episode up. don't try, it just looks sadder than it is.


Everytime i feel depressed i watch this video


FEEEEEL THIS SO HARD. So hard to even try and look up when your alone ALLLLL THE TIME.  Need some friends. "Like someone sucked out the fun"


Well at least you're positive about it. Heh

Also I am eating frozen vagitables rn. They make me happy. I'm not very happy anyways but you make me happy because you're so positive and cheerfully.


<b>My problem is i feel like this every single day</b>

*My problem is i feel like this every single day*


There is nothing more beautiful than a woman who is in her "at home" look


I finally found the perfect and most vivid definition of depression. You are amazing, cheer up buttercup!


I just rewatched this and I can’t believe I never noticed the « not my chair not my problem » now that’s a THROWBACK


This video is so relatable thank you so much


It's crazy to me that people can be depressed a certain day, I've never experienced that. Depression for me is a constant thing, I don't have breaks, it doesn't choose days.

I had a relapse this last month like 6 different days within the month?? Randomly. It is weird as you say. Because it is not constant so you have no idea if you should diagnose it as depression


Im so glad someone was able to put it into words


That is the healthiest depression snack I’ve ever seen.


My SSRI meds have helped me a lot but they gave me some bad affects at to high of a dose (I think 75 mg)


this is how my depression works too, with the brain feels different thing


My ex never understood what being depressed was like. He used to get mad at me and yell whenever I told him I’m depressed.


It's how my anxiety is. It's always there but I'm not anxious all the time


I wrote to my happy self and its basically like 2 different people. Funny thing is, happy me doesnt ever have the idea of writing to sad me.


I also make snacks aggressively when im in a low mood like just slightly slamming things onto the counter comes naturally and then I feel guilty afterwards and cue the self hatred


what a perfect timing, I'm also feeling down today so i feels good to know that I'm not alone

btw i didnt said i was depressed cause i understand that depression is something way more complicated than just sadness


I feel the same exact way except I am not able to eat when I'm depressed 😭😭


i’m not sure what it is about eating fruit or veggies when it’s bad brain time but it’s so therapeutic. like hey i cannot do anything about my state right now but let’s eat some fruit shall we


Honestly same, sometimes sleeping and laying in bed makes time go faster


You're eating healthy, when I'm feeling that way (I'm here right now because I'm feeling that way so I looked up whether I'm depressed because I'm worried about myself) I down an entire bag of Trader Joes' apple sticks in a few minutes.

Also I would love to mindlessly watch videos on youtube, but I have work to do. I just feel really unmotivated and I had a large biology project due last week that I haven't even started.


“That’s why I get so hung up on the past. Because I felt it then but I don’t feel it now so I just want to go back to when I can feel again.” Never thought about it that way before, damn.


I feel ya.. My head feels stuck like... Its not working or dunno.. I started meds a week ago so i hope those will help somehow soon. Good luck with living!..


Your depression is different to my depression!
I have weeks were I go untouched by my depression then it hits me a brick wall!
My depression is sort of a I'm gunna die, I want to die, no one likes me, no one will care if I'm gone sort of thing... and then I cry and cry and cry...
Just food for thought

Unnamed I'm the exact same way and I always get so scared that it's not actually depression and I keep getting told by people that it's not for the sole fact that mine works where there's nothing for a few hours or days or a week, then it hits me like a fucking truck out of absolutely nowhere. People just push it off as me being sad or something, but people who have ever felt the two, know the difference.

Just because i broke a promise and it leads to depression

You as same as me, but the lastest depression that i got this morning (timezone) was weird, cause in the morning before i went out the class, my friend asked me gave her my paper work (she's not mean, she's nice), she wanted to copy because last extra class, she wasn't there. So in the evening, i forgot, i took a nap until 5:00pm (that's when my extra class start) and yeah, my dad told me to relax at home (we're late). So i took a bath, text my friend to appologise her and until 6:00pm, my depression hit me like you did something really bad, you lost her trust, you liar,...
So I *cough" hurt myself. I have my mood back after play game with friends in the second extra class but it doesn't go away.
(Sorry, it's too long)

Unnamed yes! There's different kinds of depression

Unnamed this happens to me too. It hits me in phases instead of on a daily basis. Where I will just feel completely numb to everything and not feel joy for a few weeks and then go back to being happy.

Tbh that sounds like Major Depressive Disorder. You can talk to your regular doctor about that, or see a specialist if thats within your means/what you prefer. Definitely tell someone (ANYONE) when you're in that place.

[I'm not a doctor, but I have a bachelors degree in psychology.]

Unnamed mine was always a mixture of that kind and Dodie's. Sometimes I get relapses and usually when I do they're more like Dodie's depression but back when I was in the thick of it it was mostly like your depression. It gets better ok I hope you know that.

urbestfriendrin that's not what an existential crisis is..

Unnamed that's called a extastenchal crises

OhMyLucia this is my exact thoughts daily. Just constant worry and panic that no one likes me and I'm nobody's friend I'm just. There

That is exactly what happens to me. It's like all of my insecurities come out and I start to think the same questions again and again like "Do my friends actually like me? Will I lose them for being such a mess? Why am I like this? Does eveyone think I'm lame? I can't even make a proper dinner I'm gonna fail in life" and I just feel very lonely and cry a lot

that's how I felt for the last few years, and then one day I woke up and felt like a completely different person, I felt like an empty shell. I'd much rather feel the pain I used to, and actually cry rather than feel how I feel now :/

On another note: I would care if you were gone!

Same. I just cry and cry and cry until my head feels like it's going to explode from all the negative thoughts

I'll care if you're gone.. it's horrible to think that someone gives their life away

+Nour Al Rifaie does it bother anyone else that someone else has your name...

I'm a guy btw just showing that mental health affects men too! The stigma man up need to go

Unnamed omg same literally most of the time I'll be fine and then suddenly everyyyyy intense depressing feeling is pushed together at once

twentyonephanics the stOMACH IN MY BRAIN

Unnamed yep. Then I have to go and continue my day like I'm not actually dying inside


Pets help depression.  Trying to laugh as much as you can. Comedies with family. Looking up your family tree history, doing things that are a part of your heritage, ancestry...like making a recipes your ancestors probably made. Counting your blessings. Thinking stuff like, "Well, at least I have two feet. Some people only have one or none." helps. & Music helps, too. This is my list that cheers me up, toughens me up. I'm actually learning to walk again after a car accident has had me down for months. So, I listen to this while I practice. @t  ....& There's these you tube nature sound videos with a lot of birds singing, those help cheer me up. Getting out to where there's lots of trees and birds, less people. Here's life lines: @t


Ugh god some days I just don’t want to do anything but everything and I just wanna cry but there are no tears and I feel hopeless and afraid I’ll never be loved or happy again, but this video let’s me know I’m never alone, and so do you. I love you and thank you for all you do and continue to do.


I literally related to everything you said in this video haha


Thank You for this vid. I'm feeling unmovable today..


lol when i get depressed i just sit. eat. and then contemplate life. then i tell myself how bad of a person i am. how everyone is perfect except me. then, the next day, i look into the mirror. i look into the mirror and i let them free. i let all the tears i had been holding in the day before roll down my face. crying into the sink with my head held down low in disappointment in myself because i am not perfect. then, when i am ready, i look up at myself and think; "you are not perfect. that is who you are. you are awesome, and you are you. in the end, that all you get. so cherish it. you are amazing and while everyone else is busy being perfect, you will be busy being your awesome, kind self." then i do the most amzing thing. i smile. i say to myself; "she is beautiful. she is me."

Baconater 28  I will try that the next time I get depressed

Baconater 28   But im not awesome, i am fat, fat and nothing else.

This is really beautiful but I would just like to remind you that other people are not perfect. I know how easy it can be for us to forget that the things we feel and the problems we go through, those around us go through them too. They just hide it. Just like we hide our problems from them, afraid of being judged, afraid of what they may think. I would just like for you to remember that you are really not alone. The people around you might not be going through the same stuff as you are but they have their issues too. The people who you consider perfect are probably also thinking ‘oh I’m so awful and I’m a terrible person and everyone hates me and  I wish I was like her’. Get what I mean?? While you’re thinking about how everyone else is so much better than you I can guarantee you that lots of them are thinking about how everyone else is so much better than them.

i've never related more. sometimes im like "am i depressed or am i just sad today?" but i do have depression. No matter how "happy" i am one day that sadness will still always be there


I feel like I’m having energy drained out of me by every situation and even thoughts about doing simple things exhaust me. Without having the Energy to do anything, I feel worthless and weak and that’s the cycle I have to break out of somehow. Kratom helped with energy and anxiety but I don’t want to be dependent upon anything forever. I want to naturally feel stable.


Watching this while I've spent the hole day in bed cuz I was to pathetic to get dressed or leave... CAN REALTE.


My working mind and my not working mind are completely different and have no empathy for each other .....wow , that hit my soul


Sometimes you just wake up and feel like poo because that's what your brain has decided to do

+Alex Lester (Alex) Damn, for how long have you been grounded?

Shloka Frank that's exactly what I was thinking when she began that statement :)

Shloka Frank literally me two days ago. I've been pushing it away and everyone around me, including YHIS VIDEO is just showing me signs that I really need to just let myself be. The problem is with my current circumstances in being grounded that isn't possible and anything try to do while grounded just isn't enough, I feel like I just need a day to be able to do what I want my way how I used to before I got grounded, because without that routine, my life is a stressful mess and it's affecting my depression a LOT. Literally just I'm not able to any,ore. And everyone is telling me I need to just listen to my emotions and IM NOT LETTING MYSELF AND NEITHER ARE MY PARENTS

Joëlle Weetjewel I was waiting for someone to comment that

Shloka Frank omg i was thinking of that too

Spooky Scary Skeletons there's nothing to be sorry about 🤗

Shloka Frank oh, i havent listened to down yet sorry

Spooky Scary Skeletons that's actually what dodie said in one of her video's (down)

Shloka Frank you should make that a song


I almost always feel unmotivated to do anything so I guess I'm either really lazy or depressed cause I'm kinda feeling down


Ohhhhhhh dodie I’m sorry that you are depressed ❤❤


I wanna get <br>“Nice to meet you, I’m depressed” and then a semicolon under it tattooed on my arm

I wanna get
“Nice to meet you, I’m depressed” and then a semicolon under it tattooed on my arm


Dear Dodie,
I've suffered with mental illnesses my entire life. When I was five years old I started to experience auditory and visual hallucinations that haunted me even in my dreams. As I grew, my symptoms became worse. I started to feel outside of my body, watching my life slip past me-Food tasted gray, the world seemed dull and out of focus, words became white noise. My depression festered in my chest to where I physically felt a whole there, something that couldn't be filled. I didn't tell anyone for years, tried to keep it inside and not burden anyone with it, but when I started self harming at the age of ten, I finally told my grandparents and they got me help almost immediately.
I was in and out of hospitals for years, constantly having scans of my brain and needles poking into my skin. I became a "mystery case" to most of the doctors that worked with me. I felt so alone. I had no friends (Besides my best friend who had stayed with me since the age of eight) because no one wanted to deal with my constant depression and anxiety. My family, excluding my grandparents and mother, weren't much of a help; most of them were addicted to dangerous drugs and alcohol and fought with each other constantly. Books and writing were my only companions. I found solace within the words written between the pages, and the words that I wrote down on paper.
Doctors were keen on figuring me out, diagnosing me with one thing after another until eventually there was a big stamp on my file that read, Mentally Disabled. For the next five and a half years, I was given almost every medication they could possible give me. When I was close to my sixteenth birthday they were nearly out of options. They told my grandma that eventually treating me would be pointless. And then they put me on a medication that changed my life.
It took about a month, but suddenly the world cleared. I was in the car with my grandma, passing old country roads that I had seen thousands of times before, and out of nowhere, I could see. The houses were colorful and the sun blinded me with it's brightness and the grass looked so green. I began to sob uncontrollably. I could see and I could feel my own skin and I was in my body, a REAL person living in a REAL world. After that, the whole in my chest began to feel with real laughter and happiness and colors. It was magical.
Sixteen years after living with bipolar disorder, psychosis, anxiety, PTSD, ADHD, and OCD, I was a real person. I've written two novels and I'm currently getting them published, I have a girlfriend of whom I'm falling hopelessly in love with, my best friend is still my best friend and soul mate, and although my life is chaotic and weird, I'm happy.
The reason for this message is to tell you that it DOES get better. It might take a while to find the right medication or to find what helps you the most, but Dodie, I promise it gets better. Don't give up. Keep your friends and family close, and never feel bad for your illnesses. You are a beautiful, wonderful person and you deserve happiness.
Love,
The girl who believes in you.


I seen this video, now I don’t feel so alone.


Hey I get nostalgic bc of my depression sometimes too 👍


"...al...right? Let's get you a blood test??"<br>I didn't know this was a generic response but they told me the exact same thing omg

"...al...right? Let's get you a blood test??"
I didn't know this was a generic response but they told me the exact same thing omg


when i’m depressed i cant leave my bed or shower for many days.


i am insanely lucky to say that i don't struggle with depression or anxiety or any of that, and while i do have my own unrelated issues, as every human does, i hope that anytime this happens to anyone it can end quickly because it doesn't seem very pleasant at all, and that of course it will happen and you can't stop it, you can at least wait it out, because the next day is always better than the one before. stay beautiful you random people :)


Ya sure it ain't just a mix between melancholy and sadness?


I’m not mad at you I am mad at myself. I need that on my forehead


ARE THOSE TEAR STREAKS ON YOUR FACE, DODIE?!?!?!?  :'(

I almost think they are, but they might be the shadows of her hair on her face.

Rose Vasquez I think you just don't understand because you've never experienced it before. You think it's just a simpler thing because you've never felt as shit as depressed people do. You have to keep this in mind, don't just say really negative and mean things when you don't even know what you're talking about. :/

Tasty pørk cutlet bøwl My pronouns are  she/her thanks.

They want attention and that's exactly what you're giving them. Just stop already.

Midnight Misfit Love you too baby girl xoxo or are you non binary? Probs xoxo

Celestial Demon You don't know what hate speech is, and also, I don't take any messages typed in all lower case seriously because it looks disgusting :-)

Rose Vasquez Omg I agree with every word. She is literally playing a sweet vulnerable gentle tumblr girl who is easily damaged and uses every mental condition which is easy enough to claim to have. Finally somebody gets it.

Rose Vasquez are you aware that everything you feel is chemical? If certain chemicals in the brain are missing, you feel like this. It's not in your control. That's clinical depression. And any kind of depression shrinks parts in your brain and physical effects. Since you're one of those people that need to see it physically with your eyes to understand something, this is for you. Having a "bad day" is completely different from having depression.

Rose Vasquez everyone has good and bad days, but not everyone has depression. Depression is waaaaaay different from having a bad day. I've never had depression, thankfully, but at least I try to understand it. It's not something you can control. Literally nothing can cheer you up. Happiness is essentially nonexistent, I suppose you could say. There's nothing that gives you fulfillment. You feel there's no point to anything. Its different from when someone wants to be over dramatic and say "I wanna kill myself" when a minor inconvenience gets them down. Those people could still have aspirations and things to look forward to, whereas when you're depressed, there's nothing to look forward to. Once again, depression is uncontrollable. It's an actual disorder, and people like you saying shit like this are the reason nobody talks about it and people commit suicide. If we stopped treating depression like a joke and thinking that depressed people just want attention, we could help so many more people and even save their lives.

Rose Vasquez also being bi had nothing to do with this - being closeted can lead to illhealth due to isolation and it being generally a difficult time in someone's life, but this simply isn't the case right now. also you have failed to see the links between the symptoms you stated. anxiety and depression typically go hand in hand. being depersonalised and detached is also a symptom of severe depression. insecurity stems from anxiety. as for 'going blind' that can be linked to both as the fear part is anxiety-based as it is common to fear ones health and wellbeing with anxiety; but can also link to depression as depression can lead one to believe that the body is 'shutting down' and can create physical symptoms that there is a physical condition. please read before making ill educated comments.

Rose Vasquez chemical depression isn't just a bad day, it's where your brain simply isn't functioning properly due to chemical imbalances that cause mood changes. as well as this, it can link with anxiety leading to fear the oneself is sick in many other ways also. idk if it's been medically proven but typically people don't just have one mental illness but rather a few that go hand in hand (e.g. anxiety and depression, or manic depression etc) for example i myself struggle with depression (and other things), i also suffer from severe joint pain. i am working with my team to find out if the two are linked (it's not unknown for mental illness to link to or lead to other physical illnesses) but depression sure as hell makes the physical pain worse. so no she's not just clutching at diagnoses and claiming unnecessarily that she has a million and one different problems, because in actuality many of these problems (which i am positive she is aware of) can be linked and feed off one another. depression also can effect people differently, and the same person differently on different days. for example it is clear that 'venting' and reaching out to her audience is clearly a quick-working release and form of therapy for dodie. however for others that may not be the case. depression and anxiety can make a person feel unwanted and insecure, and pining for attention can be a key symptom of both. so her 'wallowing' isn't really her, but a factor and symptom of mental ill health. plus if you actually paid any attention (even in this video when she said she was having bloods done and had a referral to a clinic) then it's pretty darn clear she's reaching for help and solutions- which can sometimes be difficult with the NHS.

Rose Vasquez she's gone to counsellors and therapists. When that doesn't work she uses making videos as her therapy and in extent it gives people (including me) who experience the same illnesses as her a place to go and just be without having to worry and feel as bad as usual.

The difference between sadness and depression (for me not everyone) is that sadness comes and goes and depression is there. It's a looming figure that is always there and is worse from time to time. Depression is heaviness and hopelessness. Depression is ruthless and merciless.

Please, next time you feel annoyed by people talking about their mental health issues , keep your thoughts to yourself and/or research about what they're saying.

Rose Vasquez You obviously don't watch her snapchats because she's always seeking help and with small changes (she got therapy, pills, YouTube etc)  she gets better. The bad days get better there are less bad days

But of course she's just seeking attention for her medically diagnosed depression

Rose Vasquez What's wrong with her wanting to let out all the shit she's been feeling? When you're depressed, attention is what most people want, because at that moment, they feel like they mean nothing at all. They doubt themselves often, but of course, you wouldn't understand because you've never experienced it.

Rose Vasquez she clearly not looking for cure for her depression. Cause it's not like she making videos to help her feel better about her self or talking directly to the camera to give her self more confidence. It's so clear that she not doing this to help cure her depression. And depression is so not a condition where you feel depressed 5 times more then normal people are easy put into the mode or can suffer great mental damage from it if you don't address it and stay in the state for too long .

Chloee Xx she has mascara streaks if you look closely

Rose Vasquez you say she is not seeking solutions when she was getting therapy and was recently trying antidepressants. Mkay.

You. LITERALLY. have NO idea. Give me strength.

Sometimes wallowing in it IS the quickest cure, otherwise the feelings are just suppressed and bottled up for later.

Sometimes reaching out for attention IS a solution - attention in the most basic 'I want you to know I'm struggling and need help' sense, not an egotistical one.

'Anxious, depersonalised, detached, insecure' - pretty much all part and parcel of depression.

'Bi' - not exactly an inherent problem, but perhaps in her experience it's been a difficult journey figuring it all out amongst her mental health problems. Understandable really.

'Cancer' ... WHAT??? Such a massive, tangential leap. But oooh yes, such a CONVENIENT illness! Honestly, get a grip.

Rose Vasquez 'everyone has ups and downs', are you kidding me? It's a medically diagnosed disorder cause by a chemical imbalance in the brain. People don't have depression for attention, unfortunately you can't escape it, sometimes you want to reach out on a platform where u feel supported.

I don't want to be another person ganging up on you, but I have something else to add that hasn't been addressed. She talks very directly in the video about how she is reminding herself that things will get better and she tried all of those things like going outside etc, but it's a chemical thing and there's really not much you can do but hang on and ride it out. This was just one video where she portrayed herself in a very low-functioning state but almost all of her other videos about depression are optimistic and about actively seeking solutions.

Rose Vasquez Terrible days? More like years. I just love trying explain depression to people, it's just great! Depression just feels like falling, just falling into nothingness, to the point where the sorrow and the pain is just numb. So numb that if you could just fade away you wouldn't feel a thing, just peace and quiet. So yeah, I guess you could say that I have had many terrible days.

Rose Vasquez most of those things are heavily interlinked. Depression is usually paired with anxiety, it's the most popular next to manic depression. Bisexuality is completely separated.

My main problem with her is that she doesn't seek solutions.  She simply wallows--a huge giveaway that she's in it for attention, not a cure.  And how convenient that she has a bundle of other problems and personality deviations.  Think about it.  Not only is she depressed but she's bi, anxious, depersonalized, detached, insecure, allegedly "going blind" in one video.  Next she's going to have cancer.  Whatever gets attention and feeds into her deep-seated belief that she's special.

You're over 19?  I imagined a 12 year old after reading that first sentence.  Anyway, has it ever occurred to you that <b>everyone</b> (not just you) has both great and terrible days.  It's called part of life, not some special condition.  Everyone has ups and downs, so suck it up and learn to deal with life.  You're not special.

You're over 19?  I imagined a 12 year old after reading that first sentence.  Anyway, has it ever occurred to you that *everyone* (not just you) has both great and terrible days.  It's called part of life, not some special condition.  Everyone has ups and downs, so suck it up and learn to deal with life.  You're not special.

Rose Vasquez Hi Rose, funny, you're named as my least favorite flower (I just think that a rose is a cliché flower). Anyways, I was diagnosed with depression when I was 19, and some days are great, and others are absolute shit. I understand everything that she is saying, and it honestly makes me feel like I'm not alone, that someone like Dodie knows what it's like. So much for a "mopey" video.

If I wanted attention, I would make mopey videos and post them on YouTube.  It's sad that you fall for this stuff.

^don't feed into their negativity. they just want attention

Don't feed into her self-wallowing.  That's what she wants.


My anger therapist diagnosed me with high-functioning depression. Great.


When I’m depressed it just feels like nothing, like I don’t matter and everything I usually love is meaningless. It sucks so much


I find it so fucked up that ‘being a teenager’ and having depression is regarded as the same thing.


Some days you just wake up and you feel like poo
Cause that is what your brain has decided to do
(Anybody got the reference?)

agirlhasnoname 14 that song makes me feel understood, most of dodie's songs do.

Barack Omerkel it's down, but you almost got it😊

chrissy hates toast. a video on a channel, i think from the beginning of her song "downer"


"My working head and my not working head don't have sympathy for each other at all." Ouch, I felt that. 😔


When i am depressed my chest is in pain

I have so many things in my head about me

That i am the worse
Tha everything is my fault
Etc

Sometimes i hurt myself
Or cry
Or i am trying to not cry

Today i said
I am going outside
And do something

Maybe do exercises
Or anything
Ride on skateboard
But
Right niw i am in bed
Painting
But i have a break
And i am watching your video


One time I felt like shit and my mom wanted to cheer me up by taking me to an event in a park nearby, I appreciate her trying but I really just wanted to lay in bed all day instead.


Wow. I have never related to someone this much. I thought I was alone, ha. Guess not 🙃


The sad part is when I guilt trip myself for feeling unhappy :< It's never ending


I’m watching this
2019 to feel something
My ex friends birthday is tomorrow and it feel like a knife is cutting my soul
And I feel guilty I don’t wanna go to school tomorrow


What!!! I'm chronically ill and what Dodie talks about with two minds, one good and one bad is true for me too. I see myself in all this so much it's scary. And my mind is healthier than my body at least


I just wanna eat green beans and drink tea with you


If there is just one Video I could save from YouTube...this would it be!thank you sooo much!!


i love watching your videos. but sometimes these videos make me start thinking about how i'm feeling and then i check weather i'm okay. and then i discover taht i'm not okay. than i get sad

Aesthetically Blue saaame. killjoys everywhere

noot noot I'm not ok (I promise) <del>I really hope someone gets this</del>

noot noot I'm not ok (I promise) -I really hope someone gets this-

doddlevloggle you're so sweet. hope things start to get better. ❤

doddlevloggle honestly. your reply has made me so happy and made me forget about anything i was feeling. thank you so much. love you ❤

wheeeeep! don't watch. these vids are mostly for me, to document how I'm feeling. Life is wonderful. Please go make urself a microwave cupcake, or open and window and breathe in the fresh air. Luv u <3

noot noot I'm sorry :/ it'll get better soon love. God bless you ❤ l-/ also I love your profile picture xD


When I’m depressed I just feel so exhausted and some what empty, like I could literally stare off into space and stay like that for hours. And sometimes I’ll feel like crying but I just won’t be able to ya know..


When it's chemical it's like:<br>"My joy is silent. She has been silenced. She's in a coma and can't wake up no matter what. The lighting in my heart changes to a kitchen in the evening when the lights are off, its just about dimming and I'm in my heart's kitchen, missing joy and my contentedness because they are not in my little mind house. Everything has a sleepy blue lighting ."

When it's chemical it's like:
"My joy is silent. She has been silenced. She's in a coma and can't wake up no matter what. The lighting in my heart changes to a kitchen in the evening when the lights are off, its just about dimming and I'm in my heart's kitchen, missing joy and my contentedness because they are not in my little mind house. Everything has a sleepy blue lighting ."


you desc. of depression matched how i feel often so yeah i think im gonna talk to a therapist about that


Don't worry about anything. There's only one way to go when you hit the very bottom. Up. Don't give up yet.


Depression feels like you're a dead husk that's still able to walk around.


i hate it when people say i feel depressed today or some rubbish like that, depression does not come and go you don’t just ‘wake up depressed’ depression stays there. i understand you’re trying to spread awareness but this isn’t the right way.


Does anyone ever feel so sad and heavy that it physically hurts. Like a balloon covered in nails expanding in your chest :/


I’m watching this thinking about how I tell my mom that I am depressed but I now realize that she probably has a different meaning of depressed than what I mean like we’re not on the same page


I feel empty every day and I don't know what to do about it...


juST- aH. the hair is beautiful. yes. 10/10


Sometimes I have an on and off phase of depression like anxiety, my chest feels heavy and my mind just repeats realistically deceiving thoughts until I fully persuade myself for them to be true and when depression starts I just stay quiet with no words to express so I just small talk whenever someone mentiones me. But I am now taking these St Johns wort pills that slowly but I think surely work and I slightly feel better and feel I can still do fun and fulfilling activities.


that's actually rather comforting...I mean I hate when I'm being in that state....but I hate even more that I hate myself for questioning if it's even real >.> because sometimes it just shows up as unbelievable boredom, no satisfaction, no enjoyment in anything, nothing is good enough and everything is irritating....and the hopelessness is more about "I hate this, I don't want this, how can I ever get out of this?is this gonna be my life forever?"....well....so....watching your video, made me atleast feel like there is a spark of hope somewhere, that this might pass and that it's not just me....well...not that it's great that someone else has it...but...maybe you know what I mean....<br>not in a good place here right now...so hello there!

that's actually rather comforting...I mean I hate when I'm being in that state....but I hate even more that I hate myself for questioning if it's even real >.> because sometimes it just shows up as unbelievable boredom, no satisfaction, no enjoyment in anything, nothing is good enough and everything is irritating....and the hopelessness is more about "I hate this, I don't want this, how can I ever get out of this?is this gonna be my life forever?"....well....so....watching your video, made me atleast feel like there is a spark of hope somewhere, that this might pass and that it's not just me....well...not that it's great that someone else has it...but...maybe you know what I mean....
not in a good place here right now...so hello there!


This is a good video to watch before turning off your device and going to sleep at 2AM

I did that, but at 2AM procrastinating about an assignment that was due the next day. That was when I first watched this.


I relate I like do the same thing when I get in my depressive episodes


Everything from 1:52 - 2:50 Sooooo relatable damnit agghh

And 3:13 - I literally do this. That watching a TV show thing and just stopping because you can't keep it up anymore. And then I would avoid the things that would normally bring me joy because I don't want to taint it with my shitty mood


SSRI's made me feel okay but not happy. I didn't feel depressed but I didn't feel happy. And then once I quit the withdrawals were so so so bad


"I have to be kind to myself " For some reason, this helps me feel so much better.


I love Edamame and tea!!! Let's be best friends!!!


Currently, I don't know how I feel. It's so weird. The last days I was unusually tired and felt kind of... normal? That should be good, but after I didn't obsess over everything the alternative turned out to be indifference. I just don't know. I feel like I could be so much more productive without my usual lack of focus holding me back, but then I don't want to do anything. Usually I always feel under pressure and my problems with executive function just turn that into guilt instead of productivity and I don't enjoy stuff because it will be in the back of my mind. But now, I am just tired. Like, physically tired and weak. I tried putting my symptoms into an app that usually works really well diagnosing things like deficiency which will later be confirmed by a doctor, and the only thing it came up with was bipolar disorder. I just don't know. I will just have to go on, surprisingly meeting more friends then usual, doing more and being better without actually being there or feeling happy about. Now I made myself cry. I don't want to go back to constantly being told to do stuff. I need a break. I just have no clue what kind.


Jesus our Lord and savior loves you. He is always there for you. You can tell him anything. He can take your pain. There is hope in Jesus. In his words called the Holy Bible has amazing things in it that will bring joy. And healing. Phillippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.

Peace be with you.
We love you friend.
God bless you.


Okay yeah I get why people are pissed about people 'self diagnosing' themselves but think about it, how else do you know to get help if you don't think you're depressed? I look at it as people who are confused and reaching out for help, rather than people disrespecting or trying to downplay serious mental illnesses. Everyone's thoughts about themselves are valid ❤

Mkkio Harts is this directed at me or in general?

Literally. My first step in being diagnosed was telling the doctor "I think I'm depressed". How else do you really get a 'formal' diagnosis?

Georgia Neill I totally get what you're saying and I agree that everyone's feelings are valid and that depression isn't something to be taken lightly, but I have met quite a few people who will jump at the chance to tell me that they're 'sad sometimes' or that they 'probably have mild depression because they feel sad a lot' because they see the sympathy that people who actually have depression get and want to jump on that wagon. The sad thing is, the people who want to feel special in that respect make everyone think that every kid who claims to have depression is lying. I just get frustrated when people try to call more attention to themselves through a means that shouldn't be used that way. All of that said, I would never disregard anyone's feelings if I don't know them personally. It's not my business to diagnose people I don't know.

Yeah. It pisses me off when people say that it just causes more problems when you self-diagnose. Of course no one should just type in, "What do headaches mean," on Google, but you know when your body isn't functioning right. If you keep thinking that something's wrong when it's not, then you have confirmed that you have a disorder that makes you feel like something is off all of the time.


This video mad me cry with laughter and then with sadness

But I too love edamame


my depression, is a bit weird, i feel like im in a black dark room, i feel like im dreaming, it's like everlasting silence, even when my family is laughing loud and screaming, i hear nothing. i went to a therapist, and nothing helped, my therapist did NOT understand what MY depression was. She thought it was a phase, and i told her it wasn't she brushed it off like i was just a sad 11 year old, (im 14 now) and i ended up not going anymore. but being sad, is way different from being depressed, definition of sadness is feeling or showing sorrow, depressed is in a state of general unappiness.


4:31 - 4:36 words i live by smh so trueeee


I kinda relate to this, 'cause everyday I can do things and fake happiness but I still feel like shit all the time and no, happy is not a choice, "fake it till you make it" doesn' t work when you are depressed, every single one of this statement is bullshit.
Now I'm in a phase where I get very sad and spaced out almost everyday, then I feel so fucking angry about this because I should be happy, then I cry because of anger and I want to beat the shit out of people and destroy everything with a baseball bat. After this moments of rage I just cry because I disappointed myself and everyone around me and I usually cry myself to sleep while listening to the tv mumbling things that I can't understand cause I don't feel real at all.
It's shit. It's just shitty. I woke up and had a panick attack today for no fucking reason at all. It's a huge pile of shit.

Don't know if this will help but try to escape into anther world, by reading books, watching anime, tv shows etcetera etcetera. It worked for me but i don't know if it would help for you. Hope you get better soon

Cris Writer I'm so proud of you <3 I know how hard it is, I've been struggling with depression, anxiety, and psychosis for 4 years now, so I do know its like super shitty. you're doing well. you're doing amazing. normal doesn't exist. so dont stress about that anyway

Kermit Manson Today I feel a little bit better. I do try positive thinking, I did that "count things that were good today" for a long period of time, but I am so frustrated with my brain. I want it to work, I just want everything to work normally. Not even be happy, because I know that nobody can be always happy, but just normal. After five years I'm kinda just losing hope in everything. <br>But I am still trying. I will always try my best to be stable and a little productive every day.

Kermit Manson Today I feel a little bit better. I do try positive thinking, I did that "count things that were good today" for a long period of time, but I am so frustrated with my brain. I want it to work, I just want everything to work normally. Not even be happy, because I know that nobody can be always happy, but just normal. After five years I'm kinda just losing hope in everything.
But I am still trying. I will always try my best to be stable and a little productive every day.

Cris Writer sorry for the late reply. listen. not everyday over the past five years have been bad. what I do everyday, no matter how shitty I think the day was, I count 5 things that were good about the day, and 3 things that weren't. days aren't good and bad. they're just days. I'm proud of you for getting through these past five years. I'm sure it was awful at parts. but I still believe you can do it. things will change, but only if you have the courage to let them. sometimes as humans we get comfortable in our sadness and are wary to leave, seems stupid but its true. so break out of your comfort zone

you did this to me, you told coach sylvester abou-

@Kermit Manson it has been like this for the past five years of my life, nothing changed, I still feel so bad about everything. I don't know how to fix me. I don't even think that I can actually be fixed, parts of me will always be broken.
I won't kill myself anyway: funerals cost way to much and my family can't afford it, so yeah. Still thinking about the well being of everyone over mine. Good job me.
((I'm sorry for venting to you like this, it has been a really shitty day and I don't have a lot of people to talk about it around me))

Cris Writer I'm so sorry you have to go through this. its awful, I'm going through it myself. but please hold on. if you're looking for a sign that you should stay, this is it. I know you can get through. it won't always be like this.


Some days I feel so heavy and my bones feel cold and I can’t get warm and when I’m around people or trying to live my life it’s like I’m a little tiny pebble swimming in my body and I’m trying real hard to get up to the surface and peak out of my eyes and see the world and see what’s happening if that makes sense.


When you have a chance to be still. Silently, intentionally,  ask God to say something to you.


Wtf this is my life for years. I thought everything is "normal" I mean i dont even know it any other way. I dont want to have a depression....


My advice is:<br>Let it go, and hold on to that feeling.

My advice is:
Let it go, and hold on to that feeling.


I used to be depressed,  I'm better now, but once in a while I'll have a bad day and on those days I can relate to this so much

love you dodie♡
hope you're feeling okay again ♡♡


Thats how im feeling right now. Its funny, just about a month ago i was as happy as ever, but every time the new year comes, i always get depressed. Every summer i get depressed. Why is it always that time? Summer and the end of the year. Is it because everyones out having a good time being happy while im stuck at home? I guess. I think i might have Seasonal affective disorder, which is a mood disorder characterized by depression that occurs at the same time every year. Its common, so i wouldnt doubt that i have it. I hate it. Its like all the life and spark was sucked out of me. Especially being around my friends at school who are always so happy and cheerful, they always know if something is wrong with me if im not my loud cheerful self lol. It takes so much of my energy and im constantly tired. Its like One moment i can think wow i actually feel good, and them seconds later im depressed all over again. I just wanna stay in bed all day. Cause whats the point? Its not like I'm doing anything. I dont have plans. So whats the point? Im just sad. I don't know why. I just am and i cant explain it. Of course it definitely isnt as bad as last year. Man, it nearly tore me and my dads relationship apart. But i know hes always there for me. He's all i really have tbh. But yeah, if any of you guys feel the same way then atleast im not alone 😂


Just don't get into regular drinking. That's when depression can really take you down.


Me since the start of summer and I've stopped seeing my school friends. One day during the school year I went home and wasn't depressed for the first time in a long time and I cried about this girl I've fallen in love with and I still felt happy in some way because I wasn't depressed. Still sad as fuck but just not depressed. I just keep going back and editing and adding on to this. I also have ADHD so things already don't stimulate me as much as they should and with depression it makes me want to not move and to just sleep and be unconscious for a while because maybe when I wake up everything will be better. Don't really know how I'm feeling today. I think I'm in the middle. I think I'm depressed but I feel understood so it's not as bad.


While I was scrolling through the comments I noticed a lot of people that aggreed with dodie and were like "yup I am depressed, too". And I am not saying you're wrong because I don't know you and cannot judge you, but what I do think is that especially because  young teenagers have access to all that information about mental illnesses in the internet without already being fully developed many of them develop a habit of thinking themselves into something until they really are affected by their thinking patterns.
I am studying psychology and neuroscience (this doesn't make me a proffessional though) and guys, depression is not "today I feel depressed, tomorrow it's better". These are bad moods or depressive episodes. They are not nice, that is true, but they are not depression, and you better be glad you don't have to suffer from it. There is a dangerous romanticizing of mental illnesses going on - like you are not special, authentic, beautiful enough if you're not somehow mentally damaged.
But mental illnesses are not cool, or nice, or like a necklace you put on to decorate yourself. Like dodie described, mental illnesses can be very physical and sometimes, depression can't be healed. Sometimes, doctors and psychologists stand there with nothing in their hands anymore, because the brain is too complex and unexplored and they can't go further with you. They don't have any treatments anymore.
Depression differs from person to person but mostly it is a state of not eating, because food disgusts you, of seriously losing weight, of not sleeping or sleeping too much, but not because you are lazy or tired, but because you can't stand the daylight and nothing brings you joy anymore, and sleeping is similar to being dead. You don't go on Youtube, you don't watch series or TV, you're not even on the internet, because nothing interests you, you don't find the energy to do basically anything, not even the things you actually love, everything irritates you, makes you angry and sad, even if there is only a tiny thing standing in your way. This is depression, and it goes on for weeks and weeks and months and for some people for years or their whole life. Not for days. Depression doesn't go on holidays and comes back. Bad moods or Depressive episodes do.
I have ambivalent feelings about dodie making a video about her being depressed, which involves making a plan, actually filming yourself talking about what is going on, then editing and uploading it. Like I said, I can't judge her because I don't know her and I am sure she has mental problems (especially with dissociation, I found her decription very authentic) and it is also not my business. She makes her inner life public though so this involves people having opinions about it. And I don't know ... the depression I had didn't allow me to have any idea for anything, let alone realizing an idea. And I am a creative person.
But she can do whatever she wants to and I hope she will get better soon.


I'm a freshman at college. I moved here in a city miles away from home. The first month of college was ok i guess. I still had the motivation to study new stuff and meet new people. I enjoyed going to class. I reviewed for the exams and i pass all requirements. But then something happed and just like that, i woke up one morning to a feeling of nothing. I didn't felt anything. I went to school and avoided everyone. I didnt pay attention to lectures. A week passed and i'm still not ok. My friends are getting worried and i told them i'm ok and that i dont have a problem with them. I told them it's me. Exam week came and i didnt study at all because all that i have the energy to do was to drag my ass to class but bs mentally absent. I slept a lot. I didnt go out, i went straight to my apartment from class. I ate a lot too. Then came the giving of grades and i saw that i failed my exams. My morale got even lower. I become more quiet, i sleep more often, i did not respond to texts and chat messages. I enabled thr Do Not Disturb feature on my phone. Then suddenly, i wake up feeling better. I felt the warmth of thd sunlight on my face. I felt the urge to say send a good morning text to my parents. I came to school excited after a long time. I was hoping everything would go back to normal, but it did not. My friends drifted away and find othdr company. My grades are slipping and i understood less in class. I didnt know how to get my grades up again. Exam week came again and i actually studied this time. But i found it hard because i was mentally absent in the lectures on those topics. I fucked up my academic and social life and so now im struggling. Im always alone now. I havent had another episode but im always lonely now. Sometimes i wish that i could go back to not feeling anything at all because right now, it's so hard. It's hard to have a depressive episode then go back to normal after you snap out of depression. It's harder if you dont have anyone who understands what you're going through. Im not even diagnosed with depression, i just self-diagnosed so im not even sure if this is depression.<br>I just wanted to share this. I feel you all, im going through the same thing as you.

I'm a freshman at college. I moved here in a city miles away from home. The first month of college was ok i guess. I still had the motivation to study new stuff and meet new people. I enjoyed going to class. I reviewed for the exams and i pass all requirements. But then something happed and just like that, i woke up one morning to a feeling of nothing. I didn't felt anything. I went to school and avoided everyone. I didnt pay attention to lectures. A week passed and i'm still not ok. My friends are getting worried and i told them i'm ok and that i dont have a problem with them. I told them it's me. Exam week came and i didnt study at all because all that i have the energy to do was to drag my ass to class but bs mentally absent. I slept a lot. I didnt go out, i went straight to my apartment from class. I ate a lot too. Then came the giving of grades and i saw that i failed my exams. My morale got even lower. I become more quiet, i sleep more often, i did not respond to texts and chat messages. I enabled thr Do Not Disturb feature on my phone. Then suddenly, i wake up feeling better. I felt the warmth of thd sunlight on my face. I felt the urge to say send a good morning text to my parents. I came to school excited after a long time. I was hoping everything would go back to normal, but it did not. My friends drifted away and find othdr company. My grades are slipping and i understood less in class. I didnt know how to get my grades up again. Exam week came again and i actually studied this time. But i found it hard because i was mentally absent in the lectures on those topics. I fucked up my academic and social life and so now im struggling. Im always alone now. I havent had another episode but im always lonely now. Sometimes i wish that i could go back to not feeling anything at all because right now, it's so hard. It's hard to have a depressive episode then go back to normal after you snap out of depression. It's harder if you dont have anyone who understands what you're going through. Im not even diagnosed with depression, i just self-diagnosed so im not even sure if this is depression.
I just wanted to share this. I feel you all, im going through the same thing as you.


This video is old and I very seriously doubt that you will see this comment but it is so genuinely...comforting to see someone else in the midst of depression.


Oof I felt that thanks for explaining the things I feel that is unexplainable for me


Ok, I’ve finally got a video to show people when they try to tell me they know what depression is like even though it’s obvious they have no clue


This video was me for the last decade. I cannot even describe to you how much this is what I've been going through. Life is a lot better since a year ago and I NEVER thought I'd say that. I'm a musician too. It seems to affect us creative types the most. You're not alone, Dodie. Remember that when you feel really spaced out, I'm going through it too and so are many others. You are real, your brain is just hiding because life is scary. It'll be brave again one day. I hope you get the help at Maudsley. I'd love to go but I'm too far away. They have medications that directly targets DP/DR. SSRIs often don't really help it but everyone's different. It has worked for some. Hang in there, Dodes ❤

I do mindfulness for 10 minutes every day and a 30 minute body scan twice a week. I can not even convey how much it helps, not only just with anxiety but with life in general and with obsession over DP/DR as well which in turn is the best thing to stop so you can give your brain a rest and for a lot of folks it can lessen or help curb their DP/DR. I experience it still a bit but after hardcore DP/DR for years and panic during that whole time, obsessing over not being able to feel or enjoy anymore etc - I'm about 90/95% here most of the time. It fluctuates for me and there's always a bit about but I can have fun and experience things around it, which I never thought I would be able to do. I still struggle with blunted emotion a lot of times but I've noticed that because I'm expecting my DP/DR to keep me blunted, I stay blunted. When I have genuine, unexpected experiences the DP/DR doesn't get in the way because I'm not self-protecting or expecting grandiose experience of self. This hasn't happened till this year and as I mentioned, I'm notching up a decade with this 24/7. I had a moment of complete clarity in my Screenwriting class a few weeks ago and it was just absolutely joyus. Like, to know it can happen, y'know? I just gotta give myself time and keep working on it in a kind way rather than punishing myself emotionally for having it in the first place.

You cannot think your way out of DP/DR. Your brain sort of assumes it's a sort of equation type problem and it's desperately trying to figure out how to fix it, but the fix is not in the fixing - the fix is in the letting go.

The drug is named Lamotrigine and when referred, you want Dr. Elaine Hunter. Her direct address, email and telephone number is on here - http://www.kcl.ac.uk/ioppn/depts/ps/research/neurobiologialmechanisms/depersonalisationresearchunit.aspx

Maybe send a letter for self-referral?

People can take OmegaBrite to help lift depression but I don't know much about it so if you are considering, really do research it. Same with Lamotrigine, research the hell out of it and make sure you have a lot of support around you if you do decide to take it. Make sure you're aware of the risks with it and that it's something you're ready for. Desperation can make us make hasty decisions. I was always looking for a miracle cure in medication, but - and not to dampen your enthusiasm - I think it's actually more likely to be long-term internal work. Then again, I've never tried Lamotrigine. But my advice is to be cautious and wary of thinking a med can be the cure. Head meds come with side effects (I'm sure you know this but I just want to be real about it). You need CBT life structure in order to manage your brain's proclivity to dissociate long term for sure. Therapy is vital with this issue.

Absolutely best of luck to you, Dodes. Hope this helps <3

The thing with DP/DR is that it is essentially a symptom of an underlying issue that needs to be addressed in therapy and then a life structure incorporated to work around it and make it so that you have all the tools in place for you to get better and stay better. It is extremely rare that it's a stand-alone problem so yes, therapy is key. You are real, and you are - and I mean this genuinely - not doomed, Dodie. Your brain is having a reaction in this way in order to keep you safe because it's mistaken life as a constant threat. It can be undone and don't let depression or nihilism lead you to believe it won't because it's a lie.

I really recommend mindfulness courses. Grounding techniques! Meditation is key, I believe. DP/DR tends to box you into a corner in your mind. I think I might even have the email of one of the psychiatrists that the in-patient guy sent me if you'd like me to forward it to you. I'll pop back with the name of the drug.

I was in contact with a guy who was treated at Maudsley. I think he was an inpatient. He told me he was put on a drug for mood stabilisation (which is actually an epilepsy drug). My bipolar friend is on the same drug and it can help with OCD as well. She has done really well on it. The issue is, as with all medication, there are side effects. This particular drug can cause life-threatening rashes so what they do is they put you on a very low dose for a little while and monitor you gently upping it to safe levels. My bipolar friend has been on it for years and she has had no ill side effects and says it's saved her life and that she is as close to normal as possible on it. The guy I spoke to who trialed it at Maudsley did have the reaction and I don't think it worked out for him. But it's really different strokes for different folks, and your biochemistry is unique. What happens to one doesn't happen to the other. I've spoken to thousands upon thousands of folks suffering with DP/DR over the last decade since it happened to me. I advise never to go on nomorepanic.com to see all the people in the panic stage and the long-termers who are severely depressed, nihilistic and disillusioned. A long-termer is someone who hasn't sorted out the underlying issues and maybe cannot afford to or is reluctant to. If you're going to research it, research cured or stories of people who've gotten better. There's quite a few videos on youtube with great advice for DP/DR, people who've suffered it strongly for like 10 years who've come out of it.

Omg I keep thinking about this. It's like there's a cure somewhere in London and I'm just lying in bed feeling crap when the thing that could make me better exists

Holy shit I am NOT GIVING UP. I WILL get referred there


I'd be depressed too if I owned a MacBook. 😉


I get reoccuring depression as well and they stay for few months at a time.I've actually kinda gotten used to  it I mean it still sucks and I still cry alot in bed but i know what to expect and I know it will get better some day. However my bf never had the experience and doesnt understand at all. He sometimes get fed up or frustrated with me or worse try to "cheer me up" with peptalks. He just doesnt understand the experience and i dont blame him I didnt either before I started suffering from it. Its just that when the person you feel the closest doesnt understand you at all it makes you feel 100 times worse because not only are you depressed, but now you are also feel alone and hate yourself


feeling pain is good. it means you're so much alive. But When You're deppressed you feel nothing because you stop living. not sorry not worry just emptiness.


Keep us updated. <3 I really do wish the best for you, and hopefully therapy will work something out.


whenever I'm depressed I just feel really really tired but I'm not actually tired....I wouldn't say I'm depressed but a few times a month I do get depressed if that makes sense ..


Sometimes when I feel depressed I just wish that I don't wanna be happy anymore


I’m depressed ☹ I’m just so lost man that’s what I feel, I’m just confused about everything I guess idk


thank you for speaking up about this. I've been feeling like this everyday for the past three years, I don't even get excited for my birthday or meeting my friends. and it keeps me from doing things that I love, like playing instruments or singing lol and therapy hasn't worked for me


i hope you feel better  at your pace, a big hug from a shy fan


This is a very raw video and I love dodie but she did shoot this while she was in a depressive period so if you want to understand a bit better by someone also depressed you should watch daniel and depression or you can talk to me. Read on if want more bants.

 I saw a video just before this one about her and dan's depression and bawled out my eyes thinking about my depression and then came here and felt a bit better so thank you dodie


Thx for sharing. Really glad I'm not alone like this


Haha oh why do I laugh at myself? Because I can relate.


Does anyone else have it where they feel depressed for what feels like forever but then they have a good day where you're maybe not happy, but you're just comfortable. So you think "hey this is great! Maybe I'm not depressed anymore" but then the next day it comes back?


'Your brain is so heavy, you can't help but notice it'.  This totally sums up when I my mood is really low.


Idk about everyone else but I'm currently balling rn. Just hearing her explain her experience reminded me of me and idk ;(


For me I dont wanna lay in bed I wanna run away from everything..


I don't think I have depression.. but still.. I can relate to a lot of these things :/ I'm doing better now tho, but it was horrible a while back. But oh well, after the holidays it'll probably happen all over again


Hol up... You can microwave beans? I've been siting here for hours with nothing to eat and I never even... I gotta go microwave some beans!


Depression feels like I'm in warm water and I just Don't want to get out cause I'd just rather stay depressed than feel better and fall again cause it just hits harder each time. I'm not gonna live long. I'm almost certain one day my life's just going to be ended by my own hands. I just haven't built up the courage yet.


I’m feeling it I don’t really know what to do it’s the weekend i feel like I want to sleep but I’m restless I keep trying to listen to music keep skip like I can’t I want to watch Netflix but stop watching I feel like I want to take bath but 15mins I’m getting out


Yep, I've definitely been there before. <br>Whenever I go there it feels like I never left.

Yep, I've definitely been there before.
Whenever I go there it feels like I never left.