I feel so bad now.
I hate it how you talk about that and meanwhile I love it more than everything.

I must tell you something. I am afraid. So afraid of getting a mental illness. I'm really in my way to get One I don't know.

Sometimes there are times when I feel ok, like it's all cool, I'm ok, I got friends and it's really ok, but sometimes I feel like I can't laugh and I can't smile for days and more days.

The thing is right now I really feel ok, I got a cool time and I feel like a normal kid. But I am SOOO afraid of those bad things to come back and me being sad again.

And you must know One thing. I am 13 years old. I am really young and I have no depression or anything like that yet but I'm afraid of getting it soon.

Because I feel so unnormal, so weird. Not that kind of good-weird but some sort of insane. I feel more like an adult than all the other kids and I overthink everything soooo many ways too often!!

I could cry right now. I don't want that. I want to be a normal *

I know how you feel... and I think this is more confusong than always being sad etc. becouse I would know that something is wrong with me? like, I would be able to tell myself that I might have depression or anxiety. but becouse those thoughts or feelings are not always there I'm afraid if I talk about it to someone they would think that I'm making all these up for attention. and sometimes I think to myself if I'm making all these up, not for attention but maybe becouse I've been seeing more and more people with those problems? it is complicated and I'm afraid about many things. I get why you don't want to talk about it to anyone. and to be honest it is good to know I'm not the only one. so I hope we will find some way of help? and btw I'm 17.

I feel the same and I hate it because I'm scared to get help and I constantly deny myself of having anything wrong with me at all. It might not be depression but the amount of sadness and overthinking and constant breakdowns I have is becoming abnormal :/

Hey I know you already have a lot of comments and advice, but I just want to say that it's okay to be afraid of getting a mental illness, but having one isn't the end of the world. Often fixating on something can make the danger seem more real or worse than it is, and although I know it sounds dumb like "Just don't think about it!!" instead maybe try when you start worrying, say to yourself "I'm having the thought that <i>_</i>", accept the thought then push it away. I hope you feel better soon, and don't be afraid to ask someone you trust for advice. <3

Hey I know you already have a lot of comments and advice, but I just want to say that it's okay to be afraid of getting a mental illness, but having one isn't the end of the world. Often fixating on something can make the danger seem more real or worse than it is, and although I know it sounds dumb like "Just don't think about it!!" instead maybe try when you start worrying, say to yourself "I'm having the thought that ___", accept the thought then push it away. I hope you feel better soon, and don't be afraid to ask someone you trust for advice. <3

+daisyjsore stop trying to diagnose people you don't know on the internet. that will just stress them out even more.

please don't listen to anyone on the internet "diagnosing" you with some kind of disorders. don't worry too much about getting any either. if you feel like you have some genuine problems, go see a doctor but if you're just worried you might face such deep problems that you might get sick, then try to block that out. you're perfectly normal and i promise you that most people around you are going through the same thing, or at least something similar. cheer up a bit, kiddo and if you can't, go see a doctor!!

+Vlogging Julez I'm the same age and I feel similar

Ok to all of you now: You are so nice and supportive and I want to thank you so much because you really helped me in a way, thanks!

I guess I don't (really don't I'm sure) need a doctor right now. I'm ok right now. But now I promise you I will go to a doctor as soon as I notice anything getting worse.

Thank you for your help!

Honestly, all of you! Thanks so much!

* you think the way you think and it will reasonable with you making it all alright.
If you are not ok and they tell you you are then you will feel that they are wrong and even though it will be hard to stand up to that kind of situation and essentially rejection, you will need to try again by talking to another doctor. Maybe even more than just these two. But if you feel you are not ok and none of the reasons someone gives you to tell you that what you feel is normal, chances are you are not ok and that person simply doesn't understand how you are truly feeling.
That sucks, I know, the whole process does, but it is better to get help now while others bearly notice anything being "wrong" and while you still have the will and energy to find help than let it get worse to the point where you might be too deep into it get help as easily and especially learn to handle it as easily.
(P.S.: your friend probably simply didn't know how to handle the situation and without meaning to hurt you)

+Vlogging Julez i understand that and you don't have to let people know if your don't want to. Doctors are completely anonymous (unless they think you will hurt yourself or someone else) so unless you want others to know you don't have to let them know. Yes everyone gets sad sometimes but it's better to be safe and get support than risk it becoming worse.

+Countless Colors I am ok. Even those "bad times" are not really bad. Yet. I'm just afraid that it gets worse because I think of so many things, I guess I can't get happy that way.

* saying that I don't want to take away from the experiences of those with serious mental illnesses. That thought is just something that kind of helped me normalize and accept mental illness as something unpleasant, yes, but also something that is part of life and not something that makes the one experiencing it that "crazy person" that one just identifies as crazy and with that almost doesn't see them as human anymore. Being mentally ill is just about as human as it gets really. We are sentient beings after all and the way our brains work that simply includes a proneness to getting stuck on some thoughts and developing a mental illness or something of the sort every now and again.
But I'm getting off topic here.
What I really wanted to say was that if you are worried about a mental illness growing inside you, you definitely should go to the doctor no matter how old you are. Just tell them and have them make sure that you are ok/not ok. If you are ok, they will give you a reason why *

+Iain Gillespie my problem is... Nobody even knows that I am sometimes this kind of sad. And I don't want them to know. I don't want to be threatened like I'm not ok because I am ok

Everybody has their times when they're a bit sad haven't they?

I understand how you feel and I know you feel ok sometimes but it's better to get support than to have bad times come back. I know you feel like you're alone in how you're thinking but you aren't, but no matter what you can get the support to get to the happy place you want to get to. I hope that you find your way to a better place.

Hey, I'm not Dodie (obviously) but still I thought I reply to you because what you said really resonated with me.
 I am actually 20 years old and still feel too young to speak up about all the weird and strangely complex seeming thoughts and worries I'm having.
Also I too have recently experienced phases of good-normal-well being followed by phases of weird-sad-pointlessness feeling. It has recently gotten better since I am now finally starting to settle on a decision I needed to make for quite a while and that had been stressing me out so very much.
All this time I had not really talked to anybody about this and the longer I kept it to myself I felt it getting worse and worse. At some point I talked to a friend about it and he kind of dismissed it as something we all go through in life at some point. I actually agree to the degree that we all have probably at some point in our life experiences the very basis of one mental illness or another maybe even without realizing it. But *

+Carla Moreno funny because my English also may be bad as hell. I'm from Germany.
Well yea. Talking is cool :)
How?

+Vlogging Julez So... I may not be Dodie but I've been trying to write this for around 10 minutes and the thing I want to say is that I feel the same and I was thinking that we could talk...idk... (sorry if my english is bad, i speak spanish...)

+Anya Pailthorpe could you and +daisyjsore please red the comment I just added in wich I say why I feel like not doing this? 😅😅

+Iain Gillespie I know you may be right.
I've already thought about that but the thing right now is:

I've lately started to feel ok with that. Learned many things and learned how to be cool with how odd I am and stupid stuff like that.

And if I now began to talk to someone about that, all my feelings would come back you know?

All I want is to be happy and forget about ALL THESE DAMN THINGS.

I can't even describe about what silly things I think. I feel like no human being should ever think about stuff like that and I also think no one does and has ever done.

And I think if I talked to nobody and enjoyed my time as long as it's not bad I'm ok and I'm gonna forget about stuff.

Do I sound silly?

+Vlogging Julez first of all, I know that I'm no Dodie Clark, but I saw your comment and I read it. I read all of it, and I just really hope that you're okay. I think that worrying this much about getting a mental illness is probably not good and that you should talk to someone about it. Speaking of which, have you spoken about this to someone other than your friend who is unsupportive? Maybe you should find someone who believes you more; someone good for your mental health in that way.

This sounds like you may already have depression or possibly bipolar disorder. I think you should go see a doctor for some kind of definitive diagnosis <3

Just so you know you're never "too young" and you should probably seek help as soon as possible. I know it may seem like no one else feels the same at your age but I can guarantee that you aren't on your own in what you are feeling. Myself and several friends of mine developed mental illness' at young ages but didn't get help because you assume you're "too young to know" and it can manifest. It's a much better idea to see someone like a GP or parent/guardian or teacher you trust. Not many people your age will know how to be supportive so I would recommend seeing a professional or at least an adult. (i know i'm not dodge but i hope you feel better/get help soon)

Uhmmm, Dodie? Could you please read that ( I know it's much I'm sorry) and ... I don't know... Say something?<br>It's stupid I know 😅

Uhmmm, Dodie? Could you please read that ( I know it's much I'm sorry) and ... I don't know... Say something?
It's stupid I know 😅

* kid and I don't want to be like that.

And my very best friend wich I really love is really not supportive.

She told me "You really have psychological problems." But then she went and acted like everything was normal and I don't understand that. When she DOES notice me being not completely alright why does she not help me or whatever but just tell me about that and go?

Oh my gosh I didn't even want to write that much. No idea. I just feel odd and stupid and wrong here.

And on top of that I also just feel like I am not even allowed to think these things I do think, because I am so young and nobody at the same age thinks about these things the way I do.

Ok now I go, sorry.


I am 50 and I have depersonalization and derealization non stop from 15 year old no escape so tired....


I came to watch this video not to feel alone.. I have been feeling pretty meh sometime now i guess.. I dont remember well. Even though everything is fine i feel like its not.. And i feel like im in the dream, its scary.. Sorry for writing this.. I dunno where else..


I just can't stand it, I developed insomnia because of this shitty disorder and everything fells fake plastic flat and overwhelming I just feel like throwing up constantly and like I'm allways on the verge of completely losing my mind  its insufferable, i constantly feel like my head is going to explode, I wouldnt even want my worst enemy to go through this, but I feel like things are getting better and I constantly remind myself that if others got through this I can too, I am strong and brave, I've made it this far and I'll keep improving, and I pray to whatever may be up there you get though this too because it's really a shitty and unfortunate thing to be going through this but I know that things can and allways will get better, stay strong and hopefull, others have and we too will get through this


i dont have depersonailition but i have lots of anxiety and i dont feel myself and i just want to be normal

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I have a lot of anxiety. I really don't like going on meds cause I have a lot health problems too. I feel completely lost in my life and don't know what to do. But I gave my life to Jesus and became a christian its helped me to feel a little better. I'm still praying that the lord will heal me but it gave me a feeling of hope and comfort


Mate, I know it's outdated now, but you're alright :)


My head hurts so much while watching this cuz im.trying so hard to cry but its not coming out. Why does nothing want to listen to me? No one even bothers to talk to me anymore. When i ask for help they call me attention seeking so i stopped trying and this led to self harm and staying up all night so that i can feel more pain than i already do.


Dodie, try to stay strong. This may sound stupid from a 13 year old girl in the middle of school, who is a complete stranger to you but I want you to know loads of people are here for you. Your amazing and you can get over this, lots of people get over stuff like this, I got over something like that. I didn't know what it was but I felt like digging a hole and living in it until I die and like I wanted to block everything and everyone out of my life because if sly so down. Then stuff started getting better but it was still bad, I went out more and did more but I still felt grey. I have never put a name to it so I just call it 'my grey days'. It started when I was about 11 and a half and I slowly felt better about a year and a bit later. Now when I tell people why I was off school for a bit they say I was making it up for attention and to get out of school, but I like school (in a way). I told 2 of my closest friends and my girlfriend. They where really supportive and helped me get


I have anxiety but sometimes i wonder if i'm kinda depressed, like not full on depressed, just extremely negative and mentally unwell-ish. But i don't know and i feel bad because i know that whatever i have (if i do have anything) is no where near as bad as what other people have and then i feel myself wishing that it was worse, and i know that i should never ever ever think that because i am so lucky to not have depression or anything worse and i hate myself for thinking it but i just kind of want an excuse, a reason. But then again i feel like im just a negative bitch who needs to wake up and stop being so ungrateful but i just cant and i put myself down a lot. And i feel that im actually ok and im just thinking it all up and making excuses because i actually feel ok most the time and i have came a long way. (I used to be extremely negative and nearly depressed but i got out of it) and now i just don't know anymore. Am I ok? Maybe i'm just making a big deal about nothing. I don't know.


Ive had a couple of spells of this. I dont know if it is normal to not have it all the time but have it once or twice or 3 times. I only got it when i was walking on a really busy street. I had to sit down because everything was bright, i felt like i was dreaming and like i wasn’t really there, i couldnt remember the last 5 seconds. I felt really strange. Does anyone know if it is normal to only have it afew times


I want to go to a doctor but I can’t. I’m not comfortable talking about my feelings to anyone.


hi, i wonder if someone can help me. i suffer from panic attacks and anxiety which sucks but i am getting therapy so thats cook. but sometimes i get this really intense feeling of anxiety in my tummy, the only way i can describe it is that it feels like when i felt homesick when i was younger (if i was at sleepover or something) but i could get it at home or anywhere. Its really wierd and its started happening more. Does anyone else get this?


You know, I... i feel like this is a safe space so I can say what I feel and I can delete a comment if things don't go well. I honestly have been feeling very down not just lately but for the past year so I looked into it and took some mental online screenings because honestly I couldn't stop obsessing over it and they said that i was showing symptoms of certain disorders. I want to seek help but I don't want to waste my family's time or money and every time I've brung it up to someone, they've said it's because I'm growing up since I am still relatively young. Nothing hurts me more than that because I am constantly obsessing over the fact that I don't know whether what I feel is real or not or if a part of me hidden in the dark abyss of my mind is just seeking attention so I just keep to myself and honestly i just don't know what to do. Wow it feels good to get that off my chest. Good luck, Dodie. I know that this comment may not have a lot to do with you per say but I want to thank you for creating such a safe environment that I along with many others feel comfortable with expressing ourselves here.

Sonus Isawesome I relate to what you're saying. I feel like I don't deserve to be sad, and that what if I'm making up these bad thoughts and they're all not real, and if thinking these thoughts and doubting them is worse than actually thinking them and if I'm making things up for attention or why if I do want attention. very confusing. so you're not alone I guess.


I don’t know you but I love you I hope your feeling better


Its weird
It feels like that nothing is really real
People are just moving around and around me
Im a burden like a rock
No one wants a rock for a friend
For the people who are my friensd
I have no idea why they want to talk to me
Some days its really bright and weird. Like is that the sun? No one think theres nothing wrong
I wish i could go back. To when i was younger because it was easier


God, you're so wonderfully important. <3

aye Stevie you helped me with coming out

I understand that you're probably getting advice from everywhere and you probably don't want more. Having said that, I've been told that documenting the good things that happen in pictures and in videos so that you have evidence of them happening and constructing your personal timeline can really help with depersonalisation. It's just a thought. I love you!

+doddleoddle you are wonderfully brave for making this video. These are hard things to talk about. I know because I suffer from anxiety too. Keep pressing on....it will get better....I promise. :)


nothing feels normal or ok. I'm waking up everyday and the first thing I think is 'what is the fucking point in doing this again?' on a day to day basis I can't be bothered to do anything. I don't want to eat or read or watch my favourite TV shows or movies because nothing makes me happy and I don't see the point in anything. I think about the future and I just cry and I can't stop crying. I feel like there is no point in doing anything because nothing will ever make me happy and I will never be OK. there is no point in anything because I think I'm incapable of feeling anything at all and life is pointless and I shouldn't try because I'll never feel right again and I'll just hate everything and everyone forever. I don't think I'll ever be satisfied. I've forgotten what happiness feels like and I don't think I'll ever feel it again.

this video is old but I came back to it because I love dodie and I just wanted to vent.


buy a bike and ride it - sounds arbitrary but it changed my life 10 years ago. I had Councillors and psychologists and then i rode a bicycle. There are so many reasons why it helped me, just try it.


I am the same..... but mine is really sad.... I don't feel like me... had enough of my life.


fuck. its like hearing myself. you are not alone i stg. just as mental over here aha X


Sorry, but you don't have a right to feel perfect and happy and sorted 24/7.  It's just life. You moved. So do millions of people. You miss your old house and familiar surroundings. So do millions of people.  Life is shit, deal with it. Writing it all off to "mental illness" isn't neccessarilly the answer, you don't always need help to not be unhappy, sometimes we're just unhappy due to circumstance and none of us like it.

I have experience of anxiety too but I don't try to ascribe it to anything other than myself, and I take responsibility for dealing with it, though if I need objective professional input I seek it.  Too many people of your age lack the ability to be unhappy and just sit with it. Nobody has the automatic right to be happy, we can't all be famous, successful, rich or in the media.

Not meant to be harsh just pragmatic.  Love your music x


I’m so confused I just feel blank all the time like I have no emotions and sometimes when I’m in class or something I just space out and just feel secluded from the world like I’m just an onlooker I’m just soo confused idk anymore honestly I just have been feeling like what’s the point of life anymore


when you were starting to think that maybe you were making up your undiagnosed anxiety but then you watched this and started crying and then had an anxiety attack because you had to see people in like two minutes and you needed to stop crying so they wouldn't see you cry and then she got to the part where she was saying to get help and it got worse because you really need to get help and you think maybe you can actually say it this time but you're not home and you don't feel safe telling the people with you about this and it's not okay ☺

this is a perfect video though and i love it and im thankful because i think when i get home im going to actually tell someone about it which ive been trying to work myself up to doing and this gave me kind of a big realization that i should stop putting it off


this title just describes everything that's been messed up in my life recently :/


Yo you'll feel good after a good cry, go ahead

+ekeetley123 it's fine. I know how some people can be online. Not nice tbh. X

+Claire Spencer i know what you mean. it's like your pain is locked inside of you and you can't let it out

The thing that really sucks is when your body won't let you cry

+Abigail Faith sorry if it came off as rude somehow; it wasn't intended to. Thanks for not going bat shit crazy at me x

+HeyHolly'sOnline read my essay of a comment and get back to me on that one :( you've completely mistaken an innocent correction.

+ekeetley123 well.... Okay I'll spell her name with one d instead of two next time. Thanks for correcting me. However, I feel like you're the one who made a slightly larger thing out of something small 😜 have a nice day

+HeyHolly'sOnline what...? I'm simply saying her name is spelled dodie...such a genuine comment, saying you love someone, should start with spelling their name correctly. That's all... :) please try not to get worked up over a tiny thing.

+ekeetley123 oh my god get off my comment

+doddlevloggle oh doddie.... We love you so. <br>I'm here if you ever need to talk. I relate so much, panic attacks, depression, ect.... So I know how you feel. And crying definitely makes me feel better. Cry it out dear ❤

+doddlevloggle oh doddie.... We love you so.
I'm here if you ever need to talk. I relate so much, panic attacks, depression, ect.... So I know how you feel. And crying definitely makes me feel better. Cry it out dear ❤

+doddlevloggle holy moly you replied, I told my mum and she was like aw that's so nice

Yo but like just do it haha honestly I feel like so relieved after a good cry, it's like you've just cried all the bad shit outta your body ygm


Im watching this for the fourth time in two days now


I never comment much personal things but she is so sweet and she expresses it in a way that is accurate and gentle because of the ducking stigma. But I notice many people commenting that they feel like they're watching a movie when they go through depersonalization-derealization episodes and I felt like writing what I feel. I feel like I'm in a simulation. Like a group of creatures or aliens are watching me and nothing is real like Doddle said she felt like a robot and everyone else was human I feel the exact opposite and it's really scary since I can't feel safe anywhere, not even home. Home seems unreal and everything seems so geometrical and the colors are bright in an overwhelming way. It feels as if every object in the room is staring at you. With difficulty breathing I feel cornered and uncomfortable anywhere. You know how some used to think that monsters hide under our beds? And therefore they avoid the floor when going to bed-falling asleep? (Does that make sense) I feel scared of every single surface. I feel unsafe sitting on the ground, the furniture, standing up, I feel like everything's gonna swallow me into a strange dimension that's full of weird and dangerous things, a place from which I can never go back. <br>WOOOP THATS ENOUGH OVERSHARING FOR TODAY IDK IF ANYONE WILL READ THIS WHOLE THING BUT if you've felt this way before know that you're not alone. I know it all seems weird and out of place at times but when the physical feels unreliable, focus on what your soul truly feels. Don't listen to your head. Focus on what your soul is thinking and follow those thoughts because they're the purest we have and even if you feel that you're dying, your soul is always going to shine a light. Some believe that after your body decays your essence shines in the night sky as a star. I'm glad some understand; I maybe will delete this because it's long and whatever but please try to understand if you haven't gone through this. This is not for attention seeking. It's an extremely scary and confusing situation and I'm glad Doddle did a video about this. Stay alive everyone

I never comment much personal things but she is so sweet and she expresses it in a way that is accurate and gentle because of the ducking stigma. But I notice many people commenting that they feel like they're watching a movie when they go through depersonalization-derealization episodes and I felt like writing what I feel. I feel like I'm in a simulation. Like a group of creatures or aliens are watching me and nothing is real like Doddle said she felt like a robot and everyone else was human I feel the exact opposite and it's really scary since I can't feel safe anywhere, not even home. Home seems unreal and everything seems so geometrical and the colors are bright in an overwhelming way. It feels as if every object in the room is staring at you. With difficulty breathing I feel cornered and uncomfortable anywhere. You know how some used to think that monsters hide under our beds? And therefore they avoid the floor when going to bed-falling asleep? (Does that make sense) I feel scared of every single surface. I feel unsafe sitting on the ground, the furniture, standing up, I feel like everything's gonna swallow me into a strange dimension that's full of weird and dangerous things, a place from which I can never go back.
WOOOP THATS ENOUGH OVERSHARING FOR TODAY IDK IF ANYONE WILL READ THIS WHOLE THING BUT if you've felt this way before know that you're not alone. I know it all seems weird and out of place at times but when the physical feels unreliable, focus on what your soul truly feels. Don't listen to your head. Focus on what your soul is thinking and follow those thoughts because they're the purest we have and even if you feel that you're dying, your soul is always going to shine a light. Some believe that after your body decays your essence shines in the night sky as a star. I'm glad some understand; I maybe will delete this because it's long and whatever but please try to understand if you haven't gone through this. This is not for attention seeking. It's an extremely scary and confusing situation and I'm glad Doddle did a video about this. Stay alive everyone


I have had this almost all the time for a year... It really fucking sucks :(


It feels like the you from july 2016 is exactly like I am right now. Pretty scary how much you looked alike...


I got diagnosed with all of the 3 AHAHAHHHAH


Two days good two days Bad and every now and again i have weeks where i only sleep and weeks where i just dont because of Paranoia. But its good. Getting better. I have a Routine. I dont et that many random mood swings anymore. I think i'll make it. I know you will too.

Btw. Be careful with alcohol. I sometimes Accidentally self medicate. Be aware of the reason why you're doing something.


I'm 16 and people say I act 8 ._.<br>I put on a mask and they like me better. A lot of people hate my personality. IAM better of being the quiet kid at school... ;-;

I'm 16 and people say I act 8 ._.
I put on a mask and they like me better. A lot of people hate my personality. IAM better of being the quiet kid at school... ;-;


I'm scared I'm under 18 and Its been a year that I have been " obsessing " over depression about a year ago I just wanted to read about it I just enjoyed learning about mental illnesses as I find them interesting but I can't get out of it ( wow I just said that ) I have re visited this video and the part where Dodie talks about how it's easy and dangerous to fall into it if you read the symptoms has really scared me...I don't want depression but I can't help crying every day and being " down " I can't help always smiling when I'm around people even though I know I look retarded and fake I don't know what to do because I'm worried I might have fallen but I don't know if I really have...I re watch and watch videos about depression and read articles  about it I do this to anxiety, dp, dr, adhd.... But there's something with depression that has made me take all the tests read all the articles and continuously obsess about for a year I hope this may just be a phase and I will get over it

depression is usually a most commonly caused be a chemical imbalance in your brain. It's also hereditary. I wouldn't worry too much about it. if you've been feeling down, you may just be going through a phase. That being said it's important you see a doctor so they can perform a medical examination on you because it is an illness and does require medical examination. As much as I'm for self-dx, I do think it's important that if you have the chance/opportunity to see a doctor, to contact them. There could be an underlying physical condition for why you feel this way or you may me misdiagnosing! Good luck dear ❤

I have a friend with the same problem. The only way she got better to seeking help. Please seek treatment for it because you deserve to feel better

Man oh man Ive done the exact same thing.😢

this is incredibly reassuring because it's the only thing that I can find close to what I'm feeling. though I doubt anyone will read this, I'm still going to let it out. I feel like I'm getting addicted to the idea of depression. I don't believe that I'm sad enough or have crossed the bridge of depression yet, I'm sad and I injoy things less and I have trouble remembering but it doesn't seem like enough to self diagnosis myself. but I'm so obsessed by the idea of it, it's something so intriguing that I know is horrible for me and I should feel grateful for being ok but there's something so inticing about having the label and the feeling. I do belive that there have been days where I've gotten a taste of depression if anything, and though they pained me, after it was all done I wanted it back. I intend on figuring this out, and hopefully getting rid of this possible addiction.

EvieJo Brown these feelings dont come from looking up mental illness. you just always (not knowingly if course) had these feelings. But now that you know what to look out for, you start finding them in yourself. dodie said in a different video "if you check you will find. So I stopped checking".

Same.. i feel so stupid and don't want to tell anyone that I only got these feelings when I started to learn about them because that means that i'm only making it up doesn't it? IDK BECAUSE I'M THE ONE MAKING IT UP and what? There aren't any suicidal thoughts or panic attacks just really weird and down feeling moments, mostly at night and idk if I have to take that seriously? Probably sounds stupid bye what

Jade Nanarjain you're beautiful and perfect the way you are, I hope everything works out for you, please message me if you need someone to talk to, you've got this :)

I always used to watch (still do) documentairies on youtube, there were also a couple on eating disorders and depression. Now, I've had the same as Dodie said, I thought my depression was insignificant and I was making it up, because my parents never say the word depression in relation to me. So, watching these documentairies made me even more sad and depressed. Almost exactly a year ago I started developing anorexia (omg I gues I have it) and just like Dodie and you I started to obsess more and more, watchig the four documentairies I knew of everyday, sometimes multiple times a day. It was in my head almost litterally from the moment I woke up till the moment I went to sleep. I even had dreams about eating something and feeling very guilty and me family leaving me behind.<br>Anyway, I've been rambling for too long, when I lost a significant amount of weight (bmi was 14.5) my mom too me to a psychotherapist and she thought I was getting better because I was gaining weight but in fact it's way worse now, so we're now waiting until we can get my intake at an eating disorder unit. Meanwhile I'm desperately trying to lose weight so I can feel I have control for a little longer, until they take it from me.

I always used to watch (still do) documentairies on youtube, there were also a couple on eating disorders and depression. Now, I've had the same as Dodie said, I thought my depression was insignificant and I was making it up, because my parents never say the word depression in relation to me. So, watching these documentairies made me even more sad and depressed. Almost exactly a year ago I started developing anorexia (omg I gues I have it) and just like Dodie and you I started to obsess more and more, watchig the four documentairies I knew of everyday, sometimes multiple times a day. It was in my head almost litterally from the moment I woke up till the moment I went to sleep. I even had dreams about eating something and feeling very guilty and me family leaving me behind.
Anyway, I've been rambling for too long, when I lost a significant amount of weight (bmi was 14.5) my mom too me to a psychotherapist and she thought I was getting better because I was gaining weight but in fact it's way worse now, so we're now waiting until we can get my intake at an eating disorder unit. Meanwhile I'm desperately trying to lose weight so I can feel I have control for a little longer, until they take it from me.

EvieJo Brown I have a similar issue only it's with angxiety.


I find anxiety worse than the depression. But that's me ..


Hey. I feel horrible today. Nothing works. I can't function. I don't feel anything. For clarification, I believe I have depression, anxiety, and adhd. Quite the trifecta. Depression makes you numb, adhd makes you overactive, and anxiety makes you worry about everything. On top of all of that, panic attacks are fun.
I don't really talk to people, not really, so it's weird that I'm spilling my metaphorical guts to strangers. I'm going through the motions. Defintely, definitely not okay.
I want to be a singer, and a musician, and in acting. I don't know how to talk to people. I don't know how to get out of bed, and part of me wonders if I even want that anymore.
I don't know if there's anything else I should say? Don't reply with bullshit, I guess. Don't want to hear, "I've been sad/stressed too". Bye.


omigod I just
when she starts nearly crying I just
I can't
I hate that this all hurts you so much darling and i know it's been a while now and idk I hope you feel better than this because that sucks and i care about you a lot and so do so many people and I never want you to feel like that ever again but that's not the reality idk.


Hey I’m glad I’m not the only one .<br>. :( but this makes me so mad 😠

Hey I’m glad I’m not the only one .
. :( but this makes me so mad 😠


The description said "the mental breakdown tag" and all I thought was "it's the mental breakdown! <b>dodododooooo</b> "

The description said "the mental breakdown tag" and all I thought was "it's the mental breakdown! *dodododooooo* "


Same here ,and it hurts so bad , please if you get any treatment let me know ,I know I might not get any reply but please


Gosh, Dodie. I know you don't believe in God, and I know you'll probably scoff at this comment, but my heart is aching for you. Jesus saved my life, okay. I was going to kill myself. I was depressed and I still struggle with depression daily. I hated myself. I had bad social anxiety and panic attacks. I felt detached, like you. Like I was on drugs or something. I felt like a ghost just sort of floating around observing the world but not really being a part of it. I would look up and see the world moving in fast motion. I thought my vision was starting to fail; my eyes were all blurry and I thought I needed glasses. I couldn't sleep, and when I could I was restless. But, Dodie, I mean, Jesus turned my whole life around. I was raised Christian but didn't really have a strong personal faith. But when I found that; when I gave in to God and let Him show me Himself, I just saw Him in everything. He was right there with me the whole time I was suffering. He was holding me and waiting for me.

Wow. This is not the reaction I expected. This is awesome! I should have known the people who would comment under one of Dodie's videos would be so nice :') This is all so encouraging.

I'm not religious but happy that people like you can find a way through mental illnesses with God, real or not there is no doubt that God does bring a lot of good to the world through lives such as your own :)

+Nikkayyy God I think is helping me through my times of trouble. I think he works through my friends especially because they are there for me and I just feel so comforted when they look out for me. Also, my church is great and our teen 'Sunday school' (basically drinking tea and coffee while eating cake or French patisserie stuff from the co op) is so inspiring and it's convincing me I have things to live for.

+Mikkayyy I can totally relate. My soul doesn't feel broken anymore. While my body still suffers from anxiety and tiredness, my soul feels differently. It's definitely frustrating sometimes when I am calm on the inside and my body decides to panic! But it makes a world of difference that I know in the deepest place of my heart that I am truly safe and loved. Not that my soul cant get hurt - it can- but I have an assurance that the supreme power (God) wants nothing for me but to see me live a whole, meaningful, fulfilled life.

Yes!! So glad there are more Christians like me who dealt with mental illness. Jesus really does save. Praying for you, and Dodie!

Waiting for me to come to Him so He could heal me. And I found so much peace and so much comfort. His yoke is easy and His burden is light. I have no idea what you think of God apart from that you don't believe in Him or Jesus, and you probably think Christians are judge mental and horrible and whatever (sorry about that by the way, Jesus is nothing like Westboro Baptist, I promise). But I'm not trying to convert you or judge you. I'm just hurting for you. And Jesus is healing my hurt everyday. I'm sorry if you hate me for this. I just like you a lot.


every time you start crying i start crying


I haven’t been diagnosed but me and me therapist talked and we think I might have dpdr :/


theres something magnetic about your personality...


The dovan part ah, I think both dodie and Evan feel at home with each other? Evan describes her as an angel and dodie seems herself when with Evan idk but ah


,my situation is that when i was 17 yr old i complete my high school from Boston in us and then i decide to go to college but recently i got a call from hospital that my family-dad, mom and a brother are died in car accident ,now i see no hope, i feel to kill myself i have no friend im ugly and stupid ,i cry every night but still  trying to improve myself


So why the claps?  I've seen this now on several depression videos.  Is it a way to snap out of it?  Please let me know, thanks!

Yes it kind of helps u get into reality again because if you begin to talk you feel kind of fake


Derealization is horrible, and so, so, so, scary. I have a history with it myself - though i'm so lucky that it's usually just in short bursts, lasting only a day, or a night, or at worst a couple days. I can't imagine what it would have felt like to be in that constantly. Gosh.


I know this video is old and people won't probably read it... but if you stumble over this, please do.
I was 13. I felt big and mature, no one understood me. I guess I was just stressed, but it felt different at the time. I self diagnosed, anxiety, (then started going to therapy). I had my fucking life sorted out, and I spent six months that I'll never get back pushing people outside my life with whom I'll probably never have the same relationship again. Looking back, I could've sorted it out in a month or two, alone.
I said that was hard. It had been the hardest time of my life, but now I was so much stronger and wiser, I had suffered enough. My life was going to be happy from now on.

It's been ten months since I made that statement. I would give up everything just to feel that way again. It scares me to think that I might just be doing the same, making things up where there's none, and that this will get worse and worse each day. I'm two levels deeper than I was back then, and I know bloody well that when this ends, I won't have suffered enough. I still have decades left.
My point here is, don't be me. Try to not adopt this as your signature. It wasn't only until I told myself that no one would fight this monster for me that I started trying to beat it. I know it's hard, I know it consumes you, I know. Just, please, don't make it yours. Don't wait until it's too late.


Going through this having no fucking idea what it is, is so scary


WOOO!!! One millions views!!!

Did I actually watch this video? Nope!

Excitement nonetheless!!!


ok this is so weird and idk if this is depersonalization or disacociation or something but when im hanging out with my friends sometimes..i become really aware of the situation and it's like im there but not there at the same time?? idk if that makes any sense at all.. probably not


I can't deal with real life anymore. I'm so tried and I go through so much shit and I feel so fucking dead. I walk into my school looking like a zombie because I don't know how to process my emotions anymore. Should I show the real, over-thinking, crying me? or should I smile and giggle and laugh and stay at the verge of tears every day? So many people say, "others have it worse than you!!!1!!" I am fully aware,  I'm not asking for this shit. I hate waking up and dealing with my thoughts. They are constantly digging at my mind. I try so hard to be happy and I can't do it. I can't go to therapy because my family is some of what is causing  me to be this way and I can't tell them that. I don't know how to explain what I'm feeling, Its just... Sad and being tired of being sad. fuck.

Ruby Johnson I feel this exact same way 💔😣

Diana5513 do you think that all the councillors/psychologists/therapists helped you? If so, which was the best? Ik u probably won't see this but I really hope u do

I've seen different therapists, counsellors, and psychologists over the last 5 and a half years. Let me tell you this. I don't know how the fuck I would have gotten through university had I not started seeing one. I was finally diagnosed with depression, anxiety, OCD, and ADHD, at 18. I am 23 now and I am still seeing a therapist. I am only learning now at my age that the reason we feel overwhelmed and like life is too much to deal with is because we obsess over finding reasons as to why we feel depressed and/or anxious instead of just letting ourselves feel the way we feel. I cannot stress how true that is. I have only recently learned to let myself be upset when I am upset (usually not in front of people because I hate getting emotional at all to begin with), because by fighting how you are really feeling, you are making yourself feel worse! You don't need to tell your family that they are a part of what is causing you stress (until you are ready), but I would definitely suggest you see a therapist/counsellor. You are 100% not alone in feeling like shit and being sad. Believe it or not though, it does get better with time and a lot of help.


i think i am depressed i can't talk about it because my family are all jolly and happy and they won't understand things like this.


At 6:00

Me: SHUT UP YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING. EVEN IF WE SHUT UP, IT DOESN'T CHANGE ANYTHING WE'RE STILL JUST A blob of sadness and empty space.

Blank Midnight    I was gonna say some bullshit thing, but whatever. If you want to talk, I'm here I guess


I feel the same.. I’m 13 I feel like I can see feel hear etc but I’m not there I feel like I’m watching tv. I feel like I am not real


I never understood how terrible this is having (depression and anxiety mixed) when I  was young but now I’m 16 and ever since last year I’ve gained a lot of weight and now I’m constantly doubting, bullying, and isolating myself and I want it to stop but it won’t I go to sleep one night with slim hope that tomorrow will be better but its always the same I’m so terrified because it’s not Changing I feel so dreadful all the time that I’m terrified I’ll end up ending my own life because it’s so bad and I can’t take it I don’t wanna die

I just wanna finally feel alive


i feel like i don't know who i am anymore? like I'm not real and i'm not here and quite honestly i can't take this feeling anymore ffs


I wish i could figure it out. Mental heath, I mean. I don’t know how I feel or who I am, and when I’m not around others, I don’t know who I am. I just kind of.. feel.. nothing. Well, I can feel emotions, but from a third person, I guess? But I don’t even know if that’s it. I don’t know. I don’t know who I am, or could be. I can’t cry. I can’t really smile for myself. It’s all for someone else. I’m only really here, on this planet, for others, and when they don’t need me, I just kind of float off.
I’ll also feel worthless and feed off of belief. I take any compliments or support and hoard it, trying to use it to fill the hole of where my self love should be. Does that make any sense? I don’t know if anything makes sense anymore, so I think it’ll do.
I also don’t know how or when or what to talk about what I’m feeling. I’m under 13 (I don’t want to state my age) so no one would take me seriously. I desperately want to come out as pansexual and say that I have mental heath problems, but I don’t.. I can’t. If I ever do figure out how to tell people, they would tell me to decide when I’m older. But I don’t know how long I can keep my mental heath problems tamed.
Thank you, if you read this, for listening to me. You can do it. I believe in you! Stay strong. ♥


fucking hell dodie I'm crying so much I know exactly how you feel all I want is my old happy little bed and my old happy little life and my old happy little me

@Harvey Doniego ahahahahahaha impressive

Would you say you want your own happy little pill

@SnowAline Hate all you like but this is equal to Narcissism anyone with any integrity or courage would go about things in a private and dignified way. I don't trust people  who make videos about their every waking moment.Thanks for reading.

@Mysterywhiteboy78
 I really hope that you realise that the things you just said are very rude. I have no intention to hate on you but if Katy suffers of depression, anxiety or depersonalisation, it is something very normal to miss the old times, where the mental illness wasn't there (or hadn't shown up totally). Mental illnesses can be very hard and challenging, both mentally and physically and me myself have wished to go back in time just to forget. This isn't about "special snowflakes" or something, these things are legit side-effects of these three mental illnesses. She isn't ruining society, she is just describing her feelings, that are totally legitimate.
Why do you hate on someone and tell them to grow up, even though you don't know their age? You say that the things she feels are dumb although they are totally understandable. Instead of spreading hate, please think about what you have done and think before you speak.
Even though you were rude, I wish you a lovely day and a nice week. Thank you for reading this.

+Katy Hinken Please go seek help if you haven't already ❤ Although I don't know you, I really want you to get better! I believe in you 😘

but anyway you're handling this so well so that's one gold star for you


Sorry if this is to personal,  but do you think you got depersonalization because of youre manipulative relationship?   Also I l o v e you sooo much and I hope everything is ok now


they said I'm an attention seeker, my problem isn't that big, those words just put me down, they don't understand how it feels


It sounds like the early stages of a spiritual awakening to me.


I'm just in the beggining of the video watching you reading the txt you send to your friend, and this is basicly wath I'm passing thru, and wath I said to my best friend almost every day .-.


Can someone please help me! I have derealization (same thing as Dodie) but, I'm only thirteen so aren't as many treatment options. I'm using a vape pen made by a company called corked and it helps with the symptoms but, it won't go away. I need help, advice, something please.


I think I want to see someone about this, however I don’t want to get labelled with depression and then make this effect my future chances of getting a job etc, can anyone help me with this?


I just need to vent for a moment.<br>I can't deal with anything anymore. I just always worry about what is going to happen after every choice I make. I don't feel like I can be myself around anyone and I just feel like crying but I can't because everyone judges me and every action I make. I feel like I am always second best or worse I feel like I will never be as good as anyone else. I feel stupid and childish admiring these feelings as I know people (including my friends) have experienced worse and that I am just overreacting or overthinking. but of course no one who I have told believes me and tells me I'm just doing it for attention but sometimes I do want attention and I know it's selfish but no one focuses on me anymore, my sister is always with her boyfriend and is never at home and my parents have struggles with their jobs and relationship and I just want to be someone's priority but I'm not and I can't changing because I feel like I am attention seeking. rant carried on below||

I just need to vent for a moment.
I can't deal with anything anymore. I just always worry about what is going to happen after every choice I make. I don't feel like I can be myself around anyone and I just feel like crying but I can't because everyone judges me and every action I make. I feel like I am always second best or worse I feel like I will never be as good as anyone else. I feel stupid and childish admiring these feelings as I know people (including my friends) have experienced worse and that I am just overreacting or overthinking. but of course no one who I have told believes me and tells me I'm just doing it for attention but sometimes I do want attention and I know it's selfish but no one focuses on me anymore, my sister is always with her boyfriend and is never at home and my parents have struggles with their jobs and relationship and I just want to be someone's priority but I'm not and I can't changing because I feel like I am attention seeking. rant carried on below||

+Cocaine Aleks i have stared online therapy as feel like if i carry on like i am i will do something that will hurt people or i will regret. thank you for recommending that because i wouldn't have done it myself because id believe i was overdramatising it 💛

Caitlin Amber Ok I used to be in your exact situation and I did attempt suicide and at that point I though I had to see a therapist and it helped so much! Please, please see a therapist before something terrible happens 💛

it has gotten to a point where I have self harmed and I can't go to therapy because I can't bring myself to admit this or do anything anymore


It's like your on acid or weed without doing<br>It.

It's like your on acid or weed without doing
It.


I just wanna give her a hug and cry with her

It's sad for me not just because of a feeling of empathy, but I know exactly what she means :/


i feel like I'm in a first person video game


depersonalization or puberty? I have no idea... (not dodie, me)


When I get sad I think I get depersonalisation but I'm not gonna bet on it anyway when I get sad I feel as if I'm not inside my body like I'm walking along next to it and my body looks lifeless and I get really lonely and like I want to hide and cry idk someone helo


Oh I remember you from TV and you just popped up when I searched depersonalization


I get the opposite of this kinda? Like reality suddenly feels <b>very</b> real and intense and it's terrifying I just can't ignore that everything is like .real. and I can touch things and feel things and move and stuff and it feels horrible? And I'm just so scared and the worst is when it happens in band because I can't play my instrument properly and I feel like my hands aren't mine and my mouth and body isn't connected to my brain and I just see everyone else around me doing things and i force myself to do the same but I feel like they're gonna notice that inside I'm freaking out and I'm just faking knowing how to play an instrument? It's awful but idk what it is???

I get the opposite of this kinda? Like reality suddenly feels *very* real and intense and it's terrifying I just can't ignore that everything is like .real. and I can touch things and feel things and move and stuff and it feels horrible? And I'm just so scared and the worst is when it happens in band because I can't play my instrument properly and I feel like my hands aren't mine and my mouth and body isn't connected to my brain and I just see everyone else around me doing things and i force myself to do the same but I feel like they're gonna notice that inside I'm freaking out and I'm just faking knowing how to play an instrument? It's awful but idk what it is???


I have super bad anxiety and depression from being verbally abused my ENTIRE life. And everything judt fucking sucks


Don’t worry about crying just cry if you got to


I have Depression, I hate my therapist because they r always putting me down by saying that I will never make music, so I should stop making music and stop following my dreams

I'm not an expert on what the best treatment option is, but I know that negative influences are NOT what you should be around when you're feeling "blah".  When I'm feeling sad or anxious or angry, I confide in some of my best friends because they understand. And thus, I recommend talking to close friends about it until you can find a much better therapist 💛

if you don't like your therapist, you should find a new one. there's nothing wrong with finding a new therapist if you don't trust yours. many people go through 2 or 3 until they find the right one

Switch therapists! Most have a different approach, view, advice and such. If you can't get along with yours or don't find their advice helpfull, you can look for someone else. It happens ALL THE TIME, don't worry they will be mad or anything.

hey! how about F**K what the therapists say, if you love something, then do it! don't ever doubt yourself!! you''l be ok, someday you will look back at your past and be glad you went through it, because pain and suffering creates a truer Human Bieng :)

(ich hoff, es stört dich nicht, wenn ich auf deutsch zurückschreibe(sry, hab dich gestalkt, um zu schauen, ob du eigene musik auf deinem kanal hast) <br>hör bitte niemals damit auf, deinen träumen zu folgen! wenn musik etwas ist, das dir gut tut, dann mache musik! vielleicht hast du die möglichkeit, einen anderen therapeuten aufzusuchen, der nicht solchen unsinn erzählt?

(ich hoff, es stört dich nicht, wenn ich auf deutsch zurückschreibe(sry, hab dich gestalkt, um zu schauen, ob du eigene musik auf deinem kanal hast)
hör bitte niemals damit auf, deinen träumen zu folgen! wenn musik etwas ist, das dir gut tut, dann mache musik! vielleicht hast du die möglichkeit, einen anderen therapeuten aufzusuchen, der nicht solchen unsinn erzählt?


Please tell me if anyone feels the same . I think i am alone feeling this way.
 (What i feel is i am not alive it's like i dont exist. When i feel i dont exist it's a sad sigh that i dont care anything. When i am severaly hurt by someone or something i feel even happy by a childish thinking i am not even alive. During middle of gossip and  talk i  feel like i am not talkin or it's feel unreal. Even sometimes i have to hit myself just to be sure that it's not dream it's reality. When it rains or every phenomena i feel like it's unreal. Everything around me feels it's unreal. Most importantly i feel I AM IN FRONT OF GOD and he is showing me the deeds i did on earth  and  i am SEEING ALL MY LIFE (even now too commenting) IN A BIG TV. Means i feel i don't exist )
  Only pains, hardships,cuts, bruises and love are making me feel Alive. I personally i i don't exist at all and the world around me is fake and WHAT I AM DOING NOW is writing a comment and this too i am seeing myself in a tv (from different dimensions )


I can relate, depression, anxiety and mental illness are very real. If you get the chance come see my vid, if not then I pray you have a happy life, sending you hugs and happy, healing vibes :)


Dodie your mad......but all the best people are 🙂😉

+Caitlin Morgan I was just quoting Alice in wonderland because I thought of it when she called herself mad

ik you meant this in a positive way but being "mad" isn't the same as being mentally ill


I'm mentally stuck. I obsess and obsess and obsess. I need help to stop obsessing.


My heart longs for you O child
My heart aches for you
My heart reaches out to you
My heart is hungry for you
My heart is waiting for you
My heart is patient for you
My heart is crying out....
I know your pain
I have felt pain
I have been through agony
I know your despair
I have lived it
I have been rejected and hated
I know the love you need
Open the door my child
And let Me come in
Receive Me
And let Me love you
I will love you like no other
      -The Lord Jesus Christ


What you need to do is buy your old family home and remodel it. Make it your own and do most of the work yourself. Make it your own ( Sanctuary)


someone plz help me<br>i've recently been feeling all worried out of nowhere or out of breath, out of place and insecure. i mean i let the good times roll and shit, but inside i'll be anxious looking for a purpose, what do i have then?

someone plz help me
i've recently been feeling all worried out of nowhere or out of breath, out of place and insecure. i mean i let the good times roll and shit, but inside i'll be anxious looking for a purpose, what do i have then?

and i kind of feel like I'm unoriginal and can't have an opinion because i agree with everything but just the thought of going to a psychologist makes me feel embarassed and an edgy tumblr girl

melodramaticfool its been a few months and that feeling kind of vanished, but i still feel like when im not screaming at my friends i feel like nothing bUT i'm not a psychologist and if i go to one i'll probably feel like an attention seeker,, I'm really hoping it's just a phase and i don't wanna diagnose myself ~~ but thanks for the comment <3

I have anxiety and I'm kinda like that but idk

If you still have that condition, go to a doctor if you haven't already. I don't think some app or random people in the comment section (no offense) are qualified to diagnose you or even advise you on how to cure it.

Elisa Palacios I feel the same.. I asked my dad if he thinks I might have anxiety and he said that its probably a phase, but I cant stop thinking about it and Im scared..

@Jewel Bass hiya! so so glad i'm able to help. I don't think anxiety is something that can completely go away either, but we can push through :D <3 lots of love (and calming vibes) from melbs!

Natasha Hertanto I'd like to thank you for suggesting the Headspace app. I read your comment about a month or so back when my anxiety was really bad, and decided to try the app. My anxiety isn't completely gone, and I don't think it ever will be, but the app has been teaching me how to deal with panic attacks and unneeded anxiety. Again, thank you for suggesting this app to them, it had really helped me.(:

@Audrey Metcalf they literally helped me escape out of that hell

try this app called headspace. it's been helping me lots with anxiety :) also, see a psychologist if you can. it's a bit of a stressful process but totally worth it when you find someone who gets you, who's compatible.

Ana Palacios sounds like a panic attack pet 🌸 they always pass - hope your okay ❤


she's not 10/10 is she 6/10? (this isn't a joke this is legit is that the right connection?)

But Is It Dodie Yellow Tho? Like your name.

6/10 is about feeling average, not feeling anything special, negatively or positively

Crazy Tootsie the fuck is he talking about “right connection” who said she was a 10/10? What’s that got to do with a video about mental health anyway

i dont think so? 6/10 means average, you're not really important, just another person etc etc. I think thats what the song's about (i know you commented 9 months ago sorry lol)


Baby you need something to make you make money and be happy. Also getting a dog could help.💗


Feeling like this after tapering my ssri.i feel insace and i feel lime i want to die.it has been a week.

Zornica, How are you now? It usually takes 2-3 months time to taper off SSRI as the brain takes time to adjust. Consult your physician.  In life there are only 2 problems—mind and the body. To feel better reduce negative thoughts and overthinking.  Your breathing is closely related to the brain [mind] and gives good relief from stress-anxiety.   To relax sit on a chair or lie down, neck straight,  eyes closed  and observe the sensations of your incoming-<del>outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils  for  5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. With daily practice the mind will relax.  No deep breathing needed. Observe your breath sensations when you experience multiple thoughts anywhere-anytime-</del> before sleep, in college, before sleep, in the kitchen, when reading, etc. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a better life. Reduce negative social media, take morning sunlight walks  and avoid constipation as it affects the mind instantly. Best wishes--Counsellor.

Zornica, How are you now? It usually takes 2-3 months time to taper off SSRI as the brain takes time to adjust. Consult your physician.  In life there are only 2 problems—mind and the body. To feel better reduce negative thoughts and overthinking.  Your breathing is closely related to the brain [mind] and gives good relief from stress-anxiety.   To relax sit on a chair or lie down, neck straight,  eyes closed  and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils  for  5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. With daily practice the mind will relax.  No deep breathing needed. Observe your breath sensations when you experience multiple thoughts anywhere-anytime-- before sleep, in college, before sleep, in the kitchen, when reading, etc. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a better life. Reduce negative social media, take morning sunlight walks  and avoid constipation as it affects the mind instantly. Best wishes--Counsellor.


You said you dug your self in a grove. Here's your ladder

|-Your viewers-|
|-Your family-|
|-Your friends-|
|-Your future-|
|-Your UKULELE!-|
|-Your music -|
|-God (ik you don't believe)-|

They will help you get up!


Could you add captions to this video please?


1:16 broke my heart. I know that this is and old vid but. Yeah.


had this for a while and it’s fucking hard


How to you keep functioning with this... I am so stuck... I've lost my job. I'm failing my college classes and I'm just so stuck nothing helps there is no reasons to do anything anymore... I'm a burden and a leech. I  am sitting in my room and the walls are bending away from me and I'm not sure if my room mate is actually real most of the time I feel as if everything is floating away from me and every outside sound is so so deafening... the posters on my all are vibrating and  many little flies coming through the air I don't know to do Im so scared and so alone here

Hey, I don't have any experience with what you're going through (though I am depressed and know what it's like when your own mind becomes your enemy) but I just wanted to say that you're not alone. It might not be much but I genuinely hope you'll feel better soon. You're strong because you still want to fight and I hope you're able to be proud of that. Hold on. It will get better.

Lots of love🌻❤🤗

(English is not my native language)


The title of this video is just me in a couple of words tbh


I know this is completely unrelevant; i did watch the video and take in what dodie said, but where is her shirt from?? Does anyone know? Thank you.


I kept pushing everything down and now im empty


+Hallieisntbritish nerdfighters! I think this should be done everywhere, everywhere I see it comments are so much more positive!


Have you heard of Ayahuasca? A trip to Peru can cure all of your issues. Look into it 👍


I hate feeling depersonalization. I have anxiety and depression but I had to take a medicine and that was a side effect. It was so so so so terrifying. It only happened once but it's like depression and anxiety mixed into one and I hate it so much. You feel like you are scared of dying but you aren't there. I hate it so much.

there's a whole anxiety attack in my brain but only i see the world inside my mind and nobody gets to see me cause I am not with the world

scrolling fast through my tumblr distracting me from my mind and world so fast that the posts don't even load just begging not to go insane while not wanting to think or live

I'm only alive in my head but I'm not even alive there but somehow there's a whole world and I sit in my head my whole life I'm dizzy and not me

hearing dodie talk makes me realize that I'm not really here and notice nothing things are weird I'm not here you are living with an alien everything i do is an illusion my parents never had me I'm going insane this isn't normal I'm not panicking but i am but panicking is all in my head and I can't do this because I'm not here

it makes you feel crazy. I'm not really me or here

I hate depersonalization so much. It's like anxiety and depression mixed in to create something terrible and it makes you feel like you can't do anything because you are losing touch with you.


rewatching this 8 months later and you've come so far from this point I'm so happy for you dodie x


I love the "I'm going to laugh that I'm a bit mental!" I love her! I always joke about my disorder. Even though it's clearly not funny.. but eh I've got to make humor with it! <3


Thank you for making this video. I have dealt with both anxiety and depression on and off for over 10 years and  I have recently started traveling continuously and making youtube videos. It has brought out my anxious side quite intensely. To hear you speak so honestly about your experience is helpful. i have been grappling with incorporating it into my videos, not sure if it would be a good idea. Because of course so many people say "no one wants to listen to a Debbie Downer" But I think there is more to it than that. And being able to see you has shown me that it's not about being a downer, and that's not how you are at all. It's showing others that you are human and on a level opening the door for them to feel okay with not being okay too.


After struggling with depersonalization for three years at such a young age, it's comforting to see other people com out and talk about their experiences with it.


This video spoke straight into my soul. I think it was really good for me to hear this. So thank you, very much.


These text you sent to your friends is exactly how I am feeling right now! thanks for sharing and allowing me to feel less alone and giving me hope that I will feel normal again!


Thank you so much for putting everything into words!!! I was diagnosed last year with dp/dr, it took more than two years for me to figure out what it was and in that time I messed up my exams and came out with awful grades. I have a great family but I could never talk to them about it because they didn't understand, so this video really helps me feel valid and real, I love you!!


I'm going through the same thing right now, and I've started going to a therapy and I'm starting to take medicine! I'm glad to know that there are many other people who feel the same way i do.


Hey dodie,
thank you so much for sharing your thoughts ♡
Love from Germany


Oh my GOD i am so glad I found this video. This is exactly what I've been feeling for 3 years and I  thought I was crazy and have been too afraid to say anything


Honestly one of the most helpful things I've watched, thank you so much. You're super inspiring and make me feel like I'm not crazy haha thank you dodie xx


Oh, I wish I found this last year when I was suffering from depression. I feel like you're describing a state in which I was before for so long. Watching this was still really helpful because I can see that I'm not alone and what I felt was real and not just a thing that I made up in my head. Apart from anxiety I also suffered from eating disorder and sleep deprivation. I also tried to get back to normal but communicating with my family didn't help (only made it worse). My home where I had spent most of my happy childhood (I'm 22) changed in a way that there are constant shoots and shelling near the village I used to live in. (I'm from Ukraine). So even when I come back there everything is different now. Anyway I try to be better, eat healthier, work out, do yoga. Thank you so much, Dodie, for this video. ♥♥♥


This video helped me so much, I was going through a really rough day today and this video really pulled me to reality, I too feel like same way that you do, thank you.


this actually helped so much, I'm just discovering DP because I was looking for an explanation to what I'm experiencing and its helpful to know that I'm not just going crazy and that these feelings are an actual thing


I get depersonalized in bed sometimes, and I always have. It also happens at parties a lot. Thank you for being so open. 💛


thank you so much for this video. it's helping so much because currently I feel the same way, and I can finally use this to explain how I feel to other people. all of us love you so much and I cried a bit when you were trying not to cry❤ gonna go get myself a therapist. we're all in this together, always. sending hugs xxx


You explained how I am feeling perfectly. I've had this off and on for the past 5 years and it is the scariest and most uncomfortable thing I've ever experienced. The hardest part for me is socializing it's always hard for me to speak or get my thoughts out and when I do talk it feels so disconnected almost like I can't control how the words sound when they come out. I slur my words like I am drunk or loose my train of thought and just start trailing off..... You will be ok though it comes and goes.


Just stumbled upon this video and I can totally relate and think it's great to speak about mental health with such a large audience. I have had panic attacks, GAD and any other mood disorder and as part of depersonalization I experienced was thinking no one is real. You're right bout talking, if I get anxious I can I will literally start a conversation to anyone.


Hey lovely ❤
Just stumbled on your channel and loved your singing then came across this video.
Thank you for sharing your struggle, it's an extremely hard thing to do something so publically and it takes a very strong person to do so when they're already down.
I've struggled and still do occasionally struggle with anxiety and depression myself and I can certainly empathize with all of those feelings.
I hope you are in a much better place now and I wish you all the best for recovery and happiness ❤ xxxx


Thank you dodie.
 Im 16 years old and I dont really remember when it started, but ever since , i've just constantly tried to normalise it and dismiss it. I've liked to think that everybody thinks this way and maybe they're better at coping. Until this video, i didnt think it was real.  Its  weird cause i knew it was ' real' but i also had convinced myself it wasnt.!?  anyway, i have been a mess for a pretty long time and I did'nt even acknowledge that , until i realised i was crying amidst watching your video..
Thank you so much for this dodie. Thank you. I love you Dodie.


This made me cry n smile and omg so many emotions. I completely understand all of this omg you literally just voiced all my thoughts on the subject of mental illnesses ah. I have anorexia n also deal with a bit of anxiety and depression as a result of that. Last year when I was in the real depths n worst parts (mentally) of my illness I remember just repeating to myself in my fits of tears and distress that I was 'crazy' and I needed to die and I was a horrible person etc. I was just falling to pieces inside and I could not see how anything could ever be ok, how everyone was just going about their life when I was barely living. I've got help now and I'm well on the way to recovery and hearing about you being so determined to get help n not giving up just made me so so happy! I love your videos so much they're so cute n relatable and make me smile and cry and laugh and ah❤ don't stop being you xx


Thank you for making me realise that I was indeed dealing with depression and was not making this up, overthinking or "not normal". I hope you will get better and build your home in the time you live in (if this even make sens, I am tring to translate my french in english meh).


this made me cry so much, i never realised how much i could relate to this and now im sad. people have always said that im just exaggerating things so i convinced myself that i was and that just made it worse. thank you Dodie, for making me realise im not the only one


Omg dodie I really hope you see this. When u first uploaded this video I was struggling with my own derealisation depersonalisation and god I just know how difficult it is. I've tried so much to stop it but one thing that I think is sort of helping is to just forget. <br>Wake up one morning and tell yourself "today I am not going to think about how spaced out I am" distract yourself the whole day, work, talk to friends etc and don't give yourself a moment to panic or think "oh god I'm not here" slowly, it becomes a habit and you will forget about it. I'm not going to say there aren't moments I think I'm alone or not alive, that I've made myself up and around me but just forget. I think this works for me because my dp/dr is anxiety induced and my brain sort of shut itselves down because I was so stressed all the time. It's difficult at the beginning but right now I'm telling you I feel like I'm here. I feel like I'm on planet earth and I exist and my friends exist and my mum and dad exist too. I hope you're okay and also that you get referred to that doctor in London for the pills <33

Omg dodie I really hope you see this. When u first uploaded this video I was struggling with my own derealisation depersonalisation and god I just know how difficult it is. I've tried so much to stop it but one thing that I think is sort of helping is to just forget.
Wake up one morning and tell yourself "today I am not going to think about how spaced out I am" distract yourself the whole day, work, talk to friends etc and don't give yourself a moment to panic or think "oh god I'm not here" slowly, it becomes a habit and you will forget about it. I'm not going to say there aren't moments I think I'm alone or not alive, that I've made myself up and around me but just forget. I think this works for me because my dp/dr is anxiety induced and my brain sort of shut itselves down because I was so stressed all the time. It's difficult at the beginning but right now I'm telling you I feel like I'm here. I feel like I'm on planet earth and I exist and my friends exist and my mum and dad exist too. I hope you're okay and also that you get referred to that doctor in London for the pills <33


everything you said in this video i relate to and happens to me too. thank you for making me feel less alone.


this video literally relates to everything going on with me right now, excluding some other things. however this is not something you should feel alone about because i previously stated that i felt the same, your not alone.

especially you guys in the comments with me, we have each other and each experience is validated and life is not something to fear constantly, sometimes it can manifest itself into something beautiful :)


Dodie, thank you. You made me feel like I'm not alone. I can relate to everything said in this video and it almost made me cry happy tears knowing that someone knows how I feel. I'm sorry that you have to go through this too, but maybe we can go thought this together?? Also if you have anytips, please help. Xxx thanks


This is how i feel all the time. It feels so good that i'm not crazy and that someone else also has this feeling.


I have suffered from all of the above for years, and I finally forced myself to seek help, and I can honestly say it was one of the best decisions of my life so far. I tried different medications and started seeing a therapist. I started meds for anxiety instead of depression and I can really see a difference. Everyone always says it gets better,  and I can finally agree. If you are scared or unsure about whether or not you should try and find help, please, please, please take a shot in the dark and ask for help until you get it.


I feel the same way as you. It's really hard to get out of the house because I have socal/ death anxiety and depression. Therapist are very benifical and it helps me to talk about what I'm thinking about, even if it is  ridiculous and crazy thoughts.


I got depersonalisation last year and found out when I had an anxiety attack on Christmas Day at 4am I could sleep and for the rest of that week I couldn't accept I was real but I never knew it was so common and I'm so happy I found this video because I understand her


When I first watched this video, I was just interested in what you had to say. I never thought that a few months later I would feel pretty similar. I started getting spaced out and I just couldn't concentrate. I felt like I was in a dream and everything was the same but my perception of it was not. The more people I am around the more I felt sick and confused, I just forget simple things. I am glad that I am not just going crazy and that I can relate to others after finding out about derealisation.


I really am thankful I experience derealisation only when I'm really depressed, in a really dark place and that doesn't happen too often now. I'm getting more and more healthy and I'm really proud of that. I get what you feel, it's some scary shit. I'm a psychology student, 3rd year of uni and it's even scarier to see what you feel on those classroom boards. I hate it with all my heart because of the panic that it won't ever come back to normal. Because you wake up and you feel like you're high and still dreaming but you're not dreaming and know it. I hate that everything is so weirdly looking and that it just feels floaty and absurd. I hate that everyone is going to think I'm weird and crazy on my way to uni. I hate that even I feel crazy. And finally, I hate that my own brain can go through the day without any problem and the next day, throw some vicious shit at me. Thank you for that video Dodie. It's not my first time watching it, i find comfort seeing I'm not crazy and other people have that too. It will get better. It's been three months now since it last happened and I hope it stays that way. Much love. C -


thanks for making me feel okay and making me realize it is okay not to be happy all the time and that my emotions are valid


I understand this aw and you explained it all pretty well like I haven't heard someone describe something so close to what I have experienced


That was great!  I think you did a really great job here.  Evidently 44, 342 other people also think so :) You come across as very genuine, funny, quirky, honest, and open.  Which can be difficult to do.  So nice one.  Keep up the great work.  Hope your depression is getting better.  Your plan sounds like an excellent one :)  Oh, good job on the editing too :)


You inspire me so much 😭because you make such beautiful music and also struggle with so many things I do too. And you make me feel like I can have success, and like I exist, because you exist and you're getting success. ❤


I don't know you, I haven't even watched a lot of your videos. But I wish I could give you the biggest hug ever, and let you know that I understand. Depersonalisation is the scariest thing I've ever experienced. It does get better though. It comes back every now and then when things get stressful, but better it does get. 💜


thank you dodie. thank you . so much. im 16 and i domt really remember when it started, but ever since , ive just constantly tried to normalise it and diamiss it. ive liked to think that everybody thinks this way and maybe theyre better at coping. until this video, i didnt even know this was real. its so weird cause i knew it was real' but i also had convinced myself it wasnt.  anyway, i have been a mess for a veryyy long time. and ive not even acknowledged that until i atarted cryig midst watchung your <br>video.. thank you so much for this dodie. i love you.

thank you dodie. thank you . so much. im 16 and i domt really remember when it started, but ever since , ive just constantly tried to normalise it and diamiss it. ive liked to think that everybody thinks this way and maybe theyre better at coping. until this video, i didnt even know this was real. its so weird cause i knew it was real' but i also had convinced myself it wasnt.  anyway, i have been a mess for a veryyy long time. and ive not even acknowledged that until i atarted cryig midst watchung your
video.. thank you so much for this dodie. i love you.


I've had depersonalisation since I was 12 or so, it's been 13 years now. By now it has gotten to a point that 98% of the time I have really forgotten that I have it. I still have it but I have learned how to cope with it, I'm doing good, I finished school, got my B.Sc, made a lot of friends, now I'm travelling in Australia. Honestly, I think in a way it has made it easier for me to do things like travelling and making friends because for some time before that my anxiety was so crippling, I think DP is kind of like a shield from my anxiety but the side effect of numbing anxiety is that it also numbs other things and makes me disoriented and confused and forgetful at times. All the feeling of not knowing how to talk to people or dizziness and bright lights is so familiar. Sometimes when I happen t think about it all I long for "feeling real" again, it has happened only about 4-5 time since and for only very brief periods of time, like few hours and then it goes away but it has been really special and magical when I can feel everything and actually feel comfortable again. I hope I can feel more of it, and maybe one day I will feel real again for real, but I really don't even know if I am ready for it, sometimes I think I can't handle the world right now without it.

The bright lights and feeling drunk and not knowing how to talk part will get better as you get used to it. I hope you don't have to deal with it as long to get used to of course. What I have found for me what makes it better is when I suddenly feel really comfortable or safe somewhere, some little thing or thought makes me feel safe and then I would feel more real again.

Like this one time I saw an old couple with cheesy t-shirts they had bought from travelling Norway and they looked happy and I thought I would like to live in Norway in a village and be an old person with grey hair and just live and be there, happy with a cute house and go be a tourist and see pretty things. I would be retired already and not have to think about what to do with my life and how to be somebody and be successful and how make my peers like me. I felt a glimpse of simpler life that took a lot of pressure off and then I felt weird somehow, wanted to get away from people, then I sat outside and suddenly looked at my feet and they actually looked like my feet this time, and I started to feel more and more real and normal. It was so weird and I actually enjoyed existing every moment and felt every moment. Maybe I should try to somehow trigger this reaction more but life gets in the way and somehow it's really hard to deal with it. Sorry, I'm not sounding too positive or anything, but I just want to say that it's possible to live with it and be ok and also that it can feel normal again, even if for short period of time.


7:58 This. I understand that it's important not to misdiagnose someone. But it frustrates me that so many teenagers are being left untreated because people - including professionals - ignore mental health problems in adolescents because they think teenagers are "just making it up". Had Dodie been given better support at 17, perhaps things would not have gotten so out of hand. I genuinely think this is one of the most important reasons we need to reduce the stigma and devote more to mental health research.


+doddlevloggle you are strong and brave for posting this! I'm curious to know how you're doing with everything now and if you ended up going to therapy, if you found that it's helped significantly?

I just recently experienced depersonalization and it's the strangest feeling of just not being alive or yourself. The weirdest things trigger it and it's not super common so most people have no idea what you're talking about.

My depersonalization came about after I smoked some pot which I did to try to suppress the empathy I felt after 2 of my close friends lost very important people in their lives. I've always had strange reactions to marijuana and usually it gets to a  point where I just want to "wake up" from the high feeling.

I went to bed and never "woke up" Though I feel like a totally different person than I have the past few weeks, I'm not completely back to "me" yet. It's gotten much better after doing these things...

1. Realize that you are alive. You have a purpose. There are people that truly love and need you.

2. Try to remember things that bring you back to life. Mine were thinking of memories of things that I've experienced. I have a dog, so making sure that I'm taking care of his needs.

3. Being around people I love and trust helped bring me back a lot. Even though I don't think they fully understand what I'm going through, they were there for me and have loved me through it. I reached out to people when I was feeling off. Which is ok to do <3

4. I found outlets to let go of things that were weighing me down that I hadn't fully dealt with yet (a breakup, sexual assault, death). I wrote blog posts, songs and painted pictures. I did this to release these horrible stressful things that have been in the back of my mind just eating away.

Know that this feeling doesn't last forever and that it can get better <3


Well, it may have sounded weird. But I can relate. Had and having same things at the moment. Glad to see that I'm not alone, and see you fighting


this video actually saved my life. thank you thank you a million times over. gotta ask though, do you actually know how this depersonalization disorder come about? did you just wake up one day completely aware that nothing is normal anymore or did something induce it?


hey thanks for this video. i was feeling shitty because i also suffer from this but now i feel like I'm not alone lol


I create scripts out of text messages and conversations I have about the mind and how my mind works (because the way my brain functions is weird) so to see you do this is really relatable and honestly, I'm 20 seconds in and this is already my favourite video of yours, dodie x <br>I really do wish you well in the future Xx

I create scripts out of text messages and conversations I have about the mind and how my mind works (because the way my brain functions is weird) so to see you do this is really relatable and honestly, I'm 20 seconds in and this is already my favourite video of yours, dodie x
I really do wish you well in the future Xx


I've felt this way for a while. Like I'll think when I'm hearing myself talk it's someone else talking, as in it's not coming from me. My brain will feel weird cloudy and muddy and I feel like I can't open my eyes at all.


I am extremely happy that you made this video, because I started watching it and I was mind blown of what you friends are feeling. And you have made me come to realize that I have depersonalization, my depersonalization was triggered by smoking pot. And It was an after affect on smoking, but it's not. And I am just thankful that I came across your video because without it i wouldn't know where to start looking for a cure. ❤❤

I thought I was what your friends we're lol


I'm 16 and I have had these derealization feelings for a long ass time and it just really hit me hard recently and it feels like I'm watching a movie that I don't want to watch but something is forcing me to and I feel a little happier that I'm not alone 👍👍


Wow I can completely relate to this 100% I thought I was going insane .. Two things that have helped me immensely was the book 'hope and help for your nerves' by Claire Weekes and secondly magnesium supplement - if I don't take it I start to feel breathless and weird again.. The gut is the second brain so one of the best things is getting allergy testing done .. Also of course therapy helps but I've found its a combination of things over time which help recovery .. I know what it feels like to feel like you'll never feel normal again


I know this is an older video but just wanted to say I also experience anxiety depression and depersonalization. You are not alone and you have lots of people who want to help you .


i have been diagnosed with so many mental illnesses i lose track of them sometimes...and i related to this video so much because everything you said was something that has or had crossed my mind and i've spent so many hours reading articles and stories online and being like "yes that's me i am that too" and then there's the fear of "oh do i really feel like this, do i really have this? or is this all in my head?" to the point that you just cry because these obsessions are all you have. thank you for making this video, if i could sit and talk with anyone in the whole world, it would be you because i feel like you would understand where people usually don't, but just...thank you for feeling like a friend...if that makes any sense? thank you for talking about these things, it's so nice to hear such real struggles from someone i admire so much


I feel ya Dodie, I visited my old primary school the other day, and while it wasn't abandoned or overgrown, it was certainly an experience. The classrooms had been gutted and completely made over. Buildings had been removed and new ones put in their place. Gardens had been trimmed and replanted and destroyed, trees had been chopped and sawed and turned into firewood. My favourite toilet block was bolted up and collecting dust behind some tires. It was so strange and painful


sometimes, whenever I look in the mirror, i get these intense feelings of not being the person I see in the mirror. it doesn't happen very often, but it freaks me out every time


Thanks for sharing this.😀 It was brave of you.  And helpful 😊 take care  love x Brian


everytime I discover a new youtuber I always end up watching their saddest videos and I always relate so much and I always end up crying


Hello Doddie! Being an anxieus person, how do you handle all the exposure you have? Twitter, youtube, instagram, facebook, it must be hard to handle.


I started crying when dodie almost started crying. It makes me so sad to see people like this, even though sometimes I am like this.


very courageous to have did this Doddie, I relate to this too much


I relate so much to the feeling that you described at the beginning oh wow


Am I seeing some dermatillomania on your chest area? (I've had it since 2011) Also I love your attitude, I mean the fact that you're determined to find a cure. You will find it because you seem like a clever girl (you know how to describe and analyze your feelings impressively) but I have to warn you that it's not going to be easy. Sometimes you'll want to give up trying, but don't. When you overcome this problem you will feel (and be) the strongest and happiest person alive. You will appreciate life a lot more.I believe in you. Much respect .


I watched this video a few months ago and I just watched it and thought nothing of it. I just watched your cutting ties video again today because I think I need to stay away from a very close friend of mine that I have strong feelings for and it suggested this one again and this is exactly how I feel. Sometimes I feel like I'm watching a movie staring everyone I know and love, I feel things but I sometimes feel like I'm not controlling my own body and thinking the things that I'm saying and that there's another person in my head and we think two different things but the other person has control of my body.


i suffer from derealization and depersonalization. every so often. and the last time was at my camp and I remember walking around and talking to people without knowing what I was saying. and being around people and not knowing to do. I remember Looking down at my walking feet and wondering whose legs these belonged too.


This happened to me last May.  I couldn't stop crying and thought I was going crazy. Nothing felt the same after that. I still feel odd. But not near as much as last May. I always think about it. Can't stop everyday. I still laugh and sometimes when I forget about it I feel normal again. I'm obsessing over it. And sometimes I get depressed. But my main fear is the major anxiety. I got this major anxiety, and couldn't stop crying. I'm too scared to search for therapy because then I start crying again. I hate talking about it. But I know it will help. I want it to go away. It's been almost a year. I don't want to worry my parents because of all the shit going on. And the only escape from t is the internet. I feel normal on it, watching videos, on Instagram but know I can't function without it. I'm scared.


Dodies voice when she said 'my old bed in my old room' made me cry and I can't stop


I've had persistent symptoms of depersonalization and derealization for 8 yrs now. At times I get really anxious when I'm really depressed. Everything is foggy. especially at night time


I've come back to this video because today I sort of felt like this. Whenever something exciting is happening (today is my birthday and I'm going on a big trip in a few days) I always feel super weird and I'm not sure if this is the same thing or not. I just felt really hazy and off today. Is this different?


Hiya, I don't think I've watched anything that I can relate to so much!! I'm a DPD sufferer myself and for my final major project at uni I'm making a documentary on this because it's so confusing and I'm trying to raise awareness and make people understand. Would you be able to have a little chat with me over Skype do you think? This would be sooo helpful and you're super engaging. Let me know, Ellie :)


It has been months now, its stressing me out. Not as much as the first few months i got panic attacks back then just from how overwhelming the feeling of dr/dp, now i still deal with it but im kind of used to it. Hopefully everything will get better for all of us soon. Knowing im not the only one dealing with things like this calms me down.


I started feeling this way over a year ago.  I went to a party and it was the first time I was properly drunk.  For a whole week afterwards, I felt like everything was a dream.  This has happened roughly once a month since.  It's a feeling like your asleep permanently.  I start doubting things are real; I might be speaking to a friend and I convince myself that I am imagining them.  The colours are too bright, the sounds are too loud.  My voice doesn't sound like me.  The only way I manage is if I sleep, because then I can drown in the darkness.  Because that's what it feels like; you're floating through life, barely holding yourself above the water.  It's a struggle to even communicate with people.  I've lost friends who didn't understand my sudden change in personality.  I was at a meal with my boyfriends family and to just pretend I was okay was draining.  When I do sleep, I can let myself fall down.  But when I sleep, I have these vivid dreams which are exhausting in themselves, so I wake up feeling like I haven't slept.  I've been to the hospital multiple times.  They thought it was Lupus.  And then a brain tumour.  Now I've been diagnosed with confusional migraines.  I've been on various medications which haven't worked.  Until I saw this video, Dodie, I had never heard of depersonalisation.  But you described something that until now I've struggled to describe.


i only know a small bit of what you are feeling, but I LOVE YOU! and i'm sorry you go through this!!!


I know just how you feel :( I love how Real and wonderful and amazing and beautiful you are. <3 and I Love your top!