i have been stuck in this dream world for about a year now and i have depersonalization/derealization disorder. it is so scary and terrifying and idk when ill be ok if ever. I hope that you find a way to get through it and that youre doing ok.


I can even explain how wonderful it is to know that I'm not the only person suffering from derealisation! Obviously it's the suckiest thing to have, but I legit thought I was the only one! I never feel like I'm here, I never feel like I can have a nice time, and I feel so bad about it at the same time! My mum took me to New York last year, and I felt so bad as I never felt like I was there! She'd spent so much money to get us there, and I completely fucked it up😞


I told my parents that I wanted to see a therapist for my anxiety and depression before they worsened, and they understood the anxiety part, but said that I was not depressed. My dad told me that I am happiest kid he has ever met and that I am and never will be depressed. He never had depression or ever needed a therapist so clearly he does not understand that I act all happy and say that I feel okay but when I go in my room and don't come out for hours or never, I am crying or having panic attacks or both. I am frantically trying to find anything to make me happy and it kills me because my dad can't comprehend that someone may seem happy but is actually the exact opposite


I'm not sure what your views are on spirituality, but seeing an intuitive/getting a few readings made an immense difference on understanding what was going on in my head and why, whether it is stuff left over from past lives, or if you're super unrooted/not grounded in your body. I feel/felt the same way, for as long as i can remember i've dealt with how you're feeling, depression, social anxiety, identity crisis etc... anyway, just offering a different perspective that maybe you haven't thought of? Sending you good vibes angel <3 you'll be just fine.


I was wondering if anyone has any ideas about how I could talk to my mum about my mental health when I've been faking a smile for so long and she won't believe me. My councillor and friends both think I should go to the doctor but I cannot persuade her and it's just so hard and frustrating.


I totally understand how you feel during school its anxiety anxiety and some more anxiety. But I don't know what to do and I think I will take your advice. Thanks


you shouldn't have to feel like you have to fight back tears just because you are making a video
we will accept whoever you are no matter how you portray yourself online
(unless you do something actually bad)


I play the ukulele and have been a fan of your videos since a friend showed me one of your covers. I have had anxiety for as long as i can remember leading to depersonalization the last few years and honestly felt like nobody else in the world could ever feel this strange. However this is a thank you for being so inspiring and as rare as it is to relate to something like this, it's relieving. Maybe one day depersonalization will not take a toll on me, it's just a goal to work towards now though.


Here, I'll toss my depression into this mess of a comments section.

Okay, so pretty much all of my friends (all as in, like, 4) have some form of depression or anxiety. I've always felt a little weird, though, because when they would go to each other for counseling, they would help each other out. If I came to them for counseling or they came to me, neither could help each other. We'd try our best, but it never really clicked. I ended up going to a therapist, still am, but I just felt a little...I dunno, lonely. I started getting that feeling that what I had was invalid and like it was wrong. Like they had worse depression than me, and that I was making it up in my head to fit it with them.

But recently, VERY recently, like the past few weeks, I stumbled across a little game called Night In The Woods. May have heard of it. The main character felt the exact same way I always did - this kind of sadness Dodie explains, where everything is "Just shapes," as the main character describes it. God, I am so happy I found that game. All the comments of those videos were saying that they felt the same as the character. And now I just watched this video. I wish I had found all of these videos sooner. It makes me feel like, you know, this is real. Like I'm actually feeling these things, it's not just something I made up.

I did NOT intend for this to be this long. Thanks for reading me ramble. Yalls is not alone.


When I'm in my depersonalized state I don't really feel any emotions. I know I might be sad but I don't FEEL sad. I also can't focus on anything and my thoughts drive me insane.


I kind of feel the same things, and I've tried to talk to my parents about it, but they don't really listen if that makes sense? They just told me to "not think about it" and that it was all in my head, and I have no idea what to do anymore about it. I've tried telling them I need to go to therapy, and they just push it off. It's just terrifying for me :(


It broke my heart when Dodie was trying not to cry


You are so brave. I relate to you too much.


I cannot stress enough how incredibly insulting it can be for a professional to tell you what they think is wrong with you, rather than listening to what you have to say. I had to go to a few interviews with psychologists over the past weeks and the amount of times they asked leading questions, made uncertain links to do with pointless emotional memories that they brought up or even worse focusing on things you said claiming they're issues rather than focusing on what you think are your personal issues surprised me EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. I went in believing i had some sort of obsessive compulsive thought processing that LEAD me to become depressed over time (even talking about my depression doesn't help it just results in me thinking even more about it and concluding on an even lower note) and instead of helping me with this they just made the presumption of "I'm depressed" their response was "you sometimes have trouble sleeping so we're going to give you this antidepressants that sedate you so you can sleep better" they looked at the symptom and how to prevent that rather than the cause of the issue and how it can be resolved. I can wholeheartedly say that i'm finding the NHS more stressing than beneficial. Sorry, I don't really have anyone to talk to about this and i needed to rant.


I can't believe it? I finally realized that this is why I don't feel normal. Iv'e been living my life out the way you would expect what society thinks 'normal' people live their life. Iv'e been feeling emotions but I haven't every day is foggy and blurry and confusing. I can't exactly describe it. At first I wonder if its just me being me or if that mean voice in my head came back to say something bad to me, but instead of the voice speaking to me it just watches. Watches my life with me. I have conversations with my friends and almost completely forget what we talked about a couple seconds later. Sometimes I feel like every laugh is forced, or I don't even think its me who was laughing.

When I try to explain this to my friends they all say "Oh you're just sad. It's okay. You'll feel better later!" and I believe them. Everything makes me happy but it doesn't. I tell myself "Cutting your hair will fix it!" so I get my hair cut short. It doesn't help. I'll say "Invite friends over!" And I do. It wont help. Sometimes I feel like I walk out of this state and I actually feel like me again but as soon as I run into something that saddens or angers me it goes right back to me watching my life happen.

I probably explained this terribly but I tried...


I honestly think I'm too much like you. This video is just me in a nutshell, I constantly feel like this but I get way too many panic attacks and I see things. It started when I was 10 and my friend died..which sucked

I'm going to therapy but I don't know if it'll help. Plus the fact that I'm afraid of my own home (dad).

All I want to do is to go back to when I was 9 and happy and watching Hercules everyday and playing super Mario galaxy with my neighbor 24/7. But I can't. I'm older, my family wants me to not watch Hercules, my wii is broken, and my neighbor barely talks to me. I've told my friends and the only one that didn't basically say I was going insane lives hours away from me

I want to fix it. I want to fight it but I don't know how please send help


I never really understood what depersonalisation was and i just kinda experienced it without thinking much of it and then i realized that not everyone felt that way and now im in therapy because i cant feel like myself and i cant talk to people and i forgot how to talk to my friends


hello. i don't know where else to go because i'm scared and i asked my mum about it and she kinda just shrugged. i looked it up and still don't know really how to fix it. i woke up with a cold this morning. it felt like someone was holding my mouth and nose shut. so i got up, had and anxiety attack, breathed deeply for about 2 minutes, and immediately felt as though i were dreaming. i have dealt with depersonalization before, but not as freaky as this. i've found that if it having fun in a situation i'll think to myself, "i feel like i'm dreaming!" and then it REALLY does. like i feel dazed and dizzy, the day goes by much faster than it was before, and it feels like i'm recalling a memory much more than living my life. if you have any ideas as to what to do please please PLEASE help.


I tried to explain why I think I may have depersonalization to my friend bc I have the same thing where you feel like your in a dream and I can't make connections with people bc I feel this way. But all she said was "stop pretending that you have a mental problem. We all feel crazy sometimes. You're fine." Ok I understand that all of us occasionally feel overwhelmed or tired but I feel like this ALL THE TIME. I feel like I should get help but idk how to tell my family bc I've tried before and they were like "you just need more sleep" so yeah. This was unnecessary but I just thought I'd get it off my chest


Very relatable. I'm sorry you have to go through this too.


keep looking back at this video cause its so true and im in the middel of this


I know how it feels, i don't know how to fix myself, i feel broken


HOW I COPE WITH DR/DP:
- I tell myself, "I THINK THEREFORE I AM", "I DIDN'T DIE"
- I wear an elastic around my wrist and snap it, feel the pain
- I am not alone
- I am on medication
- feel textures, smells, tastes
- try not to focus on it, keep busy
- keep away from caffeine, alcohol, drugs
- focus on name brands
- call friends
HOPE THIS HELPS MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS.

HOW I COPE WITH DR/DP:
- I tell myself, "I THINK THEREFORE I AM", "I DIDN'T DIE"
- I wear an elastic around my wrist and snap it, feel the pain
- I am not alone
- I am on medication
- feel textures, smells, tastes
- try not to focus on it, keep busy
- keep away from caffeine, alcohol, drugs
- focus on name brands
- call friends
*HOPE THIS HELPS MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS.*


my friend told me she has this so I'm trying to look into it so I can help or or at least realise when its happening so I can sit her down and tell her that its her life etc... so if anyone can tell me some more about it or if you could tell me some tips on how to help her with it when she's going through it that would be great thanks! I know that I can't exactly help her and stop it because its a process and it has to "fade away" ←what she said to me.


that one line where she said that what people are thinking about made me cry. because that is what everyone tells me because I'm "too young"


seeing u talk about this is inspiring ily dodie


I always find some comfort when I find people who understand. I exchange notes with people. I have noticed people who have food and digestive related issues have neurological issues as well. not saying that is always related. One friend has IBS and she is 100% sure that is the cause of her issues. Your gut and your brain are very closely connected. I have to watch what I eat because certain things well set me off. My nephew has certain food allergies that make him crazy.everybody is wired just a little differently. Sometimes its social issues or stress that trips me. Everyday I am discovering new things. why's it so complicated.I just try to grin and bear it. Sometimes i feel like I'm in a movie or I'm dreaming. Sometimes I hallucinate. A whole spectrum.  A fun roller coaster. People who don't have it don't really understand it the same way. It is like trying to explain what it is like to be drunk or stoned to someone who has never been I guess.


I watched this video when it first came out and couldn't relate at all but recently I've changed my life motto and I think this reflects best how I've felt recently because if I try to put it into words I don't think I'll be able to but these are words so take it or leave it... "Do what you want cause life is meaningless anyway" i say it to my friends all the time and follow it by saying that I'm being optimistic but I don't think I am and i don't really know but like idk it just fucking hurts.

And you get up in the morning and you go to bed at night and that's it

Like I feel like everyone's in there own bubbles and mines popped and I'm the only one who can see how meaningless life is


i am going through something so similar right now


I think depersonalisation is like, well it feels like you're different from everyone else like the real reality which there is no reality and I feel like nobody else around me realises the "real reality"


Your plan has been my plan too lol. Since I was a teenager I've had fleeting thoughts of "am I real? is anything real? are we all a matrix or is everything just my imagination?" etc....probably read too much about philosophy.
Anyway, a couple months ago I started seriously thinking I was in (am in) an alternate universe. Like everything is the same, but somehow different. Like even people I interact with on a daily basis just seem kind of off. But any time I bring it up they'll just be like "hmm, interesting". Then I get even more freaked out cause like what else would an alternative version of someone say?? So I figured since I can't think of anything particular I did to start feeling this way I'd just continue acting normal and hope that one day I wake up in the original universe I was in.
I'm pretty resigned to the fact that I'm probably crazy. But I'm glad I'm not the only person that feels like things are weird.
Also I've been diagnosed with panic attacks, so I'm thinking they're totally related.


the beginning of this video was really familiar to me and i'm really glad that you started with that


❤ A book called Anxiety Rebalanced, by Carl Vernon... I recommend xxx


This is quite late, but, I have depersonalization as well.  I'd say I have depression and anxiety but I think those are just symptoms of depersonalization altogether.  I've realized reasons why I have it and I've even found aids for it, not a cure though, which I've come to terms with.  My father is emotionally and verbally abusive and I've always had him on a pedestal; the man I've placed my hope in love and honor in.  He is, was, the one I was supposed to learn how to love and respect from but I've realized, now, that that is something I need to get out of my head.  Depersonalization, for me obviously there are many cases, has become because of his abuse and my childhood full of blaming all the fault on myself.  I don't mean to blame, I'm just coming to terms with it so that my life would seem normal and make my thoughts seem less crazy.  I also have candidiasis so sugar and carbs already negatively affect me physically but they do negatively help DP.  Whenever I eat extremely healthy and work out for at least 20-30 mins a day I feel the best.  I also open my mind to things and my memories of them, telling myself that they are real and I really was doing those things.  I'm slow to make judgements and quick to be calm; I think all these things help significantly and I can't help but to suggest anyone who has DP to try them out as well :)


This really hit home. I'm currently in college studying to be a graphic designer and every single assignment that I do it feels like a robot is doing it. It feels like I'm never truly into my work or truly enjoying it. I don't want to do anything. I always just want to lay down with my eyes closed and block out everything. Everything is so, so, so overwhelming and I feel like I'm just trying to ignore that.


I feel you...i too suffer from depression and with it comes chronic insomnia that just cxrushes me day after day and adds to my already bad mood. It is not nice to not be able to sleep properly.
I tried everything natural, but nothing helped. Then i got hard (And i mean HARD!!!!!) medication and that just makes you feel bad in another way. It is like...taking a sledgehammer to the head each night, so you can sleep.

People usually do not understand how things are, when you are depressed and i have to say, that i am in a "lucky" position, that my mum also suffers from depression, so my parents know how things go, but...
I have seen people being turned down by their parents, because they think depression is some kind of abnormal desease.
Let me tell you one thing:
It is not, allright?

I'd go ahead and say, that 50% of our western society suffers from depressive symptoms, but most don't know it, because they don't understand.
Depression is more than just feel bad...
You don't know rock bottom...i have been there...

Rock bottom isn't the point, where you are sitting in a corner and cry!

Rock bottom is, when you are sitting in a corner and don't cry.
In fact you don't do anything.
You aren't mad anymore, not frustrated, not sad.
You feel...yeah...you don't feel in fact.
Not nothing!
You DON'T feel.
Someone, who was never there cannot understand how it is to NOT feel at all!
It isn't like feeling empty...you just are a mere shadow of the someone you were before and everything has no meaning to you.
At that point and i am not making this up, at that point someone could've killed my parents and it wouldn't trigger a single emotion inside of me.

It presses every! LITTLE! BIT! Of motivation out of you.
You'd be happy, if you'd be able to cry, but i reached a point, where i couldn't even motivate myself to do that.

Also i am eating a lot of unhealthy stuff out of frustration (Which is a very common thing, when you have depression!) and that makes me...well not fat, but i should lose at least 10 Kg.
However it makes me REALLY uncomfortable being in my body. Add that to the depression and you feel even more like shit.

And that is not all of it.
Every day is a fight against yourself losing control.
In my case i also suffer from anxiety and anger management problems.

Anger is a feeling you get, when you are in a situation you don't like, but you can't do a thing about it and i have this situation day by day.
Just people asking for a favour is enough to trigger me and then comes anxiety...

WHAT! A! B!TCH!

You thought depression is bad? OH BOY, think again!
Anxiety is the devil that keeps you in his claws, whispering sweet lies into your ear, telling you, that it is good to stay at home (It is not!) to abandon your friends (IT IS NOT!) to never leave your bed, because there you are safe (IT! IS! NOT!).

All this is just a giant middlefinger up the ass signed by:
YOUR LIFE!

And that is, what keeps me going.
I will show life my middlefinger with all the might i have, by not giving up!

It is a hard war you have to fight, because the crulest enemy you'll face there is yourself.
Trust me when i say:
Uncovering the deepest and darkest things about yourself is scary. I am afraid of myself. I really am, but i have to go through all this shit. No matter what!
In order to accept yourself and feel better, you have to learn, what it means "being yourself" and what makes you...well...you!

I want vengance!

I will make this desease pay!

I will kick its ass, and punch it to hell and back!

I feel you...i too suffer from depression and with it comes chronic insomnia that just cxrushes me day after day and adds to my already bad mood. It is not nice to not be able to sleep properly.
I tried everything natural, but nothing helped. Then i got hard (And i mean HARD!!!!!) medication and that just makes you feel bad in another way. It is like...taking a sledgehammer to the head each night, so you can sleep.

People usually do not understand how things are, when you are depressed and i have to say, that i am in a "lucky" position, that my mum also suffers from depression, so my parents know how things go, but...
I have seen people being turned down by their parents, because they think depression is some kind of abnormal desease.
Let me tell you one thing:
It is not, allright?

I'd go ahead and say, that 50% of our western society suffers from depressive symptoms, but most don't know it, because they don't understand.
Depression is more than just feel bad...
You don't know rock bottom...i have been there...

Rock bottom isn't the point, where you are sitting in a corner and cry!

Rock bottom is, when you are sitting in a corner and don't cry.
In fact you don't do anything.
You aren't mad anymore, not frustrated, not sad.
You feel...yeah...you don't feel in fact.
Not nothing!
You DON'T feel.
Someone, who was never there cannot understand how it is to NOT feel at all!
It isn't like feeling empty...you just are a mere shadow of the someone you were before and everything has no meaning to you.
At that point and i am not making this up, at that point someone could've killed my parents and it wouldn't trigger a single emotion inside of me.

It presses every! LITTLE! BIT! Of motivation out of you.
You'd be happy, if you'd be able to cry, but i reached a point, where i couldn't even motivate myself to do that.

Also i am eating a lot of unhealthy stuff out of frustration (Which is a very common thing, when you have depression!) and that makes me...well not fat, but i should lose at least 10 Kg.
However it makes me REALLY uncomfortable being in my body. Add that to the depression and you feel even more like shit.

And that is not all of it.
Every day is a fight against yourself losing control.
In my case i also suffer from anxiety and anger management problems.

Anger is a feeling you get, when you are in a situation you don't like, but you can't do a thing about it and i have this situation day by day.
Just people asking for a favour is enough to trigger me and then comes anxiety...

*WHAT! A! B!TCH!*

You thought depression is bad? OH BOY, think again!
Anxiety is the devil that keeps you in his claws, whispering sweet lies into your ear, telling you, that it is good to stay at home (It is not!) to abandon your friends (IT IS NOT!) to never leave your bed, because there you are safe (IT! IS! NOT!).

All this is just a giant middlefinger up the ass signed by:
YOUR LIFE!

And that is, what keeps me going.
I will show life my middlefinger with all the might i have, by not giving up!

It is a hard war you have to fight, because the crulest enemy you'll face there is yourself.
Trust me when i say:
Uncovering the deepest and darkest things about yourself is scary. I am afraid of myself. I really am, but i have to go through all this shit. No matter what!
In order to accept yourself and feel better, you have to learn, what it means "being yourself" and what makes you...well...you!

I want vengance!

I will make this desease pay!

I will kick its ass, and punch it to hell and back!

PS: This is very important!
1.) Don't give up, because then: you've lost!
2.) Give yourself a hug!
3.) Treat yourself!
4.) YOU DESERVE IT!
5.) FISTBUMP!

PS: *This is very important!*
1.) Don't give up, because then: you've lost!
2.) Give yourself a hug!
3.) Treat yourself!
4.) *YOU DESERVE IT!*
5.) FISTBUMP!


I really don't know what to do... me and my (officially diagnosed) friends are pretty sure I have pretty bad anxiety and depression and I know I get panic attacks a lot and less so, anxiety attacks.... my only problem is... my mum. My brother has autism which links into anxiety and he gets socially anxious quite  a lot, which I know I do as well, but my mum always disregards it, brushes it aside or invalidate it because 'your brother has it worse than you'. I would go to the doctor but I can't without her knowing and questioning and putting it off and although I'd like to go about it after secondary school, I don't know how to talk about it? As I said, some of my friends are officially diagnosed and they're getting help but I really don't know how to get there as people around them believe and trust that there might be something going on and I've reached a point now where I literally can't go into detail about anything that happens at school in that respect- for example, on Monday we had a fire drill that triggered me to have a panic attack and since I HAVE to tell my mum about it I did but she dismissed it saying 'if it was bad enough the school would have phoned'. On Friday I managed to completely blank out during a french speaking exam where we were in pairs for the whole class and I started to have an anxiety attack. My friend asked if I wanted to let our teacher know and I got so scared she was going to tell my mum and I had no clue what to do so I just ended up bottling it up. The rest of the day carried on and continued to be absolutely horrendous, until I got home and found out my mum wasn't home and I just felt so drained. I didn't have to make sure I looked like I was ok and I could feel tears but I honestly felt so drained by everything and I just lay there on my bed not knowing what to do. I still don't and I don't think I will for quite a while and I just....? I don't know.


Ugh depersonalization is absolute shit. It's always in the back of my mind, it never goes away, and I really just want to feel normal, because I've never known even what that is.


Ahhhh oh no now I know I'm not alone in feeling like this. I constantly feel like I'm dreaming, like everything that happens in the moment is a distant memory, like, I would say something, look down, and when I looked back up it felt like it was a new day. Idk yeh what's wrong with memahhhh


i can totaly relate, and it sucks that i cant even explain how i feel but i know that somethings wrongs with me, and people who never felt some kind of mental illness cant get it.<br>its like u said, i can try to be happy but not at like my whole potential

i can totaly relate, and it sucks that i cant even explain how i feel but i know that somethings wrongs with me, and people who never felt some kind of mental illness cant get it.
its like u said, i can try to be happy but not at like my whole potential


I am feeling the same thing. I can't seem to function in real life. Nothing feels the same than when it did when I had the friends that I did when I was happy. I still have the same friends but they have changed (as in they have gotten more popular than me) and I just feel less than everybody in the world.


"I keep seeing everyone as humans and I am a robot" <br>that broke me

"I keep seeing everyone as humans and I am a robot"
that broke me


I'm a teen at the moment, and I'm going through that sucky phase that's where I'm trying to find out who I am. I don't know anymore, and I feel like everyone would be better without me... I'm not doing self harm, and I'm certainly not suicidal, but life is a biatch


i still struggle with depersonalization and derealization because of my ptsd. depersonalization feels so odd, like everything else is hazy and bright and you're tired and you can't really feel anything in your body like if someone hit you with a truck you wouldn't really feel it, and like you can see yourself but can't connect, like you can talk but it's not really you talking. derealization feels just as weird, like you're seeing the world through a piece of glass and you're cut off from it, like it feels ripply and watering and fake and flat and not real like you're in a cartoon but the world is the cartoon. having them both is so horrid. i hope you are starting to feel better dodie. 💗


i think i feel depersonalization too. like my brain and body are different things and the person i see in the mirror isn't really me. and i'm in a coma or something, nothing feels real and it's terrifying. but i can't do anything about it. there's no medicine or amount of sleep that can fix it


I've been experiencing depersonalization, and I only just discovered it has a name. I thought I was going insane. Whether I'm inside or outside, nothing seems real and everything seems quite hazy, like I'm not really there. I'd take my dog for a walk and just feel completely spaced out. It's terrifying. At one point, I thought my eyesight was going bad, but apparently my vision is fine...it's just THIS. This is what's happening to me and I hate it.

I also experience depression and anxiety, and it's not fun at all. You're a huge inspiration to me, Dodie, I love you <3

When I was a kid, I remember having scary experiences of depersonalization, but in a different way. Nothing was hazy, but I felt like I wasn't a real person. Like I was living in some sort of virtual reality (yes, like a Sim), or that I was some kind of alien/robot solely put here to learn about human life, and try to connect with it, without really being part of it. Yes, I'm aware of how bizarre that sounds and I promise I'm not on drugs, but that's the only way I can really explain it...


I found this video looking for someone who can relate, maybe bigger YouTubers and when I found dodie I was in shock because I only discovered her recently but she can relate. I made a weird depersonalization short film on my channel (kms it was so amateur) so yeeee


It's strange. It's wrong. I can relate 1000000% 💜💚💜💙💜


My comment is probably a bit late considering this video was almost a year ago but I want to encourage anyone who maybe is feeling like something is wrong mentally and like Dodie said some people will try to dismiss what you're feeling and/or thinking. Quite a few years ago my mind was a mess and I felt like I was going insane but because of some of the people around me I didn't ask for help or speak out about how I was feeling at all and I thought I could just repress it and I was able to for awhile. But last year something fell apart in my personal life and everything came back to me and I finally started admitting that I need help. I think it's better to be safe than to be sorry; don't wait until it's too late. (I felt like both of those were a tad too cheesy but I couldn't pick just one). The process of getting better/getting help may be really long and you may meet a lot of people that just think you're making it up but you deserve to be happy and feel good. <3


I have started going through puberty and middle school and everything is changing and I'm having anxiety attacks and I'm scared. I'm just like everyone else, but I've just started bottling up everything and I need help


I can't look in the mirror for too long or think about me as a person for any amount of time without feeling completely disconnected from my body. It makes feel like im having some sort of psychotic break or like im losing my mind and its been happening for too long for me to even remember when it started. It comes to a point where i just sit and cry because i cant make it go away and i cant feel normal or even feel at all. The outer edges of my vision go blurry and i cant do anything but pace my room trying to see things like i did before the feeling arrived. It's so unbelievably terrifying I'd much rather have a regular panic attack and have it over with in 20 minutes than have this constant feeling of distorted reality


This is seriously how I feel at least once a week and it is very scary and sucks. I didn't know this was a problem with other people.


It seems like I've had depersonalization... not anything severe it seems like. I just woke up one day and nothin felt normal. It felt like nothing was happy or interesting in life. My mind was in a fog and I just sat around my home all day watching TV. I looked it up and it is exactly how I felt--- Depersonalization or depersonalisation can consist of a reality or detachment within the self, regarding one's mind or body, or being a detached observer of oneself. Subjects feel they have changed and that the world has become vague, dreamlike, less real, or lacking in significance. It can be a disturbing experience.---<br>I don't remember how long it lasted. It might had only been that one day but it may have been a few days. The days felt so insignificant that I can't remember how long it was :(

It seems like I've had depersonalization... not anything severe it seems like. I just woke up one day and nothin felt normal. It felt like nothing was happy or interesting in life. My mind was in a fog and I just sat around my home all day watching TV. I looked it up and it is exactly how I felt--- Depersonalization or depersonalisation can consist of a reality or detachment within the self, regarding one's mind or body, or being a detached observer of oneself. Subjects feel they have changed and that the world has become vague, dreamlike, less real, or lacking in significance. It can be a disturbing experience.---
I don't remember how long it lasted. It might had only been that one day but it may have been a few days. The days felt so insignificant that I can't remember how long it was :(


I just got diagnosed with all of those today... im on meds now.


i am not diagnosed, but I think I have anxiety disorder. and I can't say I felt depersonalization, but about a week ago, for three days straight I felt really spaced out, and like nothing really mattered. I felt numb. I had to study for an exam and I didn't even realise I wasn't studying. and one day before the exam, it all came to me and I think I had a panic attack. I felt light-headed, and like there was no oxygen. and when it was over, I started crying. It was weird. I felt like myself was put back into my body again.


When she starts to cry I started to cry too. :(


Let me once again post the definition of depersonalizaton for anybody who thinks they have experienced it.----<br>Depersonalization or depersonalisation can consist of a reality or detachment within the self, regarding one's mind or body, or being a detached observer of oneself. Subjects feel they have changed and that the world has become vague, dreamlike, less real, or lacking in significance. It can be a disturbing experience.

Let me once again post the definition of depersonalizaton for anybody who thinks they have experienced it.----
Depersonalization or depersonalisation can consist of a reality or detachment within the self, regarding one's mind or body, or being a detached observer of oneself. Subjects feel they have changed and that the world has become vague, dreamlike, less real, or lacking in significance. It can be a disturbing experience.


whilst watching this i got a mystic messenger notification that said "find a new path that makes you happy" and i feel like that kind of relates to the video haha


I wish I could talk to someone about myself but if I did they'd all get bored and sick of me and stop hanging out with me so I put up a happy facade but its getting bad like I had to sit in a room with the light out during school and just cry it out :(


I really don't know what I have.  I think it's a mixture of Anxiety and Depression, and I have a therapist but it just hurts soooo much that she wont diagnose me. She always says: no what you are experiencing is normal in your age blah blah. But I've talked to a lot of others who are claiming not to have a mental illness and don't feel the way I do. And I've spoken to a lot of others who indeed are diagnosed with depression or anxiety and they are experiencing the same things. And on top of that, my mother has depression and so does my father so there is no doubt I could've inherited it by both or one of them. But urgh. I hate it so mich that she puts of everything I tell her. I hate that now and I hate that since I am child.


I'm 13 and I have extreme anxiety and depression. Everything is like you're falling back on a chair but you never hit the ground or laying in bed crying then staring at the wall for 3 days because you have absolute no motivation at all. Everyone I talk to about it says I'm too young or I'm lazy or I'm over exaggerating. I tell myself I'm getting better but now I'm beginning to realize I'm not.


Is this where 6/10 was from? Did it root from this feeling of yours? I just felt like it did :O OMG


im gunna rant about my feelings and shit because i feel like this is a safe video to do so. well first of all, i feel like I have anxiety. I've not been diagnosed because I don't want to tell my mum to go to the doctors. When I feel anxious my hands start to sweat and shake, I become a complete different person because I can't laugh or even smile, I have a really bad sick feeling in my stomach, I get a headache and my breathing becomes shaky. This lasts until the situation is solved. I feel like this every morning before school. Every night before I sleep instead of thinking positive I think of at least one thing I have to worry about tomorrow. If I can't i'll do it in the morning. I always find something because there always is something. I cry an awful lot and am a sensitive person. When I cry and say to my mum no one likes me and I shouldn't have been born she tells me to grow up like it's something just can grow out of. Like I'm a six year old having a temper tantrum when I'm not, I just want someone to listen to me for once. I self harm slightly. I've never tried with an actual blade, just knives and scissors. I want to try with a sharpener blade but a girl used mine yesterday and never gave it back. I have nothing but scissors. Im so selfish for doing this I know but I can't stop. Then I found out my friend is depressed, self harms properly with razor blades and almost killed herself last year. I always thought I was the only one that had a bad life but now she's told me this for one I feel worthless and not good enough and for two I feel like her life is so much worse that my problems aren't even worth thinking about. I never imagined her as that type of person and it just hit me, I got told she couple of weeks ago and since I've cut a lot more. Pretty much every day I have to. She's doing it more regular now too and I'm trying so hard to stop her but it's not working. I feel like I can't carry on anymore sometimes. But I'm gonna keep trying so stay alive |-/


i don't know if this is anything like what you're going through or it it's just me?? who knows. but i constantly feel like i can't remember anything? like my life is happening and stuff going on around me but after it's happened i can't remember it. it's like i made everything up?? does anyone know what this is or if it even is a thing? i'll be grateful for anything anyone can tell me xxxxxx


sometimes i think i should go to a doctor but then i realize that it's really too expensive for me to go "on a whim" of sorts??


Hi to whoever that is reading this. I think I have a problem with myself but I don't know what exactly that is. I constantly have crying spells and I do keep a journal where I scribble my sad thoughts when I have crying spell in the middle of the night. This month alone I've had 5 crying spells, and I don't know if that's normal. I have existential anxiety and I often worry about not living and stuff like growing up and being closer to death. At night especially, I worry about my parents dying or having to grow old and I feel dreadful because of the fact that everything in the world is impermanent. But also, sometimes I feel okay and when I look back at the nights where I cried and sobbed everything seemed irrational BUT THEN THE NEXT DAY OR NIGHT I WOULD CRY AND BREAKDOWN ALL OVER AGAIN. It's like a perpetual cycle and it has been going on for years now. I genuinely don't know what to do :( Am I okay or have I gone insane? I don't want to go to the extent saying that I am bipolar bcs I don't want to self-diagnose but this whole thing is really bothering me. someone help :(


I went throguh a terrible bout of panic attacks, generalized anxiety, depression, and depersonalization all together..it kinda got better.. now i just get depersonalization sometimes...especially when I'm at the grocery store!  meds made my anxiety so much worse just when i felt like i was getting better. made me feel absolutely insane. it really does change how you look at mental illness...I used to think like that too "i would just fight it". god you said SO many things in this video that made things click with me that i just didn't know how to verbalize. thank you <3 hope you're doing better now I realize now this video is from last summer.


Someone made a comment, it got a lot of likes so you'll probably see it (the poster's name is Melanie C) and I relate to it a lot. I feel constant, constant guilt over thinking that I have anxiety and possibly depression. My brain likes to yell at me, saying that I'm just making everything up and that I don't deserve anything that I own. It likes to say, "Your family is comfortable, you have clothes and food and you can sleep at night, so shut the fuck up and stop pretending."
I had two anxiety attacks, back to back, at the beginning of this school year. My lunch room is super loud and there was a lady using a microphone to tell people to sit down and she doesn't know how to use the microphone (she's practically eating it every time she talks) and she yelled and I just lost it, I started shaking and crying and I couldn't breathe properly and I had to be taken to the bathroom by a friend to calm down. Then I came back and it happened again, and this time I was taken to the nurse. So now I think I have anxiety and I think it's getting worse, but my parents refuse to do anything about it. I think they see therapy as a failure on their part, as they weren't there for me. They really aren't nowadays either, I don't know why they pretend they are.
I'm worried that I'm developing some sort of illness relating to a constant routine or relating to being constantly clean because I've started obsessing over it. I don't have experiences to show it, no freakouts or anxiety attacks. All I have is the disgusting feeling of my skin crawling if my hands aren't washed after using the bathroom or using a school laptop or eating, which eventually crawls down to my stomach and makes me feel sick.
I mentioned earlier that I get extremely guilty about certain things. I'll be lying in bed feeling empty and drained and I'll want to talk to a friend, so I'll pick up my phone and I'll go to my messages and I'll see that I talked earlier in the day and they listened and that'll flip a switch in my head. I mentioned earlier that my brain likes to yell at me. This is what it's the loudest about. Sometimes if it gets too loud and too convincing I'll end up scratching myself, then I'll look at the pink and white lines and I'll hate myself even more. It's a cycle, and I hate it. I hate it so much and I hate myself so much and yet I still don't believe that I need help.

If I go to a therapist with this, they'd laugh me out of the office. I can't dump all of this on my friends. Where can I go? What can I do? Is there anyone else with these problems? Please tell me I'm not alone.


There's no words to describe anxiety and depression, it's painful and confusing and it drives you insane it feels like it's eating you alive like there's a monster eating your insides slowly it's so painful and I wouldn't tell anyone cuase they would say I'm seeking attention or being dramatic they would say awful things that would make me feel worse until I finally told my best friend and sent him the lengthiest text but he said it was okay and that he'll help me, dodie your doing a wonderful job at battling this I'm trying too just remember that no matter how worthless you feel people are still out there for you


im so numb that i can't remember the last time i cried


im 14 and i will say that i have go through hard things since im 5 yrs old my dad and mum divorce, then mum got mental breakdown she was totally diffrent from before our family broke and thyre kinda unique..not a good unique.. my grandma gets alzheimer ,my 1st aunt ego is soo high so we cant ask any help from her and her mouth is just as sharp as sword , hypocritice aunt, sharp tongued gay mean uncle , no father , suicidal cousin live in on house i never happy there it maybe a thing  called house but i dont feel like home i try to be in a reltionship for distracted myself from everything it lasted 8 months with unhealthy relationship, bully then i got myself deep into internet to entertain myself and not talking about how i feel then i got schizophrenia and now my life is all a worthless. youtubers the only one motivates me and theyre the reason i smile so thank you for entertaining us including you dodie<3


this is the earliest ive ever been tbh but dodie ily so much


I really don't know if I have a mental illness but I always feel down and at night I tend to think really scary and "depressing" thoughts I guess you can say. I only want to listen to music or read books that me cry or really sad. I'm always tired and I always want to sleep. my mom has taken me to doctors before and they say that nothing is wrong with me. but I'm not entirely sure they are right. I feel as if there might be something wrong with me but at the same time I feel like if I were to tell this to somebody or even the doctors they would think that I'm just seeking for attention and that I'm faking it. well  idk sorry for ranting. I feel like this is all so insignificant and that my problems are so little that I don't even need to worry about it because there are people with a much worse life then me but like I don't know. I don't know what to do about all of this.


why did i feel broken...after watching this? its just soo sad


Can anyone help me? I'm just 12. And im feeling like this. I feel like im in a dream. I cant control what i do or what i say. I just stay quiet since i cant say something nice. I dont have the energy to play games or do fun things i did. My mom knows i have anxiety but im hiding these anyway. i guess i overthink my future too much that ive became like this. When i look at a mirror i feel like i dont know myself. its just like, a simulation and everything or everyone doesnt exist. i feel like im the only one whos real

@Slime Machine thank you so much. I'll try

I feel the same way. I don’t know how to help though. I need help too.


Don't you think it's a good idea to stay away from alcohol? I'm rooting for ya, Dods!

Sure, but she's being positive about it so theres a start

Mtivation for exercise can be a problem. Particularly if you live alone.

Time... time with yourself and exercise is a helper too =)

+doddlevloggle I really hope u see this & know u helped me so much having mental health issues can be a very lonely dark place as you feel no one understands you, you're weird I want you to know you have shined a light when I needed it most the only way I can describe having depression  it is being in a pitch dark room  no windows you've been spun around so many times and your trying to find the light switch some times it's pitch dark & some times you can see a little light at the door, u were that light for me Thanku xxx

+opuskrokus what u said is so typical of someone who hasn't suffered from mental health problems lucky u honestly  another one is  " youl have to pull yourself together" of course in an ideal world that's exactly what you would do everyone with mental health problems would do if they could & there wouldn't be anyone suffering from experience alcohol can dampen your depression down, for that moment but you pay hell for it next day & sometimes when you are feeling so so low you will do anything not to feel as bad even if it's only for one nite sadly with mental health problem you don't control them they control you, you are at their mercy sadly x

@Julia Corbett I didn't know it, thank you!

+Dook Leeto Logically yes, but logic tends to fly out the window when depressed etc. So the alcohol might help for a second & you might feel worse after, bit for that one second it feels worth it. Of course it's not really but when you're that desperate to feel ok, well yeah. Hope that might kind of explain it?

+Paul Lynch recent tests from where? Alcohol is a depressant.

only amatter of time til someone started to blame their pet peeves.

I think alcohol (like most mind-altering chemicals) largely (and paradoxically) serves to amplify and dull: depression if that's where you're at, or good feelings, or angry feelings, etc. She says "visit my old school friends and have a drink" during an upward-trending day. This implies a) minor to moderate consumption, meaning little risk of extreme results unless predisposed to an inability to control oneself (i.e. alcoholism), and b) a generally pleasant and positive atmosphere. In such a case, bonding is more likely than further spiraling.

This is not an advocacy for alcohol consumption (seriously, it's not a viable coping mechanism), but a caution to those who would demonize it (and those who consume it) out of turn.

Alcohol is a depressant, and apparently causes your brain to become more depressed if you're already depressed. But if you're so tired of feeling the way that you do, then you don't really care so much.

But if you notice it's making things a lot worse- like if it's so hard to get out of bed in the mornings because you're hungover and even more scary sad, or you're doing dangerous things when you're fucked up, or you're drinking like all the time and by yourself - then maybe you want to try to stop. Because it really can make things a lot worse and make it harder to get better. So just watch out for that stuff.

It's all really hard but you can do it Dod's! And you can feel really great again :)

Im just saying its weird to deal with depression with a substance that is known to cause depression.

+Dook Leeto I don't think so, you don't need to have a big reason to deal with depression anyway

but it causes depression in  itself, I have friends who drink because they are depressed, and I ask them why they think they are depressed and they don't know.

+Opuskrokus it's difficult when it gives quick artificial happiness. But yes, definitely! Thank you :)


Sounds like you need people around you so you do not feel alone. If you are away from your dad, mom, and siblings, just call them. Problem is that people cut others off to be independent. This is the result. This seriously looks like a cry for help. Go find a therapist or  your dad.

@FreedomBreeze24 Awesome! It's always great to find someone else interested in this kind of stuff!

@MrSquishedsquashed Wow! Thank you so much for the in depth response! Was such an interesting read, and it makes a lot of sense. I love learning about this kind of stuff too :) I totally get ya. Great points :)

@FreedomBreeze24 On an individual level everyone is different. However, statistically women prefer company in trying times while men prefer solitude.

This has been shown in various studies, the one I remember most entailed telling people they were going to have to go through a painful operation while conscious. The women in the study preferred to have a large group of friends with them before the ordeal (obviously there was no operation, they just entered a room and were told what was going on) while the men preferred to be in the waiting room alone.

I can try and find the paper if you are interested. However it's been a long time since I last read it...

It's due to the hormonal differences, the average man has 5 times the testosterone the average woman has running through their body.

Testosterone is responsible for men's (generally) higher aggression and competitive nature but also causes a trend towards stoicism in personality.

Males with severe testosterone deficiency almost always become depressed so the typical hormonal differences between women and men are more likely the reason for the difference in rate of depression between the genders rather than the 'Women can't stand to be alone!' argument.

Of course, individuals on both sides subvert these trends because the human brain is basically evolution on steroids. Because we are forming new connections in our brains all the time and because out brains are also in control of our hormones we can make significant mental changes (on an individual basis) withing a single generation.

If you raised a woman in an environment in which typically masculine behaviours created greater reward than typically feminine behaviours, the brain would learn this and up the levels of testosterone (especially during and after puberty) making them more stoic and creating a preference for solitude in hard times. In some cases this can actually result in minor physical changes such as a tendency to grow more, thicker facial hair etc.

Similarly if you were to raise a man in an environment which rewards typically feminine behaviours over typically masculine ones their brain would adapt and they would be less stoic, more emotionally open and cause them to prefer company and emotional support during hard times.

Well, that turned into a bit of an information splurge... Sorry about that.
I just find neurology, mental health and (providing it's actually done properly) psychology incredibly interesting.

TLDR: You are right, depression in women has nothing to do with an 'inability to live and thrive independently' however, under typical non mental health related stresses and trials women do prefer people and support so the guy saying 'surround yourself with people' isn't entirely off track, it just doesn't fit for situations like these...

you think depression occurs in women due to their inherent inability to live and thrive independently? uh ok maybe you should do some research

It doesn't matter how many people are present, you still feel alone...

I discovered that women feel depressed, anxious, or inattentive, and are more likely to take prescription medication than men as per Medco Health Solutions. Women are at 29% while men are at 15%. That is almost double the value between the genders. I have a very educated guess as to why. Men are biologically used to be on their own and independent from their hunter gatherer societies. Go hunting in the woods and you will see the isolation. Women on the other hand were more socially interconnected and need it to survive mentally because they did not need deal with such a situation. Humans may have moved into buildings in this modern age, but the underlying biological/evolutionary mechanisms are still there. In the present day, women have been brain washed by feminism into thinking they can do it all by themselves and thrive in isolation like men. It will not work and you start seeing this massive difference in  depressed and anxiety between the sexes. Even in my work place there are girls moving to cities with more people they know because they can stand the isolation.

Unfortunately mental illness isn't like your standard medical problem and can't be found by checking your temperature or using a stethoscope lol. Having suffered from it I have experiences a lot of doctors who don't even know how to approach it and the solution is different for each person and is definitely not a quick fix. Trust me I wish it was! lol

I guess its hard to relate to it, but if you have an issue. Solve it! Maybe its a  guy thing of solving problems or dealing with it one way or another. Go stand outside a therapist and don't go away until there is a solution or bribe them with cookies. LOL.

When you have that sort of mental disorder, it becomes very difficult to speck to people. You know how she mentioned that she forgot how to talk to her flat mate? That's someone she's obviously really comfortable with but still had trouble speaking to, so while it'd be wonderful if we could just talk to someone and our problems would go away, that's not the reality of it.


If you went to a party and someone slipped some chemical into your drink and it made you feel weird then you would go see a doctor to find something to counteract that chemical and that would be a normal thing for you to do. Depression is not really different than that because your brain chemistry is not working for you. Finding a doctor for correcting brain chemical changes is even harder than dating or finding some one to marry. Meet as many doctors as the system will allow and try dozens of meds because each one is going to be different for each person. Some will only work for little while and then you will have to try another. But Keep Trying.  Correcting brain chemistry is like preforming surgery on an ant through a telescope when the ant is on the moon and your wearing boxing gloves. Hugs.


QUICK! get to the WORD OF GOD (Holy Bible kjv): Isaiah 61:3, Matthew 6:34, and the POWER to overcome these DEMONIC attacks of Heaviness (Depression) & Anxiety (Fear): Acts 1:8 & Hebrews 11:1 - only THROUGH Jesus😇 HE IS A VERY PRESENT HELP IN TROUBLE-Psalm 46:1...PROVERBS 3:5&6...Luvv You 😘

It’s all well saying read the bible but my brain works on fact. And I know for a fact the bible is just a made up story (possibly created to control and conquer humanity) so if you enjoy fairy tails the bible is for you but if you are like me you need facts to help you.

exactly i was born addicted to heroin never met my birth family was adopted then my adopted dad left i lived a life stuck in sin then god blessed me with lyme disease for 15 years the anxiety and depression i had was to much to bear  it was a hell no one could imagine i am a fighter but i just kept smoking weed watching porn drinking putting my girlfriend over god because of her looks god showed me  a separation from god is death i finally gave up my family had abandoned me my grandmother was about to die my girl took off with someone else i used to weigh 200 pounds i was an athlete then i was 138 I'm 6 feet tall i was about to die i was alone on christmas eve i got on my knees alone in front   of the cross at the church i went to as a kid that night i decided to go put everything i had in an envelope and wrote merry christmas Jesus loves you i placed it on a homeless man sleeping under a bridge on the way home i chose to help someone at my darkest hour this earth is about love and compassion. the next day i threw everything i had negative away hundreds of dollars of stuff video games bongs everything god came to me he told me to trust him with my life and he would set me free i had been taking meds for a long time nothing was working i was done so i said god I'm ready to die my body is yours i moved into my closet with my dog and a my bible and my guitar he healed me it took about a month now no more anxiety depression my disease is gone i ran up a mountain today thank you Jesus king of kings if any one reads this go help someone with less than you. you can't do it alone ask god to help you then don't sin ask him to help you not sin thats what he is there for its hard at first but if you hang in there read your bible don't hang out with anyone till you make it through the storm ask him to put the right people in your life to help you he will. if you call out to him he will come he hates to see his children suffer the devil loves it and let me tell you he is very real. trust god and he will set you free if not it will only get worse god will let you suffer more and more until you repent and come to him this is for the good soil i love you all I'm praying for you all god bless!!


I got so many friends who try to be 'not normal' by saying 'uhh Pls hurt me' or 'Oh oh look now! I'm shaking! Sorry if I scare you bc I'm crazy' and do thingts like totally freaking out about something so small or they constantly try to get attemntion by telling other people how they're 'not normal'. <br>I'm a very..peaceful?...girl so I'm just like 'oh' and 'yeah I know that feeling' but it still hurts to see them trying so hard to be not okay. And they don't get it.

I got so many friends who try to be 'not normal' by saying 'uhh Pls hurt me' or 'Oh oh look now! I'm shaking! Sorry if I scare you bc I'm crazy' and do thingts like totally freaking out about something so small or they constantly try to get attemntion by telling other people how they're 'not normal'.
I'm a very..peaceful?...girl so I'm just like 'oh' and 'yeah I know that feeling' but it still hurts to see them trying so hard to be not okay. And they don't get it.


No matter how many people tell me that 'my problems are not insignificant' I always believe that they are. I've often thought that I have social anxiety but I refuse to tell anyone because I have friends who have been properly diagnosed with anxiety by a doctor and I don't wont to 'self diagnose' myself because I feel like that is really ignorant to do, I don't know what's wrong with me someone help please omg


So I thought this was just some existential crisis thing but it may be a bit of depersonalization.  I was born at 27 weeks. And sometimes I wonder if this is all a dream, if I've never woken up and my mom is by my bedside of 13 year old comatose me and so upset. Or that theory that we're aliens and aliens could be real freaks me out. And religion contradicts with science and makes me doubt myself and that theory and the idea that we're all in a video game and sorry it's just me. Maybe it's not just me. You're not alone if you think this too. I'm probably not alone.


I have depression and anxiety and it sucks<br>As well as derealization, depersonalization, ocd, and add/adhd, and paranoia now woot

I have depression and anxiety and it sucks
As well as derealization, depersonalization, ocd, and add/adhd, and paranoia now woot


I nearly cried then I just heard " ENNNNNN Marge Simpson " 😂😂😂😂😂😂 I love her


sometimes it'll be the first week of school and then it feels like I blink or go to sleep and I wake up and it's the last day of school and I have no idea what happened in between and that I was just like a robot or numb or something for a year


Is this me? A lot of time I just can't focus, I'm just not there, like I can't even focus my eyes at all like I just do things and stuff. Also right now I'm admitting to cutting myself and hurting myself in other ways. I have a lot of suicidal thoughts but most of the time I just want to do *something*, in the middle of the night just run. So I don't know if I actually have a mental illness but yeah that is how I feel thanks


Im a sci fi fan, Im just nerdy im sick of just not being able to be myself. Im not attention seeker Im the type thats like to just be in the background. People always stare and make me feel uncomfortable. They always expect that you're got it sorted. Now I deliberately dress scruffy with hoodies and joggers cause Ive totally lost interest in fashion and looking good. But even now I cant win cause people look at me, some even act like, why you looking like that dude? that isnt you.<br>                       I cant even focus right now and really say what I want to say about this and let it out cause Im just too self concious of everyone in this damn library all glancing over. I hate people, especially young generation, they act so vain and shallow, what a shit society today.

Im a sci fi fan, Im just nerdy im sick of just not being able to be myself. Im not attention seeker Im the type thats like to just be in the background. People always stare and make me feel uncomfortable. They always expect that you're got it sorted. Now I deliberately dress scruffy with hoodies and joggers cause Ive totally lost interest in fashion and looking good. But even now I cant win cause people look at me, some even act like, why you looking like that dude? that isnt you.
                       I cant even focus right now and really say what I want to say about this and let it out cause Im just too self concious of everyone in this damn library all glancing over. I hate people, especially young generation, they act so vain and shallow, what a shit society today.


I really don't have anything to say besides that I hope you get well soon and that you are really beautiful. I would give you a hug but you're not near me and it would be weird because you don't know me so that would make it creepy :)


i had edibles (weed) a few days ago and i feel depersonalized from it and it hasn't ended and i feel scared that i will stay like this for a long time and i won't be able to pass my classes and i'm so scared


Someone help please?? Lately I've been getting really good grades in school, the best in my class actually. And any normal person would say to just be thankful and happy about that, that's what I tried to tell myself for a while. But the problem for me is how much I've had to sacrifice in order to get those grades. I spend hours at a time studying and just trying to understand anything in my books and also trying to manage to do all my homework, which has resulted in major damages in my social life, mentality, physical appearance and other things that you want to keep nice and healthy. And the problem is that when I have free time, I start to search my mind for books I have to study and just things I have to do and that I worry about in general. And then when I have literally nothing to do, I get stressed because I feel like I'm forgetting something or being incredibly unproductive. It's kind of like that guilty feeling you get in the summer when everyone is out having fun and doing really cool shit but you've been inside on your computer for the whole day, except I get that feeling when ever I'm not doing anything involving school. I can't even shower or eat anymore without thinking "wow, I'm wasting so much time right now." And it's not just school. I've been struggling with my weight (even though I'm technically underweight), my skin, my braces, things that nobody even cares about, yet I can't help but to feel insecure about them. Sometimes I also feel like my friends and family don't care about me. I haven't even spoken to my parents this week. They always avoid me whenever I walk in to the same room as them.They know somethings wrong with me, but they just don't know how to help me and they alway make me feel like I'm a constant burden, and that at my inability to see my fiends that often has resulted in me feeling constantly alone. And god I miss my them  so much. I miss the times when I wouldn't have to worry about anything except for when the watermelon seeds I had swallowed would start to grow inside my stomach. I miss the carelessness of the summer nights I would spend laughing till I couldn't breathe. I searched some symptoms of depression online just to check, and it turns out I have most of them. As if the recurring dream I've been having of me killing myself wasn't enough. I also already know I have anxiety. Probably because I moved from America to Greece when I was six and always thinks I'm an idiot just because I can't remember some random word or a phrase in one language or the other, and i feel like all my teachers label me as that one stupid foreign exchange student, even though that obviously isn't happening, I can't help but worry about it all the time. Now that I think about it , it seems like the majority of my problems are created be me. I think I'm just very self destructive. There's so much more that's wrong with me that I could write but I feel like I already wrote too much. I guess this was more venting than what it was meant to be in the beginning. If you're still reading I don't really know what to say. Thanks and sorry?? I'm going to be pasting this comment on a few other videos as well so more people can see it. I think I'm going to go take a shower now. Oops I just realized that I haven't taken I shower in an entire week. Ok bye


you may not notice this but dodie hi. I;m depressed can you um let me know Im still normal? you know what dont worry about it


dont tell me im the only one that cried?


Stimulants make you feel worse like alcohol, caffeine and sugar


I can confirm that everyone thinks I'm high.. it's wonderful


HOW DO YOU WORD EVEN THE MOST HORRIBLE THINGS SO BEAUTIFUL


i just wanna befriend all the people in the comment section and give everyone a hug <33


Also sunglasses might help with everything being so bright


People think that depression has to be caused by something tragic like death, disease or such stuff. It annoys me


I haven’t been here either since I was 16 I kind of lost my hop and I don’t know what is going on I am 20 and it’s mess


mild form of psychosis here. it's the worst... wish i wasn't here.


i know that this was made a little while ago but i feel the exact same way that i'm not really here but i can see and kinda feel what's going on but i'm not really here already said that but i don't really even know whats going on in this exact moment so i don't know. i'm not truly knowing what going on i'm sad and on top of that i don't even know what's going on. Iv'e tried therapy before but they said the same thing, try being more you. But how can you be "more you" if you don't even know who "you" are.  And i'm overwhelmed with all of this and find myself crying out of no where and over legit nothing at all


Just saying,in the thumbnail you look like Pam Beasley from the office😂😊❤👍🏼


I don't disbelieve in drs. it's just I'm not sure I have realistic expectations of what they should do.  then I wonder is it worth it since they can't cure me, nore can i? how does one progress to solve a problem which can't be solved?


I'm 13...I have depression depersonalization anxiety and panic attacks. I just left school and I said that I have a headache..Gosh I wanna die. I just have panic attacks with everything. I can't watch the sky it makes me panicking


And today 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏???

Praying its cured, or atleast you're coping with it better?

in one of her newer videos "why covid time feels like depersonalisation" she talks about how after trying many different treatments it still is not cured and she's coping by just accepting it's there


i love you and i'm hugging you virtually


I always come to this video when I'm struggling. This just helps me get out of my head when I'm in one of my lower moments of depression. It reminds me that alot of people go through it. It just puts how I feel into words and that makes it seem easier to handle. Thank you, Dodie.


Thanks, Dodie. Sometimes I'm feeling quite similar and that's kind of, not good, but relieving that there are people feeling that way too.


4:15 my heart was shattering in pain and sympathy for the beautiful human that is Dodie


I've felt this everyday of my life for two years and I never knew anyone else felt like this. It's like a whole new world. Thank you for my realization it is scary but a little relieving and it's getting better but sometimes it doesn't feel like things are real


Dear Dodie, I've fallen in love with you (and your face) over the past few weeks and I'm so proud that you are able to talk about your mental health so openly and honestly. I nearly cried when you talked about wanting to go back in time because that's something I've always thought about and longed for, and I really appreciate knowing I'm not the only one in this world who has feelings like this- Feeling like the world is big and scary and you just want to be ten again and go play with sticks and grass outside and feel safe. I think you're on to something with meditation. It's hard to make a place for yourself in life as you get older in which you can feel a similar kind of safe and as I've started meditation here and there over the last few years I've come to realize the safe place must reside within you so you can carry it with you always. I applaud you for seeking help so your mind can be healthy. I see both a psychologist and a psychiatrist, and I find the two together to be of immense help because when one changes my medication and my thoughts get weird I can talk to the other about it and sort out all the weird in my head. I love love love that you talk about acting normal when you don't feel like it because there are still things that make you happy and you can still have fun in your life and be happy even if you secretly feel weird inside. Those, for me, are words of encouragement and I love your tenacious and positive approach to life. <br>Sarah

Dear Dodie, I've fallen in love with you (and your face) over the past few weeks and I'm so proud that you are able to talk about your mental health so openly and honestly. I nearly cried when you talked about wanting to go back in time because that's something I've always thought about and longed for, and I really appreciate knowing I'm not the only one in this world who has feelings like this- Feeling like the world is big and scary and you just want to be ten again and go play with sticks and grass outside and feel safe. I think you're on to something with meditation. It's hard to make a place for yourself in life as you get older in which you can feel a similar kind of safe and as I've started meditation here and there over the last few years I've come to realize the safe place must reside within you so you can carry it with you always. I applaud you for seeking help so your mind can be healthy. I see both a psychologist and a psychiatrist, and I find the two together to be of immense help because when one changes my medication and my thoughts get weird I can talk to the other about it and sort out all the weird in my head. I love love love that you talk about acting normal when you don't feel like it because there are still things that make you happy and you can still have fun in your life and be happy even if you secretly feel weird inside. Those, for me, are words of encouragement and I love your tenacious and positive approach to life.
Sarah


So much love for you Dodie. This video sums up my life, as well as the life of hundreds of people. I hope these last few months have been better for you, and that you're getting the support you need. 💖💖


Hopefully you're doing better now dodie! I can't imagine how hard it was to film this video, but thank you for doing it. Helps me a lot with my own demons.


i understand sm honestly, i get/have all of these conditions and i get emotional attachment to like everything. Every day is hard and seeing that someone else has these problems too helps me. Keep fighting dodie ily WE CAN DO THIS TOGETHER!


Thank you Dodie. You've expressed in 9.53 what I've been tumbling with since I was about 8... I'm now nearing 40.<br>The NHS sounds good to me, here in Australia, patients only get 10 sessions with a Psych per year, then it becomes expensive (for me at least) per session - it's like - here's some help but heal fast or you're on your own again!

Thank you Dodie. You've expressed in 9.53 what I've been tumbling with since I was about 8... I'm now nearing 40.
The NHS sounds good to me, here in Australia, patients only get 10 sessions with a Psych per year, then it becomes expensive (for me at least) per session - it's like - here's some help but heal fast or you're on your own again!


Brilliantly put! It is such a hard subject to talk about when experiencing it, but I'm happy for you that you did. Thank you for making this, I wish you the best of luck and lots of love!


I've had depersonalization since I was 8 years old and I only found out about a year ago what it was. It really is the scariest feeling.


Thank you so much for helping me identify my depersonalization/derealization. For about two years I have been trying extremely hard to discover what was wrong. I would cry and get upset because I knew it was something but I could not figure it out. I would describe if to friends sand family and they had no idea what I was talking about. My parents wouldn't take me to the doctor because they didn't even believe me. Thank you so much dodie.


I've lived my entire life going back and forth to a doctor, each time I come to terms with one thing, I realise something else is fucked up. Generalised anxiety, social anxiety, borderline personality disorder. It never stops. It hurts to know that you struggle with depersonalisation disorder, as I haven't been diagnosed so I didn't mention it but I can easily relate to many parts of that.
I hate seeing people around me upset and would prefer to take all the weight of there problems by myself, and then not get any help because I'm convinced I'm strong enough to deal with it.
Doesn't help that my dad works in the CQC and could easily throw me into some mental hospital somewhere lmao.


Laying in bed with so much anxiety exploding within me and remembering this video helped me understand that I'm not alone in how I'm feeling


I love you Dodie. I relate to this so much and I cried so much and I'm so sorry <b>hugs</b> You're incredible, I'm so proud of you.

I love you Dodie. I relate to this so much and I cried so much and I'm so sorry *hugs* You're incredible, I'm so proud of you.


Thank you so much for sharing this , it helps a lot and I hope you're feeling much better now.


Hey. You're not alone! I've found that just remembering that and listening to meditation videos helps me quite a bit. This struggle, as awful as it is, can help you grow.


Dodie, I just want you to know that this video was enormously helpful to me when one of my students started experiencing depersonalisation at school. I had never heard of it before seeing your video but hearing about it made me do a little research so when my student told me about it (cos it caused her to have a panic attack, I think) I recognised it and was able to reassure her a bit instead of wondering what on earth she was talking about. I'm sorry that this is something you have to deal with but thank you so much for sharing your experiences with us because I don't know how I would have handled this situation without it xx


I've suffered from major depressive disorder since 2001. I've been through the ringer over the years and feel for anyone who has to go through life battling an illness that most people don't care to talk about. Thanks for the you tube videos on depression🙏🙏


Dodie, thank you so much. I have been so sad---you know, the kind of sad where you feel like it's just the end of all other feelings because there isn't room for any others--- and I've been thinking about my life a lot. Like in the sense that if it wouldn't make my friends and family sad, how much easier my life would be if it were just <b>poof</b> gone. This video is so helpful.

Dodie, thank you so much. I have been so sad---you know, the kind of sad where you feel like it's just the end of all other feelings because there isn't room for any others--- and I've been thinking about my life a lot. Like in the sense that if it wouldn't make my friends and family sad, how much easier my life would be if it were just *poof* gone. This video is so helpful.


Thank you for being brave and sharing this!
This doesn't make you not you anymore. Your still you. This is a thing that happens.
I'm SO! glad your taking really good steps to do the best you can!


I've literally just been through this entire situation exactly, I started experiencing the depersonalization thing after a band competition one afternoon and I didn't know how to explain it so when it happened more often I'd be like "oh it's just like after the band competition" and dude it was weird I had to have friends remind me that I did indeed still exist and my friend Gigi would have to tell me the date and time to set that in and maaaan it's fucked


hey dodie. thank you for this. it means the world to know that someone gets it. keep smiling.


I can relate to you. I am almost 13 and I suffer with self harming and anxiety issues. you have inspired me to do something about it  I love you and stay strong for me xxx


I have been going through the exact same thing you are. Well, not really, because everyone is different, but still. Every time you felt crazy or like people were judging, those were the same thoughts that went through my head. Your symptoms sounded like mine. I am a happy kid with depression, anxiety, and depersonalization. You gave me such a brilliant outlook, because I see myself similar to you. We aren't crazy we are unique and you inspire me this was a brilliant video I wish I saw a few months ago. Thank you for being you and talking about it so people like me can relate to you and feel a little less crazy.


I experienced depersonalisation before and I only hound out what it was from this video. Thanks dodie for helping me I love you so much and your whole channel helps me get through every day


dodie i have been subscribed for so long, i never seen this video until now.
I have depersonalisation and derealisation. I have it 24/7. it's EXTREME.
ALL - THE - TIME. ALL THE TIME. I know exactly how you feel. I wish I could take it all away from you.

To anyone else. No one believed me either. I found a psychiatrist who believed me. If medical staff are not helping. ALWAYS try someone else people.


I feel the same. I think I've had symptoms that lead to depression for around 6 years (4 years at the least) and anxiety has become a little more prominent for me in the past couple of years, but every time I go to the doctor, I get shut down, and I'm too scared to just outright say "I'm mentally ill" (I'm in a really awkward life situation where it's far too difficult to do that) and idk what to do. I can't concentrate in school and my grades have been slowly dropping and I'm so tired all the time. I can't do it myself and I can't speak to people and it's so annoying waiting for someone to pick up on it because I've been like it for so long and it's seen as part of my personality


This video means so much to me because I 'suffer' from depression, anxeity and depersonalisation too. I went through the same process as you did thinking I was going mad and losing my mind and it scared the shit out of me. It started when I was 13-14 and it has taking me untill now, I'm 18, to finally feel somewhat normal and h a p p y agian. I have some really great people and friends around me who has helped me talk about and deal with this. Talking about it really helps and Im so happy im not alone with feeling like this. Stay strong ❤


so much love for you. you're an amazing human. you are strong and loved


Hey dodie. I've been going through this right now. I also research and found out what I am feeling is DPD through internet. I am not ready yet to walk into a doctor because I am a bit hopeful. Then I came across your video, I am a fan of your music and this is the only thing makes me feel better since I felt the anxiety. It is really a bit comforting to realize you are not alone. I know its going to be a battle but Im gonna hang on. I thought I just wan you to know this vid made me feel alive.


i love you for this. so much. i feel similar a lot of the time. every time i tell anyone (about these sorts or feelings or even actually being physically ill) everyone acts like im making it up.

 like i had salmonella a few weeks ago and legit thought i could have been dying and everyone, even the effin doctor was acting like i was making it up. i was literally bleeding from places i shouldnt have been bleeding and in so much pain i thought i was dying and everyone kept acting like i was making it up. until they called me with test results and everyone was like "oh im sorry... i thought you were faking"

i dont know how to convince people that what i feel is actually what im feeling if they cant even believe me when i have physical symptoms. and no one understands when i say it feels like im not there. or when everything feels like a dream. i dont know how to tell anyone in a way that makes them understand


Thank you so much for your strength and for talking about this. We all care a lot about you, and I hope you feel better. I never hear anyone talking about Depersonalization, and I have been dealing with it since I was 15. I cannot talk to parents about it, or get mental health help because it is too expensive, and it helps to hear others talk about their experiences. It helps me feel less isolated. I love you <3


To anyone else who keeps feeling compelled to come back and watch this video over and over because you can relate to it so much, I hope you're ok and looking after yourselves <3


I feel like this all the time, usually it's pretty lowkey, just sitting in the back of my head. and then there are days like today, where it's sitting on my chest restricting my breathing making it all I can see. I spend a hour laying my floor questioning everything.


This video helped me soo much right now and your words gave me so much courage right now, thank u very much for this! <3


I have asperger's syndrome, so you could technically say that I have a permanent mental illness. I get what you are/were feeling.


Never in all this time I've felt this way have I heard someone say the words that describe how I'm feeling. It's surreal but it's so good. I told people how I felt and they thought it was a physical thing so I assumed it was. Maybe some balance disorder or something with low blood pressure that made me feel out of it. I've been skipping so many lectures and calling in sick at work thinking I was gonna die, I had a brain tumor or something, I couldn't figure it out and felt hopeless and mad. I can't thank you enough for the words you spoke. It made me feel a bit less alone and even if that's just a tiny bit, it's something. I'm starting therapy on the 24th. Thank you.


thank you for being brave and taking about the challenges of mental illness


Depersonalization is one  the strangest experiences I've ever had. It's like your floating above your own life watching it unfold in a time lapse.


this is the first video of yours that i've watched and ever since then i've been watching you and you have inspired me so much. i'm 15 and i feel exactly like you discribed. i've been feeling like this for a while now(year or so). i used to ignore it really easily but it has only gotten worse. i have no one to talk to nor can i go to therapist because it's considered weird here where i am from. i recently told a friend about this but i kinda regret it for unknown reason. i just don't know what i feel anymore.


I've been getting derealization for six months after some trauma and depression. It's so scary I feel like I'm going crazy. I tried to tell people how I feel but they thought I was on drugs. I don't know what to do anymore to be honest.


i have had it solidly for four years, it means so much more to hear someone else talking about it.


I've suffered from depersonalization for years.. I cried to the receptionist on the phone at a therapist office - that's how desperate I was for answers as to what I was feeling. It is really the worst feeling in the world and unless the people you talk to about it have experienced it, they will never know truly what it's like. Things get better, you will have better days and worse days. Just have to do your best to cope with the weird feelings. At least that's what I do.


this video is what helped me finally realise what is my main problem. I seem to suffer badly from a lot of similar things to you, from depersonalisation especially. I never really feel there, I don't remember a lot of things that happen. I often can just see me living my life, but I'm not living it. It makes life very difficult, especially school. I don' t know when or how to combat this and get over it, but I'm lucky enough to have a few people to help (thanks l <3). I need help, I really do. but dodie you've helped. Maybe we can get through this together.


i've felt like that. i've like i'm in a movie watching myself go through the motions of the day. i feel like i'm watching my friends talk to me and watching everyone go around which means i'm literally surprised when i have to speak


Ugh, I've had depersonalisation once or twice. Its the most terrifying thing ever. You really feel like you're never going to be normal old you again. I've read about it on the internet too but I never talked to someone who actually experienced it before. Nice to know that I'm not alone. But not nice for you that you experience it :( Thanks for making this video.


This was some time ago and I am very happy that Dodie is better now. Though i am just a passing comment on a past video i want to thank Dodie for making many people, including myself,  feel better.


Just stummbled upon this video... dealing with depression for several years now I can relate to what you're/you were going through.

Mental illness is no joke and you can't really describe it so others can understand. You just feel... unnormal and down and powerless and stuff. So I hope you are better now and that everything is okay with you now :) Really love the fact that you don't pretend to be happy or something you are not, stay awesome <3


thank you for reminding me that i am doing the right thing going to therapy even though i hate it


thank you, for putting into words what a lot of us are thinking daily. x


I haven't felt myself in months and it's so hard. I feel like I'm crazy and like I'm just stuck in this huge whirlwind of anxiety and not feeling myself and I don't know what to do.


Lately this has been happening to me and I didn't know what it is till i watched this... makes a lot of sense now


how did I miss this video... how... I feel like an ass for not being there for you. I adore you so much . seeing you sad is heart wrenching. dodie I love you be strong because you're a beautiful person.


oh man, i bursted out crying >< when you said you're probably thinking Dodie stop being silly etc i was like I AM NO WHERE NEAR THINKING THIS I AM THINKING DODIE THANK GOD I'M NOT ALONE QQ


You'll be ok, hard work and love. And you're not crazy ;p You're just having a hard time. So am I, so <b>hugs</b> hopefully this message makes you feel good :3

You'll be ok, hard work and love. And you're not crazy ;p You're just having a hard time. So am I, so *hugs* hopefully this message makes you feel good :3


i really relate to the texts in the beginning but i always pushed it off to the side bc i have this endocrine thing that makes me emotional if my prescription is off so i never really thought about mental illness until recently and finding someone who feels the same is really comforting bc i know i'm not alone


I've had SAD since I was small, and I've struggled with depersonalization for the last few years and it won't go away.


I so relate to this video. And I haven't gotten to the point of depression (yet) but I have recently had a mental breakdown because I just felt like myself as I was years ago and as I liked myself and I hadn't felt that in such a long time that I just had a metal breakdown and broke off in tears and I was in tears the whole weekend


I am so proud of you for having this plan and getting help. It isn't easy, it's not gonna be easy, but one day, you'll wake up and realize, that you're feeling so much better, than you did back then. I am/was myself struggling with depression, social anxiety,  panic attacks, bulimia and depersonalisation (which really is terrifying). I am in recovery for 2 yrs, I have even been hospitalised. And I am not okay, but I feel so much better than I did before. So if anyone of you is struggling, I promise I get better.


Lately I've been feeling detached from the world and myself. I've been having troubles falling asleep and I've been scared of stupid things that wouldn't normally scare me. I know something is wrong with me. For the past half a month I've been feeling very off/detached. I haven't brought this up to anyone, but I think I should at this point. I'm not feeling any better. (Sorry I just needed to say something I don't expect anyone to reply. I just needed to let it out somehow)


I love you so much. I just want to hug you for so long. I started crying half way through the video. You are great.


ive been watching 2 of your videos and i feel better knowing someone feel the same as i do. i dont know is it a good thing or no for feeling better while you on the other hand is suffering too, but having someone that has the same problem makes me feel better and not alone. i swear i dont want anybody to feel as shitty as i am right now because the feeling that  i feel right now its the last thing i expect everyone to feel while i am alive. it feels like empty, i no longer cry about my problems, but when i saw your video i cried. and it was a good thing that i cried because you make me feel more normal, its better than i feel nothing. i know how you feel but please, dont give up in everything around u. please dont feel worthless or anything like that, cause i know you will pass this thing sooner💜 xx


Depersonalisation. It is the scariest thing I have ever experienced. Comes back every now and then. Makes everything so... lonely. And it's like it ensures things will remain that way. What if this is it? What if I will always see things from the outside? The closest thing I can compare it to is those dreams you wake up in that seemingly never end, you can't discern things from dream and reality.


I can recommend CBT therapy it helped me a lot when I was tuck in a deep dark hole of depression and anxiety


My mouth fell open when you said that your doctor told you that you were making it up. It disgusts me that medical professionals have the capacity to tell their patients that they are simply not experiencing something. I know that this video is old, but for anyone watching it (and for Dodie as well if you're still struggling with this), you are real. You are experiencing this. Your feelings are real and you deserve help. As someone who has struggled (and continues to struggle) with anxiety and depersonalization, I know that it's scary, but you will be okay. I promise. Stay strong everyone!


I've experienced probably the same exact thing she has, I am not sure because I don't have the lexicon to describe it accurately and thoroughly haha.  But hearing from her and all you guys makes me feel so much better because it makes me feel like I am not as insane as I thought as I was. So thank you for sharing your experience, Dodie, and everyone else!! :D


so I feel like I've been dealing with anxiety for a very very long time. I don't just get worried about things, I completely obsess over them to the point of not being about to talk or think about anything else for days, and I have experienced panic attacks due to this. I also get very bad crowd anxiety to the point where I can no longer go to concerts without having a panic attack. I read symptoms of anxiety and I literally feel every single one... but it doesn't impact my life "enough" for me to feel like I should go to a doctor.

my question here is do I go to a doctor anyway and stop this before it gets worse? the only issue is my mum, who I am very close with, has a very shaded view of mental illness and, unless a person is acc "crazy", she doesn't think mental illness exists in the same way that physical illnesses do.

so idk what to do... can someone give me some advice maybe? thanks xxx


I feel the same as this but I didn't know what it meant...thanks you


I think it's nice to see you open up, yes it hurts to see you nearly cry and be so upset. But honestly it makes me feel better. To see someone I love and care about so much have been through the same things as me and I have been going to a therapist councillor person and she thinks I'm either autistic or have depersonalisation, it's scary right now but whilst you're here and I can see that it's helping. I have you showing us that it's ok to be not ok and I have my friends who have depression and anxiety and autism. It helps to see that maybe I'm not making it up even if people are telling me I am. Thank you dodie your helping a lot xx


It gives me so much comfort that someone with depersonalisation can be so positive and achieve so many amazing things, you honestly are an inspiration. I haven't had a whole lot of social interaction for the past few years apart from close friends and family, and have been off work for a while because of a breakdown which caused depersonalisation. I actually managed to find the courage and apply for my first job in 3 years the other day and have been offered an interview, which i'm very very nervous about because it's so difficult to think straight, but this video has honestly been such a comfort knowing that I'm not alone


okay, i have an issue. i've been pretty badly depressed for a while now, and it's taken a long time but i've finally come to terms with it and stopped denying it. i have a lot of symptoms, and it took me a while, but i realised that that's what it was. i really want to go to therapy bc i think it will help with my depression, but i'm really scared to ask my mum because we haven't talked about anything like that, like, ever, and i'm scared she'll think i'm making it up, which she probably won't, but i still can't stop thinking she will. and i know in the logical part of my brain that therapy will help me, but some part of me gets REALLY panicky about the thought of telling anyone but my friends about how i feel. i know i need to tell my mom that i'm depressed, but
1. i'm 12 so she may think it's a phase (which is unlikely but still)
2. we haven't really talked about stuff like that, and while i am open about liking girls (i've told my mum about girls i've had crushes on and even asked her permission to date one of my friends before when she asked me out, to which my mum said yes), i have no idea how to approach her about something like this
3. again, the panicky thing. my heart is racing at even the thought of telling my mum. it's probably totally irrational, because my mum is great and really accepting, but as we've never discussed mental illness before, i have NO IDEA how she will react, and that's what's scary.
can anyone help me? i really think therapy will be a good idea but i need to ask my mum first. does anyone have any suggestions?


marge simpson. - literally, how does Dodie continue being so cute and funny when she is feeling like this?


whenever i experience depersonalization it's like im watching myself from the outside and everything around me is just a lesser version of itself? like sounds are duller and i can't properly focus on things, kind of like a dream effect filter in a movie or something. it feels like im in an alternate universe of what i remember the world being like. im not sure if that makes sense but it's the best way of describing it.


Thank you. Thank you so so much for sharing this.


hello! I just wanted to say I understand and can relate to this a lot, please know you're not alone and you can do this love 💕 take care of yourself, excersize, eat healthy and preach that self love, run yourself a hot bath and have some tea !